Tangled Youth
by mari4815
Summary: Boone's life as a teenager before the crash and his relationship with Shannon and his family. It's over! I finished!
1. Chapter 1

_**Tangled Youth** _

**Chapter 1**

He couldn't remember exactly when Sabrina had told him – his busy, preoccupied mother, juggling his plastic lunch boxes with her investment plans, or if she had just let it slip in somewhere, clumped into one of his morning bowls of oatmeal. "Adam's got a daughter your age," she might have said, matter-of-fact, but it didn't matter, because one day a young girl moved into his house, and his morning bowls of oatmeal were no longer eaten in solitude.

Shannon, her name was, a name that Boone had associated with old people and the British, never with a tiny blonde eight year old ("almost nine," she corrected) who tapped her feet against the feet of the mahogany dining table, shaking it and sending drops of hot chocolate off of the table and into his lap. There was something about this smiling, talkative girl that didn't fit into the stately, quiet house – the stressed out mother and the diffident boy with gray eyes that bored into the floor.

And the father was there, but he was just a shadowy figure that scolded Shannon's wayward feet, came home at night, and cut her pieces of fish for her at the dinner table. He sat up straight at the edge of the table, present but absent all the same.

Every morning, as the current babysitter served them breakfast, Shannon's foot-tapping began to morph from annoying to neutral to endearing, and there finally came a day when the pink hairbrush on their bathroom counter wasn't any less foreign than the counter itself, and it would have been strange for her to be gone, uncomfortable even. When they left for school, she filled up the space in the car each morning with her incessant chatter, which was as natural to

Boone as it was precious. He would chime in a few words, to agree, or disagree, and she would either rebuff his comment or smile at it. His preference of the latter seemed perfectly normal until he started thinking about her smile more often than just at the moment of its appearance on her face.

Sometimes in class, as he learned about fractions in his fourth grade class or shot hoops in PE, her face flickered in his mind, and he tried to prevent these fantasies with everything in him. But it was useless, and when she touched him, on his hand or accidentally kicked him under the table, it was like the imprint of her touch stuck to his skin for days, the twinge he had felt tattooed on him. But her brand, the tattoo she would further stitch into him, was going to get deeper and deeper, until it would refuse to fade, obstinate just like she was.

One day when they arrived at their cold, impersonal home after school about a month after Shannon turned nine, a smiling Sabrina announced that they were going to get family portraits. Adam, the stepfather, was there as well, grumbling under his breath as they drove to the photographer's studio – but if Sabrina was going to play up this happy family image, she may as well take it the whole way. Because Sabrina liked to paint pictures, and somewhere in her mind she had figured that if she had high-quality, expensive portraits done of her family and hung them up, maybe they could become that. But being a family wasn't about being high-quality and expensive, he realized later. When the photos arrived, Sabrina said that they were beautiful, and it was flattering of everyone, and "oh, look at what a great job the photographer did with the lighting!" To Boone, however, it looked like it was all an act. Each of their expressions were "flattering", sure, but they were vacant, and Sabrina's hand resting on Shannon's shoulder was forced, Adam's weak smile conveying thoughts of other places and maybe some business deal he was currently working on. In the picture, Shannon and Boone sat next to each other, and they were the only people in the picture whose interactions seemed natural, their chairs at an angle facing towards each other.

Eachnight as Boone walked up the stairs to his bedroom, he passed a ghostly silhouette of the portrait, as it hung over the stairwell, and one night when he was thirteen, in the middle of the night, he suddenly remembered the photograph. He tiptoed downstairs, and stared at the picture.

"You too?" Boone was startled to hear Adam's voice, and he almost tripped on the stairs in surprise.

"I didn't notice you!" He explained, turning to see Adam sitting on the couch drinking brandy. "I couldn't sleep."

"You too?" He repeated, gazing at the portrait. "She's a character, isn't she?" Adam beckoned Boone to join him on the couch, and he sat down, feeling very slight in comparison to his tall stepfather.

"Who?"

"Shannon." Adam said simply. "She looks just like her mother in that picture… the eyes, the hair, the smile… Camilla was beautiful." Adam smiled wistfully.

"So is Shannon," Boone responded.

"She is," Adam said, taking another sip of his brandy and patting Boone on the knee. It was one of the only moments in Boone's life when he felt he had some sort of father.

Shannon was in sixth grade when Boone was in eighth. Shannon was on the older side of her grade ("almost twelve"), which explained why she was considerably taller than the rest of her classmates. Boone, on the other hand, was one of the youngest in his eighth grade class, his November birthday falling almost a year later than the oldest eighth graders, and because of that, he was quite slight – praying every time he stepped on a scale at the doctor's office that he might hit 5 foot 3 inches soon. And a young-looking, wide-eyed boy who preferred the library to the football field wasn't exactly intimidating. In fact, he was practically a magnet to be made fun of.

After a while, Boone got used to the boys in his class muttering "queer boy" under their breath at him and the popular girls giggling at him as they walked by. Some people were nicer, and sometimes a girl named Claire would sit down next to him, peer around the cover of his book, and ask him what book he was reading. She wasn't considered a dork like Boone, but she also wasn't considered one of the resident celebrities at their middle school, which held about four hundred students. Claire had wavy brown hair that she usually wore in a ponytail, and a chirpy voice that reminded him of Shannon's. And when she talked to him, he would answer her, in few word sentences, but what he said was rather boring, so he was confused about why she continued to make an effort to be friendly to her. Maybe she felt sorry for him, he thought. But most people didn't feel sorry for him, and mistook his shyness for an attitude, thanks to his mother's fame and fortune.

"Hey," he heard a rough voice say one day at lunch, and he looked up. "Yeah, I'm talking to you, _fag_." In front of him was a vast boy, Wallace Peterson, who grabbed the book that Boone was reading. "_The Fellowship of the Rings_?" He said disdainfully, looking at the cover, and throwing the book back onto the wooden bench that Boone was sitting on, the pages now creased and his spot in the book lost. "Hey Carlyle? Been helping your mom sew wedding dresses?"

"What do you want?" Boone looked Wallace right in the eye, ignoring his question, summoning all the courage in him to stand up to this boy.

"Boone?" Shannon rolled off of her bed, jumping up as she saw her brother lumbering through the hall angrily towards his room. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," He said, covering his bloody nose with his left hand, continuing walking quickly down the hall.

"Really?" She asked dubiously, and he prayed that she wouldn't follow him. He didn't want Shannon to see him this weak. But she did, right as he started to slam his door, she turned the handle, barging into his room and blocking the doorway with her body. "What happened?" She looked at his hand, which was covered in blood and hiding his nose.

"Nothing," Boone answered, opening the door part way and trying to push her out of his room by the shoulder. But Shannon was much stronger than Boone, both emotionally and physically, and she pushed her way through the doorway again and closed the door with a click.

"You got beat up, didn't you?" A smile began to form on her face. Boone looked away. "_You_ got beat up," she smirked.

Boone was insulted that she would laugh at him. "You wouldn't be laughing if it were you, would you?" He glowered at her.

"No – Boone, that's not what I – "Shannon bit her lip, causing the smile to disappear from her face. "I'm sorry," she said quietly, wrapping her arms around him in a warm hug. Boone let himself sink into her arms; it was these moments – the ones where she touched him, that left him thinking about it for days afterwards, so he might as well enjoy it. "Do you want me to help clean you up?" She pulled back. "I didn't want to get blood on my clothes," she shifted her feet. "I can get you some tissues and some hydrogen oxygen – "She started, raising her voice to cover the awkwardness from the hug, or maybe she hadn't noticed.

"It's hydrogen peroxide, Shannon." He corrected, his turn to smile.

"Oh," Shannon breathed, "peroxide. Because you have this really nasty cut on your forehead, and maybe I'll get you a band-aid too. Hold on!" His sister, graceful from years of ballet, scampered out of the room, and was back a minute later holding a brown bottle and a piece of gauze, along with an entire box of band-aids and Neosporin.

"Shannon," he said a few minutes later as he sat on the floor while she cleaned his forehead with a piece of gauze, biting her lips in concentration. She leaned back a little, switching her angle to put a drop of Neosporin on the cotton part of the band-aid. He could do this himself, and he should have told her, but he was enjoying this too much. "I really appreciate you doing this." She didn't respond.

"One time," Shannon began, a misty expression appearing on her face. He knew this expression; it was the one where Shannon would say something about her mother. Shannon barely spoke of her mother, and she was obviously uncomfortable towards talking about it, so he didn't push it. All he knew was that her mother, Camilla, had blonde hair like Shannon's and was dead. "I came home, and my mom was washing dishes, and she turned around, and I saw that she had a bunch of tiny scars on her wrist. I asked her what happened, and I wanted to go get the band-aids – I was like, four at the time, but she didn't let me, and instead she just walked out of the kitchen and went into her room. She even left the water running." Shannon said this distractedly as she pressed her fingers into the sticky part of the band aid against his forehead, completely oblivious. But Boone suspected he knew what Shannon was talking about – he had heard about people who cut themselves, and read about it in a Time magazine that has been lying around the house. He had skimmed the article, not understanding, but he was pretty sure that that was what Shannon was talking about.

"Oh," he responded. He thought about telling her, but it was clear by the way that Shannon talked about her, and always went on and on about how beautiful she had been, that she had an image of Camilla as someone perfect, and he didn't want to ruin that for her.

"You don't have to protect me. I know what they are, now." Shannon said stiffly, almost as if she were reading his mind.

"Wh- what happened to her?" Boone took inhaled deeply, not sure if it was in her place to ask.

"She died." Shannon smiled tightly, pulling away from Boone and standing up. "Your nose okay?" She asked, referring to the tissue that was currently stuffed up his nostril.

"Yeah," Boone said uncomfortably, knowing that he had overstepped his boundaries. "I'm sorr – "

"It's fine," Shannon mumbled, grabbing his hand to help pull him up. "What happened to your father?" She retorted after a few seconds.

"I don't know." Now that they were standing across from each other, he could see that she was about an inch taller than he was, and her amber eyes were stoic and determined. Just then, their housekeeper, Rosita, opened the door, asking them what they wanted for dinner. Sabrina would be at a client's rehearsal dinner, and David would be working late, as usual. _Just another day with invisible parents_, Boone thought bitterly as they exited the room.

_A/N – Just so you know, I know that "fag" is an extremely mean word, and I would never call someone that in real life. Anyway, please review and tell me what you thought! I'm actually super excited about this story, so I hope it is good! _


	2. Chapter 2

**_Tangled Youth_**

**Chapter 2 **

"Mom?" A fifteen year old Boone asked his mother as she rustled through papers in her home office. He was now a sophomore in high school, at a tiny Catholic school called Saint Gabriel's, and over the past two years he had grown a good three inches. Plus, he had made a couple of friends over the past few years, and to say the least, he wasn't reading graphic novels on cold benches over the duration of lunchtime at school anymore.

"Yes, honey?" Sabrina didn't look up from her desk, she was distracted as usual.

"Why won't you ever talk to me about my father?"

"Because it's not your business, _dear_." she snipped, mumbling something about being late to a meeting under her breath. He ignored her.

"Of course it's my business, he's my father."

"We seem to do just fine without him, don't we?" Sabrina dodged the question.

"Mom, I need some answers. I am fifteen years old, don't you think I'm mature enough for you to actually tell me _something_ about – "

"That's enough, Boone. I'm late, I need to go." Sabrina dropped a stack of papers. "Sweetheart, could you help me pick that up?" She bent over, kneeling to pick up the forms, and tucked a piece of stray hair behind her ear. Boone would have thought that her hair would stay in place – thanks to her, the entire second story of their house reeked of hairspray all day, and as long as they were going to be asphyxiated, he thought, shouldn't it at least work?

For Sabrina, a person who refused to show emotion, this was like a temper tantrum, Boone supposed, watching his mother scrambling through papers on the hardwood floor beneath them. He really _needed_ to know, though, he was sick of being asked about it, and tired of not having an answer. "I want to find him," he blurted out.

"Sweetheart," she said brusquely, which she only called him when she was upset with him. "I said, could you help me pick up these papers?" He picked up a few, stacking them neatly. "Thanks, honey, we should talk some more about that internship I was telling you about." Maybe Sabrina thought that if she inserted enough pet names into her conversations with him, it would make her more of a competent mother.

Just then, Boone heard two shrill voices screaming. "Sweetie, could you tell _Shannon_ to keep it down? And that Anna can't stay for dinner again tonight? I have a presentation in the city tonight, so I won't be home until late, okay?" He was about to tell her that she should handle her own dirty work and that he didn't deserve to be the bad guy, but Sabrina had already turned on her Gucci heels and exited the room. Boone sighed, starting upstairs to go give Shannon the message.

"Oh my god!" His step-sister shrieked as he entered her room, her blonde hair in a half-ponytail, her eyes perfectly lined with kohl and mascara, and her lips glossed like usual. "Do you know _who_ just called?" Boone tried to ignore the shape her lips made as she spoke.

"Someone called?" He wrinkled his nose, trying to act normal around her.

"Yes, didn't you hear the phone ring?" Her voice had an edge to it, and Boone didn't want her to think he was stupid, so he said that he had.

"Who was it?" He played along, always keen on pleasing his step-sister.

"Tucker!" She gasped.

"He's so _hot_," added Anna, Shannon's best friend, who looked exactly like her but with wavy auburn hair, green eyes, and more eyeliner than Shannon. Plus, she had curves, whereas Shannon did not yet. Boone smiled at her in recognition of her presence. "Don't make fun of me, _Boone_." She said in mock insult. He rolled his eyes back at her.

"And he asked me out!" Shannon exclaimed, and the second she opened her mouth, Boone's attention was immediately drawn back to her. "To a movie this Friday!"

"Wow," Boone pretended to be impressed, but his thoughts were laden with worry regarding who would be making moves on Shannon. "So who is this Tucker, anyway?"

"Scott's younger brother."

"Scott Turner?" Boone asked, thinking of the idiot who was in his grade at St. Gabriel's.

"Boone, please don't get into my business, okay?" Shannon anticipated his jealousy, or worry, or whatever the hell it was, and bit her lip, smiling charmingly at him. He wished he could take a picture of her expression and look at it whenever he wanted. It was the expression that could convince him of anything, and she knew that. "Promise?" Shannon stepped closer to him, holding out her pinky.

"You really want me to pinky swear?" Boone looked at her pink manicured fingernail incredulously. Shannon didn't budge, her face completely serious. Boone linked his pinky finger with hers, and shook.

Shannon smiled. "Good. Anna, can you come over after school on Friday to help me pick out what to wear?"

Anna grinned excitedly, but then her face fell. "Oh shit," she said, "My dad is going on a business trip to Florida and he's making my whole family go." She rolled her eyes. Anna's father was a big-time record label producer, and her mother was a socialite (okay, trophy wife), and she also had a baby brother named Adrian.

"Oh," Shannon sighed, "I guess I could ask Caitlyn or something, but she can be sorta annoying, you know?"

"Uh," Anna rolled her eyes. "Yeah, she is so…" She made an expression of frustration. "Ugh, she pisses me off! Don't you dare get like that when you get a boyfriend," Anna warned. Boone coughed, still standing in the doorway.

"Boone, what do you want?" Shannon asked coolly.

"I was supposed to tell Anna," Anna looked up, "That my mom says she can't stay for dinner." Anna looked down, frowning. "Sorry to be the bad guy."

"It's fine," Anna recovered quickly. "Bye, Shannon. See you, Boone." She squeezed past Boone in the doorway and exited the room.

"So," Shannon said.

"So," Boone repeated, "I think we're on our own for dinner again." Shannon sighed, turning the corner of her lip downward.

"I'm not hungry," she responded stubbornly, but Boone could see in her eyes that she was lying.

"Did you go to ballet today?" Boone asked. "What did she say to you now?" He referred to Pam, Shannon's ballet teacher who expected all of her students to be human cadavers.

Shannon bit her lip nervously. "Nobody said anything."

"You're lying." Boone responded stiffly. A few months before, he had stumbled in on Shannon throwing up her dinner in the bathroom, and he still couldn't get the image out of his head. How could someone as beautiful and talented stand to do something like that to herself?

"So what, Boone? I don't have to tell you everything!" Shannon exclaimed.

"I'm just trying to –" he responded.

"Look – I know you think you're all cool now because of _Claire_ or whatever, but – " Boone was insulted that Shannon had brought his girlfriend into the conversation, and that she was trying to change the subject in her own little twisted way.

"This has nothing to do with Claire! This has to do with you, starving yourself so your stupid ballet teacher turns you into a god damn skeleton!" Boone raised his voice. "Believe it or not, everything I do is not to just bother you."

"Um," Shannon stuttered, lost for words. "Pam just said that I have to lose a few pounds and she'll move me to the next level." She finished quietly. "I really want to be in the next level – it travels all over the _state_!"

Boone smiled grimly, pushing himself off of the doorway. "Is that really what she said? The second the scale reads one-ten instead of one-fifteen, you automatically move up?"

"Most of the girls are less than one-hundred pounds." Shannon insisted.

"Most of the girls are three inches shorter than you! Most of those girls are going to get osteoporosis by the time they're twenty-one!" Boone threw his arms up in annoyance, defeated. "You won't listen to me, whatever." Boone started to leave her room, but then he turned around, pleading with his step-sister, "Can't you just like, cut down on the sweets or something? I mean, don't _starve_ yourself, you're still supposed to eat dinner."

"Thanks, mom, but I think I can handle it," Shannon smirked. "Do you think you could make me some of the leftover Caesar salad from last night?" Boone tried to ignore the way that her tone changed when she segued from her sarcastic comment to asking him a favor.

"Sure," Boone smiled, relieved, and started down the stairs.

* * *

"So," Shannon smiled, laying a short denim skirt on the bed. "I could either wear this," she pointed to the skirt, "With the pink tank top, or the white one." She paused. "Or, if you think that's too summery, I could wear my Sevens with the dark green halter top." Shannon pulled a forest green halter top with straps that attached to a cutout in the shirt out of her closet, and whisked it onto the bed, where Boone was sitting, and then tying her bathrobe tighter around her waist. 

It was Friday night, and Shannon, with Anna being out of town, had resorted to Boone to help her pick out what to wear on her first date with Tucker. "This is really nice too," she noted, referring to a black tank top, "And with some color," she opened her jewelry box and pulled out a pair of pink dangly earrings and a matching necklace, "It could be perfect. Or does that look like I'm trying too hard?" She furrowed her forehead in concentration. "Are you even listening to me?"

"I liked the halter top," Boone finally said, torn because he wanted to pick out something nice for his sister, but at the same time, he didn't want Tucker to like what she was wearing _too_ much.

"With the jeans?" She asked. "Or the skirt?" Boone was about to say the jeans, because he didn't want her to look like a _total_ slut, but then Shannon decided on her own. "The skirt, definitely the skirt." She muttered to herself.

"Do you have any sweaters?" Boone hinted.

"It's like eighty degrees," Shannon pointed out.

"Yeah, but movie theaters are always really cold." He argued.

"I don't need a sweater." She laughed uncomfortably.

"Okay," Boone sighed, discouraged. "Freeze."

"I'm going to change." Shannon went into her walk in closet with the shirt and skirt and shut the door. He tried not to imagine her taking off her clothes, but was having quite a bit of trouble, listening to the zips of her clothes and the quiet thud her bathrobe made when she dropped it on the floor. Luckily, he was interrupted when she started to talk again, her voice muffled through the door of the closet. "Are you doing anything tonight, Boone?" He heard her say.

"Oh," Boone swallowed. "I think I was supposed to call Claire."

"You don't sound very happy about that," Shannon picked up the negativity in his tone.

"Maybe I'm not," he frowned, watching the door handle turn as she opened it. Truth was, he was finding that he had liked Claire a lot more when they were just friends. Sure, he liked kissing her and everything, but it always seemed pretty awkward when they went out on dates, and especially with her other friends, because Claire and Boone were both shy, and their friends expected them to act affectionate, which they usually didn't. One good thing about going out with Claire, though, is that it had introduced Boone to her group of friends, and now there were a few people who he might consider "friends". At least he didn't have to read during recess anymore.

"Why not?" Shannon stepped out of the closet door, turning around playfully. "What do you think?" She changed the subject, looking down to adjust her shirt. Boone's eyes grazed over Shannon's legs, probably for a moment too long, before answering.

"You look great," he nodded earnestly. Shannon smiled, and grabbed a large makeup bag, plopping down on the bed next to Boone. She unzipped the bag, and started to brush powder on her cheeks.

"So why aren't you happy about seeing Claire?" She asked, replacing the brush back into the bag and taking out another one, along with a container of blush. "You're so lucky you have pink cheeks, Boone," she changed the subject again, and Boone blushed, not really disproving her point.

"Not really. They make me look like a girl."

"Oh, don't be so modest. They make you look so _cute_." She smiled in spite of herself, dabbing her cheeks with the blush brush. Boone tried not to over think the compliment, although he felt the corners of his lips turning upward. Next, Shannon took out a few different colors of eye shadow. "So, about Claire…?" Well, obviously, he also didn't want to be with her because he would much rather be spending time with his gorgeous, flirty sister instead, but he didn't say that.

"I don't know. I just don't like her that much." He said.

"So are you going to break up with her?" Shannon asked, coating her eyelids with gold shadow.

"I don't know. It might be better to just not, stay with her for a little longer." Truth was, now that Shannon was dating, she might be home a lot less, and he may as well spend his time with someone else than wait at home, nervously counting the minutes until Shannon came home, and being envious.

"I guess," Shannon answered distractedly. "What time is it?" Boone peered at the clock next to her bed as she put on eyeliner.

"It's six forty-five." He told her.

"Oh my god!" She gushed. "They're coming in fifteen minutes!"

"Who's picking you up?" He asked.

"His mom," Shannon said darkly, looking seriously at Boone and then launching into a fit of giggles when she saw his expression. It was hard for Boone not to touch Shannon or tell her how adorable she was when he wanted to, especially when she was being so friendly. "But she's just dropping us off at the theater," her voice regained its normal quality, "and then his brother's picking us up."

"Hope he's not drunk," Boone muttered under his breath, referring to the impossibly stupid Scott Turner.

"What?" Asked Shannon nonchalantly.

"I said, I hope he doesn't drive a truck." Boone quickly changed his statement. Shannon wrinkled her nose in confusion, softly muttering "whatever" beneath her breath, now lining her lips in a cherry colored gloss. He tried not to pay too much attention to the round o shape her mouth made as she put on the gloss, and the sound that occurred when she smacked her lips. Finally, Shannon snapped the makeup case shut, quickly standing up and smoothing out her skirt, just in time for the doorbell to ring. Boone squinted, suddenly feeling very protective of his little sister, and he had to bite his tongue to stop himself from begging her not to go.

"Oh, I'm so nervous!" She squealed. "Bye!" She kissed Boone on the cheek, too quick a kiss for him to enjoy, and scampered down the stairs.

_Thanks for all the reviews from last chapter! Please review again and I hope you liked it! And it always helps to tell me what you liked and **didn't like. **Thanks!_


	3. Chapter 3

_**Tangled Youth**_

**Chapter 3**

After Shannon left, Boone decided to call Claire. He dialed her number, and after three rings, she picked up.

"Oh," she sounded surprised to hear Boone's voice. "Hi."

"Hey, what's wrong?" Boone asked her.

"Nothing, I'm just surprised." Claire answered.

"About what?"

"Um… do you think we could talk about something?" Claire inquired uncomfortably.

"Yeah," Boone said slowly, thinking that maybe this wasn't going to be so hard after all. "Do you want to meet somewhere?"

"It might be better over the phone," Claire decided, "Than face to face."

"Okay," Boone agreed, though he felt the opposite. Claire breathed into the phone loudly.

"So, um," she continued nervously, but then her voice dropped off into silence.

"I don't think this is working," Boone blurted out.

"D- don't think what's working?" Claire asked defensively.

"Well, isn't that what you were going to say?"

"Well, yeah, but – "

"Then what should we do?" He interrupted.

"I – I don't know." Stammered Claire in resignation.

He breathed into the receiver. Now it looked like he _was_ going to be girlfriend-less just when Shannon got a boyfriend, which would probably tempt him even more. "Well, what do you think isn't working?"

"I don't know."

"Well, you have to have some idea." He prodded.

"What do _you_ think isn't working, Boone?" Claire retorted, turning the question on him.

"I guess," he started, "I liked being friends with you better. It's like you're a different person ever since we went – "

"No," Claire suddenly interrupted. "You're the different person. I mean, when I met you, you were like, this… loser, and _now_… god, do you see how girls react when you walk into a room? Do you notice?"

"Um," He _had_ noticed, and deep down, he knew that something about him, probably his looks, made him have quite an effect on a lot of the girls at his school. But he didn't like to think about it, and usually didn't dwell on it, because it made him feel vain, and he hated that feeling more than almost anything. "I dunno, I guess." He scratched his head. "Wait, that's why you want to break up with me? Because girls think I'm… nice looking?"

"I just know you're going to cheat on me." Claire said stiffly.

"What? What does that have to – why would I cheat on you?" Boone was perplexed, this seemed completely non-sequitor.

"If Kristy Taylor came up to you and kissed you, what would you do?"

"Um – what does this have to do with anything?"

"Hypothetically! Answer the question."

"She's my lab partner!" Boone exploded. "Claire, can't you just _say_ what you mean for once?"

"She's gorgeous!" Claire continued her ridiculous scenario.

"What does this have to –"

"She thinks you're really hot. She said so in the gym lockers." Claire said this like she was sentencing him to life in prison.

"I don't like Kristy," Boone assured her, referring to the ditzy blonde in his class.

"A lot of people think you're really hot." This time, she had sentenced Boone to Death Row.

"_Claire_," he said emphatically, "What the hell are you trying to say?"

She sounded taken aback, but still kept beating around the bush. "A lot of girls flirt with you. You're polite to them, but they think you're flirting back. And they _talk_ about you."

"What do they say?"

"Why do you want to know?" She asked suspiciously.

"I don't – never mind." He ran his hand through his hair in aggravation.

"And what about that girl Anna that's always at your house?"

"Oh my _god_," Boone said, "She's my sister's best friend! Next thing, you're going to be suspicious of my mother!"

"Boone, that's not nice." She said after a pause, hurt. "I'm not being ridiculous."

"Why can't you just say what you want to say and quit going in circles?"

"Why can't you just admit you want to make out with Kristy!"

"_What_?" Boone said in complete disbelief. "When did I ever say anything like that? I don't _like_ Kristy. In fact, I dislike her, she is as annoying as hell! Almost as annoying as you're being now!"

He heard her sniffle. "Boone, why are you being so mean?"

"Claire," he said softly. "Claire, I'm sorry, I just want you to tell me what exactly you mean."

"I guess," she sniffed. "I guess I just feel threatened by them. I mean, I'm not nearly as pretty as a lot of these girls, and what they say about you, while I'm standing _right_ there, I mean, when Kristy said she wanted to give you head, I was like… I mean, _god._"

"Claire, you don't need to worry about that. I…" Boone tried desperately not to laugh, resulting in a weird chuckle/snort thing. But he somewhat successfully managed to pass it off as a sneeze. "I don't know what to tell you, but I think we should go back to being friends."

"Okay," Claire sniffled.

"Okay, Claire. I'll see you."

"Bye."

"Bye." He hung up, wondering what else Kristy Taylor had said about him.

"Boone!" Boone yawned and opened his eyes a few hours later to bright lights in his eyes and Shannon standing in front of him excitedly. He stretched and sat up on his bed.

"What?" He yawned again.

"Were you seriously asleep at –" she grabbed his wrist and looked at his watch, and then let go quickly, but Boone could still feel the warmth on his skin from where she had touched him. "9:30 on a Friday night? You _loser_."

Boone smiled. "I was just sitting here reading, and I guess I fell asleep. How was your date?"

"Oh my god!" Shannon smiled widely. "It was _so_ great! He kissed me goodnight!"

"Oh," Boone imagined himself kissing Shannon instead of that kid Tucker Turner. What kind of name was Tucker Turner anyway? Shannon sat on Boone's bed, looking up at the ceiling, still grinning.

"He was a really _good_ kisser, too." She continued, "Not too much tongue, not too little."

"How do you know? You've never French-kissed anyone before!" He hoped, surprised at his sister's audacity.

Shannon stuck her tongue out at Boone. "I have now." She said stubbornly. "So, we went to see Runaway Bride, even though I think he wanted to see something else – you know, like more boyish, but he was really sweet about it and said he would see that instead. Then, he offered to get me popcorn – I said no, but the offer was nice, and then he touched my hand during one of the sweet parts! And his mom wasn't so bad, she just asked me about my parents and I told them about Dad and I _accidentally forgot_ to mention Sabrina," Shannon smirked, "And I told her I had a brother named Boone, and she said, 'how nice'. And Scott wasn't that bad! He was with this girl, I forget her name, but she asked about _you_." Shannon poked Boone in the chest. "It was like… Kristen or Christina?"

"Kristy," Boone groaned. "Oh my god," he rolled his eyes, "What did she say?"

"She asked if I was your sister, and I said yeah. And then she asked why we had different last names and I told her we were step-siblings. And then she said you were hot, and she goes, 'So, what does your brother wear to bed?' and then Scott hit her – not like, in a mean way, just like, playfully. She seemed a little drunk."

"Was Scott drunk?" Boone instantly forgot about Kristy.

"No – god, Boone, what are you now? The spokesperson for Mothers against Drunk Driving?"

Boone laughed. "I just want you to be safe."

"Thanks," Shannon said uncomfortably. "Oh! So, what happened with you and Claire?"

"We broke up," Boone shrugged.

"Awwwww!" Shannon cooed. "What happened?"

"She thinks I'm going to cheat on her because other girls think I'm hot. Apparently."

"Oh, because that girl Kristy Taylor wants to blow you in the shower," Shannon dismissed with a wave of her hand.

"_What_?" How the hell did she know this? "How do you know this?"

"Everyone knows, it was like this huge rumor at school this week. Even Sister Sarah knows." Shannon started laughing, grabbing onto Boone for support. "_That's_ why she broke up with you?"

"Sister Sarah knows?" Great, the only thing he needed was for a bunch of celibate nuns think he was a complete pervert.

"Uh, yeah. She gave you such a dirty look on Wednesday when we were leaving school. But I think she might like you too."

"Who?"

"Sister Sarah."

"What the hell, Shannon, she's a _nun_!"

"Well, she thinks you're very charming." Shannon smiled. "She said so."

"Oh my _god_, this is so weird!" Boone exclaimed.

"Quit being such a drama queen," Shannon rolled her eyes, "What else did Claire say?"

"Well, she said a bunch of stuff that didn't make any sense to me."

"Like what?"

"She asked me if Kristy kissed me, what would I do?"

"Kristy don't wanna just kiss you, Boonie," Shannon in some weird accent.

"I know, she wants to –"

"God, I can't believe she'd dump you over such a stupid rumor."

"Well, she says that she feels threatened by other girls because they're prettier than she is."

Shannon scoffed. "Well, she should. I mean, I'd totally do Kristy over Claire."

Boone's eyes widened. "I am not _doing_ Kristy _or_ Claire."

"Boone, you're going to be sixteen in like a month," Shannon said lightly. "_Grow_ up!"

Boone rolled his eyes. "So says my fourteen year old little sister."

Shannon ignored him. "I've got ballet in the morning, so I am going to sleep. Good night!" She kissed him on the cheek, resting her lips there for a few seconds longer than usual. "Oh, and I told Kristy your cell phone number, so expect a few calls."

"_What_?" Boone exploded.

"I'm _kidding_, Boone." She kissed him on the cheek again. "'Night, Boone."

"'Night, Shannon."

_Haha, that was really fun to write! Claire is kind of a confused little person, huh? And she is NOT the Claire from Lost, but I think you guys realized this. Please review, and tell me what you like and don't like!_


	4. Chapter 4

**_Tangled Youth_**

**Chapter 4 **

It was Monday morning, and after Boone put on his uniform, he walked towards the bathroom and knocked on the door. "Shan?" No answer. "Shan?" He repeated. "I swear to god, if you're throwing up again –"he started, opening the door. But the bathroom was as empty as ever, and all he could see was the glistening tile of the floor reflecting the sunlight from the window. Boone turned around, and went towards Shannon's room. "Shannon?" He knocked on her bedroom door, but again, there was no answer. He wondered if she had possibly left already, but Shannon going to school early was about as likely as Boone turning into an elephant. Just then, Adam walked by, holding his briefcase in his hand, about to go to work. "Adam?"

"What?" Adam said into his headset attached to his cell phone, which Boone hadn't realized was on. "Hold on, Jerry – Yes, I _know_, but the persecutor – what?"

"Adam?" Boone repeated. Adam pushed the mouthpiece of the phone away from his face.

"Yes?" Adam sounded drained, with a touch of annoyance mixed into his tone.

"Have you seen Shannon?"

"Oh, shit, I told her I was going to give her some shopping money." Adam seemed to remember. "Can you tell her that - oh my god, _one second_ Jerry – tell her she can take the Amex." Adam reached into his pocket and pulled out a silver piece of plastic. "Not more than a thousand, okay?" He handed the card to Boone, who looked at it bewilderedly. Boone opened his mouth to ask about Shannon's whereabouts again, but Adam's dress shoes had already clicked the other way. "Jerry?" He continued.

"Shannon?" Boone opened the door to Shannon's room and was practically blinded by the bright pink lampshade she insisted on using. It was not only gigantic, but the lamp was also placed in the entryway of the room, and thus Boone almost ran into it every time he walked into the room. He scaled past the lamp, and the rest of the room was pastel with a creamy pink bedspread. And a yellowish carpet – Shannon looked amazing in yellow. He looked around, his eyes resting on the bed, where Shannon was curled up, the sheets tangled beneath her feet, sound asleep. Boone looked at his watch, which read – 7:30. "Shit," he muttered. "Shannon, wake up, we're going to be late!" She rolled over onto her side towards Boone, tucking her hair behind her ear.

"Nooooo," she moaned, "Five more…" she yawned. "Five more minutes."

"It's 7:30. We have to leave in fifteen minutes, Shannon." He told her, sitting down on her bed and smiling sympathetically at her. "Believe me, I don't wanna go either. I have Bio first period, and you know who sits next to me?"

Shannon giggled, drawing the sheets closer around her shoulders. "Kristy."

"And you get to see Tucker."

"I don't feel good," she whined, closing her eyes.

"You don't want to see Tucker?" Boone asked, hoping the twinge of hopefulness in his voice wasn't recognized.

"No, I do," she yawned. "I'm just tired."

"Okay, Get up."

"Noooooo," she groaned.

"I'll tickle you," he warned.

"No you won't," she responded weakly.

"Boone?" Boone suddenly heard the affected voice of his mother say harshly. "_Shannon_? Are you not awake yet? Get up, right now! Dear lord, you're almost fifteen and you still need a wake up call? I have to get to a meeting, if you aren't ready by quarter till I can't drive you. Boone, honey, when are you getting your driver's license so I don't have to take you guys to school?"

"November 16th, the day after my birthday." He told her. "Shannon, come on." He patted her shoulder. "_Up_!"

"You're not my mother," Shannon mumbled.

"_Shannon_, do you want to be grounded?" Sabrina asked sharply.

"Yeah, that'd be just great." Shannon answered sarcastically.

"Shannon, I have your dad's Amex in my pocket just waiting to be spent..." He pulled it out, whizzing it past her eyes. Shannon finally rolled out of her bed.

"Boone, go away, I have to change."

* * *

Boone tiptoed into his first period biology class approximately 30 seconds late – he hoped that Sister Sarah wouldn't notice. Luckily, he was taking role, and he was calling Carlen, Jacob, when Boone got to his seat. "Hey," whispered Kristy, smiling, her tote bag (she was too cool for a backpack, Boone suspected) currently placed on Boone's chair.

"Carlyle," Sister Sarah called out. "Boone."

"Here," he said, and then lowered his voice. "Uh, could you move your bag?" He asked Kristy politely.

"Sure," she looked up at him, amused. She bent over, and Boone noticed that her uniform button up shirt was about halfway unbuttoned, and when she bent over, he could see that she was wearing what looked like five push-up bras. He rolled his eyes, suspecting that this hadn't been unintentional. She moved her bag to the floor, putting it on the left of her chair. "So, how was your weekend?" She said loudly, drawing the attention of Sister Sarah.

"Kristy, please be quiet. And for goodness sakes, button up your shirt." She said, and Boone wanted to hug her. "Boone, sit down." Boone gladly obliged.

While Sister Sarah was giving her lesson, having them take notes, Boone was writing down something about when their next test would be when he heard a tap of fingernails against the desk. He looked up at a piece of paper (pink, of course) that was being passed to him. He opened it. In cute, round writing that annoyed the hell out of Boone, the note said, I met your little sister this weekend! She was so cute! Boone rolled his eyes, but wrote back, I know. He made sure his teacher wasn't listening, and passed it back to her. Kristy wrote something, and gave it back. Boone unfolded the paper, and added to what she had written before was, _I told her to say hi to you for me. Did she?_ Well duh, Boone thought, how else would he know? But, being the well-mannered person that he was, he wrote back, yes.

Hey, there's a party at my house this Friday. Wanna come? Oh dear lord, no.

I don't know, he wrote, I might be doing something.

Kevin is going, Kristy wrote. Kevin was Boone's best friend, even though they never really spent time together outside of school. Kevin was more extroverted than Boone, and sometimes dragged him to parties with him – maybe because Boone attracted girls, and then Kevin could make them laugh.

Oh, he wrote, Really?

Yeah, so you should come, too! She wrote, but just then, Sister Sarah looked up.

"Kristy? How about you stop writing notes and pay attention now? We all know how you feel about Boone there, but some people are trying to learn." Boone looked at the ceiling as the class laughed at him – he hated attention. Kristy on the other hand, was laughing, too, flipping her hair – unlike Boone, she loved attention, even if it was negative.

After science, Boone had world history with Kevin. Thank god, Kristy wasn't in his next class, but she felt obliged to walk with him there anyway. "So," Kristy flipped her long, obviously dyed blonde hair, and tossed her tote bag over her shoulder, brushing against Boone's arm as she did so. "Oh," she said, touching his arm again. "You have like, really nice arm muscles. Do you like, work out?"

"I run," he offered, wishing there was some nice way to get rid of her.

"Oh!" She exclaimed. "That's so sexy. Where do you run?"

"Um," he forced, trying to lie. "I dunno."

"Yeah, you do," she playfully hit his shoulder. "You're lying!"

"My class is the other way," he said loudly and obviously. Better he go around the entire school than be seen with fucking Kristy Taylor, or worse, have to endure her.

"Really? So is mine! I was just going this way because I wanted to talk to you," she blushed, flipping her hair again.

"I was kidding," he clenched his teeth. Just then, he saw Shannon walking the other direction. "I need to talk to my sister about lunch money!" He exclaimed, eager for an excuse. "Bye!" _Die, you fucking idiot_, he wanted to say. But Boone was much too polite to say a thing like that.

"Save me," he saiddesperately to Shannon when he caught up with her, not realizing that she was walking with Tucker. Shannon looked up at him, and gave him a look, gesturing to Tucker, who had brown hair and was kind of short. "Hey," he said to Tucker awkwardly.

"What did she do to you?" Shannon asked Boone. "Raped you yet?"

"No, thank god," he told her darkly, hoping Tucker wouldn't hear.

"You know, that's my brother's girlfriend, so you'd better not mess with her," Tucker said in a tough-boy voice.

"I won't," Boone smile briefly at Tucker, and then back to Shannon. "Well, I think I've lost her. Meet you in the front parking lot after school, okay?"

"Okay," Shannon said, and Boone walked the rest of his way to history class in peace, except for one awkward run-in with Claire, who mumbled, "hi," and quickened her pace. She was also in Boone's next class, which Boone was rather dreading.

"Hey," Kevin said to Boone when he got into history. "Did you hook up with Kristy Taylor?" He exclaimed loudly. The whole class turned around, taking notice.

"No," he said in a similarly outdoor voice.

"Inside voices," whispered Sister Beatrice. Sometimes, four foot nine nuns were the scariest type of human being in existence. Even the way she said, 'inside voices', like a kindergarten teacher might say, was intimidating.

"Sorry," he reprimanded, sitting in his seat in front of Kevin. "No, I didn't," he told Kevin quietly, "She's fucking annoying though, and she's been following me around all day."

"She's hella fine, though." Kevin answered absently.

"She's okay," Boone allowed.

"Did you hear the rumor? She wants to bl – "

"I know, I know," he shushed Kevin, as class was about to start. But Kevin, as usual, took little notice.

"Hell, if someone like that wanted to blow me, I'd sure let her," he whispered. "And she's throwing herself all over you." Boone smiled tightly, hoping no one was listening. Claire looked over at him, but when she noticed that he was looking back at her, she turned away, suddenly looking very interested in the history of the Magna Carta.

"Even if I did like her, I just broke up with Claire, and – " Boone whispered back.

"You didn't even get to second base with Claire!" He answered hoarsely. Boone rolled his eyes. Kevin could be obnoxious sometimes. "I mean, you've probably gone further with your sister than her!" Boone looked at him, stung. The comment rung way too close to home.

"Kevin, be quiet!" Sister Beatrice whipped off her glasses, livid. Kevin looked extremely frightened, and immediately stopped talking.

* * *

"She is so freaking scary," Kevin was saying that day at lunch as they sat on the steps in front of the school. "I mean, one time I forgot to turn in something, and she showed up at my house to tell me! Isn't that illegal or something?" He would have responded, but just then Anna walked by.

"Hey," she smiled warmly.

"Hi," he responded. Anna stepped around Kevin on the steps.

"So, I heard about your Kristy problem. God, that sucks. No, actually, it blows." She smirked, and continued walking. Turning around, she stopped and finished, "That girl may be annoying as hell, but I'll give one thing to her, she sure knows how to spread a rumor!"


	5. Chapter 5

**_Tangled Youth _**

**Chapter 5**

His feet crossed the starting line for what felt like the hundredth time, and even in the late afternoon, the sun still beat down on him, causing sweat to roll down his neck. He was sixteen now, and currently at the track at the community college near his house, using its facilities to run in solitude. Boone hated gyms, he hated the message they spread, and he especially hated that everyone was paying attention to everyone, and that he was in silent competition with the chubby girl doing dumbbells on his left or the older guy on the treadmill on his right. And since he wasn't one of the fastest runners, spending time on the track in the evening when no one else was there was his only way to get exercise. Also, it was a time where Boone could collect his thoughts in peace, and think about his life without distractions. Sometimes he ran on the track with Kevin to keep him company, but he found that it was much more peaceful alone and he didn't have to care about how fast he was going.

Maybe if Boone had a real father, they could run together – or do other father-son type things. He wondered if his father even knew that Boone existed, or if he and his mother ever spoke. Or, he thought in horror, maybe Sabrina didn't know who the father was, but Boone didn't think his mother had ever been that type of person. He rounded the bend on the track again, letting his mind continue to wander. Would he ever get to meet his father? And if he did, would he even want to talk with him? Had Boone passed him in the street dozens of times without even knowing it, and was his father thinking the same thing about him? Or did he have a family of his own now?

It really was unacceptable, Boone considered, that his mother hadn't told him anything. For God sakes, he _was_ sixteen years old. As anger welled up inside of him, the soles of his shoes hit the turf beneath him with more force – he was almost an adult and his mother still insisted on treating him like a child. Somehow, he reasoned, he was going to get information from his mother about his father. He was sick of people asking questions – "Where did you get those big blue eyes from?" and "Why is your mother blonde and why do you have brown hair?" But the worst ones were the ones whispered to him with a smirk that subtly insulted him or his mother, like, "How are you so mellow when your mother is so uptight?" But Boone never had an answer, he would just smile politely and change the subject, shrugging. As a response, he would get a blankly sympathetic look, and the questioner would turn around, looking uncomfortable. And Boone hated making people feel uncomfortable.

As the sun began to set, Boone stopped running, catching his breath and sitting down on the bleachers, drinking water out of his water bottle. Someone had once told Boone that the best part of exercising was stopping, and they were sure as hell right. But it was late, and Boone had to go home and write an essay for history – due tomorrow. And he _had_ to do well, as there was so much pressure in junior year… this was the school year that the colleges looked at when you applied, he knew, as his mother reminded him during practically every conversation they had.

When he got home, after showering, he got straight to work on his essay, becoming so engrossed that he didn't even notice when Shannon walked past, clad in a leotard from her ballet class, attached at the lips to her asthma inhaler. He also didn't notice that Adam wasn't home for dinner again, and each of the members of the Rutherford/Carlyle residence ended up eating separately – Boone in front of his computer, Sabrina in her office while talking to a client on the phone, and Shannon probably not at all. He was just about to press "print" when he had completed the essay to the best degree possible, spell-checking the document about five times, when he sensed Shannon walking up behind him. She was standing behind the computer chair, and he could see her reflection on the flickering screen of his computer – she had a blanket wrapped around herself and was eating a container of fat free yogurt, her hair down, lying in messy clumps around her shoulders. Before Boone had any time to react, Shannon wrapped her arms around him, placing her head on his shoulders. "I don't feel good," she murmured, and Boone noted that she smelled like vomit, but Boone could tell it was the flu, and not her eating disorder, kicking in.

"What's wrong?" He asked her, clicking okay on the print menu. The printer made a printer-like noise, the kind that Shannon always said sounding like a choking baby, and started to print his paper.

"I think I'm sick," she whispered in his ear, and he tried not to shiver. "I threw up because… I was nauseous and dizzy."

"Well you should probably go to bed," he turned around so that he was facing Shannon, and he looked seriously at the slight, pale figure, holding a spoon rather pathetically in her right hand, the half eaten container of Yoplait in her left hand. Shannon pouted, shaking her head, and shuffling in her slippers towards the living room. Seconds later he heard the television clicking on, and he stapled his paper, clipping it into his binder, and went upstairs to reread the chapter from _Wuthering Heights_ his teacher had assigned, just in case there was a pop quiz the next day. Afterwards, stripping down to boxers and a gray t-shirt, he tucked himself in, flipping his lights out and rolling over, waiting patiently for Shannon's impending arrival.

The truth was, Boone loved it when Shannon got sick. When she got sick, more often than most people, she was incredibly weak – maybe her asthma made the flu seem like pneumonia, or maybe Shannon was just melodramatic. For some reason though, she would seek solace from Boone, and on the night when she started feeling sick, she would go to Boone's bed and was a permanent fixture in his bedroom until she got better. Sabrina tried to prevent this pattern, but not even she would dare wake a sick, sleeping girl delicately wrapped in a blanket – and David wouldn't let her disturb her either. After the fever worse off (Boone hardly ever caught it, or he pretended he hadn't and dragged himself to school sick), Sabrina would scold Shannon, telling her to stay in her own bed the next time she got sick, and Shannon would nod agreeably, simply to fall into her old habits the next time fever struck.

Now, he was used to this happening, but the novelty hadn't worn off. She appeared in his doorway, sans yogurt this time, and the long shadow she cast on the ground made her appear even smaller than she was in comparison. He barely breathed when she slowly moved the comforter and slid under it, grabbing his arm before replacing the blankets back around her. He sighed, barely whispering, "You okay?" She didn't respond, just sunk her head into the place where his neck tapered into his shoulder, breathing steadily into his ear, although she was clearly congested. He tried desperately not to shiver, but she inched closer to him - her hair fanned over his collarbone, her sweating hand clasped into his. Her soft breasts pressed into his spine, her thighs touched his lower back, and her bare feet were cold and clammy against his. There was no point in trying to hide the reactions his body was having – reactions that hadn't _always_ been there. He was sure she noticed, even though he was facing the wall and she was against his back, mainly, except for one leg she had draped under his left leg and over his right – the damn leg that was making him hard, he though, annoyed, and wondered if she was doing it on purpose. But Boone tended to overanalyze everything having to do with Shannon.

During the night, she clung to him, anxiously climbing her fingers up his back, but it took him hours to fall asleep, just being the presence of his gorgeous sister, the subject of his guiltiest desire – oh god, how he loved her to death. And when he finally fell asleep in stunted, short bursts of sleep, he dreamt that this wasn't his sister who had fallen into his bed, ill, because his room was closer from the living room than hers, but that she was his devoted girlfriend, or wife, exhausted after a party or a long night of sex. But he was disturbed from his reverie each time she moved, flinging her arms over his chest in her sleep, practically on top of him, forcing him to lie on his back. He _knew_ she felt it now, the not so subtle hints of his erection, and tried not to make a sound when she seemed to nestle herself further into him. She also kicked the sheets off of the bed a few times, only to wake up a few minutes later, sniffling in frustration as she tried to put the sheets back on again. But any annoyances that this might cause Boone were averted when she cuddled into him again afterwards, falling asleep almost instantly in him arms.

When his alarm woke him up at quarter till seven the next morning, Shannon yawned, barely opening her eyes, and scooted towards the wall, burrowing into his comforter as he climbed over her and out of the bed. She moaned, covering her ears with each side of the pillow, and he quickly shut off the alarm. "Boone-I-think-I'm-gonna-stay-home-today," she mumbled, like it was all one word.

"Do you want anything to – " he started to ask her if she wanted something to eat as he put on his pants over his boxers.

"No," she interrupted. "How about you cut first and stay here with me?" She asked, finally opening her eyes.

"'Can't, Shan, I have an essay due." He answered regretfully.

Her face fell, but she had another idea. "What do you have last period 'gain?" she garbled, and Boone pointed thought to himself that he knew her schedule backwards and forwards, shouldn't she know his as well?

"P.E." was all he said as he took off the gray t-shirt and quickly replaced it with his school uniform shirt.

"Skip it," she ordered. "I need you," her voice softened.

"But –" he looked at Shannon's pleading eyes, and realized that one cut, for P.E. no less, wouldn't hurt him – Mr. Davison probably wouldn't even notice! "Okay," he said. "Okay."

"Remember to pick up Anna for the carpool," Shannon reminded. "She wants to hook up with you, you know," she said nonchalantly.

"What!" Boone stopped buttoning his shirt midway, surprised – he knew Anna liked him, but not as more than a friend… although she did seem to go out of her way to talk with him.

"Go for it, Boone, you know you want her," Shannon yawned. "Virgin," she coughed, turning over.

"Hey!" Boone exclaimed. "So are you!" Boone was afraid of her reaction, because it was a fairly sensitive issue – her ex-boyfriend Tucker had broken up with her for not wanting to go very far with him.

"Yeah, but you're seventeen," she mumbled.

"So? It's not that old." Boone sighed in relief almost audibly that she hadn't gotten offended and continued to button his shirt, straightening out the collar.

"For someone who has friggin' groupies, it is," she retorted, sneezing, and reached for the tissue box on his nightstand.

Boone rolled his eyes. "Whatever, Shannon. I need to go get ready." Kissing her on the forehead and tucking her in again, he grabbed his _Wuthering Heights_ book and left the room, closing the door partway behind him and going into the bathroom to wash his face.

"Boone?" Sabrina burst into the bathroom without knowing.

"Mom, couldja knock?" He asked, rolling his eyes. Luckily, he wasn't going to the bathroom or anything.

Sabrina waved a pedicured hand across her face dismissively, "Sorry, honey. Where's Shannon?"

"She's sick, she – " But Boone didn't get to finish his sentence, because Sabrina was already headed towards Boone's room – she knew where to find Shannon. Boone gulped, hoping that Sabrina wouldn't yell at Shannon, but didn't hear any screaming, so he picked up his hairbrush and started combing his hair.

After shoving a piece of toast down his throat and brushing his teeth in record time, Boone grabbed his keys off the kitchen counter, called goodbye to his mother and Shannon, and jumped into his car, stepping on the gas and heading to Anna's house.

Anna smiled brightly when she saw him drive up. He noticed that she had been waiting in the driveway for him, and he hoped that she hadn't had to wait long. Maybe it was because he felt guilty, or maybe it was because he knew that she had a crush on him, but Boone found himself getting out of the car and holding the door open for her.

"And I thought chivalry was dead," she smirked as she stepped into the passenger seat. After he walked around the back of the car and sat back in the driver's seat, he sat down as well, putting on his seatbelt and starting the ignition back up. "You're so sweet, Boone," Anna continued. "I have _never_, in my entire fucking life, had a guy hold the door open for me!" She craned her head towards the backseat. "Hey, where's Shannon?"

"She's sick," Boone said, tapping his fingers on the steering wheel as he drove.

"Aw, what's wrong with her?"

"Um, I'm not sure – probably the flu or a virus or something."

"Did she sleep in your bed last night?" Anna asked casually.

"Um," Boone gulped. "She does that when she's sick, I dunno why." He tried to play it cool, shrugging.

"I know, she told me you make her less lonely." Anna responded, but before he had time to react, she stomped her foot on the floor of the car. "Shit! Shannon was supposed to come to this party with me tonight! Fuck, now she can't!" She sighed, but then she looked at Boone questioningly. "You wanna come with me?"

Boone clicked his tongue. "Um," he said. "Shannon might want me to stay with her, but if she's feeling okay, then sure."

"Okay," Anna answered, smiling. "Just call me when you find out. Do you have my cell phone number?"

"No," he said, pulling into the parking lot of their school. He found a parking spot and turned off the ignition as Anna fumbled through her bag, and pulled out a black pen.

"Here," she said, and grabbed Boone's wrist. She leaned over, and began to write the digits of her cell phone number on his hand. "Okay?" She pulled back, cocking her head.

"Yeah," Boone looked up at her. "I'll call you."

_Yay! I hope you liked it, I like it a lot better than the last chapter. Please review, thanks for reading! Also, for those who don't know, there is a new Shoone forum called Shoone Lives On. Since I'm not allowed to put links in documents on this website, I'll put "dot com" instead of .com, but just know it's not really "dot com", lol. k, it's s15.invisionfree dot com/ShooneLivesOn/index dot php._


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6 **

Boone was surprised that a police squad didn't come and arrest him for cutting class when he drove his car out of the parking lot at quarter after two that afternoon. When he got home, both Sabrina and Adam were at work, and everything seemed oddly silent. But when he opened the door to his room, Shannon was still there – curled up and sound asleep in a t-shirt and underwear. Boone wrapped his arms around her, kissing her cheek, and closed his eyes.

"Boone," she murmured. "What time is it?"

Boone opened his eyes. "It's about two twenty," he answered. "Did I wake you up?"

"No," she said.

"Feeling any better?" He asked, concerned.

"No," Shannon coughed. "I've been sleeping all day, but I got up once to go throw up."

"Aw, I'm sorry. Well, is it okay if I stay here with you until eight and then go out?"

Shannon sniffed. "Where would _you_ want to go out?"

"Well, you were supposed to go to that party with Anna – "

"Oh, right," Shannon groaned. "I can't go!"

"Yeah, I know, so Anna asked if I wanted to go with her."

"Oh," Shannon responded slowly, and Boone thought for a flickering moment she might be jealous. "You'll stay with me until eight?"

"Yeah, of course."

"Alright," Shannon turned over, and was almost instantly asleep. A few minutes later, Boone carefully unwrapped his arms from her, and scooted off of the bed, grabbing his cell phone off of the bedside table. He took the phone and went down the hall, sure not to wake his sleeping sister, and dialed the number written on his wrist.

"Hello?" Anna answered on the second ring.

"Hi, it's –"

"Oh, hey, Boone! I was looking for you after school, where were you?" Anna exclaimed.

"Oh, uh, I sort of cut my last class," he admitted.

"Naughty, naughty," she chided playfully.

"Yeah, that's me." He joked. "But anyway, I'm calling about the party, and I can go."

"Wait, sorry, I have bad reception… shit," The phone started to crackle. "Let me walk somewhere else, there's a nun down the hall who had a mind to kill…" Boone laughed. "Okay, sorry, was that an apostrophe 't' or no apostrophe 't'?"

"Huh?"

"Did you say you _can _or you _can't _come?"

"_Can_,"

"_Can_?"

"Yeah. When should I pick you up? How about a little after eight?"

"Okay, that's sounds great," she cooed. "This is going to be so fucking fun, Boone!"

"Okay," Boone smiled – it wasn't Shannon, but it was close enough, he thought. And Anna was cute and funny, he liked her just fine. "So what kind of party is this?"

"Typical high school party," he could hear the sarcasm in her voice.

"Whose house is it at?" He asked.

"Uh… what's her name? Kristy? She's in your grade."

"Oh shit," Boone said.

"Oh shit is _right_," Anna remembered. "Don't worry, I'll tell her to keep her hands off."

Boone chuckled. "You want to be my bodyguard as well?"

"Um, hell yes," she giggled. "We need _someone_ to protect poor, innocent Boone from the masses, may as well be me, I guess." It was Boone's turn to laugh. "I'm not dressing like a bailiff or anything, though."

"Fine by me," Boone said.

"Boone?" Shannon called from his bed. "Could you get me some water?"

"Sure, one second!" Boone covered the mouthpiece of his phone with his hand. "Sorry, I gotta go." He said back into the receiver.

"Uh huh," she answered distractedly. "See you tonight at… eightish."

"Okay, bye."

"Bye," she hung up.

* * *

"So you don't go to many parties, do you?" Anna asked as they drove to Kristy's house that night. She was wearing a lot of sparkly eye shadow and mascara, and a cropped halter tank top and tight jeans – Boone thought she looked totally hot, especially because her facial expressions and features were a lot like Shannon's.

"No, not really," he answered. Truth was, during his entire high school career so far, he had only been to a few parties – they just weren't his thing.

"I go to a lot of parties," Anna said, "Sometimes I go by myself, but then it's just a bunch of perverts who want to get into my pants –" Boone snorted, this sounded like something Shannon would say. "_What_? Anyway, it's fun to go with Shannon, too."

"Aw," he joked. "Hopefully I'll do."

"Wait, I'm not finished. What I was _going_ to say –"

"Before you were so rudely interrupted?" Boone interrupted.

"Before I was so rudely interrupted," she stressed, "I was going to say that it's really fun to go with a boy, like especially fun, because it's like a big hands off sign to all the pervs that want to get into my pants."

"Well, I'm glad to know I mean that much to you." He said dryly.

Anna smiled. "Oh, fuck! Turn right here!" She directed him when they reached a fork in the road.

"Okay," he quickly turned the steering wheel, and the tires skidded a little on the ground as he turned sharply.

"Damn teenage drivers," Anna shook her head, laughing under her breath.

"Should be taken off the road," Boone continued, imitating an old person's voice, driving down a street with a bunch of huge houses and lawns.

"It's like, the fifth on the left. Number 31," she said. Boone craned his head as he drove slower. "It's not this one, or this one… oh! There it is!" In front of a gigantic cream colored house were a bunch of cars, and some people sitting on the steps in front of it. Boone carefully parked in the street – parallel parking was still not his favorite thing about driving.

"So, Anna," he said as he unbuckled his seatbelt. "How old are you?"

"I'll be sixteen in a week," she said. "You?"

"I'm seventeen," he told her.

"Good! Its not illegal!" She sighed exaggeratedly. "You had me _so_ worried there for a second." He smiled, and shut his door, walking around the car, opening her door for her. She held her hand out, and he took it, helping her stand up. "Thanks," she said. "I could get used to that. You're going to spoil me, Boone!" She joked.

"So," he said as they walked towards the path.

"So," she repeated. "Oh, can you be the driver?"

"Sure," he answered, not really understanding what she was getting at.

"Right, so let's talk about the GP."

"The what?" He asked.

"The Game Plan, duh. Plan Keep Kristy's Hands Off Of Boone." Boone laughed.

"It's not that big a deal," he said, "I haven't talked to her in months."

"The girl is a fucking _whore_," Anna told him, "It doesn't matter if she's never talked to you – without my protection, six seconds from now you could be blindfolded and tied to her bed." She warned.

"Oh my _god_," Boone rolled his eyes. "Thanks for that disturbing image, Anna."

"Hi!" He heard the squeaky, probably wasted, voice of Kristy Taylor greet them as they reached the door.

"Oh, h –" Boone started, but Kristy had already grabbed him and wrapped him in a tight, disturbing hug.

"Oh my god, you're so fucking sexy," Kristy slurred.

"Hey – " he heard Anna interrupt, but Kristy ignored her.

"Kristy, get off of me," Boone told her in as polite a voice as possible.

"Oh come on," Kristy whined. "Do you wanna dance? C'mon, let's go dance." She started dragging him towards the middle of the room.

"Kristy!" Anna screamed, tearing her away from Boone. Kristy opened her mouth extremely wide in shock, making her look like a frightened fish. But the expression was wiped off her face when she saw some of her other friends. "Oh my god!" She squealed, running towards her friends.

"Thanks," Boone blushed. "_Someone's_ a little drunk."

"Wanna dance?" Anna asked Boone, grabbing his hand. Boone looked around at thecrowd of scantily clad girls, some drunk and dancing around, others drunk and talking, and a select few looking miserable in the corner. He also recognized some boys from his school, who were either drunk or talking, or drunk and grinding with said drunk girls. God, Boone hated parties. But Anna was looking at him expectantly.

"Sure," Boone said, but he suddenly felt an ache in his chest, and then he realized that he missed Shannon.

"Okay, wait, lemme get something to drink first." Boone followed Anna towards the drinks table, and she grabbed his hand again so that he didn't lose her. Anna handed Boone a beer and opened one for herself. "You only get _one_," she told him, smiling, "Because you're the driver." Boone nodded in realization, and opened it, taking a sip as she chugged hers down and chucked it into the nearest trash can. Boone's eyes widened, hoping that she wouldn't get as drunk as Kristy was. He breathed a sigh of relief when she didn't take another drink. Boone set down his own drink after only a few sips, and Anna dragged him onto the dance floor.

Some loud, random rap song was playing, and Anna stood in front of him, grinding against him. He had freaked with plenty of girls at school dances before, but for some reason, this was different. First of all, this was his sister's best friend, and secondly, he was in love with said sister. But he tried to ignore the reddish brown hair that fell in loose waves down Anna's shoulders, and pretended they were blonde, and he could, without much trouble, imagine Shannon here instead. He put his hands on her waist and got more into it.

A few minutes later, Anna broke away, and he followed her back to the drink table, where she had a shot and took another beer, and sat on a couch somewhere, beckoning for Boone to join her. "Want some?" She tipped the beer towards his lips, and he took a sip. Then she took it back and took a long drink from it, smiling flirtatiously, and scooted a little closer to him. It might have been the little bit of beer he'd had, but he found himself loosely draping his arm around her. "You know," she told him, "I've had a crush on you since eighth grade."

"Really?" He asked, "I didn't know."

"Well, now you do. Hold on, I'm thirsty." She stood up, but Boone pulled her back.

"Don't you think you've had enough?"

Anna smirked. "Oh, I'm just getting started."

"O- kay," he said to himself after she left. It was actually very Shannon of her to say that, he decided. Anna came back a few minutes later with another beer. "Hey, Anna, do you wanna go outside?"

"Yeah," she said, grabbing his hand again and dragging him onto the porch. "Ah, I can actually breathe out here."

"I _know_, well, as best as you can with all this L.A. smog."

"I guess. It's still nice, though." She set her beer on the railing of the porch, and leaned against it. He followed suit.

"Wow, they're right on the beach," he referred to the sand that lay within feet of them.

"Yeah, you'd almost thing we weren't living in materialistic wasteland," she smirked. "But it's not so bad." Boone looked at Anna. She really was gorgeous, in an edgy, sexy way, and her lips looked exactly like Shannon's. Plus, she was funny and enjoyable to be with, and she _liked_ him.

"_This_ isn't so bad," he said, inching his hand towards hers. _What the hell_? He thought. Then he kissed her.

* * *

When Boone got home, a little later than he planned, thanks to some valuable time spent making out in Anna's driveway, his mother was in the kitchen, micro waving coffee. He expected her to yell at him about his curfew, but what she said was entirely unanticipated. "Why is Shannon in your room again?"

"She's sick."

"Yeah, sick to be sleeping with her brother – "

"Mom, don't use that phrasing," He smirked.

"Don't be cute, _sweetheart_. What I'm trying to say," Sabrina smiled malevolently, "Is that I want her out of your room by tomorrow."

"Okay," Boone responded, just to get her off of his back, and started towards the stairs.

"And one more thing," Sabrina called him back. "Sit down." Boone, feeling extremely tired, but a little buzzed at the same time, obeyed his mother, just like he always did. "The thing about Shannon," Sabrina compulsively cleaned a coaster on her sweater before placing it on the table to put her coffee mug on, "Is that she's very manipulative." Boone rolled his eyes. He had heard this all a million times before. "And Boone, honey, you baby her. And all that's going to do is make things… complicated, and reinforce her behavior."

"Uh huh," Boone answered distractedly. "Wait, what? I don't _baby_ her. What the hell do you mean by that?"

"Don't use that kind of language, _sweetheart_. What I mean, is that you treat her like a puppy."

"A _puppy_?" Boone repeated, thinking this was the stupidest thing he had ever heard.

"Boone, hon, let me explain. When puppies are young, sometimes their owners spoil them, but that isn't good for the dog, because once they get larger, they're untrained, and expect to continue to be spoiled – to be allowed to eat from the table, and jump on people, but – "

"Well, I'll be sure to make sure Shannon doesn't jump on people, then," Boone sneered, smiling disdainfully.

"Fine, Boone. I try to talk to you, and all I get is – and where have you been? At some crackpot party you didn't _ask_ if you could go to? Don't you have work to do? This is the year that colleges look at, and if you want to get into UCLA or NYU, that's where you told me you wanted to go, right?"

"USC, actually," he rolled his eyes at his mother's incompetence to remember something so simple. "And yeah, NYU."

"If you want to go there, you need high grades and extracurricular – "

"Which is why I did the lifeguard thing, _Mother_."

"Uh huh…" Suddenly, Sabrina's expression changed. "You smell like beer. Have you been drinking?"

Boone rolled his eyes again. "No, Anna was."

"Anna was drinking? You were with _Anna_? Are you dating her now?"

"Um, all of the above?" He answered.

"I don't want you hanging around with people who drink, Boone." Sabrina twisted her fingers around the handle of her coffee mug.

"Then I guess I shouldn't be hanging out with you, mom."

"Ugh," Sabrina simpered, "_Quit_ being rude to me! I am your mother, and you _will_ respect me!" Boone nodded. "Are you having sex with her?"

"No," he sighed.

"You-sound-disappointed-about-that-are-you-disappointed-about-that?" Sabrina asked in one word.

"_No_," he said, "Can I just go to bed now?"

"_Fine_," Sabrina waved her arm dismissively. "Do whatever the hell you want, just don't think about my feelings," Sabrina sniffled in a fake sounding way. "If you smell like alcohol again, or if I find out you're misbehaving again… you _will_, I'm serious, you _will_, be punished." Boone was already in his room by the time Sabrina finished her sentence.

"Hey," Shannon whispered from his bed. "What's wrong with the step-monster?"

Boone went into the closet and changed into his pajamas quickly. "I dunno." He told her, lying down next to her. He kissed her cheek. "Goodnight."

"'Night," she murmured, cuddling into him. "You smell like beer and Seductive Sunset #3," she told him. "That's Anna's perfume."

"Yeah," Boone answered. "Go to sleep." She was asleep in his arms less than a minute later.

_Wow, I updated fast this time! I was just in a big writing mood last night and I wrote two chapters, the one I udpated yesterday and this one. Please review! _


	7. Chapter 7

**_Tangled Youth_**

**Chapter 7**

One morning, Boone was opening the cupboard to find a bowl for his cereal when Shannon came up around him, grabbing a piece of fruit from the counter, holding it in one hand and slapping his ass with the other. "'Morning, gorgeous," she told him. _Okay, now what the hell was that_, Boone thought.

Uh… Shannon?" Shannon looked up. "What was that?"

"Nothing. I just miss you, that's all, now that you're always with Anna and stuff," Shannon bit her lip. "I like those pants. They make your ass look good," she told him.

"These are my uniform pants. I wear them every day." Boone tried to hide a smile, but it was proving rather difficult. It wasn't every day that the girl of his dreams showered him with compliments.

"You wear those every day?" She asked in disbelief. "No, those are new. Those _have_ to be new." Shannon leaned across him, trying to open the drawer in front of him to get a spoon, and Boone could feel her body heat as her shirt sleeve brushed against his wrist. Boone thought, and realized that they were new. His dress code entailed their school shirt and khakis, but it didn't specify any specific kind of khakis.

"I guess they are new. Mom bought them."

"Your mommy still shops for you?" She smiled, still standing quite close to him. "That's _so cute_!" She mimicked. "Who am I?"

"Uh… Anna?" Boone guessed.

"She will _not_ stop talking about you. She is like, madly in love with you. I don't know why. I mean, to me you'll always just be my idiot brother." To prove her point, or torment Boone, or both, she stood on her tiptoes and kissed Boone lightly on the lips. She backed away and scampered to the kitchen table, sitting down. Boone stood in the middle of the kitchen, touching his lips, utterly and completely confused.

"Oh my _god_," Shannon rolled her eyes, still imitating Anna. "I love you Boone, god, I love you _so fucking much_!"

"Shannon, stop, you're being mean." Boone looked at her, frowning, but he knew that even though Shannon was imitating Anna, her words would still echo through his brain for the rest of the day.

"What_ever_," Shannon responded. "But don't you think it's a little pathetic? That she's like that?" Shannon kicked her legs onto the chair across from her, exposing more than a little thigh from where her skirt had rode up her leg. Boone gulped. He wished he could just grab Shannon and touch her bare foot, lingering his hand there, caress her leg, and run his handsalong the inside of her thigh, but he would never be able to do that. He mentally scolded himself for thinking such dirty things about someone who was practically related to him. Shannon smiled at him, almost knowingly, and Boone looked down, hoping desperately that she wasn't catching on.

"So Boone," Shannon said, "Have you done –" Just then, Sabrina walked in, her black pumps making clicking sounds on the marble tiling of the kitchen. "Have you taken the SAT yet?" She corrected herself.

"Uh, yeah," he rolled his eyes. She knew he had taken it last weekend! "I'm going to go brush my teeth."

"Me too," Shannon said, leaving the peel of her tangerine on the table and following Boone upstairs. Once they reached the stairwell, Shannon grabbed his arm, leaning close to him, and whispered, her lips hovering over his ear, "I was going to ask you whether or not you had fucked Anna yet." Boone jerked away from her.

"Shannon! What the hell is wrong with you today?" He practically yelled. First the flirting, then the suggestion – it was only going to be so long before he wouldn't be able to keep his hands off of her.

"What? You haven't, have you?" Boone started up the stairs past her. "Because she's getting pretty impatient. If you don't do it soon, people will start talking," she followed him, raising her voice a little bit. "Some people think you're gay!" _If I was gay, I wouldn't want to have sex with my sister_, he thought savagely, reaching the bathroom and shutting the door behind him. He opened the medicine cabinet, pulling out his toothbrush and a container of toothpaste, and brushing his teeth rather violently. God, he hated her. She pounded on the door of the bathroom. "Let me guess what you're doing, Boone. I bet I _know_ what you're doing," she sing-songed.

"Shannon!" He yelled, putting down the toothbrush. "Would you quit being the sadistic bitch that you are, and leave me the fuck alone, because I am brushing my teeth, okay?"

"Okay," she sighed, sounding hurt.

"I think it's really low that you're making fun of her. I mean, she's your best friend." He said, their true feelings hidden by the solidity of the door.

"I just.. I mean, these last couple of weeks… for god's sake Boone, open the damn door!" Boone opened the door a crack, and found it much more difficult to be mad at her now that he was looking at her smooth blonde hair, her round amber eyes, her soft lips, and all of the curves of her body.

"What?" He asked, his voice softening.

"These past few weeks, with you and Anna and everything… I mean, don't you understand how it would be a little weird for me? You're like, my brother, and she's my best friend, and I'm not sure if I like that you're together, but I can't do anything about it and I _have_ to support it because… you know?"

"Yeah, I know." He answered, not sure that he did. Was Shannon jealous of his relationship with Anna? "So, you don't like us together?"

"I don't know," Shannon looked uncomfortable. "I don't know – look, I need to get in there and get my hairbrush, okay?" Shannon's voice adopted a cool, detached tone as she spoke, all traces of the intimacy existing in her tone seconds before completely gone. Shannon bent down, and Boone moved aside so that she could reach under the sink into the cabinet below to get her hairbrush, and her skirt rode up in the back when she did so. When she stood up again, Boone decided that if Shannon was allowed to flirt with him, then hell, so could he.

He tugged on the bottom of the skirt, smiling and asked, "How do you get away with wearing that skirt so short?"

Shannon let him play with the fabric, leaning towards him and said, "Well, when one of the teachers asks me why my skirt's too small, I just tell them that I can't afford to buy another one…" she stumbled over her words when he touched the side of her thigh.

"Uh huh?" He beckoned for her to continue, delicately pinching the side of her leg .

"And… they know I'm lying, but they can't tell me so because… god, _stop_," she giggled, and he pulled back shamefully. What the hell had he been thinking? He _had_ a girlfriend, and this was his sister! But even though the surface of his brain thought that he had made a mistake, there were flickers of pride sparking in his head – she had reacted so well! "Anyway," she was saying, "It would be so completely un-politically correct to just tell me I was lying… especially when it's about money." She bit her lip, seeming to realize that her back was against the sink, and he was facing her, and they were standing so close he could have kissed her. He laughed uncomfortably, and moved away. "I need to – " Shannon motioned to the toilet. "I need to use the toilet… can you –"

"Yeah," he answered awkwardly, leaving the bathroom and shutting the door behind him. That was when he noticed a strange vibration near his pocket. It was his cell phone. "Hello?" He answered.

"Hi, baby, I just wanted to tell you that you don't have to pick me up because I'm going to an audition thing." Anna said. Since when did going out for less than a month entail being called 'baby'?

"What's the audition for?"

"Oh, it's like this modeling thing," Anna said. "For a magazine," Anna sounded proud. "My agent guy just called me and said they were looking for an… attractive, brunette 15-18 year old to advertise this new swimsuit brand for a print ad. Isn't that awesome?"

"Well, I hope you get it."

"Yeah, me too!" She breathed. "I'll come over after school when I find out! I gotta go! Bye!" Boone hung up.

"Hey, Shan?" He said, walking back towards the bathroom and opening the door without thinking. Shannon was currently brushing her teeth, clad in only a thong and her shirt. She looked up at him in shock.

"Oh my _god_," She rolled her eyes. "Knock, asshole." And a door slammed in his face. It was an interesting start to a _very_ interesting day.

* * *

That evening, Boone was sitting at his desk starting to fill out the application for one of the colleges he wanted to go to when the doorbell suddenly rang. He stood up, leaving the packet of papers and his pencil lying on the table, and started downstairs to answer the door. The second he opened the door, he was almost knocked over by Anna, who jumped into his arms and instantly started kissing him. He kissed back, but after a second, he pulled away, laughing, and asked her, "What's – " but Anna interrupted him, hoisting herself up by wrapping her arms tighter around his neck.

"I got it!" She squealed, letting go of him and hopping back onto the floor as Shannon walked into the entry way holding a pair of silver sling-backs and wearing a halter dress. It looked amazing on her, and clung to every curve as if it had been made for her.

"Got what? Did you get the job?" Shannon asked, dropping the shoes and going over to hug her friend.

"Yeah, I got it! And the guy said that I'm very talented! I'm going to be in an article about getting a 'bikini body' in this teen magazine, and _I_ am the bikini body, apparently!" She bragged, but her face was glowing with pride, so it was impossible to think she was being a brat.

"I'm really proud of you," Boone said to Anna. "We should go out to celebrate, don't you think?"

"Uh huh, we should! Oh my fucking god, I can barely breathe! Just imagine, when the thing comes out, you can show your friends and everyone you fucking know, and you can say, 'That's _my_ girlfriend!'"

"Yeah, I know," He answered, smiling.

"Do you want to get hamburgers? I feel like getting something fattening for my 'bikini body'!" She exclaimed, wrapping Boone in a tight squeeze and kissing him again. Boone pulled back, because Shannon was standing right there, and after what she had said that morning, he didn't want it to appear like he was gloating to her or anything.

"What's going on?" Sabrina had just walked into the entryway, holding her briefcase. "I just got home, and I heard all this screaming," Sabrina gave Anna a look, but Anna took no notice.

"I got a modeling job! I'm going to be in a magazine!" Anna said excitedly to Sabrina.

"Oh, that's interesting," Sabrina said to Anna. "Are you going out tonight?"

"Yeah, me and Boone were just about to get going." Sabrina nodded curtly, and continued her way towards the kitchen. Shannon, you want to come?" Anna asked Shannon.

Shannon rolled her eyes. "Spare me. The last thing I need is to watch you too fondle each other. And besides," Shannon began putting on her left shoe, "I've got a date."

Boone frowned, and when he looked up, he noticed that Shannon was staring at him. She smirked, bending over to pick up her right shoe. Her dress gapped in the front to expose a considerable amount of cleavage, and Boone tried not to let his eyes linger.

"Okay," Anna said, not noticing what was going on. "Have fun, Shannon. But not too much fun… Come on, Boone, let's go." Boone felt Anna grab his right hand, dragging him towards the door.

"So, where do you want to eat?" He asked her when they were seated in his car, as he slid his keys into the ignition.

"I'm not really that hungry," Anna smiled suggestively, and began to rub circles on his thigh. Boone closed his eyes and imagined it was Shannon, Shannon with her halter dress that she was wearing tonight, Shannon climbing into his lap and…

"Anna, we need to get out of the driveway," Boone laughed, and she moved away from him.

"My parents and my brother are out of town," Anna continued, as Boone pulled out of the driveway. "So the house is completely fucking empty. We could have something to drink, we could go in the hot tub…" Anna tucked a piece of auburn hair behind her ear. "And then, we could go upstairs…" Anna finished her sentence with deliberate ambiguity.

"You sure you're not hungry?" He asked.

"I could turn that around and make it sound extremely dirty," Shannon (_no, idiot_, he thought), Anna said. "But I'll spare you."

"Okay," he answered.

"So, do you have a condom on you?" Asked Anna brightly, as if she was asking him if he wanted chips or fries with that.

_Thank freaking god I spared myself of writing Boone/Anna sex stuff. Don't worry, that's as far as it's going to go right now. shudders I don't think I could handle writing that. lol. Please review? I think this is the third time I've updated this weekend. Weird. _


	8. Chapter 8

**_Tangled Youth_**

**Chapter 8**

"You're in the shit," was the first thing Boone heard when he snuck into the house at seven AM the next morning. He looked up, realizing that walking on his tiptoes was no longer necessary if he had already been busted. Shannon sat on the ottoman in the living room, smirking, her hair in a messy bun, and a blanket wrapped around her shoulders over a pair of pajamas. "You are in the _shit_," she repeated, sneering. "Where the hell were you?"

"I was at Anna's," he blushed visibly, a pained expression on his face.

"That bad?" Shannon's tired face looked positively zealous now.

"What? _No_, I'm just in the shit, like you said. Is she super pissed?" Boone had hoped that Sabrina wouldn't notice his absence, well, actually, he had hoped that he would actually get home at a reasonable time.

"Why the hell didn't you come back last night?" She asked, rolling her eyes, but Boone sensed undertones of uneasiness in her voice.

"She wouldn't let me _leave_," Boone whispered hoarsely, as if Anna was standing behind him and might hear.

Shannon laughed, all traces of apprehension present in her voice seconds before completely gone. "That is like, so Anna of her." Boone looked at Shannon, and the lines under her eyes, and how her face was slightly paled under the dimness of the un-lightened room.

"Shan? Did you wait up for me?" He asked nervously, hoping he wasn't responsible for depriving his sister of sleep.

"_No_," she said, "God, don't flatter yourself!" Shannon looked disgusted, but her eyes widened and she bit her lip. "_No_!" She repeated, trying to convince herself, and stalked off, her blanket trailing behind her as she started up the stairs.

"What the _hell_ is wrong with you lately?" Boone heard the click-clack of his mother's shoes and the shrill anger in her voice before he even saw her face. Boone suddenly felt extremely inadequate in his wrinkled sweatshirt and yesterday's pants – almost like the rebellious type Boone always wished he could be. But it wasn't looking so fun right now.

As Sabrina yelled, Boone tried to zone out her words, letting his mind wander. He had only seen her face this furious when he was eight and accidentally knocked over a fine china platter that had been on display over the mantle. The way he felt after was similar to the tiny shards of glass that lay on the floor after the bowl shattered – and the red mark across his face hadn't helped matters much either, although his mother had apologized profusely for slapping him. Shannon had seen her face this furious many times before, he knew because she crawled into bed with him afterwards, fresh tears streaming down her face. When she recounted the situation – Sabrina had screamed at her for getting a D in Math, Sabrina had slapped her for insulting her and embarrassing her in front of her clients, something simple like that, always something that made Boone pull Shannon closer against him. He longed to kiss away her tears, his feelings of love towards her always overpowering the significant feelings of anger welling inside of him, blind to Shannon's flaws. But his mother was blind to Shannon's goodness, so in the end, he thought, it all balanced out.

"I swear to god, you get that girl pregnant and I'm disowning you!" Sabrina was currently ranting. Boone nodded obediently, but inside he was rolling his eyes as Sabrina continued talking. He wasn't _six_ anymore, and he also wasn't an _idiot_. But in situations like these, it was easier to just agree with her. You didn't want to talk back to Sabrina Carlyle – several of her workers had learned this the hard way, forced to pack up all of their belongings into a cardboard box, leaving the office behind. And Boone wasn't especially keen on doing the same to his house. He had no doubt in his mind that Sabrina was confident enough to kick him out of the house if he did enough to trigger her emotions. But sweet little A-student Boone wasn't worried about this. "Answer me!"

"I won't." Boone tried to stifle a yawn unsuccessfully. On top of being exhausted, he was also (shamefully) a little hung over.

"What the – what is wrong with you?" Sabrina stuttered. "What kind of answer is that! I asked

you if you were ever going to sleep over at some whore's house again without having the courtesy to even call me! And you answer, _I won't_? You would think, that after you've already done this much, you would have the decency to listen to your mother, who has done everything in the world to raise you! You've had every little, tiny thing handed to you on this platter, but _no_, all you can do is baby your sweet little Shannon – but you know what you're doing, Boone? You are _turning her against me_, and I don't appreciate that one little bit! Fuck, _fuck_!" As she spoke, her voice amplified. Sabrina hardly ever swore, but when she did, it was the only clue that she hadn't always been rich and affluent. "And now you're sleeping around." This was so untrue, Boone almost had to bite his tongue to stop from laughing. "I'm serious when I say that I'll disown you if you get someone pregnant. You'd better not become one of those men when you're older, not even having the fucking dignity to pay child support, that imbecile Samuel never lifted an undeserving arm off the couch to pay for – " Boone stared at Sabrina in shock. Sabrina stared back.

"Samuel?" Boone said as soon as he was confident his voice would work.

"You're grounded." Sabrina said, her face stone cold, changing the subject as quickly as possible. "You've been drinking, you're sleeping with this coked out whore, and – _god!_ Don't stare at me with those damn _eyes_!" Boone was incredibly surprised to see his mother wipe a tear from her cheek. "Those damn _eyes_, you just had to inherit those damn eyes! He could always seduce anyone and anything with his damn eyes, charm the pants off any girl that walked into the room! Of course, they didn't do him any good when he disappeared the minute I told him!" Sabrina coughed, realizing that she had said far too much. "You're grounded." She said again, "For a week, and you should be on your hands and knees thanking me right now! If it weren't for me, we'd be living in some dump downtown, and – " Sabrina stopped, once again opening up a door that she hadn't wanted to open. "I swear to god, you'd better finish those applications this weekend. You had _better_ start listening to me! You deliberately went behind my back – you know what? I can't talk about this anymore! I can't – " Sabrina suddenly looked at her watch and tucked her hair behind her ear, picking up her briefcase from the ottoman that Shannon had been sitting on before she went upstairs. Boone wondered in fear if she had been listening to Sabrina's entire lecture. "I have a meeting. Get ready for school." Then she disappeared through the front door, and a door slam and an engine revving up later, she was gone.

"Boone?" He heard Shannon's voice from the stairwell and a minute later, she walked down the steps and, walking towards him, suddenly enveloped him in a hug. He patted her back awkwardly. "You didn't deserve that," she pressed her lips into his ear, and he wasn't quite sure if it counted as a kiss or not.

"At least she didn't slap me," Boone said, "I get so mad when she does that to you." He tightened his grip around her, combing back a piece of her hair. He was a little distracted right now – the news of his father had caught him off guard, and now he wasn't so sure if he was so eager to find his father. "Shan? Did you hear the part about – "

"About 'Samuel'?" She asked. "Yeah. You still wanna find him?"

"I don't know," He said slowly, and Shannon let go of him, stepping back.

"So, on a lighter note," she smiled, "How was it?"

"How was what?"

"Uh, gee, I don't know," she played dumb. "The _sex_?"

"I don't know," Boone shrugged, "I mean, I don't have anything to compare it to." Shannon smirked again.

"I bet you're good in bed," she said, and Boone blushed noticeably. Shannon slapped him on the ass, which was becoming extremely common (she seemed to do it at least once a day now), and brushed past him and into the kitchen. But Boone was preoccupied thinking about everything that his mother had said. Now, he was too tired to wrap his mind around all of it, so he decided that, for now at least, denial would be a good tool to use.

* * *

It was first period, and Boone had his head on his desk, half-asleep, before class started. He looked up with a start when Kevin's backpack landed on the ground, causing a large thud. Biology books really were killer.

"Oh my god!" Kevin exclaimed. "Dude, you look horrible!"

Lauren, the smart-aleck who sat in front of Boone, turned around to see if it was true. "Let me guess," she said in a bored tone. "You're either hung over, just pulled an all-nighter, just pulled an _all-nighter­_," she raised her eyebrows. "Or you're in trouble with the parents."

"Uh," Boone put his head back on the desk, but this time he kept his eyes open. "All of the above?"

"Dude!" Kevin said loudly. "You got laid?" Lauren rolled her eyes, turning around, but everyone else stared towards Kevin and Boone. It was times like these, Boone thought, that he didn't have such a big-mouthed best friend.

"No," he said back, just as loud, though his words slurred together a little because he was tired and had a hangover, and hadn't had time to take an aspirin (god, he thought, it sounded like he was a stoner or something!) "I'm grounded." Everyone sort of shrugged and went back to what they were doing.

"Well, it figures," Lauren turned around again. "Wow, you do look bad."

"Aw," Boone smiled, sitting up. "Thanks."

Lauren, surprisingly did not roll her eyes. "Well," she blabbered, "I mean, you don't look bad, you just don't look as good as usual, not that, I mean, that's that bad or anything, I mean you usually look really good, but… no, I mean not, you know _that good_, but you usually look okay. I mean, you look good, but today you just don't. I mean, you don't look as…" Boone was basically asleep by the time she finished her ramble. "I'm sorry," he heard somewhere distantly. "I'm rambling, aren't I?"

"Yeah," he said, tilting his head to the side on the desk. "Just a little."

"Carlyle," the teacher barked. "Get your head off the desk and take out the homework." Boone stared blankly at the floor. The one time he forgot his homework… damn, it really was a crappy day.

_Okay, hello. I have nothing really to say, except please review and tell me what you liked and didn't like! Oh, and thanks, BlackberryStain for writing the longest freaking review I've ever seen! Oh, and sorry if this is like really choppy. _


	9. Chapter 9

**_Tangled Youth_**

**Chapter 9**

"Boone?" Boone looked up from laptop, where he had been laboriously writing an essay for one of his college applications. He was trying to make the essay original, but he was just some rich WASP from Southern California, and there was nothing interesting about him that set him apart. It was clear that the only way he could get into a really good school was through connections, which was something Boone had, thanks to his mother.

"Yeah?" Boone responded to his step-father, who was standing next to the desk that Boone had been working at.

"Your mother wants me to… your mother – " Boone waited expectantly for his step-father to finish his sentence. "Your mother wants me to give you a _talk_." Adam grimaced, as did Boone.

"A talk?" Boone asked, almost frightened. "Like, a… like a sex talk?"

"Yes," Adam looked down. "Do you want to go somewhere to talk?"

"No, but I also don't want to be on house arrest for the rest of my life," Boone quipped, "So sure. Where do you want to go?"

"We'll see when we reach the car, I suppose." Adam told Boone, and Boone, a little confused and reluctant, followed Adam to the car. Adam put the keys into the ignition and said, "Look, Boone. I have no idea how to do this, and I know that you're a good kid, and I sure as hell don't _want_ to do this. So, I'm not going to."

"Fine," Boone shrugged, feeling like he had just been spared, big-time.

"Want to get some ice cream?" Adam asked. Sabrina was a health-freak, and the closest thing they ever got to ice cream was these weird Japanese frozen rice balls that cost about five bucks a pop and were still disgusting.

"Okay," Boone said. They drove in relative silence, until Boone broke it. "Um, Adam?"

"What?" Adam asked.

"Why'd you marry my mom?"

"Why did I marry your mother?" Adam tapped his fingers on the steering wheel. "Well, she's… she's smart, and she's independent. I like that about her."

"If you don't mind me asking, what was Camilla like?"

Adam frowned. "Hasn't Shannon told you anything?"

"No, not really. It makes her really upset to talk about it."

"Well, I don't really want to tell you what happened if she hasn't. You two are very close, and there must be a reason why she hasn't told you. If she's not comfortable with it, then I don't want to betray her trust."

Boone nodded. "Sort of like my mother. And why she hasn't told me about my dad."

"It's an extremely sensitive issue for her, Boone. I think you have a right to know about that. He is _your_ father, and if you want to pursue a relationship with him, then I don't think Sabrina can stop you." Adam pulled into the driveway of a small ice cream store.

Once they had bought their ice cream (Boone got rocky road in a cone, Adam got vanilla in a cup), they sat down at a table outside. It was a balmy day, but then again, what day in Malibu wasn't? "Do you know anything about it, Adam?" Boone asked, regarding the situation with his father.

"Yes," Adam said, taking a bite of his ice cream. "I'm surprised that she hasn't told you anything. You _are_ seventeen, but Sabrina is still grasping onto this image of you when you were ten."

"Parents never like watching their children grow up," Boone noted. "Except for the fact that now she can leave me home alone without feeling guilty about it. You know, I don't even know why she had me in the first place. I'm pretty sure I was an accident." Boone had no idea why he was spilling his guts to a man he hardly ever talked to. Worse, everything that he was saying probably would get back to his mother – like she wasn't mad enough at him already.

Adam sighed. "Don't tell your mother I'm telling you this. I mean, we are supposed to be having a sex talk, which isn't really happening, so let's just keep all of this a secret, okay?"

"Okay," Boone agreed, eager to finally hear something about his father, but at the same time, a little apprehensive.

"Well," Adam struggled. "I don't know _everything_, but I do know quite a bit."

"Okay…" Boone urged his step-father to continue.

"His name is Samuel, but he might go by Sam."

"What's his last name?" Boone asked. Suddenly, he felt like an idiot. His mother's maiden name _wasn't_ Carlyle, so obviously, Samuel's last name was Carlyle. Sabrina's maiden name had been something awful like Dillingham or something, and obviously, when she was a famous entrepreneur, that wouldn't do. "It's Carlyle, isn't it?"

"Yes, I suppose it is," Adam said. "He lives in an apartment in LA, I believe. When your mother became pregnant with you, she was planning on marrying Sam and playing off the pregnancy as planned to her parents. Obviously, that didn't work out, she hasn't told me why, but now her parents don't talk to her. But she hadn't been cut off the trust fund, I don't think, so she had enough money to take care of you and hire babysitters and such."

Boone was not impressed. This story was not nearly as ground-breaking as he had expected it to be. "So I take it my mom and this Sam person don't talk?"

"No, of course not. Except I think he called a few times when you were young, but Sabrina wouldn't let him keep in touch with you because she didn't want him to hurt you."

"That's it?"

"I think so. That's all I know."

"Oh," the disappointment Boone was feeling was evident in his tone. At least, though, he now had enough information to find him, and get the story from "Sam" himself. "Well, thanks for telling me."

After they finished their ice cream, they got back in the car and drove back to the Carlyle/Rutherford mansion. When they pulled into the driveway, Adam hesitated before getting out. "Just remember, kid, always use protection." He said, and then started walking towards his home office.

* * *

"Hey, Boone," Shannon cornered Boone as he started up the stairs. She was dripping wet and wrapped in only a small towel that displayed cleavage _and_ legs. Well wasn't it his lucky day? "Um, Anna called like three times yesterday." 

"Yesterday?" Boone wondered why he was just hearing about this now.

"Yeah," Shannon answered. "So you should call her back. You have something in your hair." Shannon reached a manicured finger towards the top of his head and flicked something off of it. "There, it was like a piece of fluff or something. Well, clearly, I should go get dressed…"

"Oh." Boone said. "Well I'm finishing my USC application, which I'm sure will be just as thrilling."

"I'm sure," she smiled, hoisting the towel tighter around her body, as it had been slipping. Boone took out his cell phone and sat on the impossibly hard 5000 dollar couch. It was ironic, he thought, that although the couch was so expensive, it was still less comfortable than the 79 dollar special at Ikea. Blaring on the screen of his cell phone, were the words, "7 new voicemail messages." Four were from Anna, two were from Shannon, and one was from Sabrina.

The first message was from Sabrina, from two nights ago. He hadn't bothered to turn on his cell phone while he was at Anna's, because it might be rather… compromising to have a cell phone in your pants pocket. _Ew_, Boone thought, like a ditzy ten year old girl. "Boone, where are you? It's a school night and I've never had to institute a curfew, but I'm instituting one now, and it's ten thirty PM, and what do you know? It's eleven, so you'd better be home in five minutes. Bye."

The next one was from Shannon. "Hey Boone, it's Shannon. Uh, it's like, midnight, and you're not home… you're probably with Anna, and when I say with Anna I mean _with Anna_… wow, I just got a really bad picture in my mind. Anyway, I just got back from this date with this guy… and it totally sucked. All he wanted was to get into my pants, and… you know what? Come home! This house is fucking creepy without you! God!"

The next one was also from Shannon. "Oh my god. Boone, you should see your mother right now. She is completely freaking out, like she's gone psycho or something! She's gotten this strange idea that you are currently in a gas station bathroom in Chino snorting cocaine, and I told her that it's more likely that you're having hot sex with Anna in her swanky 8-bedroom mansion in Beverly Hills, but she doesn't… damn! Now she's yelling at me! Get back here this fucking second, otherwise I'm going to prosecute, I mean, persecute you!"

"Hey Boone, it's Anna." She giggled. "So, I had a lot of fun last night," she said slowly, "And I thought that maybe you could come over again after school today, unless you're too tired, but I have an idea of something that might help re-energize you." She giggled again. In current time, Boone rolled his eyes. "Anyway, call me back. I love you, bye."

The next message was also from Anna. "Hey, so it's lunchtime at Saint Fuckworth's, and I can't find you. Are you like, avoiding me or something? Oh, and there's this rumor going around that you came to school stoned, but baby, I don't even think you know what that means. So I think I stopped that rumor. Being stoned doesn't have to do with rocks, just so you know. That was mean. Was that mean? Anyway, Shannon is rolling her eyes at me, so I gotta go. I _love_ you!" In current time, Boone blinked confusedly.

"Hey Boone. It's after-school on Friday, and I'm looking at my bed, and I was trying to figure out what was wrong with it, and guess what?" In the message, she sounded a little annoyed. "I found out, Boone. It's that _you_ are not in it. And I was trying to think if there was any reason, any reason at _all_, why you might not want to be in my bed, and I couldn't. But obviously, there is, and I'd be really interested to find out what it is! Okay! So call me when you figure it out. _Love_ you." Her voice was laced with sarcasm.

"Boone! Why the fucking hell haven't you called me! I mean, did I do something wrong? _Did_ I do something wrong? Or maybe it's you! Maybe you're the jerk! I mean, what kind of guy doesn't call their girlfriend for two days after sleeping with them for the first time? I mean, here I am, throwing myself at your feet (like, literally) and you don't even have the decency to _call_ me? God, you're being an asshole! L… _never mind!_"

_Shit_, Boone thought. He was in trouble. He was thinking about his apology strategies when Sabrina appeared in the living room, carrying a Louis Vuitton tote bag.

"Goodbye," Sabrina said, still sounding a little bitter.

"What? Where are you going?" Boone asked.

"Oh! Didn't I tell you? I have a client in Santa Barbara – it's a very high-profile function, and their wedding is being held tomorrow up there, and I decided that it would be best just to stay the weekend there. Adam is coming as well."

"Why didn't anybody tell me this?" Boone asked, furrowing his eyebrows. Nobody ever told him _anything_.

"Why didn't you tell me you were going to be out all night on Thursday?" Sabrina asked rhetorically, taking a few steps towards the door. "Now. Listen to me. There will be _no_ parties, _no_ drugs, and most importantly, _no_ sex."

"Where do you get the idea I'm into drugs or parties? I've never gotten drunk in my life."

"_No sex,_ Boone."

"I'm a _good_ kid, okay?" It sounded like Sabrina was talking to some kind of a criminal.

"Watch your sister," Adam started down the stairs, his carry-on bag galumphing down the stairs.

"Adam, don't ruin the carpeting," Sabrina said.

"Watch Shannon, make sure she doesn't get into any trouble, okay, Boone?" Adam continued, ignoring his wife.

"Uh huh," Boone said.

"Okay, bye." Sabrina lingered by the door, waiting for Adam to catch up. "No –"

"Yes mother, no sex." Boone finished for her. "Thanks."

Within seconds after Sabrina locked the door behind her, Boone realized that he was home alone. It was kind of strange, having this huge house to himself. Boone went upstairs and into his room, sitting on his bed, and dialed Anna's number. He wasn't sure how he was going to make her not upset anymore, so he decided to apologize profusely, and then charm her. That would probably work, he decided.

"Hello?" Anna picked up.

"Hi, Anna?" He said weakly. "It's –"

"Why haven't you called?" She exploded.

"Anna, I'm really sorry. My mom was – "

"You know that is the worst thing you can do, right? Not calling me for that long _after_ we, you know… I mean, that sort of gives me a bad impression, you know?"

"Anna, listen to me. I'm really, really sorry. My mom caught me sneaking home, and she yelled at me, _and_ grounded me, and then I was at school, and I didn't see you, but I was _so_ exhausted, and I forgot to do my English assignment, so that's what I was doing at lunch. And my cell phone was off so I didn't get to check my messages until just now."

"Well, aren't you just full of excuses?" She said coolly.

"It's not my fault, okay? I know it sounds like a load of crap, but I'm not lying. I wouldn't lie to you, okay, baby?" He thought that maybe calling her a pet name would help her forgive him – Anna had a weird thing for pet names, even though it sounded a little unnatural.

"I don't know…" he could hear her smile in her voice, and he was pretty sure that forgiveness was coming soon. "I guess you wouldn't lie."

"I'm not. And I'm really sorry I didn't call you. I should have."

"Yeah. I guess I'll forgive you," she allowed.

"Okay," he smiled in relief. "So, what are you doing right now?"

"What are _you_ doing right now?" She retorted.

"I just had this really weird experience – I went out for ice cream with my step-dad."

"Oh," Anna said, sounding uninterested. "That's weird."

"And then Adam and my mom left to go to Santa Barbara for the weekend. It was weird, they didn't even tell me they were leaving. My parents never tell me anything."

"Are you home alone?" She suddenly sounded a lot more interested.

"Shannon's here, but besides that, yeah."

"Oh," Anna said, and neither of them said anything for a second. "So?"

Suddenly Boone understood. "You wanna come over?" He asked, trying to put a flirtatious tone in his voice.

She giggled. "Yeah," she said. "When should I come?"

"Whenever," he told her, craning his neck towards the clock on his nightstand, which read 5:32 PM. "Maybe after dinner?"

"'Kay," she responded, sounding giddy. "I love you."

"Me too," he said, not sure if it was true. "So I'll see you at eightish?"

"Yeah… I can't wait!"

"Bye."

"Bye, baby," she said. Boone still wasn't sure if he liked this nickname very much. Honestly, he didn't understand it. I mean, why did people call their significant others' 'baby' anyway? It's not like they were babies, per se. _Whatever_, Boone thought, and took out that damn application again. He really had come to hate it.

After a few hours of filling out forms and answering stupid questions like, "What extra-curricular activities have you participated in that had a great impact on your life?" and heating up leftover chicken, begging Shannon to eat it, and going back to answering stupid questions, the doorbell rang.

"Is that Anna?" Shannon called from her bedroom.

"Yeah, I think so." Boone stood up to go get the door, and Shannon followed. When he opened the door, Anna was standing on the steps, swaying a little.

"Hey, ba – " she started, walking into the entryway. But her words were interrupted when she passed out on the floor with a resounding thud.

_I think this chapter was really pointless, but tell me what you thought anyway, k? Thanks, and if you haven't, please read my one-shot Lying is the Most Fun a Girl Can Have. Thank ooo! _


	10. Chapter 10

**_Tangled Youth _**

****

**Chapter 10 **

"Holy shit," Boone swore, bending over to pick up the pathetic looking, unconscious girl on the floor. Shannon stared, speechless. When he had her securely in his arms, he could smell the alcohol on her breath. "Tequila," he muttered.

Shannon closed her eyes, breathing in, tucking a piece of stray hair behind her ear. "I've had to take her home like this so many times before," she said. "Always getting drunk and acting like a total idiot. _I_ have to take the responsibility, every single time."

Boone looked at Anna – her hair was mess, her mascara was smeared, she definitely had the look of a drugged up person. Anna didn't do drugs, though, she just drank – a lot, remembering their first date, when she had had about five beers without being affected by it. He had thought that she must have had a pretty high tolerance for that to happen, considering that he had gotten drunk off of one margarita at her house a few nights ago. It had taken her about six just to start giggling. Boone stared at the pathetic mess in his arms, and wondered how many it had taken her to get here. "I guess I should put her to bed," he said, more to himself than Shannon.

"I'll get a cold washcloth," Shannon offered. Boone took Anna to the couch and lay her down, and then went into the kitchen to get a glass of water, adding a few ice cubes and putting it on the lamp table, with a coaster, next to the couch, while Shannon walked towards the bathroom to get a washcloth.

When she got back, Shannon handed Boone the wet, peach-colored washcloth. "She's your girlfriend," she spat as Boone wiped Anna's face with the washcloth. After a few minutes, as Shannon started to get impatient, Anna began to stir.

"Anna?" Boone asked, concerned.

"Wha…?" she said groggily. "Oh," she opened her eyes in realization. "Shit. What happened?"

"You showed up her drunk – "

" – and you passed out on the fucking porch," Shannon finished disdainfully. "Who the hell gets drunk _before_ they go see their boyfriends?"

"My parents are gone for another two weeks," Anna explained weakly. "They're always gone," she choked out.

"I'm sorry," he told her, "But you shouldn't drink all the time like this."

Anna took Boone's hand, and he didn't want to get in a fight, so he didn't pull back. "I don't drink that much," she said, playing with Boone's fingers.

Shannon snorted. "Says the girl who just passed out on the floor."

"You know what, Shannon? If you don't have anything nice to say, then why don't you just be quiet?" Anna responded, hurt.

"Because we all know that's the rule _you_ abide to," Shannon scoffed.

Anna started crying, much to Boone's horror, as he had no idea how to react. "I could use some fucking _support_, you know! My parents don't give a shit about me, and now you're being a bitch!" She cried.

"Anna," Boone said softly, "You're right about needing support, but I think Shannon might have a point, too."

"What? That I'm just some _drunk_?" She coughed. Boone and Shannon exchanged looks. It seemed like that was _exactly_ what Anna was. "Oh, quit acting like you _know_ something about me!"

"Anna," Boone tried, but Anna turned away from him, rolling her eyes. "Baby?" He tried again, and Anna turned towards him. He tried not to look too smug.

"Shannon, can me and Boone talk for a few minutes? Alone?" Anna sat up.

It was Shannon's turn to roll her eyes, but she obeyed Anna and exited the room. When she stood up from the couch, Boone felt a void.

"Anna, I think you should stop drinking," Boone told Anna. She looked skeptical, so he decided to use a different approach. He scooted closer to her, brushing his hand over her knee when he did so, and whispered the same thing right into her ear, inserting in a couple of _baby's _and _pleases_ into the mix. "Do you think you could maybe try to do that?" he murmured, pressing his lips into her ear. She smiled.

"Yeah, I could try that," she said.

"Promise?" he whispered.

"I promise," she sighed. "God, Boone." He pulled back. "I have a headache, so I'm going to go to sleep. I'll be in your room… if you need me?" She said, like she was trying to tell him something else. Boone didn't get it. "K," she sounded disappointed. "I'll be upstairs." She started up the stairs, just as Shannon was coming down. They avoided each other's gaze, and Shannon, clad in only a t-shirt and boy shorts, sat down next to Boone.

"Hey," she said. "I hope Anna's not too mad at me," Shannon finished darkly. But Boone wasn't paying attention to what she was saying. He was watching her lips moving, wondering how they would feel if they were to move against his own lips, and he wanted with everything in him to run his hands over her bare thigh.

"Yeah," he said, agreeing with whatever she had said. "Hey, thanks for helping me out with her earlier."

"You're welcome. Anna can be a handful." Shannon said, annoyed with her friend.

"Yeah, I guess she can," Boone agreed, and then, to his surprise, Shannon leaned her head against his shoulder.

"What kind of cologne are you wearing? You smell really nice," she observed.

"Uh, thanks. It's the same thing as I always wear, the Ralph Lauren stuff you got me for my birthday."

"I have such good taste," she laughed. "God, but you smell like… so good," she nuzzled her head into his neck further. Boone could barely breathe. But if he thought it was bad now, it was worse when she put her head in his lap, lying down next to him. He prayed to the gods of testosterone that he wouldn't… you know. Just in case, though, he scooted away from her.

"Thanks," he said uncomfortably.

"Hey, do you wanna make me a milkshake?" She blurted out spontaneously.

"Um," Boone answered, confused. "Sure." They went into the kitchen and he took out the blender. "What kind do you want?"

"Do we have any chocolate ice cream?" She asked, opening the refrigerator, and from his spot by the sink, he had a perfect view of her long, gorgeous legs. "Oh good, we do!" She handed Boone the pint of Godiva fudge ice cream, and got an ice cream scoop out of a drawer. He got some milk from the refrigerator and his secret ingredient for milkshakes, vanilla, out of the cupboard. After putting the contents on the counter into the blender, he mixed it up, and poured it into a large glass and handed it to Shannon, eagerly awaiting her reaction.

"Oh! Shit!" She exclaimed after taking a tentative sip.

"Is it that bad?" Boone wondered out loud. How had his recipe gone so terribly awry?

"Are you fucking kidding me? Oh my _god_! I'm going to have a milkshake orgasm!" She exclaimed, and Boone tried to erase a certain image he was getting out of his mind. Before he knew what was happening, Shannon was pressing her lips into his, and they remained there for a full two seconds before she pulled back. He could still taste the chocolate from her lips when she ordered, "Try some!" She got an extra spoon from a drawer. She dipped it into the drink, and fed Boone a spoonful. "It's good, isn't it?"

"Yeah, it is pretty good," Boone agreed.

"Messy boy," Shannon smiled, wiping some chocolate residue from the corner of his lip. He tried not to smile back, but probably failed, as the next words out of her mouth were, "You're so cute, Boone." Oh my god. He was officially going to die. "I gotta go, um, call someone," she said awkwardly, recognizing his discomfort, taking her milkshake with her as she walked down the hall.

"Okay," he said, even though she was gone and had already left. His skin still stung from where she had touched him, his mind was still reveling regarding her "milkshake orgasm" comment, and his lips, they were the worst. They tingled, and Boone was afraid they wouldn't ever stop doing so. He really, really wanted to have sex with his sister. _You're gross_, he thought, but it didn't put a damper on the feeling.

He went upstairs towards his room, where Anna was in his bed, asleep. _Shannon_, he thought, convincing himself that it was Shannon lying in his bed, eagerly wanting to put it into good use. He closed his door and lay down next to her, _Shannon_, and kissed her neck, ignoring the smell of alcohol that still reeked on her skin.

"Mmm," said _Shannon_, waking up, rolling onto her back, and Boone slowly crawled on top of her, kissing her lips, and all at once, the tingling stopped. _Shannon_ kissed back eagerly, sitting up and straddling him. She pressed herself against him, and he did the same, almost believing that this truly was Shannon. _Shannon_, he thought, remembering her bare legs and shoulders, and how she puckered her lips in concentration when she applied her mascara. He tugged on the bottom of _Shannon's_ shirt, and she pulled back to remove it. He moved his hands up _Shannon's_ sides, thinking of the cleavage she exposed when she leaned over, as he felt up the girl in his lap. _Shannon_ moaned, unbuttoning the top button of his jeans and slipping her hand between them. "Do you have… do you have one?" _Shannon_ sighed, and Boone wondered when Shannon's voice had gotten so scratchy. _Right, idiot_, he thought, _because it's not Shannon_. But he dismissed the thought from his head, and let the girl he was in bed with become Shannon. _Shannon_ took off her incredibly short denim skirt, tossing it aside and giggling. Boone leaned away from her for a second, reaching into his dresser drawer to get a condom. After he took his pants off and put it on, he went back to kissing Anna, no, _Shannon_, he reminded himself, lying on top of her.

They kept going, and there was point when the line of distinction between Anna and Shannon became seamless, and the girl he was thrusting into had completely morphed into being Shannon. And he when he told her he loved her when he came, it didn't even seem like a lie. "God, you're good," Anna told him when they were done. It was over, so she wasn't Shannon anymore, and Boone felt filthy.

_God_, he thought, disgusted with himself. Even though Anna hadn't noticed, he still felt like he had sinned, but the more he did this, the more he slept with this virtual Shannon, and other virtual Shannon's to come, he wouldn't feel as bad about it. "I love you," Anna sighed, but all Boone could do was grunt in response, pretending to be asleep. After Boone was sure she was asleep, Boone went downstairs, and found himself in his mother's office. He was shocked when, sitting genially on her chair, was the address for Sam Carlyle.

_I know, I know. I was specifically instructed not to do any "scenes" with Boone and Anna, but I really did try to make it seem like Shannon. Hopefully, it was bearable, maybe even better than bearable? Please tell me what you thought. Thanks! _


	11. Chapter 11

**_Tangled Youth_**

**Chapter 11**

Boone didn't know how long he had been staring at the chair, the words "133 Freyer Avenue" blurring together seamlessly, when he heard a noise behind him. He practically jumped in surprise, and turned around to see Anna, wearing pajamas that she must have changed into.

"Hey, you," she smiled uncertainly, "Where did you go?" She wrapped her arms around him, beckoning him up the stairs. "Come on, let's go back to bed."

"I'll be up in a minute," he told her.

"I'm sure you will," she smirked, always managing to make everything sound quite inappropriate. "Hurry up, okay?"

"Yeah," he nodded, feeling guilty to be disappointing her. Plus, he was still feeling like complete and total scum for pretending she was Shannon. At one point, he was pretty sure he had groaned Shannon's name out loud, and he hoped she hadn't noticed. The eager smile on her face was a clue, he thought, that she hadn't.

When she left, Boone refocused his vision on the sticky note on the chair. He was too afraid to step forward, but brave enough not to step back. The handwriting was harsh but even, written in blue ballpoint pen. Clearly, it had been transposed from somewhere, probably one of Sabrina's ancient address books that she insisted on saving, and he recognized the handwriting as Adam's.

He wasn't surprised there – who else would have wanted him to find his father? But he was surprised that Adam had the audacity to go behind Sabrina's back to find the address. But, like Boone, maybe he figured that what Sabrina didn't know wouldn't hurt her.

Suddenly, Boone heard the front door click. He heard footsteps tiptoeing down the hallway, the sound of heels touching wood as clear as the clanking of cutlery against a wine glass.

"Holy shit!" Shannon stopped suddenly at the doorway of the office. "What are you doing here?"

"Where were you?" Everything about the address was instantly erased from his mind – his mind bombarded with worry and anxiety regarding where Shannon had been, and more importantly, _who_ she had been with.

"I was out," she said vaguely, "I just decided to drop by this party."

"At," Boone looked at the clock on the wall, "One thirty in the morning?"

"Well," Shannon simpered girlishly, "I was actually with this guy."

Boone froze. Those were the most horrible words in the English language, words that he had dreaded hearingfrom Shannon for years and years. Shannon, out with some guy, at one thirty in the morning? He had been so convinced that the girl on the bed had been Shannon, he hadn't even considered her whereabouts. He hoped that Shannon didn't noticed how dramatically his face fell. "Come on, Boone," Shannon said , "Who says that you're the only one allowed to get any?"

"Who's the guy?"

"Oh, _what_, so you can go attempt to beat him up?" Shannon scoffed. "I'm not stupid enough to tell you." Boone frowned, his brows furrowing. "It's your own fault, you know. The second you went upstairs, I decided to spare myself listening to Anna _moaning_ how much she loved you," she said condescendingly, dramatizing the words in that way that made Boone feel even more like a piece of crap left on the ground not worthy enough to be disposed of properly, "So I left. 'Night, Boone." She kissed his neck (she always liked to push her limits) and squeezed his arm as her form of saying goodnight, softly in the place that she knew tickled him. But it didn't make Boone want to laugh. He felt like crying.

When she left, Boone stared at the post-it note a little longer. Finally, he grabbed it impulsively, and went upstairs, stuffing it into the top drawer of his desk. He was going to think about that _later_. He was going to think about Shannon's lack of virginity _later_, he decided. "Boone?" He heard a small voice from his bed.

"Yeah?" He said back.

"What are you doing?"

"Nothing," he said, and lay down on his back. But when Anna snuggled in closer to him, he didn't argue, and he realized that his body liked how she felt. So he closed his eyes, his mind buzzing _Shannon_, and, though he knew it would bring him many more thoughts of remorse later, pulled her under the covers.

* * *

The next morning, Boone woke up with a crick in his neck, a headache of pounding guilt, and his eyes were squinted in bleary confusion. Anna was sound asleep and had her arms flung around his neck, hence the crick, and Boone tried not to wake her up as he put on his clothes and walked over to his desk, making sure that the sticky note was still there. It was, and so were the words _133 Freyer Avenue, Apartment #301, Los Angeles, California_. Boone had no idea what to do with this small but vital bit of information. Where did he even start? Should he try to find him? Should he call him first? He didn't even have the phone number, though he could easily obtain it. But that was logistics, and what was more important was deciding whether he wanted to go at all. What if his father was just like his mom had said – good for nothing, lazy, and slept around? Boone looked uncomfortably at the sleeping naked girl in his bed, and suddenly felt like some kind of slut. _You're not a slut_, he said to himself, wishing his mind wouldn't wander when he needed to concentrate. Boone heard Anna stir in the bed and quickly stuffed the post-it back into his desk drawer. She muttered something unintelligible.

"What?"

"Can you get me a couple hundred Advil?" She asked, opening her eyes and burying her face into the comforter.

"How does two sound?" The last thing she needed was to go into comatose again from OD'ing on Advil.

"No, I need 3. I always take three for cramps and hangovers." She explained. "You know," she said to herself, "I should go on the pill, because there's this kind where you only get your period like five times a year, which would be really awesome."

"I wonder how that works," he said.

"God Boone," Anna exhaled in frustration, "You are so lucky you are not a girl and you do not have a hangover! Ew, I think I'm PMSing too."

"Good to know," he half-smiled. "Here, let me get you that Advil." Boone walked into the bathroom next door, not thinking to knock on the door. Sitting on the edge of the counter was Shannon, wearing what she had been wearing last night. She clearly had not showered, and her eyes were red and bloodshot as if she had been crying.

"God," she sobbed, trying to put on a bitchy expression, "You never knock."

"Shannon," Boone said softly, "Are you okay?"

But Shannon had no time to respond, because Anna appeared in the doorway, wearing a gigantic blanket from Boone's bed around her shoulders. "Boone? I need Advil," she whined.

"Oh, great, so you can acquire another substance abuse problem along with the alcoholism and the impending STDs?" Shannon sneered, rolling her eyes at Anna's clothing choice, obviously still resentful towards her.

"Shut up, and quit being a bitch," Anna squinted. Shannon sniffled, and Boone instantly felt remorse – Anna should be mad at _him_, not at Shannon. "Oh my god, are you crying?"

"No," Shannon wiped her eyes unconvincingly.

"Oh my god," cooed Anna, "What happened?"

"Nothing," Shannon responded stubbornly. "Boone, could you move? I'm kind of stuck."

"Yeah," he moved towards the doorway, but when he stepped out of the room for a moment, he looked up to find that the door had slammed in his face.

"I'm sorry!" He heard Shannon sobbing, her voice muffled thanks to the thickness of the door.

"I'm sorry too!" Anna cried back. "Now tell me what happened…" Boone would never understand girls, he thought.

* * *

About ten minutes later, Boone was in the kitchen making scrambled eggs, when he finally heard Anna and Shannon scuffling downstairs. Surprisingly, they were laughing, although Shannon's laughter sounded a bit feeble. He _knew_ it had to do with the guy, and somehow, Boone felt personally responsible for it.

Anna came up behind him, now wearing considerably more clothing, and wrapped her arms around his waist, nuzzling her head into his shoulder. "'Morning," she murmured into his neck. "I'm all drugged up now, so I won't bitch at you anymore."

"Good to know," he smiled uncomfortably, catching eye contact with Shannon.

"Was I bugging you?" Anna continued, her eyes closed, so she didn't notice that anything was awkward.

"No," he said.

"Good," Anna inhaled. "I love you."

"I know, me too, but you're making me burn your breakfast," he told her good-naturedly. Anna let go of her embrace and sat down at the table, staring at him with a blank expression on her face. Shannon rolled her eyes

"Holy fucking shit!" She exploded suddenly. "What time are your parents coming home?" Boone practically dropped the hot pan of eggs he was holding. The last thing he needed was for his mom to be even more pissed off – Boone imagined himself living in a cardboard box on the streets of east LA, and shuddered.

"I don't know," Boone looked at the clock, which read 10:17 AM. "Probably pretty soon, why don't you get your stuff together and – "

"Boone." Shannon cut in suddenly. "You fucking idiot. It's _Saturday_."

"Oh," Anna giggled stupidly. "Sorry, blonde moment." Shannon glared at her. "So Boone," Anna continued, "What do you wanna do today?"

"My mom is going to crucify me if I don't finish my applications this weekend," Boone said, scraping the scrambled eggs off of the pan and onto three plates.

"Aw," Anna sounded disappointed. "And you have to do that _today_?"

"Yeah," and he had to think about his father, he added silently.

"So when are you kicking me out?" Anna asked as Boone passed her a plate with eggs and strawberries on it. "Oh thank god," she grabbed the plate eagerly, "I haven't eaten in two days. I had the photo shoot I was telling you about on Thursday, and I didn't want to look all bloated. But seriously," she stuffed a bite into her mouth. "Anorexia is _not_ for me." Shannon looked stung, taking her plate from Boone, and tentatively took a tiny taste of the eggs.

"Hey," Boone admonished Anna, nodding at Shannon.

"_Sorry_," Anna's eyes widened, like he had just slapped her. For about the millionth time in the last twenty-four hours, Boone felt like the biggest asshole in the world.

"It's okay," he consoled her, "Don't feel bad."

"Uh huh," Anna still appeared terrified, and Boone had no idea what to do. Shannon just looked at him, surprisingly quiet this morning.

"Okay," he said awkwardly. "Anyone done?"

"Yeah, I'm done," Anna said uncomfortably, pushing her plate towards the center of the table.

"Anna," Boone looked at her, concerned. "It's okay." He placed a comforting hand on her shoulder. "It's okay," he repeated, rubbing his hand on her shoulder softly.

"Okay," she agreed.

"Shannon, you okay?" he said to Shannon, who was being uncharacteristically quiet.

"Yeah," she smiled briefly, but he was afraid to return her eye contact.

"Right," Anna said, "I'm going to go take a quick shower." She stood up and left the table, heading upstairs. Before Shannon could say anything, Boone told Shannon what was on his mind.

"Shan," he said, "I found my dad's address, and I think I want to visit him. Will you come with me?" Shannon opened her mouth in shock.

"You found him?" She repeated. "How?"

"His address was on the chair in the office. I think your dad found it. So will you go with me?" He furrowed his brows, afraid she would say no. But he really needed some moral support if he was going to do this.

"They're going away for the weekend in a month," Shannon said slowly, "To Baja. We should go then."

"Are you serious?" Boone was surprised how quickly she said yes. "What about your boyfriend?"

"He's not my boyfriend," Shannon looked down. "He's some drunk frat boy," she bit her lip. "I'm such a whore." But Boone didn't have time to respond, because Anna had reappeared in the kitchen with a question about the workings of the spigot on his shower. Shannon smirked at him, but Boone wasn't sure why. He found out a few minutes later.

_Sorry, the end was rather gross and unnecessary, but whatever. The next chapter will be when they are leaving to go visit Boone's father. I have no idea how I am going to do this. Any suggestions are appreciated. Anyway, please review! Hope you liked! Oh, and just so you know, this story doesn't have anything to do with Resistance or any of my other stories, except they all have Anna. Just so you know. Thanks!_


	12. Chapter 12

**_Tangled Youth_**

****

**Chapter 12**

"Boone," Shannon laughed comfortingly, "It's going to be fine. Seriously." But Boone wasn't so sure, he was practically shaking as they sat in park in the driveway of his father's apartment building. "It's okay," she said quietly, touching his thigh to comfort him. But like every physical contact they had, there was a definite sexual undercurrent, and Boone tried desperately not to shiver, momentarily forgetting the situation at hand. Her hand remained there a little too long, but she pulled back before the gesture could be deemed entirely inappropriate. "You gonna go in or not?" She prodded.

"What if he shuts the door in our face?" Boone forced out. She crept her hand back towards his thigh, soothingly rubbing circles on his leg.

"So he shuts the door in our face, and then we'll go out and get drunk and life will go on," she smiled. "And that's our worst case scenario. Which isn't even so bad." It wasn't that simple, Boone thought, and he wasn't sure if Shannon truly believed it was, or if she just wanted to. "You're not going to chicken out, are you?"

"No," he told her, confidently. He didn't want Shannon to think he was a coward. "Come on, let's go." She pulled back, and he stepped out of the car, closing the door determinately behind him. Shannon went around the front of the car, and stood beside him.

"Which one is it?" She asked.

"301," he answered, his voice quivering a bit.

"Come on," she took his hand, "It's this way." Boone pulled his hand away.

"I'm not a baby," he said grumpily.

Shannon was not impressed. "Whatever," she rolled her eyes.

"Wait," Boone stalled. "I need to turn off my cell phone in case Anna calls."

"Why?" Shannon crossed her arms over her chest. She was wearing a tight, light blue shirt that just barely hit her waist. Even in such a serious location, he couldn't help but notice how her body moved, her mannerisms, and the tone of her words.

"In case she calls," Boone attempted to make this not sound like total bullshit. He took his phone out of his pocket and pressed down on the end button until it shut off.

"Okay," she said impatiently, "Let's go up."

A round-faced, middle aged brunette woman holding a large bowl opened the door. He didn't even have time to say anything before the woman looked up, making eye contact with him. Her mouth dropped open. "Oh my god," She barely whispered, and the bowl hit the floor with a crash. Boone leaned over to pick it up, and the woman was too startled to stop him. Could this be… his stepmother?

"Um." Said Boone awkwardly, handing her the bowl, which, luckily, had been empty. "I'm Boone, and I'm – " The woman nodded quickly, taking the bowl, and silencing him. She had yet to notice Shannon.

"Sam?" The woman called through the house weakly.

"What?" Boone swallowed when he heard the voice of his father, whom he heard walking through the hallway. He appeared next to the woman, clad in a sweatshirt and khaki pants. He looked at his wife, presumably, and then glanced at Boone. Sam was a few inches taller than Boone, and although Sam was rounder and older than Boone, and had darker hair, it was clear that they were related. The resemblance of their eyes was startling, which perhaps explained why the woman had dropped what she was carrying. "Boone?" Sam said disbelievingly. Shannon shifted next to him, and Boone was practically speechless.

"Yeah," he forced out. "I'm sorry I – "

"This is my wife Susannah," Sam cut him off, introducing him to the petrified looking woman beside him. "Is this your girlfriend?" He motioned towards Shannon, smiling.

"No," Boone said a little too eagerly. "My sister, Shannon." Susannah's mouth dropped, if possible, even further and she looked at her husband for an explanation. "Stepsister," Boone corrected. "Sorry."

"Well, it's nice to meet you," Sam seemed surprisingly calm about the whole situation, and shook Shannon's hand. Shannon smiled reassuringly at Boone. "It's nice to meet you – see you, again," Sam corrected, reaching out to shake his son's hand. Boone shook back, stoic, still barely able to speak. "It's been a while," Sam laughed a short, harsh chuckle. "Come in," Shannon and Boone followed Susannah and Sam into the house, which was a medium-sized apartment with lush carpeting and aged, but high-quality furniture. There were four other people milling about, who gave Sam, Susannah, Boone, and Shannon confused looks when they walked past. _Relatives_, Boone thought, because the middle-aged couple, a young girl, and the old woman all bore a resemblance to Sam. Susannah gave Sam another reproachful look, and within seconds, she had escaped behind a nearby door, slamming it behind her, tears running down her face. Boone instantly felt guilty for making his father's wife cry.

"This is my son," Sam announced, and Boone looked up nervously, attempting a half-smile at the people. "Boone."

"Hello," the old woman, sitting at the dining room table, was the first of the stunned people to speak. "Are you Sabrina's son?"

"Yes," he answered, surprised that she knew.

"I'm Samuel's mother. Abigail," said the woman, and Boone looked blankly at the white-haired lady, who he never seen in his life, that was supposedly his grandmother. "Is that your girlfriend?" She gestured towards Shannon.

"No, it's my stepsister, Shannon," he said awkwardly. "Look, I'm sorry I didn't call," he turned towards Sam. "I really should have called, I just didn't know your number and – "

"It's fine," Sam laughed heartily. "I get unexpected visitors all the time!"

"He's got two other estranged children," a middle-aged person with short brown hair croaked. "He's got no responsibility, Samuel here."

Sam, amazingly, did not look insulted. "My older sister, Judy," he introduced. "And this is her husband Steve," Steve looked preoccupied at the stove in the kitchenette, giving Boone a half-wave. "This is their daughter Lilly. I guess that would make you her cousin." A curly-headed, bright-eyed girl looked up. She had been coloring in a coloring book, sitting on the couch.

"You're pretty," she said to Shannon simply, and Shannon smiled, biting her lip. She had a weakness for cute little girls.

"Thanks," she exclaimed, "You're pretty, too!" Everyone seemed to relax a bit, and Steve went back to his cooking, making a decision to not be part of this ordeal. Judy gave Boone a calculating look, and glared at her brother. Abigail looked testily at her son, but smiled at Boone, not judging him. Shannon went over to the girl, Lilly, and sat next to her. "What are you coloring?" She said excitedly, beaming at Boone, who attempted a smile back. Lilly started talking, as did Judy, scolding her brother. Steve quietly stirred the boiling soup, which also contributed some noise to the room.

"Sam, I can't believe this has happened again. First Albert, then Jessica, and now this boy? How many more are there? You've just let these women raise children without the help of a father, so selfish, so lazy, how dare you be such an arrogant bastard!" Judy was saying. "Does your wife know about this? Diana left when she found out about Jessica, you don't want Susannah to do the same thing, do you?" Boone was completely confused and alienated. He had no idea who any of these people were, but it was becoming more and more clear to Boone that he wasn't as important as he had thought – Albert and Jessica, were they other kids just like Boone? Did they all have the same eyes? Judy continued to fiercely yell at her brother, while Abigail started a conversation with Steve. Minutes before, he had felt like he was some animal in a zoo being gawked at, but now he felt invisible. Shannon had seemed to assimilate into the dynamics of the family amazingly quickly, but Boone stuck out sharply, standing all alone. Suddenly, the door to the hallway opened, and everyone was quiet, except Lilly, who was ignorant to what was going on.

"And this is Cinderella, her dress is blue…" she was explaining to Shannon, pointing to a picture in her book, her voice trailing off. Susannah stepped into the front room, her eyes bloodshot, but it looked like she had washed her face and was fairly emotionally stable.

"Boone," she said, "I'm sorry about earlier, I was just shocked. Um, I'm Susannah, I haven't properly introduced myself," she smiled weakly, and Boone shook her hand. "I'd been warned about this from them," she told Sam, her mouth drawn into a thin, angry line. "Judy warned me, Abigail warned me, hell, even Steve warned me!" Steve turned around from the soup, frowning slightly at Susannah, but then turning back towards the stove, even more oblivious than Lilly. "Thank god you told me about your other kids, even though you haven't _spoken_ to them since we met." Sam looked at his feet guiltily. "_Five years_, Boone, I've known him five years and he didn't even bother to tell me about you." Boone nodded, an uncomfortable feeling becoming apparent in his chest. If Sam had another long-lost child like Boone, _two_, who he hadn't kept in touch with, then there wasn't much hope for Boone, was there?

"I'm sorry," Boone said to her. "I came at a bad time, and… I should have called. I really didn't mean to ruin your whole evening or upset you."

Susannah smiled. "You're very sweet. But you shouldn't apologize, I can only imagine what it's been like for you to grow up without a father."

"Thank you," Boone answered quietly.

Susannah nodded quickly. "Sam, we'll talk about this later," There was a dangerous edge to her voice.

"The soup is done," Steve said, as his first words of the evening. Steve was a short, overweight man with rosy cheeks, who would have looked like Santa Claus had he had white hair and a beard instead of wire-rimmed glasses and black hair. "Should we get started? Is there enough food for them as well?" He signaled towards Shannon and Boone.

"Get started with what?" Boone asked, and Shannon looked similarly confused.

"It's Friday," Judy said flatly, making Boone feel incredibly stupid and unworthy, but Shannon's face still appeared perplexed. "Shabbat dinner?" She exhaled in frustration, and Boone wanted to stand up for Shannon, who looked slightly hurt.

"You're Jewish?" Boone asked.

"Got something wrong with that?" Judy turned furiously towards Boone.

"No," Boone said quickly, "Not at all. I just didn't know."

"Guess that makes you half Jewish," Sam put his hand on Boone's shoulder in a stereotypically fatherly gesture, which just made Boone feel more uncomfortable.

"Sit down, Sweetheart," Abigail, Sam's father, or Boone's grandmother, or whoever she was, beckoned for Boone to sit next to her. "Judy, could you get Shannon a chair, please?" Judy rolled her eyes, but obeyed her mother's orders.

"Shannon, could you pass the potatoes?" Susannah asked Shannon about a half an hour later. After the prayers, which Boone or Shannon didn't understand any of, they just stared blankly at each other as everyone, including Lilly, looked somberly at their plates, they had begun to eat, and nobody had spoken, except Lilly, who had talked about her drawings and how Shannon was her "new friend". Everyone had smiled softly at the little girl, remembering how life used to be so simple and how open children were to new people in their lives.

"Sure," Shannon passed the potatoes to Boone, who in turn passed them to Susannah.

"Thanks," Susannah muttered.

"So, Boone, I take it Sabrina got married?" Sam broke the relative silence.

"Yeah," Boone said, looking up into eyes that were identical to his own, "She married Adam, Shannon's dad."

"I was eight and he was ten," Shannon elaborated.

"Oh," Sam nodded. "So, you're about… seventeen?" He asked Boone.

"Uh huh," Boone nodded, insulted that his father barely knew how old his son was. Worse, Sam didn't look guilty about it or anything.

"Mommy I gotta go potty," Lilly burst out suddenly, and Judy excused herself, taking her daughter to the bathroom with her.

"How's Sabrina doing? She's made it pretty big in the wedding business, hasn't she?" Sam asked once Judy had left the table.

"Yeah, she's really successful. She has to travel a lot for business, though."

"Does she… know you're here?" Sam asked slowly.

"No," Boone said finally, after Shannon had kicked him under the table, forcing him to answer. "She's in Baja on business. We probably should have told her, but she doesn't like to talk about…" Boone trailed off.

"Well, I don't blame her," Sam said, humbled, and took a spoonful of soup. "Steve, this soup is amazing. Steve is an incredible chef," Sam changed the subject. "He can make even the simplest things taste like pure heaven!"

"So can Boone," Shannon blurted out. "His milkshakes are so freaking good you wouldn't believe it, and – "

"Shannon," Boone silenced his sister, embarrassed.

"No!" Abigail exclaimed, "Please continue, honey!" Shannon smiled victoriously at Boone.

"Anyway, he makes soup, too. When I'm sick, he makes me this really soothing, hot chicken soup, and I instantly feel better," she finished.

"That's good," Susannah responded. "So, Boone, do you play any sports?"

"Not right now," Boone said, "But I used to do soccer, and I run a couple times a week."

"Well, I'll have you know," his grandmother added, "Sam was an all-star track runner when he was in high school. He even ranked in the top hundred for state!"

"Well, I'm not very fast, I usually just use the track by my house by myself, not for competition or anything."

"Do _you_ play any sports?" Susannah asked Shannon, just as Judy and Lilly were returning to the table.

"I take ballet and modern dance," Shannon looked proud. "Ballet since I was six, modern since I was eleven."

"That's great," Susannah smiled. "Are you a sophomore? Boone, you're a junior?"

"Yeah," they said simultaneously, causing everyone to laugh. Their laughter seemed to ease the situation, but this was a little difficult, because Judy kept giving Boone judgmental looks, and Susannah kept shooting Sam some glares as well.

"What's your favorite subject?" Asked Sam.

"Um," Boone thought. "I'm not sure, maybe English. I'm taking essay expo right now."

"Oh," Sam said, "Well, I'm not much of a writer, I'm a math teacher at the community college."

"That's interesting," Boone nodded, and he was painfully aware of Shannon's watching him.

"What do you want to be when you grow up?" Abigail asked him, the unavoidable adult question.

"I have _no_ idea, honestly," Boone said. "I like English and all, but I don't know if I like it enough to major in it, or anything like that. I need to think about it."

"What colleges are you applying to?" Susannah asked.

"The UC's, probably, and also USC and NYU in New York."

"Wow," Judy sounded impressed for the first time that night.

"Do you have a girlfriend?" his grandmother asked, winking in a way that made Shannon snort into her soup. Boone glared at his stepsister.

"Yeah," he said awkwardly.

"What's she like?" Sam asked, interested.

"Um," Boone laughed, "She's… nice?"

"Anna's not _nice_," Shannon smiled good-naturedly.

"Hey! You shouldn't talk about your best friend that way," he grinned back, but he looked away before their dynamic was given away to the group.

"Whose up for dessert?" Steve stood up, changing the subject, accidentally jostling the table.

"I'll help clear the dishes," offered Boone, and Shannon volunteered as well. It almost felt like this was his real family – if Sam's sister hadn't been eyeing him beadily, or if he hadn't been watching the way Shannon's hips moved as he followed her into the kitchen, or if he hadn't just met his father an hour ago.

_ I hope that was okay. I sort of based the family get together on how my family get-togethers are, except the characters are different. And even though I'm Jewish, we don't do Shabbat, because I'm not **that **Jewish. Anyway, please review, again, I really hope it was good… bites fingernails so please tell me what you liked and didn't like! Were there too many characters? I think there might have been. _


	13. Chapter 13

**_Tangled Youth _**

**Chapter 13 **

It was late – probably around ten or eleven, Boone thought, as he sat on the couch in his father's living room, Shannon half-asleep on his shoulder, her fine blonde hair fanned out over his chest. On the other side of the room, his father was sitting next to Susannah, speaking quietly to her. Boone watched his mannerisms subtly. Sabrina had been right, he certainly seemed to be charming Susannah out of her anger. He touched her arm, her shoulder, and finally, her cheek as he addressed her in a whisper. Boone couldn't hear what she was saying, but he kept having disturbing flashes in his head – he could imagine his mother in the same position, sitting in front of Sam, being consoled the same way. But Boone didn't know if this memory was real, or just a shard of his imagination.

Sam kissed his wife goodnight, and she stood up, smiling, and headed towards the bedroom. Judy had driven Abigail back to the old-folks home where she lived, and Lilly, her, and Steve were staying in the guest bedroom for the night. Next to Boone, Shannon stirred, hoisting herself up against Boone's shoulder, and he tried not to shiver when he felt her breasts brush over his arm. _You have a girlfriend_, he reminded himself. _Yeah, but you also have a **sister**_, the other part of his brain argued.

Sam sat in the chair across from Boone's spot on the couch. There was an invisible barrier between them – seventeen years of separate lives, but their feet shared the same carpet and the same genes. "I thought we could talk for a while," Sam said, looking at Shannon next to him.

"Yeah," Boone agreed, eager to finally get an insight about his father.

"So," Sam started, "What has Sabrina said about me?"

"Nothing," Boone said truthfully. "She won't talk about you."

"How'd you find me?"

"I think that my stepfather, her dad," he gestured towards Shannon, who sighed. "I think he might have put the address somewhere where he knew I'd find you."

"Oh," Sam nodded. "Interesting."

"What happened with you and my mother?" Boone blurted out, right as Shannon stretched out her legs and used his lap as her pillow.

"What do you mean?" Sam asked.

"I mean, like… why won't she talk about you? Why haven't you tried to find me? You knew about me, right?"

"Yeah, I did," Sam looked down. "Your mother and I met when she was taking one of my classes – over the summer, to get some of her college requirements over with. I was… intrigued by her determination and independence. She was a few years younger than me, but we dated for a while and then she got pregnant. You were born, and I was late to the hospital. I stayed in the hospital for a few minutes, and she was ecstatic. But then I went to the bathroom, and I thought, what am I doing? I mean, Diana was just waiting at home, she didn't know I'd been planning to leave her, and I realized that my loyalty belonged to her, not Sabrina."

Boone looked at the floor, all the eagerness in his face that had existed there moments ago gone. He looked up, his expression pained. "Diana?" He reported, his voice sore and bitter.

"My wife. Ex-wife." Sam said matter-of-factly.

"You left her – in the hospital?" He choked. "She didn't know about your… _wife_?" _Oh my god_, he thought, suddenly wishing for the warmth and consistency of his life with his mother. He wished he was young again, before he knew about all of this, before all of these complications with Shannon. He wished that he was still the four-year-old who went to Denny's and had omelets for dinner with his mother - before she wore Armani suits every day, before her business, before everything. Now there was nothing but pity in his heart for his mother.

But the mother he was imagining was the one that had existed long ago, with the flyaway brown hair and the wide grin, not anything like the polite, business-like smile that rarely appeared on her face anymore. Now, his mother was someone else – with her blonde highlighted hair that endured a blow-out every morning from her hairstylist, her Louis Vuitton briefcase made of only the finest leather… but was it all just a determined rebellion against the man who had so suddenly abandoned her?

"I'm really sorry," Sam's face quivered, almost as if he was going to cry. "It was a lose-lose situation."

"And what did – _Diana_," he spat the name out as if it were a curse word, "How did your _wife_ feel about the child support bills that came to your house every month? Or did you ever get them? You never responded, did you?"

"Boone," his father put his head in his hands, "I'm terribly sorry. I can't even tell you how sorry I am. But that was the past, and there's nothing I can do about it anymore. Please forgive me," there was a strain in his voice, a familiar strain that Boone had heard in his own voice before.

"What about your other kids?" Boone asked, his voice a little softer than it had been before. "You haven't seen them in five years?"

"That's a different situation," Sam looked up, earnestly saying, "But Boone, you're my son. You're my son, and there's nothing more to it. I want to know about you, I want to know about the people important to you," He gestured towards Shannon. "I should have been around for the past sixteen years, but I wasn't, and I wish I could change that, but I can't. So please. Just talk to me."

Boone paused, not sure what to say. But what did he have to lose? "Okay," he said finally.

"Good," Sam looked relieved. "So, tell me about yourself."

"I'm seventeen," he started, as if he were introducing himself. "My birthday is on November 14th, 1983. I'm a junior in high school, and I go to Catholic school, even though we're not religious." Boone instinctively placed his hand on Shannon's back, and rubbed small circles between her shoulder blades. Sam looked at him, but Boone didn't notice. "Um," he hesitated, "Shannon, she's a sophomore, we go to the same school, and she's…" Boone tried to think of a word to describe her. "She's amazing," is what came out, and his mouth dropped open. That hadn't been what he had meant to say.

"She seems like a very nice girl," Sam agreed, but the expression in his eyes displayed a deeper understanding.

"When her and her dad moved in, everything changed. I mean, I was an only child one day, and then I had a sister. Everything changed when I saw her."

Sam nodded. "You're in love with her," he said softly. "Aren't you?" He didn't say the words critically, he said them in a way that was… understanding.

Boone looked down. "Um," he bit his lip. "Why don't you tell me about _yourself_?"

"There's not much to say," Sam shrugged. _Of course there is_, Boone thought, _just not anything flattering_. "I've been teaching calculus at the community college for nineteen years, I've been married to Susannah for five. I'm the only person in my family who likes football. I like to read historical books."

Boone was becoming increasingly frustrated. Was he the only one who seriously wanted something out of this relationship? He wished Shannon would wake up, because he longed to be back home in his bed, before he had this new knowledge. But maybe… maybe his father really was this simple. "Tell me about your friends," there was a warmth in his eyes that made Boone want to tell more, though.

"I don't have that many close friends. I have a friend named Kevin who I hang out with at school, a couple other people from camp, and Shannon." He glanced lovingly at the peaceful girl in his lap.

"And you said you had a girlfriend?"

"Yeah," Boone looked up. "Anna."

"And?" Sam beckoned for Boone to elaborate.

"She's Shannon's best friend, actually, which is a little awkward I guess," he began. _And when we're in bed, I pretend she's Shannon_, he added silently. More than a little awkward. "She's gorgeous, she's a model, actually. She's pretty funny, and very outspoken."

Sam nodded. "I used to date a lot of beautiful girls in my day," He said reflectively.

"I'm sure you did," Boone responded bitingly.

"Boone," Shannon stirred in his lap, and she murmured, without opening her eyes, "What time is it?"

"I don't know, let me check." He started to stand up, but Sam took the liberties of standing up to check the clock. "11:30," he told Boone, sitting down. "I guess it's getting late."

"Yeah," Boone said, hoping that Sam would invite him back for another visit.

"You should come back to visit," Sam said ineffectually.

"Yeah," Boone smiled in relief, ignoring the flippant manner of his voice. "Shan, we're going to go home now," he said quietly to his sister.

"Can you carry me?" She asked, sounding small and helpless.

"Of course," he agreed, even though she was pretty heavy.

"You can borrow a blanket for her," Sam offered understandingly, locating a small blanket from a closet nearby and handing it to Boone. "Keep it as long as you want." Boone stood up, placing a steady grip under Shannon's thighs so that he wouldn't drop her. He could have sworn he heard hints of a moan when he slid his hands around her hips. But the lack of a suspicious look from his father proved that it had been his imagination. He wrapped the blanket around Shannon's shoulders and she drew it closer around herself in a stupor. "So," he said to his father. "See you around, I guess?"

"I'll invite you to come over sometime. Happy to see you whenever," Sam smiled.

"Okay," Boone wasn't sure whether or not to hug the man, so he compromised by shaking his hand. When he reached the car, he opened the door and sat Shannon in the passenger's seat. Walking around the front of the car towards the driver's seat, he was shocked to see a looming figure by the dumpster, and relieved to see that it was just Sam's sister, Judy, taking out the trash.

Judy shook her head sadly, and walked towards Boone. "Honey," she said, her tone somewhere between apologetic and calculating – he couldn't interpret it. "I'm sorry, but it's just not going to happen. You're not the first person this has happened to, you know."

"I know," Boone said, making a move to get into his car.

"Boone, wait," Judy said. "I'm serious. First, there was Albert. Sam claimed he didn't know, but we knew that he had just knocked up some slut from east LA and split. We all knew. Even my mother, but she doesn't like to accept the fact that her son is an arrogant, irresponsible bastard, does she? _No,_ but still, some kid comes to the door one day, and Sam claims he's going to have a relationship with him, and we never heard from him again. I don't know what happened." Boone sighed, overwhelmed by this information, but Judy continued. "But I _know_ what happened with Jessica – her mother was only sixteen, and Sam was a good ten years older… Allie was poor, and Sam promised her he would stay with her and they'd make do. But he didn't even make it through the responsibility of having a kid, or being married, for two years. He left on Jessica's second birthday, and the girl comes to the house about six years ago, asking for money. I was there, and I could tell there was something wrong with her – she was fifteen, running away from home, and she stayed on the couch for a week. Then Sam kicked her out, and basically paid her a bunch of money to get lost. He's my brother, and I love him, but he's scum." Boone looked at her in disbelief. She could be lying, she was wrong, he argued with himself, but deep down, he knew she was right. "He's not going to call you, Boone. I'm sorry."

Boone nodded curtly at the woman, biting his lip, and stepped into his car, slamming the door behind him. He tried to stop the tears that were appearing in his eyes, but he couldn't resist, and as he pulled out of the driveway, his face glistened with tears. As he drove down the street, he began to cry harder – damn, he hadn't had a good cry in a while, and after a significant choking sob, he decided to pull over, as his tears were blurring his vision.

"Boone…" Shannon rolled over towards him, and leaned over to hug him. He hugged back, much too strong and much too long, but she didn't seem to mind, rubbing his back slowly until he calmed down. Shannon kissed his cheek after hestopped crying, and turned over, quickly falling asleep.Even after what Judy had said, and what a flake his father seemed like, there was still a glimmer of hope that Sam would call.

_Hope you liked it! Please review and tell what you liked and didn't like! What did you think of Boone and Sam's conversation? _


	14. Chapter 14

_OH MY GOD! I'M SO STUPID! I said that Boone should get a hysterectomy instead of like the guy kind. And it was a joke, so you know I'm just going to get rid of it all together. Thanks, Marissa811._

**_Tangled Youth _**

**Chapter 14 **

"Damnit!" Anna exclaimed, approaching him after school one day in the parking lot of their school about two months after he visited his father. He hadn't called, but Boone had immersed himself with school, running, and Anna for the past months to distract himself from thinking about it. And since nobody knew, he couldn't very well talk about it with anyone but Shannon, who had been behaving rather withdrawn lately.

"Actually, it's Boone, but that works, too." He said, half smiling at her. Anna stood on her tiptoes and kissed Boone lightly on the lips. She tasted like a mix between perfume and smoke, which wasn't an especially pleasant aroma, so he pulled away when she tried to deepen the kiss.

"Oh my god," her mood changed again. "Fuck, fuck, fuck."

"What's the matter?" He asked, not sure whether to be amused or sympathetic.

"Crap," she said, handing him a tie-dyed messenger bag she used as a backpack. "Hold this," Anna reached inside the bag. "Where the fuck is my lighter? I need a…" Anna pulled out a container of cigarettes and lit up. So that explained the smell of smoke.

"Uh, Anna?" He pointed out.

"I can't believe that fucking hermaphrodite nun, sister fucking Mary, or whatever the fucking hell that bitch's name is, failed me in PE!" She took a drag on her cigarette, exhaling in frustration.

"Anna?" Boone interrupted, pointing to the cigarette.

"What, you want one?" She asked, completely oblivious.

"_No_, I don't _want_ one," he responded. "Since when do you smoke?" He looked at her seriously. "This isn't one of your teenage rebellion things, is it?"

"No, _father_, it's not. Oh, that sounded a little kinky, didn't it?" She smirked, taking another drag of the cigarette. She kept talking. "Anyway, why the fucking hell would she fail me? It's _PE_, for fuck's sake!" She inhaled on the cigarette and breathed out.

"Maybe because you never dress for PE?" He guessed.

"You're my boyfriend, you're _supposed_ to be on my side!" She took two frustrated puffs of her cigarette, which burned out. She stomped the cigarette butt to the ground.

"I _am_ on your side, Anna," he said.

"Why don't we go to my house, and you make me feel better?" She said seductively, standing on her tiptoes and kissing him on the ear. When he didn't respond, she took her lighter back out her bag along with another cigarette. She attempted to light up. "Shit…" she whined, when the lighter wouldn't light, but she finally got it

"Anna, when the hell did you pick up smoking?" He asked, finally fed up, an edge to his voice.

"When the hell did you pick up being an asshole?" She shot back. "I mean, you're supposed to want to have s –"

"I thought I asked you to stop – " He ignored her comment, interrupting her. Sure, he wasn't being that nice right now, but he never argued with her, and he was just plain fed up.

"You asked me to stop drinking," she pointed out, inhaling deeply on the cigarette and exhaling exaggeratedly. "So what the hell else was I supposed to do?"

"Um… none of the above?"

"Well, I have to do something to piss off my parents, so I went through a list of things I could do: you know, drinking, smoking, drugs, incest, all that. But I already did the drinking thing, drugs make you ugly, and my brother is two, so I guess I'm going to smoke now."

"Anna," he grabbed the cigarette from her, not sure how to hold it (he had never smoked one cigarette in his entire life), so he dropped it and stomped on it.

"Boone, what the hell?" She rolled her eyes, looking pissed. "I'm getting a ride home from Danny."

"_Who_?" he said, but Anna had already stomped off.

* * *

Boone didn't see Shannon that afternoon until he was reading before he went to sleep, lying on his bed comfortably with the bedside table lamp on. Shannon wordlessly slipped into bed next to him, laying her head on his chest, her eyes closed peacefully, but her expression conflicted.

"You sick?" He asked, putting down the book he was reading for school and putting his hand on her forehead to see if she had a fever.

"Physically or emotionally?" She mumbled into his t-shirt.

"What happened? Did Pam say something at ballet _again_?" He ran his fingers through her hair, concerned, but also wanting to comfort her.

Shannon wiggled a little under his touch. "Nuh uh," she responded.

"Does that mean yes or no?" He asked, smiling down at his sister sympathetically.

"Nnuh," she mumbled, burying her head deeper into his chest. "Amdinsiything."

"Wanna say that again in English?" He asked patiently.

"She didn't say anything, alright? Believe it or not, not everything I care about has to do with appearance!" She snapped, starting to stand up.

"Shannon, I'm sorry, okay? Don't leave, just…"

"I'm just closing the door," she rolled her eyes. "Sabrina's in her office." Shannon gestured for him to scoot closer to the wall, and he obliged. He lay down, and she snuggled in next to him.

"Has he called yet?"

"What?"

"Sam? Has he called?" She clarified.

"What do you think?" Boone said bitterly.

"He didn't call? God damn him!" She swore, her voice hitching dramatically. "You don't deserve that, Boone." She ran her hand down his arm, toned from the exercise he forced himself through for the acceptance of his peers. "We don't deserve this."

"What do you mean, 'we'?" He asked, confused. He turned over on his side so that he was facing the wall.

"Do you know what today is?" She lowered her voice, flicking off the light on the bedside table.

"What?"

"It's May 12th."

"May 12th?" He wondered how this pertained to the conversation they were having.

"Yeah," she suddenly sniffled.

"Hey, what's wrong?"

"At least your dad is alive!" She cried, tears streaming down her face and dripping onto his t-shirt. "My mother's dead! _Dead_, dead, dead!" She pounded on the bed, suddenly hysterical.

"Shannon," he tried to console her. "Hey! Shannon!" She stopped pounding, and he turned towards her, noticing her eyes were filled with tears. She looked so tiny and pathetic, he couldn't help but draw her into his arms and kiss her forehead. Slowly, her hysterical cries subsided into soft whimpers.

"Boone," she whispered, removing herself from his embrace. Boone turned around again towards the wall. "Boone," she repeated, hoisting herself up against his back so that her mouth was even with his ear. "I need to tell you something about my mom." She breathed against his skin, causing Boone to shiver. "I need to tell you what happened to her."

"Okay," he agreed, a little nervous about what she was going to say. Was she finally going to open up about what had happened? "Why now?"

"God, I miss you," she went on a tangent, ignoring his question but Boone liked this one as well. "I miss hanging out with you all the time, you know? I mean, now you're always with Anna… not that I mind or anything, but.. you know." Boone felt a wave of guilt pass over him.

"Anyway, what I was going to tell you." She moved even closer, moving her lips against his ears at each syllable change in her words. If he tried hard enough, he could imagine that the n's and s's, g's and t's were not words, but tiny kisses. "We had breakfast that morning together. It was Fruit Loops, and my dad never let me have Fruit Loops, so she hid them in the cupboard where he wouldn't find them, and when he left early for work, we'd eat them. It was like… our little secret." Her hand brushed over his thigh, and he wasn't sure if she had done it on purpose or not.

"Yeah," he nodded, alerting her that he was listening.

"I went to school with the carpool. My best friend at the time, Allie, her mom drove us. She wasn't a very pretty mom. Not like my mom." She smiled against his ear, and the exhale of her breath triggered the hairs on his neck to stand up. "You cold?" She asked him, wrapping the comforter tighter around them.

"No, I'm fine. Keep going."

"I went to pre-school, and we made masks. All of the boys made monsters, and the girls made Disney princesses as their masks. My princess looked like my mom." Boone swallowed. He knew this story was going to end badly. "After school, I went home." Her voice quivered, and she grabbed onto Boone's arms, the indents of her fingers causing white half-moons to appear on his wrists. "Opened the door. Called for my mom. No one answered." She placed her hands on Boone's shoulders, coaxing him to turn over so that she was facing him. "So," she sniffled, "I went upstairs and I thought she would be in the bathroom." Boone wrapped his arms around Shannon, knowing she needed emotional support. She pulled herself closer to him, until she was flush against him. _Oh shit_, he thought, why did his dumbass hormones have to come in to play _now_? When his sister needed him most, his body was insisting on being this huge pervert. Shannon didn't mention his not so subtle erection, but she didn't move away either, which wasn't doing much to help the situation.

"She was in the bathroom," Shannon continued. "But…" she pulled back a bit, looking up into his eyes, their faces level with each other. "She was dead on the floor." Shannon's tears came in halting, dramatic, uncontrolled sobs now, and Boone had no idea how to react. God, he thought, he knew the story would be bad, but for a little kid to find her mother dead on the floor, all alone… suddenly Boone felt stupid for pitying himself with his father situation. "And then I found the pills."

"What?" This story just kept getting worse and worse.

"A whole bottle of them, and it was all empty. I don't know what it was, but I guess it didn't work," she cried, "because there was a knife – not a small razor like she usually used, but a huge," another blubbering sob, "kitchen knife, and it was covered in blood. Dad used to use it to slice these huge loaves of sourdough bread we used to buy." Boone felt close to tears himself, experiencing her pain almost as if it had happened to himself. "Her arms were covered, absolutely streaked in blood."

She was quiet for a moment. "Oh my god, I've never told anyone that before." Her eyes widened, and she stared up at Boone. "I've never told anyone that before," she repeated, and mumbled the phrase again, moving even closer to him, until their lips were against each others. Boone froze at the sudden realization of this, and they stayed in this position for a few moments – touching but not moving their lips in order to evolve the gesture into a kiss. But then he found himself moving his lips ever so slightly, laying a tiny butterfly kiss on Shannon's lips. He pulled back, ashamed.

"Oh my god, I'm so sorry," he apologized profusely, but Shannon quieted him with another minuscule touch of her lips to his. The kiss lasted less than a second, but they had just crossed an invisible barrier they had set up between them. One kiss, without tongue, wasn't exactly normal in this context, but it wasn't abnormal either. It was still okay. But now it was different. And now there was no turning back.

Even though his mind was saying _no, this is wrong_, his body was clearly saying yes, and they continued laying airy kisses on each other's lips. Her lips were soft, warm, and perfect, just like he had imagined them to be, and moved more gracefully that Anna's lips. Gradually, the kisses stopped being gentle and chaste and began to segue into deeper, more passionate kisses. Her mouth was beginning to open, and her hand was crawling around the back of his neck, pulling him even closer towards him.

Boone wasn't thinking. He was delirious, he convinced himself, because under no circumstance would he _ever_ do this with his sister, especially while he had a girlfriend. But any thoughts of Anna, of his mother hearing, or of reality, were pushed out of his head, because his entire brain was consumed with the goodness of her kisses.

Soon, he felt her tiny tongue lightly tickle his lips, as if she were beckoning for him to open his own mouth. Seamlessly, the kiss went from a tiny peck to an intense kiss of desperate desire. When his tongue finally brushed against hers, she shivered, and rolled over so that she was half on top of him, her hands still not straying from around his neck. Then he turned over so that he was leaning across her, and dared to kiss her even more deeply. A barely audible moan escaped her lips, but to Boone, it was like air to his lungs. God, if there was anything he needed, anything he wanted _at all_ in his life, it was this. He wanted Shannon, and he wanted her all to himself. But it was just… so wrong. They were supposed to be siblings, they were supposed to be… But then he was distracted when Shannon gently coaxed him over onto his back, and softly pressed her lips against his again. The tongue that came next was inevitable, but still intoxicating.

"Siblings don't usually do this, do they?" She asked, practically gasping. Maybe it meant that some of the euphoria that he felt, maybe she felt it too.

"No," he answered sadly, as if he were announcing that someone had just died. Oh god! Suddenly, Boone felt even worse, here they were, making out, when Shannon had just told the horrendous story of Camilla committing suicide. This was just – wrong!

She kissed him one last time, luxuriously and questioning, daring to explore his mouth even further. Then she backed away, rolling to her other side. "Wh – what are you going to tell Anna?" She asked flatly after about a minute of silence.

"I don't know," Boone said slowly, but he knew exactly what he needed to do.

_OMG they finally made out! Yay! Please tell me what you thought, all that jazz, but review because it makes me HAPPY! _


	15. Chapter 15

**_Tangled Youth _**

**Chapter 15 **

Boone stood in the kitchen the next morning, not remembering why he was there. He and Shannon had only kissed for a few minutes, and he had woken up alone, but the few moments he had shared with her loomed over his head in a thick cloud that refused to disappear. And it was all he could think about.

"Good morning, sweetheart." Sabrina looked up from her copy of the Wall Street Journal, smiling briefly at her son. "What are you doing?"

Boone looked at her, startled – he hadn't noticed that she was there. "Uh," he tried to think of why. He glanced at the clock, which read 7:23 AM. Of course. Breakfast. "I was just going to make myself some cereal."

"Okay, I bought some granola yesterday," Sabrina turned the page of her newspaper, taking a sip of coffee. "Where's Shannon?" Boone thought he had heard her name in his head, so he tried to ignore it and took the box of granola out of a cupboard, grabbing an apple out of the fruit basket and trying to find a knife. "_Boone_? Where's Shannon?"

"Huh?" Boone started, caught off guard. "I don't know," his voice sounded petulant.

"Why are you being rude to be, _honey_?" His mother asked him, her lips creating a thin, angry line.

"I'm not, I'm sorry, okay?" He began to slice his apple.

"Well you know how she sleeps through her alarm, and you usually wake her up, so I thought that – " But Boone didn't have to answer her, because just then, Shannon, dressed with her hair and makeup done perfectly, all signs of last night's vulnerability completely gone.

"Sabrina," Shannon sounded surprised to see her stepmother in the kitchen. "What are you doing here?"

"I live here, Shannon, so be civil for once and pretend you don't hate me." Shannon sighed, and got an orange from the fruit basket, looking at Boone for a moment. Boone didn't look back, afraid that he wouldn't be able to tear his eyes away. "If you two could sit down, I need to talk to you." Boone dropped the knife he was using to cut the apple. Had Sabrina heard? Shannon rolled her eyes, sitting on a chair and putting her feet on the chair across from it. "Shannon, don't put your feet on the furniture." Shannon stomped her feet back to the ground begrudgingly. Boone put the apple slices into his granola, along with some milk, and took the bowl to the table, sitting next to Shannon. He glanced at her, and with the glance he remembered her crying eyes, her lips, the feel of her tongue. He remembered the story of her mother, wondering why she had insisted on keeping it to herself for so long.

"This summer, I have a big job in Sydney, Australia. It'll be huge for the business, but it requires me to be there for a few weeks."

"Great, we'll be fine on our own." Shannon said abruptly.

"Shannon," Sabrina smiled dangerously. "I was actually thinking, that because it'll be in the summer, that we could make it a family vacation. Of course, I wouldn't be around all that much, andAdam is only going for a week because he has a case, but it would be fun to get a change of scenery. And I hear that Sydney's beautiful." Boone was extraordinarily relieved. She _didn't _know.

"I've always wanted to go to Australia," he said.

"Sure," Shannon shrugged, but Boone could tell she was hiding her enthusiasm. "Whatever. When are we going?"

"June twentieth until July third," Sabrina said.

"But that means I'll be jet-lagged for all the July 4th parties!" Shannon argued.

"You'll _live_," Sabrina said, "We're going, and I'm not asking your permission, Shannon."

"Okay," Shannon said, taken aback.

"Oh, it's 7:30," Sabrina looked at the clock, standing up. "I need to get to work." Once Sabrina's heels had clicked out of the kitchen, the silence between Shannon and Boone became tension-filled and palpable.

"So," Boone started, "I thought that we should talk about what happened last night." Shannon looked annoyed.

"We're not making out again," Shannon told him. "I don't know howyou let it happen, but it's not happening again," she said decidedly.

"I… I know," he told her. "But that actually wasn't what I was talking about. About Camilla…"

"What about her?" Shannon asked suspiciously.

"I guess I'm just wondering why you haven't told anyone about her. Or gone to someone or something."

"I'm not going to any fucking shrink," she yelled. "I'm not insane, I don't _need_ anyone!"

"Jesus, Shannon," he took a bite of his granola. "Calm down."

"You think I'm crazy?" Her voice cracked.

"No, Shannon, not just crazy people go to psychiatrists. I just thought you could use someone to talk to, or maybe your dad might have when you were younger. I mean, witnessing your mother committing suicide…"

"Don't talk to me like you know everything about me," she looked away, and Boone instantly felt guilty.

"I'm sorry," he said, ashamed. "I'm sorry," he turned her head towards his, forcing her to look him in the eyes. "I know that it's a really sensitive issue for you, and I was _wrong_ to mention it. I won't do it again if you're not comfortable about – " Shannon shrugged away from his touch. "Sorry," he said again, staring at his bowl of cereal.

"It's okay," she responded, finally after a few minutes. "You're forgiven." She attempted a smile.

* * *

A few minutes later, Shannon and Boone sat in Anna's driveway, waiting for her to come out of her house so that they could drive to school.

"Just _honk_," Shannon insisted from the back seat of his car.

"No, it's rude," he argued, his fingers creeping towards the honk button on the steering wheel. It was tempting, at 7:30 in the morning, to do so, but he had been raised for seventeen years as a polite and cautious child, so he opened the car door and got out, walking up to the van Camp's door. He rang the bell, and after a few seconds, Anna emerged, her left shoe half on.

"Sorry," she said breathlessly, "I was running late." She pulled him towards her and kissed him deeply. She tasted like toothpaste, not cigarettes, this time. But it was strange, now that he and Shannon had kissed like this, Anna's kisses didn't feel as nice anymore. And when they walked back to the car, he noticed that she didn't look as beautiful anymore either. "Look, Boone, I'm sorry about yesterday, too. I was being a bitch, and it won't happen again. Smoking is stupid." Boone agreed, but he wasn't hearing her words. He knew now that he had to break up with her. He just didn't know how he was going to do so.

"Anna?" Boone found her at lunch, surprisingly alone, and she looked delighted to see him. It just made him feel even worse.

"Yeah?" She answered, chipper. "You wanna go get lunch?"

"Actually," he said. "I think we need to talk."

Anna's smile disappeared. "You're really fucking clueless, aren't you? You don't break up with a girl during _school_!" She attempted a smile, but failed.

"Anna," He said apologetically. "Let's go somewhere more private to talk, okay?"

"_Fine_," she followed him outside to the back of the school, and then stood across from him, arms crossed over her chest. "What did I do wrong?"

"N-nothing," he stuttered.

"You're bored of me?" She asked expectantly. Boone opened his mouth. "No? You cheating on me?"

"No," he said, although what he and Shannon had done probably counted.

"Where were you that weekend? When your parents were gone? Why didn't you call me to come over? I mean, most guys would be thrilled at the prospect of spending a weekend wildly fucking their girlfriends, you know?"

"Anna, I'm not cheating on you. I just think that this relationship isn't – "

"Why didn't you call me? What the hell, Boone? Why are you doing this to me? _I_ love you!" She was close to tears now, and Boone had no idea what to do. "You're such an idiot, breaking up with me at _school_. I mean, what kind of fucking heel does that? And why do you always push me away when I kiss you? Why don't you want me?" She cried, randomly blabbering on, pushing Boone towards annoyance. "I know why," she said determinately. "It's _her_, and don't you dare try to deny it. The other night, when we were in your car after the movie? You were taking off my clothes, Boone," she reminded him, "And you want to know what you said? You said, _'Shannon'_! And I ignored you, I thought you might have just accidentally said it, but I was thinking about it yesterday when Danny gave me a ride home, and I realized that it really makes things make sense. Really _fucking great_, Boone!" She spat.

"Anna, stop!" He warned her. "You don't know the first thing about me and Shannon, so –"

"I don't know the first thing about you and Shannon," she scoffed. "Yeah, right. I've been best friends with her since we were ten, and what do you know? I've been sleeping with you for three months, so don't tell me I don't know. Don't tell me that I don't notice that we'll be acting perfectly normal, and then she'll come in, and suddenly you don't care about me anymore." She sniffled. "What am I, some kind of lame substitute? Don't answer that," she held up her hand to stop him. "Where were you that weekend? What were you doing?"

"Look, Anna," although he felt bad that he was letting her down, he also felt that Anna had crossed the line, and as anger welled up inside of him, he had no control over what came out of his mouth next. "Maybe I had more important things to do than fuck _you_!"

Anna choked, looking like she wasn't sure whether to laugh or cry. "You did not just say that," she gasped. "Oh my God, Boone, you just don't _know_. You just don't fucking know." She turned around, starting to walk away.

"That didn't come out right!" He yelled after her. "I'm sorry!"

Anna turned around, smiling slightly. "It's okay, Boone," she said. "We'll be okay."

* * *

After lunch, Boone had PE, and as he walked into the locker room, he got a few strange looks. _Shit_, he thought, did they know about what he had said to Anna? Boone nodded a hello to his fellow students in the locker room, opening his gym locker after spinning the combination 4-8-23. He pulled out his PE shirt, which, like all PE shirts, was oversized and ugly. But the boys in his class were still staring at him. "What?" he finally said.

"You have more important things to do than fuck Anna van Camp?" Jerry, a short stoner asked. "What teenage boy has more important things to do than fuck _her_? She's so fucking hella hot, dude."

Boone looked at Jerry, frowning. "Whatever," he took off his shirt and unzipped his pants, sliding them over his shoes with difficulty.

"I take it you broke up," said Perry, who was tall and had dark, short hair. "What happened?"

Jerry chuckled. "I _wonder_," he rolled his eyes. Just then, Kevin, who was in his PE class, appeared.

"Dude!" Kevin greeted Boone. "You really fucked up, didn't you? More important things to do than…" he trailed off, laughing. Boone was not amused. Humiliated might be a better word to describe how he felt. "If you don't want to fuck her, I will," Kevin continued. God, all they cared about was sex. One of Boone's old babysitters had told Boone that he was an adult in a little kid's body, and it was times like these when he most agreed with her. "I've always kinda had a thing for her."

"Thanks, Kevin, that's really comforting." But that wasn't the worst of Boone's embarrassment for the day.

When he arrived in the gym after changing, all of the girls in the class gawked at him. As he walked by, he heard someone whisper to a friend, "Apparently, he has more important things to do than fuck Anna van Camp. Who the hell does he think he is?"

The ride home from school was liberating – just him and Shannon again, who sat in the front this time and put her legs on the dashboard. He brushed his hand over her bare thigh when he reached over to turn on the radio, and she didn't argue. "She slept with that guy Danny last night, you know," Shannon told him, running her hand across his arm, somewhere between sexual foreplay and feeling bad for him. They didn't say much else for the rest of the car ride.

_So, I'm sure everyone is very happy that Boone and Anna broke up. I liked her, but I think I was the only one. After all, I did create the monster. Please review! The next couple chapters should be fun because they'll be vacationing in Australia! Yay! Also, please check out "Cigarettes and Regrets", a one-shot I wrote about Sawyer. _


	16. Chapter 16

**_Tangled Youth _**

**Chapter 16 **

Over the next few months, Boone put all of his energy into schoolwork. Somehow, he managed to fill his mind with formulas, historical battles, classic literature, and names of chemicals containing ridiculous amounts of syllables. With no girlfriend, barely any friends, and his family barely ever present, it was easy to bear all his concentration into books and tests and projects. It was almost like he was back in middle school again, except he still managed to scrape by on the social hierarchy because of his good looks.

Then there was Shannon. Her life had split into two categories – ballet and boys. With the ballet half came her eating disorder, most of her friends, and stress, and the boy half of her life also included constant partying, obsession with her looks, shopping, and flirting with everything that moved. As the months grew warmer, Shannon took advantage of the weather by wearing skimpier and skimpier clothes – by the beginning of June, she spent most of her free time in a bikini by the pool, working on her tan with Anna. Boone had expected any exchange between him and Anna to be extremely awkward, but it actually seemed pretty normal. It helped, of course, that he wasn't jealous of whatever new boy she was hanging on each week, unlike the boys who Shannon dated.

Whenever Boone saw Shannon kissing, or hugging, or even _laughing_ with a guy, a deep, intense feeling of jealousy pervaded through his entire body, and he had to clench his fists or force his mind to think of something else when he witnessed this. It hardly ever worked, and in the middle of reading Shakespeare or while taking a quiz in pre-calculus, her name would pop into his head, and his fingers would burn with pent-up anger as he thought of whatever guy she was hooking up with. _What were they doing, exactly_? He'd ponder, obsessing about it for hours when he tried to sleep. Or _does he make her do things she doesn't want to_, he would think in the early hours of the morning, when he sat at the kitchen table waiting for her to get home from whatever party she was currently attending.

Also, his relationship with his mother wasn't faring especially well – she was constantly suspicious of him, even though Boone hadn't done anything wrong. Whenever he wasn't doing anything "productive", she would force him into trying a new activity – the suggestion of trying to be a lifeguard again fell flat, he would never, _ever_, attempt that again. But she had also pressured him into interning at her company,so he'd let his mind wander as he filed forms or delivered notices to people around the office. It was just busy work, but it was the only thing about him that his mother seemed to appreciate, and she made it well known to all of her workers that she was "sooooo proud" or "ecstatic" that he was interning there twice a week. The moment they got home, though, it was back to their old ways, and Sabrina would disappear into her office, briefly emerging to have some dinner or yell at Boone. Then she'd go back into her office, and when Shannon arrived home late at night, she would emerge again, claiming that she had been waiting for Shannon to come home, and yell at her until Shannon started crying. "You win," she'd always scream at her stepmother before running upstairs seeking Boone's solace. And while the rest of his junior year in high school blurred together, these little moments with Shannon were the only parts he really remembered.

* * *

"Boone," Boone stirred when he heard a voice next to his bed. "Boone," she said again, putting something in front of his nose. "Wake up and smell the coffee." He sat up groggily, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. "Shannon?" The first thing he saw that morning was a fuzzy image of Shannon, standing in the dark holding a cup of coffee in front of him.

"Yeah, here's some coffee, Sabitcha says we have to leave in 25 minutes. She's yelling," Shannon warned.

"What time is it?" He asked, curling back up on the bed.

"I don't know, like 5:30 AM." She said. "Our flight's not even until eleven, we're going to have so much time with nothing to do." It was June 20th, about a week after school got out, and the morning before their flight. As if this hour even qualified as _morning,_ he thought crudely. "Come on, get your lazy ass out of bed." Boone didn't move. Shannon ripped the sheets away from him, and Boone, in his delirium, thought that it meant Shannon was going to jump him, but unfortunately, she didn't. She did slap him in a not-so appropriate place though. "Get up, asshole." She said, and receded, leaving the room.

Boone crawled out of bed, dragging himself and a change of clothes to the bathroom, where he jumped in the shower and let the cold water wash over him, letting it wake him up. After washing himself, he stepped out of the shower, putting a towel around his waist. Then, he heard a knock on the door, but before he could say anything, Shannon barged in. "Hi," she said, seeming to not notice that he was naked except for a small towel. She stepped towards the mirror and took a mascara out of the drawer by the sink and started putting it on. Excruciatingly slowly, of course.

"Shannon – "

"Oh, finish whatever you were doing," again, she seemed not to notice that he wasn't wearing clothes.

"Shannon – "

"Yes, I packed mouthwash," she responded. Boone sighed in frustration and waddled out of the bathroom, trying desperately to keep the towel on, carry his clothes, and walk into his bedroom at the same time. "If it means that much to you, I'll let you bring the mouthwash!" She called after him. Either she was really stupid, or she really liked to tease him.

* * *

"I cannot _believe_ we have over an hour until boarding," Shannon said to Boone, who was sitting on one of the chairs by their gate. "I mean, there is absolutely _no_ reason why we should get to the airport like 3 hours early! She's so dumb, I think she even typed out an itinerary and even put the exact _times_ on it," Shannon flipped a page of her Seventeen magazine in frustration.

"Be quiet, Shan, she's coming back from the bathroom." Instead of shutting up, Shannon switched her position and leaned against the side rest of the chair, laying her legs across Boone's lap, still engrossed in her magazine.

"This is going to be great – watch this, she's going to _freak_." Shannon said quietly.

"Shannon – " Boone tried to argue, but it was no use.

"Hey Sabrina," said Shannon casually as Sabrina sat across from, opening her mouth to speak, but Shannon got there first. "What do you think of these shoes?" Shannon opened the magazine to a page that displayed a large picture of a stiletto boot that was mercilessly tacky, Boone noticed. He could imagine Anna wearing them.

"Shannon get your legs off of Boone's lap this instant," Sabrina looked humiliated and livid.

"That's okay," Shannon said lazily, "I'm comfortable. I'm not bothering anyone, am I bothering you, Boone?"

"No," he said truthfully. Sure, she was distracting him, but bothering him? Never.

"I am not asking your permission, Shannon. Now _move_."

"Oh my _god_, Sabrina, what is the big deal? I'm not like molesting him or anything." Boone bit back a laugh with difficulty.

"Shannon!" Sabrina raised her voice, catching the attention of a few bystanders. "Listen to me!" Just then, as if on cue, Adam found them, holding a copy of the Economist. Shannon gave Sabrina a dirty look, making sure Adam didn't see. "Shannon, you _will_ quit being a brat and listen to me this instant! I am serious, you _will_ be punished if you don't listen to me!"

"Hey, hey," Adam said, trying to calm Sabrina. While he did so, Shannon removed her legs from Boone's lap. "Calm down." Shannon put on a prize-winning pout for her father.

"I was just sitting here, and then she just pounced on me! I didn't do anything wrong!" Shannon whined to her father.

"Sabrina, is this true?" Adam asked.

"No," Sabrina replied, "Shannon was being insolent."

Adam did not respond, but looked at his daughter, whose face was furrowed in concern convincingly. "Sabrina, you need to give my daughter a break, okay? She's doing her best." Adam sat down, opened his Economist, and began to read. Sabrina stared daggers at Shannon.

"I'll be back in a minute," she snapped, grabbing her purse, and stormed off. Shannon and Boone smirked at each other, trying desperately not to laugh.

"First class flight 151 to Sydney is now boarding," said a voice over the loudspeaker. Shannon, Adam, and Boone all stood up and wheeled their bags to the line, and Sabrina arrived breathless behind them. After they gave the flight attendant their tickets, they walked towards the plane, and down the aisle, and he looked for the seat 8B. He sat down, and he could hear Shannon breathing heavily behind him. She slipped her tote bag underneath the chair in front of them, frantically sitting down next to Boone. Her toes brushed over his leg when she did so, and she reached over him, a fan of blonde hair covering her face, to open the window shade by his seat. Then she closed her eyes, breathing in and out slowly.

"It's okay," Boone said, smiling. "You know, cars are most dangerous than planes, and you're not afraid of cars, are you?" Boone snuck a glance at Adam and Sabrina, who were sitting about a foot away.

"Thanks Boone, now I'm afraid of all methods of transportation." She exhaled.

"You could always walk to Sydney, I suppose." Boone said facetiously.

"Only if you come with me," she opened her eyes, and smiled. "You have my inhalers?" She asked, reaching for his carry-on next to his feet. She picked it up, put it in her lap, and started going through the pockets. "Not here," she noted, haphazardly placing it back next to him. She reached into the pocket of his zip-up sweatshirt, and Boone could feel her nails clawing at his skin through his shirt as she searched through the pocket, where the inhaler was not to be found. "Where is it?" She panicked.

"It's in my other pocket," He said, motioning to the other pocket on his sweatshirt.

"Okay," she didn't reach into this pocket, though.

Shannon and Boone waited for the rest of the people to board the plane, and as the plane started coasting on the runway. "Shit," Shannon swore, grabbing onto Boone's wrist and digging her fingers into him, hard. It hurt, but Boone enjoyed any physical contact they could get. The memory of the night when they had kissed popped into his mind, and he shuddered, staring intently at his hand. As the plane gained altitude, Shannon's death grip loosened, until finally, her hand was just loosely loped around his wrist.

The rest of the plane ride passed in long, boring spurts. Shannon asleep on his shoulder, Shannon getting up to go to the bathroom, giving him a nice view of her legs, Shannon refusing to eat airplane food, Shannon asking Boone which swimsuits he liked in her magazine, and Shannon asleep on his shoulder again. Eventually, Boone began to nod off as well, dozing off against her.

When the seemingly endless plane ride did, in fact, land, Shannon stretched, moving away from him. "We're in Australia!" She exclaimed, excited.

"I know," he smiled at his sister's enthusiasm.

"I'm going to love it here," she said as they took their bags and walked down the aisle of the plane. After they had gone to baggage claim, Shannon had dumped all but one of her bags on Boone, and was still babbling about all of the sites she wanted to see and all of the places she wanted to go until they got outside. "Fuck!" She yelled, and Sabrina glared at Shannon.

"Shannon," Adam scolded.

"Nobody told me it was going to be cold!" She shivered upon realization that it was less than 50 degrees.

"We're in the Southern hemisphere, Shan," Boone explained. "It's winter here."

"Are you _kidding_ me?" Her mouth widened in surprise. "You are fucking kidding me."

"Shannon! Stop swearing, you sound so crude!" Sabrina said shrilly.

"I didn't pack anything warm," Shannon ignored Sabrina. "Oh my god, Boone, what are we going to do?"

"I guess we'll have to go," he said the next word as if it were the most foul cuss word in the English language. "Shopping."

"I guess," Shannon said. "How about tomorrow?"

"No," Sabrina said instantly. "Tomorrow we're going to a nice restaurant for brunch. It has a view of the opera house."

"And what am I supposed to wear? Shorts and a tank top?" Shannon asked.

"Come on," Boone said to his mother. "We can eat there another day."

"The plan isn't set in stone," Adam agreed. "Why don't we just explore the city tomorrow? Besides, you have a meeting in the afternoon."

"_Fine_," spat Sabrina. "Ruin the plans." Just then, their taxi arrived, and Sabrina sat in the front, and Adam, Boone, and Shannon piled into the back. The cab was cramped, so Shannon was squished up against him. She looked so cute and small curled up like that, and Boone couldn't help himself from flirting with her, even in the presence of their parents.

"You're really cold, aren't you?" He asked. She nodded. "Your toes are practically blue," he noted, as she had her legs pulled up against her chest, trying to warm herself in her airy tank top and shorts. He took her left foot and removed her flip-flop. She giggled, and Sabrina looked forward stubbornly. Adam, as usual, didn't really notice, as he was deep in conversation with the driver.

"Could you give me a foot massage?" She asked, and he gladly obliged. As he did so, he looked out the window and took in the scenery outside of his window. So far, the city didn't look all that exotic – in fact, in looked a lot like San Francisco, where he had been quite a few times.

"What's our hotel called again?" Shannon asked her father. Boone pressed his fingers into theheel of her foot.

"Uh," Adam thought. "Sydney Park Plaza Hotel, I believe."

"Okay," Shannon said, and switched feet for Boone to massage.

"Is that alright?" Boone asked.

"Yeah," Shannon said flippantly, and stared out the window as well.

"So, where are you guys from?" Asked the taxi driver, a young man with bleach-blonde hair, in an impeccable Australian accent.

"We're in the vicinity of Los Angeles, California," Sabrina made sure to insert as many syllables into her words to make them sound fancier, Boone noticed.

"Malibu," Shannon specified, "But in the summer we sometimes stay closer to San Diego. Have you ever been to California, um…"

"Trent," replied Trent. "No, I have not been to California, but I've been to the East Coast." He smiled at Shannon. "Is this your first time to Australia?"

"Yeah," said Boone, but it turned out that Adam had been there on business before, and he began to talk to the driver, so Boone tuned out the conversation, concentrating on kneading into the sole of Shannon's foot.

"That feels really good," Shannon said quietly. Sabrina tossed them a death glare, so Boone pulled his hands away, handing her back her flip-flops. "Oh my god!" She suddenly screeched. "It's the bridge! Look, Dad, Boone!" She did not address Sabrina, and they all looked out the window. "And look at the water!" Even in the dark, the water reflected clear and blue. "It's so blue!"

"We're actually passing the Circular Quay right now, it's one of Sydney's main ports for ferries," said the taxi driver.

"Do you know what the weather is going to be like for the next few days?" Shannon asked.

"Well, it should be pretty crisp," Trent replied. "It's summer in the US right now, is it?"

"Yeah," Shannon answered. "I accidentally packed all summer clothes."

"Well, it's warm year-round up north in Queensland. Are you guys going to the barrier reef while you're here?"

"No, I'm here for work," Sabrina said coldly. "There isn't time for a separate plane ride up there."

Shannon pouted. "_I_ wanted to go there. What if Boone and I take a side trip up there?"

Adam laughed. "I don't think you're step-mother is going to allow that. And frankly, neither will I."

"Maybe you can come with us, then!" Shannon begged her father. "Just for a few days!"

"Well," reasoned Adam.

"The airfares will be outrageous!" Sabrina cut in. "We have plans, we have an itinerary, we're not going to change it, and that is final, _Shannon_."

"Dad…" Shannon whined. She elbowed Boone, trying to get him to stand up for her.

"Um," Boone said out loud. "That way you'll have more time to work with less distraction."

Just then, Trent pulled into the hotel driveway. "Here we are," he said. "That will be $50. Australian dollars, of course." Adam paid Trent, who helped them with their bags, but Sabrina had already stormed inside to check in.

"Wonder what's wrong with your mom," Shannon wondered. Boone looked towards the lobby.

"I don't know," he said. "Hope she's okay." Shannon changed the subject.

"Damn, that flight was long," she complained, pulling her cell phone out of the pocket of her short denim shorts. "Anna called." She noted, checking her messages. She listened to the voicemail. "She says she misses being your girlfriend. And that drummers aren't very good in bed."

"_Great_," Boone said sarcastically, never surprised at Anna's audacity.

"Oh, and here's another from my _friend_, Gabe." She said slowly, and Boone knew that she was teasing him. He still couldn't help but twinge with jealously. Shannon laughed as she listened to the voicemail. "He's so funny," Shannon smiled as she closed her cell phone. "Oh, don't worry, big brother, I promise that you're _funnier_." She touched him lightly on the arm, and scampered towards the hotel lobby. "Funnier looking," she added. "Take my bag, will you?"

"No," he said, but she was already inside, so, sighing, he carried her bag inside for her.

_Sorry that was a little boring, but I hope it was okay. I am looking forward to the next chapter though! And remember - the review button is your friend. ;)_


	17. Chapter 17

**_Tangled Youth _**

**Chapter 17 **

Over the next few days, Sabrina was a slave driver – forcing Shannon, Boone, and Adam to numerous museums, aquariums, and shows, most of which she did not actually attend. She was so intent on keeping Boone and Shannon out of trouble that she crammed their days so full that by the evening they had no desire whatsoever to sneak out or do anything. Still, Shannon _loved_ Australia, although the Italian opera at the Sydney Opera House was a low point, and she claimed that she was going to move to Australia when she was older, or at least live there for a while. Shannon was still eager about going to Queensland, where it was warm, and they could go to beaches and swim and snorkel at the Great Barrier Reef. And somehow, she swindled her father into convincing Sabrina to take them there for four days, and then they would travel home straight from the Cairns Airport, while Sabrina would go on a separate plane. Sabrina wasn't happy about this decision, and Boone could tell every time they ate together or went on an excursion – the piercing looks she was constantly giving her were a subtle hint of Sabrina's feelings about the matter.

"Boone," Shannon said to him as they got ready for bed in their hotel room separate from Adam's two nights before they were set to depart Australia. She was currently changing into her pajamas, thoughtlessly peeling off her banana yellow tank top and going through her bag for a pajama top. Since Boone tended to overanalyze everything, he was actually disappointed that she changed in front of him – it meant that she was so comfortable around him, she didn't care what he thought. Even though that was probably why she was okay with him seeing her in a bra, it was still quite difficult for Boone to draw his eyes away from her bare stomach and cleavage. It wasn't any different than seeing her in a swimsuit, which he had many times, but there was something a little more personal about this for some reason.

"Yeah?" He answered, looking out the window determinately, where they had a view of an expansive beach. He could hear the tropical blue waters crashing against the surf, which was soothing and had lulled him to sleep the past three nights.

"You know that club we passed after dinner tonight?" That day, they had gone on a snorkeling excursion in the Great Barrier Reef, which had left them exhausted, sated, and salty, and Adam had gone back to the hotel, much more lax about parental supervision than Sabrina. Shannon located a large t-shirt to wear over her underwear and put it on, climbing under the covers.

"Yeah." Boone followed suit, climbing under the covers of his bed, and clicked off the lights.

"Well, I was thinking that tomorrow night we could go."

"Adam would never let us," Boone thought aloud, though the idea of him and Shannon in a club alone together, possibly drunk, sounded quite appealing.

"He doesn't need to know…" Shannon said, her voice carrying a slightly suggestive waver.

"I guess not," he answered.

"Good." Shannon said, and turned over. Within minutes, he could hear her breath equalize, clearly asleep.

_Holy fucking shit_, Boone thought when Shannon came out of the bathroom the next night at about ten PM. "Holy fucking shit," he accidentally said aloud.

Shannon smirked, but Boone didn't care. Damn, he had never seen her look so hot in his entire life. Her "shirt" was less of a shirt and more of a piece of fabric draping over necessary areas, and was turquoise, his favorite color on her. It was backless, and had a neckline that plunged almost to her belly button, and it gathered at the base of her stomach, displaying midriff as well. The amount of cleavage she exposed qualified somewhere between audacious and naked. Her skirt was black leather that was about three inches long, and it barely even covered her ass. "You like?" She asked.

"Uh…" Boone could barely string together an intelligible sentence. "Uh… fuck… you look… yeah…"

"You look nice, too," she said. "I like your jeans."

"Thanks," he said, having recovered slightly. "So, how are we going to get into this club?" Shannon held up two cards. "Tonight, we are Marisa Farley and Matt Geller – aged 21 and 23."

"Oh my god," he said in disbelief. Shannon put one of the cards into Boone's hand.

"You ready to get crunk?" She exclaimed. Boone wasn't sure what this meant, but he played cool, and pretended he did.

"Should I be afraid?" He asked, opening the hotel door, and letting her go through first.

"Be afraid, be _very_ afraid," she winked.

When they got to the club, the party was already in full swing. Shannon immediately sat at the bar, and Boone followed suit. They ordered drinks for themselves, and Boone was already feeling the side effects after his first shot… more so after his second, third, and fourth. When an older, leering man approached Shannon and started hitting on her, Boone was able to say with a straight face, "Stay away from my girl, man." And Shannon didn't argue.

"Wanna dance?" She shouted over the din of the loud rap music behind them. Boone's head spun, and it wasn't just the alcohol – did Shannon have feelings for him, too? _What the hell_, he thought, feeling reckless, and finished another shot.

"Sure," he agreed. They walked towards the dance floor, and Shannon immediately faced her back towards him, and started grinding against him. He could feel her hips moving slightly against his, and, in his drunkenness, he didn't hesitate before placing his hands on her thighs, feeling the fabric of her skirt between her fingers. She grinded against him with more vehemence, leaning back into his shoulder, and before he knew it, he had dispelled all thoughts of _you can't freak with her sister_ out of his head, and started nuzzling into her neck, as she rolled her hips against him. He moved his hands up, letting his hands graze over her ass.

"Boone," she slurred a little, and turned around so that she was facing him. She put her arms over his shoulders, and he did the same, pressing their bodies up against each other so that he could feel the soft curve of her breasts through her thin shirt against his chest. Their hips matched up, and they moved to the rhythm of whatever crappy has-been hit played over the speakers, daring to burst the eardrums of everyone in the club. They continued this for two more intoxicating songs, until they were each swept away by other people, and Boone blinked, suddenly finding himself freaking with a woman who was at least twenty-five. Boone pulled away in fright, wondered where Shannon was, but ended up weaving towards a random booth, sitting down, and ordering, against his better judgment, another hard drink. He drank it alone, incredibly worried about his sister, but was too wasted to do anything about it. Suddenly she appeared in front of him, and finished off the rest of his drink. She crawled into his lap, sweaty and panting from dancing. Boone could not think.

She was facing him now, her legs spread out to either side of him. Their faces practically matched, and although her words, _we're never making out again_, that she had told him the morning after she told him about her mother, spun through his head, other more hormonal thoughts overpowered this. That's why he wasn't very surprised when he found that they were kissing ferociously, and that her tongue was snaking inside of his mouth again, except this time she wasn't crying, and she buried her hands deep into his hair. She sighed, and he let himself become lost in the moment as well, kissing back just as passionately as she was kissing him. _This was Shannon_, he thought, a thought both dangerous and thrilling. He circled his arms tightly around her waist, rubbing up and down her back as her hands strayed underneath his shirt.

"Get a room, kids," a cynical looking woman, also American, said callously. Boone wondered what she was doing in a club like this.

Boone pulled away from Shannon, who ignored the lady, still attacking his neck with kisses… like she was in love with him or something. Either that or just really drunk. But he silently begged for the first option. "Sorry," he told the lady, "Let me just…" Shannon stood him up, leading him back to the dance floor. They danced some more, well, it was actually more like making out with occasional hip movements that made what they were doing qualify as dancing, and Boone was completely delirious to finally have, if just for one evening, the girl who we was in love with. These kinds of kisses they were sharing weren't meaningless kisses. These kisses were so strong and hard and searching that he could imagine that they were on their honeymoon, or that this was the passionate reunion of two long-lost lovers – they weren't just stepsiblings looking for a quick and easy way to get rid of teenage hormones. He knew he was in love with his sister, and he knew that he wasn't just fabricating it in his own mind when he felt a spark, a magnetism that he was positive Shannon felt too, between them.

This spark was probably what caused them to be standing by the street, desperately hanging onto each other for support, hailing a cab five minutes later. They piled into the taxi, giggling and moaning as they continued to kiss, breaking the kiss to quickly slur the name of their hotel to the driver. They returned to making out, and he let his hands brush over her stomach, press into her hips, and stray even further to her breasts, caressing them through what little clothing lay there. Boone had waited practically his whole life to do this, but the moans of satisfaction she made when he did this made it well worth the wait. Even though feeling her up in the back of a cab wasn't especially glamorous.

"You kids American?" Asked the taxi driver, and Shannon pulled away from him for as short a time as possible.

"Yeah," she answered breathlessly, and went back to kissing Boone, brushing her hands over the fly of his jeans. Boone shuddered, but Shannon just giggled in response to his anguish. Typical Shannon. Suddenly, Boone was petrified. This was _Shannon_, the girl of his fucking dreams, here! What if he was doing something wrong? He wasn't moving at all, and she was clearly becoming impatient. _Think of Anna_, he thought, _what would you do if this were Anna?_ He kissed her again, leaning over her so he could reach under her shirt more easily. When he felt her up again, she moaned, and Boone felt a rush of victory – so far, he was winning their silent competition. But Shannon wasn't taking defeat so well, and was pushing third base on him – in a taxi cab, Boone thought, quickly eyeing the taxi driver, who had a bored expression on his face. But Boone was still too afraid to touch any more of her then he already had, what if she reacted badly? Then she would think he was a dirty pervert for the rest of their lives.

The driver coughed. "That'll be $10," he hinted. Shannon reached into his pocket for a $10 bill, and she shoved it in the driver's face.

Five minutes later, they were all over each other in the elevator, Boone still on cloud nine as he slipped his hand underneath the neckline of her shirt. He couldn't get over how perfect her skin was, and how quickly she reacted to the placement of his hand. Shannon jumped into his arms, wrapping her legs around his waist, and kissed him more, their tongues now becoming familiar with each other. "Oh my god," she giggled. The elevator made a small ding, reminding them that reality did, in fact, exist, and they broke away, walking down the hall to their room. Boone located the card key in his pocket, but Shannon grabbed it from his hands. Ever since she was a kid, she had had an odd fascination with card keys. When the key was accepted, she opened the door, and pushed him against the wall before he knew what she was doing. They fell deeper into another kiss, his tongue pressing into Shannon's, and his hands roaming all over her body. She seemed to have her hands quite centered around his crotch, as she expertly unbuttoned the top button on his jeans. He exhaled slowly, returning to the kiss only for a brief moment to untie the back of her shirt. It quickly fell to the ground, and then her top half was completely naked. He didn't want to leer, though, so he somehow managed to keep his eyes on her face… mostly. She started to unbutton his shirt, and with the first button, Boone was elated, but after the second and the third, the reality of what they were about to do started to sink in, and the great passion they had felt minutes ago began to morph into a gnawing feeling of guilt and impending regret.

"Boone?" Shannon said, like she was making sure it was him.

"Shannon," he said, making sure of the same thing. He looked at her – she was half-naked, sweating, and looked troubled. His desire to rip off her skirt and fuck her right then was great, but… he couldn't. This was the _actual_ Shannon, this wasn't Anna, who wanted to do much more with him than he did with her. This was the love of his life, and he wasn't about to do anything she didn't want him to do. Her expression slowly became more and more concerned… scared, even. Boone picked her shirt off the ground, and thrust it into her hands. "I'm sorry," he told her, and climbed into his bed, shutting off the lights, without even changing into his pajamas.

The next morning, Boone was woken up by Shannon at about ten thirty. "'Morning!" She exclaimed, looking hot and tired, wearing work-out clothes.

"Uh…" He looked around, squinting. Ow.

"So, I went to the gym upstairs this morning, and then I just got back, and I realized that you weren't awake, so I thought I'd wake you up. We have to leave for the airport in like an hour!" Shannon reached towards the bedside table, taking a huge gulp of coffee.

Boone looked at Shannon, searching for some sign of recognition on her face that last night had happened. There was a trace of _something_ in her eyes, but it was a very distant and subtle something. "Shan, about last night…" he started.

"Want some coffee?" She interrupted breezily.

"Uh… sure," he agreed.

"Too bad, get it yourself. I gotta go take a shower!" She practically hovered towards the bathroom. Now why the hell was she so _happy_? When Boone dragged himself out of bed and towards their in-room coffee maker, he got his answer. The coffee pot was completely empty. She had drunk an _entire pot of coffee_.

"Did you drink an entire pot of coffee?" He asked incredulously. She didn't answer. Boone shrugged, and started another pot. Maybe it was a good idea.

Shannon and Boone were proven wrong hours later, as they tapped their feet restlessly the entire plane-ride home. And when the caffeine wore off, the effects were twice as bad as a hangover. Adam looked on, confused.

_Wow, random ending. But whatever, I hope it was good, I hope you enjoyed them making out. Please review! Thanks! Also, I think this may be like the 3rd to last chapter. _


	18. Chapter 18

**_Tangled Youth _**

**Chapter 18 **

"You're late," was the first thing Shannon, Boone, and Adam heard when they arrived at gate 481. It was Sabrina, and her hair waspulled back impeccably despite having justbeen on a flight for fifteen hours.

"Satan has a way of randomly appearing places, doesn't she?" Shannon muttered to Boone, tripping over her bag in surprise.

"What are you doing here?" Boone asked. Shannon leaned across Boone to pick up her bag, and he could feel her chest brush over his arm. He had _touched _her there, he thought, somewhere between proud and ashamed.

"How about 'hello'?" Sabrina suggested.

"Sorry, mom," he looked down. "I was just wondering, because… I didn't know the flights would coincide perfectly."

"Talk in English, Boone," Shannon suggested.

"Let me _say_ what I was going to _say_," he told her, a little frustrated that she refused to acknowledge what had happened at the club the night before. "I just didn't know, mom."

"It's okay, honey," Sabrina smiled. "So, how was Queensland?"

_Awesome_, he thought, _I felt up my sister_! "It was good. We went snorkeling."

"All of you?"

"No, just me and Shan." As if on cue, Shannon's cell phone went off. Her ring was the tune of "Lady Marmalade" from Moulin Rouge.

"Hold on a sec," Shannon said, and walked towards a chair. "Hey!" She said to the person in the phone. "Sure, that sounds great! I missed you too, Gabe!" Boone's face fell. She had a boyfriend?

"What else did you do?" Sabrina asked.

_My sister gave me a hand job!_ "We went out to dinner, and we went to this place where we could feed kangaroos. It was really fun."

"Well, that's good," Sabrina said quickly. She looked contemptuously towards Shannon. "Tell your sister we're going to baggage claim." Boone looked at his mother. It was like Shannon was _so_ beneath her she had to get Boone to address her for her.

"Shan!" He called. "We're going to baggage claim!" Shannon giggled into the phone, looking at Boone and shooing him away. Boone smirked, noting that this Shannon was nothing like the Shannon who had made out with him in a taxi. But if she acted like that with him, how did she act with other boys? Boone shuddered, but followed his parents. Shannon tagged along, still blabbing into her cell phone.

"Gabe," she laughed. "You are _so_ funny, but I gotta go. My brother is giving me the stare of death."

"I am _not_!" He argued, although he probably was.

"Shut the hell up, Bonehead," she rolled her eyes. "So, Gabe, I'll talk to you tomorrow. I'll ask my dad about the party tomorrow… I can't wait to see you… bye!" Shannon hung up, and went ahead of Boone, her hips swinging as she walked. _Why the fuck do you have to be in love with your sister?_ He asked himself. It would be so much easier if he could just get his shit together and get _over_ her. "Dad!" She squealed. "Would it be okay if I…" Boone tuned out real life, immersed in his own thoughts. When he looked up next, he was surprised to see that his mom was right there.

"Don't slouch, Boone," She said. Boone smiled weakly. "So, when are you going to start up the internship again?"

"Whenever," he shrugged.

"If you want people to start treating you like an adult, stop slouching and giving me answers like _whenever_. Come on, Boone, you're so juvenile." Boone tried not to roll his eyes.

"Mother," he said, an edge to his voice. "I will start the internship again at the very moment when you ask me to."

"How about Monday?" She said.

"That's tomorrow."

Sabrina scoffed. "I _know_ this. I don't want you spending your entire summer falling into bad habits. I mean, if I find out you're _sleeping around again_," she lowered her voice, about to say something else, but Boone interrupted her, finally fed up.

"_Mother_," he cut in, "I am not a… I'm not some kind of _slut_ or something, okay? If you want to know what a slut is, why don't you look at _Shannon_?" He said loudly, causing Shannon to turn around, her phone permanently attached to her ear, and furrow her eyebrows. When he saw the hurt expression on her face, he instantly wanted to relinquish his comment, and draw her up in his arms and whisper apologies in her ear, but found himself looking at the diamond-patterned floor instead.

"_Sorry_," he attempted, catching up with her. "I don't know what I was thinking, I'm _really_ sorry, Shan, okay?" Shannon said some sort of send-off into her phone, hanging up. Sabrina and Adam began to walk ahead, and Shannon and Boone lagged behind. Shannon scowled at him.

"Don't you feel… kind of filthy?" She asked darkly. "About what we did?"

"I guess," he looked away. He didn't know _what_ he thought. I mean, it was gross, right? So why didn't he feel worse about it?

"You enjoyed it, didn't you?" She accused.

"Well, I mean… come on, you didn't?"

"We were _drunk_."

"You didn't answer my question, Shannon." He stopped in front of her, staring straight at her so that she wouldn't avoid him.

"Well," she shrugged. "I mean, you know… you're a good kisser… I don't know, you know.."

"Just say yes or no." He said firmly. He needed an answer, and he needed it now.

"Boone, come on," she bit her lip uncomfortably. Her perfect, raspberry-red lips that had kissed him with fervor the night before… "Yes. Fine, yes." Boone stepped back, and they walked forward, quickening their pace to begin to catch up with their parents. "But that doesn't mean it's happening again."

"Boone! Shannon! Pick up the pace!" Adam beckoned them forward.

"Yeah, really," Sabrina had a habit of ganging up on people. "What on earth is taking so long?"

"Nothing," he bit back frustration, and stepped onto the escalator that led down to the baggage claim.

Once they arrived at the baggage claim, Shannon and Boone stood impatiently on one side of it, Shannon's eagerness overshadowed Boone – she was practically bouncing, she was so antsy. She _hated_ waiting around. Boone smiled in spite of himself. _God_, why did everything she did have to be so adorable and sexy and damn irresistible? "Eager much?" He smirked.

"Well, _excuse_ me if I don't want to stand in this Craphole all day," she snipped, a smile tugging at the corner of her lips.

"All night," he corrected.

"What time is it anyway?"

"Time for you to get a wa –"

"How middle school are you, Boone? Just tell me what fucking time it is." She rolled her eyes.

"I'm not wearing a watch."

"Or course you are, you're a dork. Whatever happened to the one you won with your happy meal in fourth grade?"

"Um," he said, "It broke."

"I know, I remember, you spent _all_ weekend trying to fix it. And then you cried when you couldn't. It was just after I moved in. ___I_ thought you were insane. And I thought your name was stupid."

"Thanks," he retorted, "Well I think it's stupid when…" But he couldn't think of anything stupid that Shannon did. That _his_ Shannon did. Shannon made a sound somewhere between a cough and a laugh. "There's your bag," he said, noticing Shannon's suitcase. He grabbed it and pulled it off the conveyer belt, handing it to her.

"Thanks," she muttered, taking it from him. "There's yours." She made no effort to reach for it.

"Got it," he said once he had secured it on the floor. "No thanks to you…"

"Oh _whatever_." She responded. "Sorry, I'm in like a really bad mood. And I really wanna see my boyfriend."

"Maybe you should have remembered that when you were making out with me last night," he said, annoyed. "And now you're rubbing it in my face."

"I am not rubbing shit in your face, Boone. Just _shut up_ about it, alright? Like I said, we were drunk!" She grabbed her bag dramatically and walked towards her father, her rolling suitcase trailing decisively in her wake. Boone stood still for a moment, hoping desperately that Shannon wasn't _too_ upset with him, or worse, that she had discovered how he felt about her. But he was interrupted from his thoughts moments later.

"Boone," his mother's shrill voice commanded. "It's time to go." He followed her, Shannon, and Adam to the car. "We'll need to put the bags in the passenger's seat as well as the trunk. Boone, please help me load the bags, don't just _stand _there!" Boone rubbed his eyes, realizing suddenly how exhausted he was – both physically and emotionally. After helping his mother, he sat on one side of the back seat, Shannon on the other. Sabrina sat in the middle, a literal barrier symbolizing their rift. Boone leaned his head against the window as Adam pulled out of the parking lot, letting himself drift off.

But his sleep was short-lived, because when he woke up next, the car was screeching to a raging halt as the car in front of them stopped suddenly, and Sabrina put her arm across Boone's chest instinctively. Shannon lurched forward, but Sabrina didn't do anything to stop her. But it was too late for Adam to stop the car from traveling further forward, and with a satisfying crack, their car hit the bumper of the car in front of them. "Fuck," Adam swore. "I am _so_ sorry, you guys," he said to his family. "Oh my god." He pulled over to the side of the road. "I need to go and talk to them. _Shit_!" He swore again. It had begun to rain, a tribute to the occasion, and Shannon was staring straight forward, breathing heavily.

"Excuse me," Sabrina said to Boone. "I need to get out of the car." Boone stood up, and went around the other side of the car, opening Shannon's side. Sabrina and Adam were both too distracted to notice Shannon's anguish.

"Shannon?" He said quietly, all thoughts of the car crash erased from his mind when he looked at her. She wheezed, coughing. "Shannon," he looked at the ceiling, thinking quickly. "Where is your inhaler?" Tears trickled down her face, and she shook her head, her face paling. "Shan, you have to tell me." She pointed at him, and Boone suddenly realized it was in his pocket. He pulled it out. "Shannon… he sat down next to her, holding the inhaler to her lips. "Just breathe, okay?" He whispered in her ear. She breathed into the inhaler. "Good, now just keep doing that." Shannon held onto the inhaler too, their hands making contact. Her knuckles were white, she was holding onto it so hard. Her breathing slowed to a regular beat, and finally, she pulled back from the inhaler, leaning back against the seat, her eyes closed, inhaling and exhaling normally.

"I know we just bumper hit them," she finally said, "But it really shook me up, okay?"

"Yeah," he nodded. "I totally understand."

"I'm thirsty," she said, her voice hoarse.

"There's a 7-11 across the street," he looked out of the car, where Adam and the driver of the other car, who was balding and middle-aged, stood exchanging contact information. Neither of them was hurt, so Boone assumed it was safe to get out of the car and tell his mother where he and Shan were going. "C'mon," he patted her shoulder comfortingly, hoping the innocent hand on her arm didn't become something more. Shannon stood up and got out of the car, shivering in the unusually cold night, as droplets of rain landed in her hair. "Mom," he said publicly.

"Yes, Boone?" She asked, an edge to her voice. Adam looked over for a moment, but then fell back into conversation with the other man.

"Shan just had an asthma attack," he said, making sure that Sabrina felt guilty about it. "So we're going to the 7-11 to get her something to drink."

"Okay," Sabrina nodded, barely even acknowledging that moments ago, Shannon had been unable to breathe.

"Here, let's go," he put his arm around Shannon, who held on to him as well, and they crossed the street carefully, their heads facing the ground to avoid getting their faces wet. They quickened their pace in order to get inside as soon as possible. Neither of them was especially eager about getting wet right now. "So, what do you wanna get?" He asked her when they arrived inside of the fluorescent-lit store, whose contents ranged from beef jerky to cigarettes to Fig Newtons. The cashier, a Hispanic man who looked bored and distracted, barely noticed their appearance.

"Um," she said quietly, "I guess… some water and crackers?"

"That's what they feed people when they're in prison." He attempted a joke.

"Well, it's what I want." She responded stubbornly, not amused.

"Alright," She followed him into the aisle where crackers were sold, and picked out a small box of Wheat thins. He got a water from the industrial refrigerator, and they went to buy the items. Boone looped his arm over her shoulders again as they left the store, but Shannon pulled away.

"No," she said.

"What?" He asked, turning her face towards him with his thumb.

"Stop," she begged, her eyes filling with tears. Boone pulled back, confused and deathly afraid he had done something wrong. "I don't want it to happen again!"

"Don't want what to –" But he stopped mid-sentence in realization, and they walked to the car in an awkward, loomingsilence. But five minutes later, she was curled up against him, sound asleep. He couldn't help himself from touching her face lightly, and tucking a piece of hair behind her ear. _I don't want it to happen again_, he voice echoed in his head. It was too late. It was already happening.

_I finally updated, lol. Oh my god, lost-forum and lost-media got hacked! It sucks! Anyway, I've decided to extend the story to when the Abandoned flashbacks start… but just so you know it means you will have to deal with Boone being with other girls. Sorry. See the review button? It's calling you. ;) _


	19. Chapter 19

**_Tangled Youth_**

**Chapter 19**

"Boone, it's time to get up!" The shrill voice of his mother commanded, opening the shades on his windows, causing light to flood into his eyes.

"_What_?" He groaned.

"It's time to get up! Summer school starts today, and you wanted to get that required religion class over with, remember?"

"I remember _you_ telling me that." He said flatly.

"Why are you always so negative? Quit being so negative! And besides, it'll look good on your college applications if they see you've been taking initiative…"

"Yes, mother." He said into his pillow. "I'll need you to leave if I'm going to get dressed."

"Fine," she responded. "But you'd better get an A in that class, all I've got to say."

Boone rolled over to look at the clock on his bed. It was _way_ too early – 6:45 AM on a Monday morning… in July, no less. But he rolled out of bed, clad only in boxers, because it had been a warm night. He took some clothes out of his closet, and walked towards the shower. He paused briefly by Shannon's room, peering inside to see her peacefully sleeping. He wondered what she was dreaming about, looking so innocent and young, sound asleep without makeup.

When he arrived at school, he was anything but happy. Summer school was supposed to be a _punishment_ for the bad kids, not something that the "motivated" kids did so it looked good on their college applications that his mother had been nagging him about since he was a freshman. He walked towards room 201, where the required religion class was being taught. If he didn't go to Catholic school, he thought, he wouldn't even have to take this class. He sat somewhere in the middle of the room, and took out a binder and a pencil. He could see the back of a girl with blonde hair in front of him, and Jerry, who was in his PE class and no doubt had failed this one, sat down next to him.

"Hey, dude," he said, as if they were best friends.

"Hey," he said back ineffectually.

"Guess who I hooked up with last week?"

"No," he responded.

"What?" He looked confused. "You know that hot girl Kristy?"

"Yes," he said.

"Well, you know… she…" he motioned towards his crotch.

"Why are you telling me this?" He wondered aloud.

"Don't be a dickhead," said Jerry. "You're just jealous."

"Sure," he said, too tired to say anything else. He wasn't jealous. He had definitely had the opportunity, that was for damn sure.

"Welcome to comparative religion," a nun said to the class. No one said anything back. She continued to talk, concluding her speech by handing out a worksheet and telling them to find the answers in the textbooks in front of them.

The girl in front of him turned around. "Hey, can I borrow a pen?" She asked, smiling at him. Boone stared. Her blonde hair framed her face, hitting below her shoulders. She had bright hazel eyes, and perfect pink lips… if her skirt was shorter and her shirt was tighter, she could have passed for Shannon.

"Yeah," he smiled back, and handed her a pen. "Are you new?"

"Yeah, I just moved here from San Diego. I'm Erin."

"I'm Boone. I just wanted to get this class over with," he said quietly, so that the teacher wouldn't hear. He suddenly really, really wanted this girl. Bad. Her hair was the exact shade as Shannon's, and her smile was similar was identical. Would her tongue feel the same way as well?

"At my old school, we didn't have to take a religion class, so I guess I'm just here to get it over with as well."

"Where do you live?" He whispered when the nun gave them a fierce look.

"Malibu. On the beach."

"Really? Me too!" He smiled. "What street?"

"Rochester."

"Are you serious? We live on the same street!"

"That's crazy," she said. "What a coincidence! So are you a senior, too?"

"Yeah," he answered, still staring at her.

"Well," she nodded uncomfortably. "I should probably get started on this worksheet…" Boone looked away, blushing.

"Yeah, sorry," he looked at his paper, but he was finding it difficult to concentrate. It was a good thing him and Shannon hadn't ever been in the same class, because he would probably be failing school if they had been. _Question 1. State at least five distinct factors that define Catholicism. _He flipped his book to the table of contents, and found the answer. Erin shifted positions in the seat ahead of him. He blinked, and suddenly forgot what he was looking for. "What did you get for number one?" He asked Jerry.

"Oh, go design a wedding dress or something," Jerry said. Ah, the joys of having a famous mother. "Dude, fuck off. I'm not telling you the answer."

"Okay," he said, taken aback.

"Boys? Is there a problem?" The nun asked.

"No," Boone smiled charismatically. The nun turned back to what she had been doing.

"I was just kidding, dude," said Jerry. "No need to take it all personally." He looked across the room towards a heavy-set, red-faced boy, who grinned back at Jerry. They were probably in on some _hilarious_ joke or something. Boone rolled his eyes and started writing down the answer to number one. He was on question five when Jerry nudged him.

"What?" He said.

"You know your sister?"

Boone tensed. "Um, yes."

"She's hella fine. And she's like, a cocktease."

"Excuse me?" He challenged. _No one_ was going to get away with talking about Shannon like that. Even if he knew from personal experience that it was true.

"Sorry, dude," he guffawed, "I probably shouldn't have said that. Across the room, the fat kid's jowls shook as he laughed.

"Don't say those kinds of things about my sister, okay?" He said seriously. "You don't know her."

"What if I said I did know her a little better than you thought?" He retorted.

Boone didn't want to think about that. So he shut it out of his mind and answered testily, "Just shut the hell up about my sister."

"Fine," he said nonchalantly. Boone, still fuming, answered questions six, seven, and eight. "You know your ex-girlfriend? Anna van Camp?"

"Yes," he replied, the upcoming question about Hinduism suddenly looking very appealing.

"She's like, a blow queen." He said. Boone ignored him. "You see my friend Fred over there?" _It's kind of hard not to_, Boone thought, looking at the boy whose layers of blubber were spread out over the sides of his chair. "Well, Kristy told him that…" Boone answered the question about Hinduism.

"Just be quiet, Jerry, I'm trying to work."

"Yeah, seriously," Erin looked back at Jerry, narrowing her eyes in a particularly Shannon-like gesture.

"Feisty," Jerry said under his breath. Boone clenched his hands into fists, and was beyond elated when the class ended.

* * *

"Erin?" Boone said after class had been dismissed and the nun had assigned copious amounts of homework.

"Yeah?" She smiled, putting her binder into a tote bag.

"Um," he stuttered. "Well, I was just wondering if you needed a ride home."

"No thanks, I'm good, but…" Erin put her tote bag on her shoulder. "I think we're going the same direction."

Boone followed her to the parking lot, trying to make small talk. "So, why'd you move here?"

"My dad's job. He wanted to be closer to LA so that it wasn't such a commute." She said amiably. "Hey, your last name is Carlyle, right?"

"Yes." He waited for the inevitable _hey, are you Sabrina Carlyle's son?_

"Are you Sabrina Carlyle's son?" She squinted into the sunlight.

"Yeah," he looked down.

"My mom's wedding dress is by her."

"Oh." Erin continued walking, and Boone noticed that her legs were long and smooth, just like Shannon's. Her hips bounced as she walked, subtly, which was exactly what Shannon would do. The only difference was that he could get this girl. She stopped by a small white coupe, and leaned against the car.

"This is my stop," she said. "I guess I'll see you tomorrow, bright and early."

"Yeah," he said. Now it was time to get up his nerve. "Hey, I don't usually do this, but… do you wanna go out on Friday?"

She laughed. "Um," she smiled apologetically. "I don't really know you."

"Oh come on, it'll be fun. The worst thing that'll happen is that we'll hate each other and every moment we have to see each other afterwards will be incredibly awkward." He shrugged. She giggled. "Or, we could go out, have a great time, and summer school will be that much more bearable." She rolled her eyes, but she was still smiling.

"Okay," she finally said. "Yeah, I'll go."

"We could have dinner at this diner by the pier," he suggested. "I could pick you up around seven?"

"Sure," she said. "You realize we've barely exchanged ten words?"

"I know," he half-smiled in the way that Shannon had once told him was sexy. "I swear I don't normally do this."

"Uh huh," she replied disbelievingly, pushing herself of the side of the car. She took her keys out of her tote bag. "I gotta go. I have a tennis lesson."

"See you," he said.

"Um, that kind of involves getting off of my car, Boone." She reminded him.

"Oh!" He jumped away. "Sorry."

"Bye," she said again.

"Bye," he walked towards his car, feeling jovial. She wasn't Shannon, but she was close.

* * *

"Boone!" Shannon greeted him warmly when he walked in the door, which was definitely on the surprising side. "I went shopping, can I show you what I bought?"

"Sure," Boone replied. This had been typical of Shannon's shopping excursions since she was ten. But as she grew older, it also became more and more painful. More skin, more outfits, more unadulterated desire on Boone's part.

"Come on to my room, I'll show you!" She exclaimed, chipper. Boone followed her upstairs, where three large bags sat on the ground. One was white and screamed _Fred Segal_, another displayed a shirtless man and said _Abercrombie_, and the last one was brown and said _Large Brown Bag_. Bloomingdale's, Boone knew, as both Shannon and Sabrina were shopaholics. "So, first, I've got this adorable red bikini from Bloomies," she smiled, and went in the closet to change into it. He shut his eyes decisively, even though she was behind a door, to control himself. Seconds later, Shannon emerged in a swimsuit that consisted of three tiny pieces of fabric, two of them attached, covering areas that allowed the swimsuit to still be relatively legal. She turned around, and Boone didn't see a swimsuit. He saw boobs, ass, long expanses of leg… _sex_, he thought. _Sex, sex, sex_. That was all he saw. "Do you like it?" Her voice said.

"Yes," he squeaked. "Yes."

"Good, I've got three more." She smiled. Boone practically choked on his tongue. How on earth was he going to control himself for three more swimsuits? Shannon walked back into her closet.

_Lololol, I had no idea how to finish it, and then my brain was like, 'An hour later, Shannon walked in on Boone jerking off in the bathroom." But then I burst into a hysterical fit of giggles, like, how did I just think of that? Way too Deruvius for me. Anyway, please review. : )_


	20. Chapter 20

_Chapter reEdited on 2/25/06._

**_Tangled Youth _**

**Chapter 20 **

Erin's house was a creamy yellow, and didn't sprawl halfway across the block. The front yard was covered in grass, but it wasn't the kind of grass that looked like it had been manicured to perfection for hours. In the yard, there was a little plastic tricycle on its side, so Boone supposed Erin had a little sister. He stepped over the tricycle and to the front porch, ringing the doorbell. He was surprised that he was so nervous, but he _really_ wanted her to like him.

A middle-aged woman with sandy-blonde hair opened the door. "Hi, you must be Boone!" she said. "I'm Erin's mom, you can call me Susan. Erin will be here in a second." Just then, Erin came out of her bedroom.

"Hey," she smiled at Boone. She was wearing a light blue shirt, a denim skirt, and sandals.

"Hey," he said back.

"So, I see you've met my mom."

"Yeah. Hi," he said to Boone's mom.

"So," Erin started. "You wanna get going?"

"Sure. What kind of food are you in the mood for?"

"Whatever you want," she said agreeably, leading Boone to the door. "Bye, Mom!" She called as she closed the door.

"Have fun!" Her mom called after.

"Sorry about my mom," Erin blushed after they had reached the driveway. "She can be a little –"

"She seems _really_ nice," Boone said earnestly. He wished that his mom contained even an ounce of Erin's mom effortless affability.

"Oh, okay," Erin looked surprised. "Cool. So, where are we going?"

"I thought we'd go to this diner by the pier. They have chicken and hamburgers and salads and stuff like that."

"Sounds good!" She chirped. Boone held the car door open for her as she stepped inside the car. "Thank you!"

"You're welcome," he answered, sitting on his side of the car, putting on his seat belt, and turning on the ignition. "So, one week of summer school down."

"Yeah, I know. It wouldn't be that bad if those guys _Jerry_ and _Fred_ weren't in it, though."

"Guess not. Most people at our school aren't that bad. It's just that it's summer school."

"That's what I suspected. So, what else are you doing this summer?"

"Um," Boone stopped at a stoplight. "I'm doing this internship at my mom's company. And I just got back from Australia."

"Oh, wow!" she exclaimed. "That sounds really fun, where did you go?"

"We all went to Sydney, and then me and Shannon and my step-dad went to the Great Barrier Reef."

"Shannon?" Erin wrinkled her nose in confusion.

"Oh, that's my sister." He corrected himself. Somehow, he had just assumed that Erin knew who she was.

"So your parents are divorced? You have a stepfather"

"Yeah," he answered.

She seemed to sense that he didn't really want to talk about it. "Are we listening to Bright Eyes?" She referred to what was currently wafting from the car stereo.

"Yeah, the _Fevers and Mirrors_ album," he smiled. "You know them?"

"Yeah, I love them, but I'm surprised you've heard of them. Not many people have, especially in LA. I grew up in Oregon. We move around a lot."

"Oh. So, do you have a little sister? I saw a tricycle in your yard."

"Yeah, my baby sister Marie." She grinned. "She's three. She's so cute."

"I used to wish I had a baby brother or sister."

"You have a little sister," she pointed out. _Yeah, but it's not exactly the same when you want to have sex with said sister,_ he thought.

"Yeah, but she's only a year and a half younger than me."

"Do you guys get along?" She asked as Boone pulled into the parking area of their destination.

"Usually. We're pretty close, I guess. But we also fight about everything."

"I see," replied Erin, getting out of the car and smoothing out her skirt. "So she goes to St. Gabriel's as well?"

"Yeah," Boone said, leading Erin towards the restaurant. After they had been seated and looked at the menus, they ordered.

"Okay," said the waitress, who looked like she had received numerous amounts of Botox and dyed her hair bleach blonde just a few too many times, finishing writing down their orders. "Here, I'll take that, honey," she said to Boone, whisking away his menu. Boone wasn't quite sure, but he could have sworn he saw the waitress wink at him before leaving.

Erin laughed. "So is it just me, or was she flirting with you?" She whispered.

"I hope not," he answered, petrified. "She was like fifty!"

Erin giggled. "Well, I think she has good taste."

"Thanks," Boone smiled, and let himself look at Erin, with her perfect blonde hair and brown eyes, just like Shannon's. Erin tucked her hair behind her ear and looked away for a second, alerting Boone of her discomfort. "Sorry." He muttered.

"It's okay!" She exclaimed. "So, you live on my street, right?"

"Yeah," he nodded. "Like ten houses from your house."

"What color is it?"

"White with a dark gray roof. Green shutters."

"Oh! I know which one you're talking about! That house is gigantic!"

"Yeah, I guess it is."

"Isn't there like a built-in tennis court?"

"No," Boone shook his head good-naturedly. "But we have a pool."

"Awesome. We don't have a pool, but we did in San Diego."

"Well, you can come over and swim in our pool whenever you want. We don't use it as much as we should. My sister usually just lies next to it on the lawn chair tanning. Sometimes we swim, though." He imagined Shannon in her new swimsuit she had shown him the other day. She had swam in it the day before, and he had watched her from his bedroom when she emerged from the pool, soaking wet and freezing cold as the fabric stuck to her body. He desperately tried to get the image out of his head.

"I might just have to take you up on that offer," she said. "I love swimming."

"What?" Boone said, distracted. "Oh, here's our food." Erin tried to maintain a straight face when the waitress smiled secretively at Boone while serving him his hamburger. Boone blushed noticeably, staring at the plate as if it were the most fascinating thing on earth. When she left, Erin burst into giggles. Boone watched her futilely attempt to contain herself, trying to disguise her laughter for a hysterical fit of coughing into her napkin.

"So," she said after she had stopped laughing. "Do middle-aged women often hit on you?"

"Yeah," he said sarcastically. "It's a huge problem."

She laughed. "You know, when I first saw you I thought you'd be a dumb jock. But I like you better now that I know you a little."

"Well, if I was _able_ to play sports, I probably would be a jock."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, I sort of lack… er, essential sporting qualities. Like the ability to shoot a basket."

She raised her eyebrows. "Can you serve a tennis ball?"

"Yeah, somewhat." His mother had made him spend time as a child in the country club she belonged to, and had convinced Boone that it was a skill crucial to survival in the corporate world.

"Well, we should play tennis sometime, then," she smiled.

"Yeah, we should. How's the salad?" He gestured to her chicken Caesar salad.

"It's good, thanks. You wanna try some?"

"Sure," He tentatively took his fork and took a bite of her salad. "It's pretty good. Want some of my hamburger?"

"That's okay," she was still smiling.

"What?" He said playfully.

"Nothing," she looked away, the smile still stuck to her face.

"You're so cute," he accidentally said out loud. "I mean – "

"Thanks," she said cheerfully, stealing a French fry from Boone's plate. "So, tell me more about yourself. What are your hobbies?"

That was good question. There were many things that he somewhat enjoyed doing, but nothing that he was truly passionate about. "Sometimes I run… I like to swim."

"Do you read?"

"Yeah, I like to read."

"What kinds of books?"

"I like a lot of the old science fiction books. And just the popular books. Like the bestsellers. And of course, classic stuff like _1984_ and _Watership Down_ and stuff."

"That's the one about the bunnies, right?"

"Yeah."

"It sort of reminded me of _Animal Farm_."

"I liked it better than _Animal Farm_, though."

"Me too." Boone looked at Erin's empty plate.

"Are you done?"

"Yeah, just about. You?"

"Yeah. You wanna get dessert? There's this ice cream place about a block from here that we could walk to."

"That sounds good," she replied. After they had gotten the bill (Boone paid, following the unwritten laws of dating) and left the building, they started to walk to the ice cream place.

From the outside of the store, Boone saw two familiar faces inside. "Weird…" he started.

"What?"

"My sister and her friend are in there." He prayed that Anna wouldn't say anything overtly embarrassing, and that Erin wouldn't notice that she looked exactly like Shannon.

"Oh, okay," she shrugged. "C'mon." Boone followed her into the store.

"Boone!" Anna waved them towards their table. "Shan, look, it's Boone! What are you doing here?" Boone hesitated, but Erin obviously did not understand why this was so awkward. Shannon half-smiled at them. "Hi!" Anna exclaimed to Erin. "Who are you?"

"Uh," Boone's manners came back. "This is Erin, we're on a date, and this is my sister, Shannon," he waved in their general area. "And this is her friend, Anna." Anna gave Boone a stare of death, so he felt it was necessary to add, "She's also my ex girlfriend."

"Oh, okay. Hi, Shannon." She held out her hand to shake Anna's. _Oh god_, thought Boone.

Anna looked amused. "Oh god," she voiced what Boone was thinking. "Ew."

"What?" Erin looked as if she had soiled someone's family honor.

"Oh," Boone said. "It's just that Anna's the friend, not the sister."

"_I'm_ the sister," Shannon finally said something. "Hi, Erin." She held out her hand. This was moment where Shannon would decide whether or not she liked Erin, and Boone squinted, trying to read his sister's expression. "Cute shoes!" She said. Boone breathed a sigh of relief. "We were heading to a party and decided to get something to eat first."

"Sorry, I'm still getting these really disturbing thoughts about us being siblings. Seriously! Ew, much?" Anna continued. "Fuck, that would be gross. I mean, remember when –"

"Anna!" Boone reprimanded, right as Shannon kicked her under the table.

"I mean, remember when you're having fun on your date?" She tried to rephrase what she had said before unsuccessfully. "I mean, have fun!"

"Thanks!" Erin chirped, and turned towards the board that listed the ice cream flavors. "What kind of ice cream are you getting, Boone?"

"Rocky road," he heard Shannon say under her breath.

"Rocky road," Boone told Erin. He wanted to get out of that ice cream place _fast_, before something even more humiliating happened.

Eventually, they did make it out of the store alive, and they walked leisurely back to the car down the street, comfortably eating their ice cream. When they reached the car, it was getting cold, and Erin, who wasn't wearing a sweater, started to shiver. "Here," he took off his jacket and gave it to Erin.

"Thank you," she replied, putting it on. "Ooooh, it smells like April Fresh laundry soap." She commented.

Erin sat in the car, and Boone closed her door, walking around to the other side of the car and sitting down himself. He backed out of the parking lot. "You can look through my CDs if you want and pick something to listen to."

"Thanks," she picked up his CD case and flipped through it. A few minutes later, Boone heard the familiar opening lines of his favorite Bright Eyes song waft through the car. When they reached her house, Boone opened her door for her again (girls seemed to really appreciate that, he noticed, and walked her to the door.

"So," he said as she fumbled with her keys. "That was fun."

"Yeah, it was." She stepped closer to him. He moved even closer, until their lips were almost touching.

"So I think we're supposed to kiss now," he murmured.

"Yeah, I think so, too." Her voice was just above a whisper. Boone kissed her on the lips, and she kissed back, pulling away tastefully after a few seconds. She smiled.

"I'll call you," he said. "Bye."

"Bye, Boone. Have a good weekend."

"See you in hell on Monday!" He started walking back towards his car.

"I look forward to it!" She laughed, and walked inside of her house. Boone sat back in the car, and started the ten second drive home. _If I had a real father_, he thought, _I'd tell him about the date_. But he didn't have a real father, so he went back to an empty house and fell asleep while reading in bed.

* * *

The next morning, Boone was sitting at the kitchen table, eating cereal. Shannon shuffled in, wearing her boy short underwear and a big t-shirt. He could tell that she was getting something to eat as well, because he heard the sounds of cereal clinking against the sleek white porcelain of the bowl. She headed to the refrigerator, and put milk in her cereal. She reached the table, looked around for a moment, and then plopped down in Boone's lap.

"Uh, Shannon?" He said. "What are you doing?"

"Someone did something with the other chair," She replied, gesturing towards the lack of chairs at the table. She slurped some milk off of her spoon gracefully. "So, how was your date last night? Hannah was pretty."

"It's Erin."

"Oh, right, well, Erin was pretty."

"Yeah. It went well. Surprisingly well."

"Well that's good." Shannon said, settling herself into Boone's lap. "The party was crap. I had to save Anna's ass from the lands of alcohol-induced coma."

"That's nice," Boone said sarcastically. "All in a day's work, huh?"

"Yeah. What kind of cereal are you eating?" She looked at Boone's bowl. "Raisin bran," she shook her head. "It's all about the Fruit Loops, Boone." She shoved a spoonful of it towards Boone's mouth.

"I don't want your damn cereal," his voice was strained. This was _so _uncomfortable. He either wanted to take her cereal and throw it on the floor and then push her against the wall and make out with her and touch her all over until she could barely breathe, or he wanted to eat his cereal in peace. There was nothing in between that sounded at all appealing.

"Fine, health freak." Just then, Sabrina walked in.

"What's going on?" Sabrina squinted her eyes.

"Don't have a cow, Sabrina, there wasn't another chair here, so I just sat here." Shannon explained nonchalantly.

"Shannon, can I talk to you?" She replied dangerously.

"Oh, come on, it's not a big deal!" Sabrina looked livid. "Oh, _fine_." After they left the room, Boone strained to hear what they were saying in vain.

"What happened?" He asked when she came back, looking at the floor.

"Nothing," she sat flatly, dragging a chair from the other room to the table. "She said to stop… I don't know. She just said not to… what was the word? Uh, tease you, or something." She shrugged, but her eyes looked like her feelings had been hurt.

"You okay?" He asked.

"I'm fine," she smiled wanly, and took another bite of her soggy Fruit Loops. Was Sabrina catching on? Boone had a feeling that she might be, from the jealous, biting looks she gave them when they were happy, when they were joking around… but maybe he was just being paranoid. And Boone was pretty sure that Sabrina would like Erin. Maybe then she'd realize that Boone wasn't interested in Shannon in _that way_. He smiled uncertainly, not even believing his own thoughts.

_Please review, and tell me what you especially liked or didn't like! Thanks! _


	21. Chapter 21

**Chapter 21**

Shannon was lying on her stomach on the lounge chair by the pool, her sunglasses dramatically large against her delicate features. She flipped the pages of her Elle magazine with attitude, as if the contents of the pages weren't worthy of her attention. Her legs were crossed behind her, and she swung them back and forth, drawing Boone's attention to her long, smooth legs and the rest of her practically naked body – each swimsuit she had worn throughout the summer further tested the limits of what was respectable. Since it was early September, this one was implausibly skimpy, especially now that she was tanning topless with only inches of towel covering her bare chest. He let his eyes trail over her bare back momentarily, not allowing them to drift to her bikini bottom, that sloped dangerously low on her hipbones.

"Boone!" Boone drifted from his reverie as Erin called his name.

"Yeah?" He turned towards his girlfriend, who was in the pool next to him, wearing a much more modest bikini.

She smiled girlishly. "It's getting a little cold, do you wanna go inside?"

Boone looked back at Shannon, who stretched languidly on the chair, momentarily exposing the side of her breast, just barely covered by her towel, and shivered. He wanted her so badly now he had to bite his lip from saying anything, dig his toes into the concrete bottom of the pool to keep from approaching her, clench his fists to keep from touching her. "Boone?" Erin said again.

"Yeah, sorry," he swam towards her, feeling guilty for ignoring her, and after they stepped out of the pool he wrapped a towel around her shoulders and hugged her to his chest to keep her warm, making sure Shannon took note. Erin, on the other hand, looked a little uncomfortable with displays of affection in Shannon's presence.

"You want to go inside now?" She suggested.

"Yeah, sure." He said, taking a towel for himself and drying his hair with it. He gave Shannon a final seething glare, as if she had done something wrong, and followed Erin up the stairs and into his room. Moments later, he found his hand cupping her cheek, and his lips on hers. _Shannon, Shannon, Shannon._ Erin giggled in surprise, and kissed back, letting him slip his tongue into her mouth. As their kisses became more involved, they threw their towels on the floor and fell onto the bed, Boone pulling her towards him. He felt her smile against his lips, and he rolled over so that he was on top of her, kissing her softly.

"Wow, feeling a little excited today, Boone?" She pulled back.

"Am I going too fast?" He asked her, running his hand through her blonde, wet hair.

She shook her head. "Not too fast, not too slow." He looked at her, relieved, and she kissed him again, rolling on top of him so that she was straddling him. He sat up halfway to reach her, and wrapped his arms around her lower back, easing them slowly towards her chest, slipping his hands underneath the fabric of her swimsuit top. Erin sighed, and he thought of Shannon's annoyed sigh when she flipped a page in a magazine, though Erin's sigh wasn't one of annoyance. She pulled back for a moment to untie the halter straps on her swimsuit, and then fell into the kiss again. Boone tugged at the shorts that she had thrown on over her wet swimsuit playfully, but Erin pulled back, holding a pillow to cover her bare breasts.

"Sorry," Boone apologized. "I shouldn't have, I'm sorry, I…"

"It's okay," Erin said. "It's just that, I've never done this before. I mean, I've never had sex."

"Oh," he responded. He had suspected this. But if she wanted to do this, he resolved, he would not pretend she was Shannon. He would try as hard as he possibly could not to, he didn't want to cheat her out of her first time. But he wasn't sure if he had the self control, honestly. "Do you wanna wait?"

"No," she said.

"Are you sure? I mean, I don't want to push you into doing something you don't want to do, Erin."

"No, I want to do it. I mean, I really, really, like you, and as long as we're careful about it, I think we should. We've been dating for like two or three months, and I feel ready." She paused, shifting the pillow against her chest. "Why? Do you not feel ready?"

"No, I feel ready," he smiled, praying that he could remember who this was, and not pretend she was Shannon. "As long as you want to." She responded by removing the pillow from her chest and returning to kissing him. After taking proper precautions, he kissed her long and leisurely, and carefully eased down her shorts. He remembered Shannon's denim shorts that she had worn many days that summer as he did so, and how they clung to her hips so well… _no_, he argued with himself, this wasn't Shannon, it was Erin, his pretty, sweet girlfriend who didn't deserve to be cheated out of her first time. When he unbuttoned the button on her shorts, she gasped, not at all like the gasp when he had felt up Shannon in the taxi cab in Australia, no, because Erin wasn't Shannon, she wasn't at all like Shannon.

Once they were naked and under the covers, he rolled on top of her, guiding his hand over her breasts. She sighed softly as he lined up his body with hers. Not Shannon, not Shannon, not Shannon, he told himself. "You ready?" He murmured. She closed her eyes and nodded quickly.

"I think so," she said. "Um."

"Yeah?"

"Is this going to hurt?" She asked, sounding tense.

"I don't think so," he said. He kissed her neck. "You sure you wanna – "

"Boone," she opened her eyes. "It's fine. Just go…"

He slowly lowered his body against hers, and then into hers. She moaned softly, arching her back as he pressed deeper into her, moving in and out of her. _Not Shannon, not Shannon, not Shannon_… he told himself. He thrust himself harder and deeper into Shannon, _no, Erin,_ he begged himself to think. "Boone," she whispered.

"Is this okay?" He asked Shannon… Erin.

She nodded, digging her fingers into his sides. "God, Boone," she gasped, pressing against him harder. Shannon moaned, whispering unintelligible half-sentences under her breath, and as her moans amplified, she dug her nails deeper into him, and when she climaxed, he came soon after, telling Shannon he loved her, and then he rolled off of her… _It's Erin, you fucking piece of scum_, he said to himself.

How could he do that? He felt like such a terrible person, using a sweet, innocent girl he respected and pretending she was Shannon. She deserved so much better than him, she deserved someone who actually appreciated how great she was… and the worst part was, she didn't even know what he was doing. She was cuddled into him, half-asleep and content, unaware of the battle raging inside of Boone's head. "I love you, too," she murmured into his ear, and Boone almost wanted to tell her what was going on. He wanted to tell her that he liked her, but was in love with his sister, the one who was tanning topless downstairs, not the one who he had just said he loved, who was lying next to him… he was tired of tricking her… but he bit his lip and was silent. "I feel the same. I mean, I thought that not being a virgin would like, change me, but I don't think it did." She said quietly.

"Oh," he winced, feeling like the worst person who had ever walked the earth.

I have to go soon," Erin whispered, burying her head into his neck. "I'm having dinner with my grandparents." She smiled. "Kind of ironic, don't you think?"

"Yeah. My mom will be home soon." He kissed the top of her head, disgusted with himself.

"Okay," she stirred, opening her eyes. "Can you please hand me my top? I would, but I can't reach it."

"Sure, of course!" He said too heartily, as killing her with kindness would change the reality that he pretended she was Shannon during sex. Erin took a quick shower to wash the chlorine off of her, and returned back to Boone's room.

"Are you just going to stay in bed all day?" She laughed.

"Oh!" He said in realization. "No, I'm getting up!"

"Well, okay," she said slowly, and kissed Boone on the lips softly. "See you on Monday, or if you want to call me, we can do something this weekend."

"I'll call you," he said, and then got up to take a shower and drown himself in guilt.

* * *

Late that night, Boone tried to fall asleep unsuccessfully. Maybe it was the guilt that had spread through his body as the hours passed, and the fact that he had just cheated his girlfriend out of her virginity without her knowing. Then again, maybe it was the two hushed voices of Anna and Shannon from her room, gossiping over popcorn and nail polish. Shannon and Anna used to have sleepovers all the time, but as they got older, they substituted sleepovers with each other with sneaking to guys houses, and especially after Boone and Anna broke up, Shannon didn't invite Anna to sleep over very often, because it was still a little awkward between them. Tonight, though, it sounded as if they were having a lot of fun, considering it was almost two in the morning and they had just turned off their blaring hip-hop music. Sabrina and Adam hadn't heard, because they were in a whole different wing of the house.

"Would you turn off the damn music?" Boone had yelled across the hall. "Some people are trying to sleep!"

Shannon came in about thirty seconds later. "Were you saying something?" She had flicked his lights on, practically blinding him because he wasn't accustomed to the light. "I couldn't hear, we were listening to music."

"I know," he tried to make his tone sound dangerous, but Shannon looked so luminous and happy, wearing her usual pajamas – a camisole and boy short underwear from Victoria's Secret, he couldn't bear to sound harsh. "I heard it."

"Okay," she had said impatiently. "So, what's the problem?"

"I'm trying to sleep."

"Aw, poor Boonie baby is twying to sleep?" She asked in baby-talk. "Is it past poor Boonie's bedtime?"

"Shut up, Shannon," he had said, annoyed.

"Did you want me to tuck you in? Or give you a kiss goodnight?" She mocked. "Or sing you a lullaby?"

"No," he said, though the kiss goodnight sounded quite appealing. "You could turn off the music though."

"Ugh," she had rolled her eyes. "Fine."

Now Shannon and Anna were talking in hushed whispers, but Boone could hear pieces of their conversations if he strained his ears. "How's Gabe?" Anna asked Shannon.

"Good," Shannon whispered back. "Sometimes I think he's just using me for sex, though." Boone tensed. How dare some stupid, immature, high school pervert use his beautiful, amazing sister just for her body! How dare he! Boone clenched his fists, anger seeping through him like the guilt about Erin had hours before.

"Well if you think that, he probably is," Anna responded. "Is he good?" Boone cringed, not wanting to picture them doing anything.

"Pretty good, I guess. I've never really had that great sex before." Boone frowned, imagining her in bed with that pervert. Imagining her having an orgasm from that pervert. Oh god, he thought. He had to make her stay away from this Gabe guy.

"You will." Anna convinced Shannon. "The best sex I ever had was your brother," Anna said. "He was so… like, oh my god, I couldn't ever think about anything else for days. But don't tell him I said that."

"Sssshhhh, he's probably listening to you!" Shannon whispered, giggling.

"Oh, whatever," Anna replied. "So," she lowered her voice. "Is it just me or does Boone's girlfriend look exactly like you?" Boone shuddered. Was Shannon going to find out? What would she do? What would she say? And why had Anna said that? She was the only one who knew about how Boone felt, and to mention that… Boone felt betrayed as well as apprehensive, and angry about the dickhead who was using the girl he was in love with.

"Maybe a little. She has the same color hair, I guess. Whatever." Shannon seemed to shrug off Anna's comparison, and Boone's muscles relaxed slightly.

"Sometimes I miss him," Anna changed the subject, but Boone didn't really care about what she was saying now. He was more concerned about Gabe, and Shannon, and if he was going to hurt her. He didn't want his sister getting hurt – he didn't want to find her crying one day because Gabe was cheating on her, or because he had pushed her into something. He wanted to see her laughing, natural and calm. He just wanted her to be happy. That was all he wanted, he thought, rolling over and dozing off to sleep.

_Uh, I hope the sex scene with NotShannon wasn't too painful. It seemed like people liked her, so I thought it was okay. Please review, and say what you especially liked or didn't like! Thanks!_


	22. Chapter 22

_**Tangled Youth**_

**Chapter 22**

Boone sat on the couch, lazily flipping channels on the wide-screen plasma television that no one ever watched. It was Friday night, but Erin was at a weekend long tennis tournament, Shannon was out, and Sabrina was, predictably, at a business dinner with Adam, so Boone was alone in the Carlyle mansion. Boone rarely watched television, but he took the opportunity of being alone to indulge himself in a few mindless hours of television.

But he was interrupted by the screechy ring of the telephone wafting from the kitchen. He groaned, not wanting to move from the couch, where he had been sitting for the past two hours. But he gathered himself off it, and shuffled towards the kitchen in his slippers.

"Hello?" He said groggily, answering the phone.

"Uh, hi," said an awkward sounding voice on the other line said, static in the reception.

"Who's this?" He asked, but he somehow sensed it had something to do with Shannon.

"Uh, this is Jeremy, I'm with, uh… Shannon?"

"Where are you?" He asked, panic in his voice. Where was Shannon? What had happened to her? Was she okay?

"At this party. She kept saying her boyfriend was going to show up, and she was drinking pretty heavily. Dude, she kind of passed out."

"_What_?" Boone almost yelled. "She – what?" He imagined Shannon lying spread-eagled on the ground in a deserted alley somewhere, and shuddered. "Is she okay?"

"I- I think so." The guy on the other line sounded panicked, young, not like a careless frat-boy who would leave Shannon to fend for herself.

"Okay," he tried to calm himself. "What's the address?"

"147 Brenner Street. In Laguna Beach."

"Okay, I'll be there as soon as I can. Thanks, man."

Thirty minutes later, he was carrying Shannon inside their house, his right arm steadily cradled under her thighs, and his left arm around her waist. "Shannon," he said to her unconscious body. "Shannon, you stupid, stupid…" he muttered as he lumbered up the stairs, laden by her weight. He wondered what had caused Shannon to drink so much it would send her into unconsciousness, and he knew that it was vital to wake her up soon.

He sat her on the toilet seat in the bathroom, making sure she wasn't precariously positioned before getting a cold washcloth. He placed it over her forehead, holding it there with his hand. Shannon roused under his touch, made a tiny noise in her throat, and closed her eyes again. "C'mon Shan, wake up!" He whispered hoarsely. "_Shan_…" but she wasn't regaining full consciousness, and her head was cocked dangerously to the left, as if her neck wouldn't stabilize her head. Not knowing what else to do, Boone adjusted her head, lifted her up again, and walked into the walk-in shower, taking one hand from under her to turn the water on cold. He took off her blouse, as she was wearing a camisole underneath, and stood her up against the shower wall, letting the water spray onto her face. She stirred, letting go of Boone for a moment, but then dug her nails into Boone's arms so that she was able to stand. She leaned close to him, her breath, smelling of tequila, breathing onto his shoulder. The shower significantly soaked Shannon's shirt and skirt, and her bare legs. She wasn't wearing a bra.

She groaned softly, her eyes still closed, leaning against Boone for support. "Boone," she murmured, her voice sounding delirious and far away. "What's going on?" She squinted her eyes open, the pressure of the shower mussing her previously neatly tied back hair.

"You drank so much you passed out, at a party. Then I came and took you home." He tried to sound as gentle as possible.

"He was s'pposed to show up!" Shannon whined, still holding on to him.

"Who?"

"_Gabe_." She said. "My boyfriend!"

"He didn't show up?" Boone tried not to sound too hopeful.

"He dinn't show up." Shannon shivered, her wet t-shirt stuck to her body. The outline of her breasts protruded from the thin threadbare of her shirt, and Boone tried not to stare. "I'm cold."

"I can see that."

"Oh my god, you pervert," she groaned, sliding to sit on the shower floor and crossing her arms over her chest. He sat down next to her.

"No, Shannon, I can tell you're cold because…" He traced his finger over her lips. "Your lips are blue." She giggled drunkenly, and turned her head towards Boone. "So," his voice maintained its previous seriousness. "What exactly happened, at that party?"

"Um," She played with her skirt between her fingers. "Gabe didn't show up. He said he would meet me there and he dinn't come." She stumbled over her words a bit. "So I started drinkin' because I thought I could just have fun without him, but it dinn't work and then this guy called… I dunno, Jermy or something, came over, and I was mad so I kissed him. And then he said I should stop drinking, and I went away cuz he dinn't have the right to tell me that. Then I had another drink and next thing I knew, I fell over and I guess he picked me up."

Boone sighed. "You're a drunk whore, just like Anna." If he could tell Shannon his secret, if they were together, he would have taken her in his arms and hugged and kissed her troubles away, but they weren't, so he decided to say something harsh, like he wasn't in love with her.

But Shannon wasn't insulted. "So you finally admit Anna's a whore?" She said lazily.

"Shut up." He helped Shannon stand up, and she grabbed onto him, pulling him towards her. She giggled, tipsiness still evident in her tone, and wrapped her arms around him. "Shannon, don't…" he muttered, trying to concentrate on turning the shower spigot off. She clung onto him still, and Boone had a slight feeling it wasn't just to keep her standing up. But it was probably just his imagination.

"Come here," he said. "Let's go get you some coffee."

"I think I'll just go to bed actually," she pulled away from him, and, stumbling a bit, started walking towards her room. She started to peel her wet shirt off as she walked down the hall, clearly still drunk, and Boone shuddered, watching in awe as her naked, tanned back receded into her bedroom.

God, how he wanted her, he thought as started towards the room. He wanted her so bad, with a mind-blowing intensity that tickled his whole body – he could feel it in his brain, it tickled his face, and it make him weak in the legs. He wanted to run his hand over her naked body in bed, he wanted to make her laugh and cuddle into him… he wanted to be allowed to love her.

But then there was Erin. He was still with Erin, he reminded himself. And he was going to stay with her, and be a good boyfriend, and he wasn't going to pretend she was Shannon again, because that had been terrible of him. In fact, he felt ashamed just thinking about it.

As Boone started to climb into his bed, he heard Shannon calling for him. "Boone?" Her voice echoed through the hall.

"Coming, Shan," he sighed, and walked to her room. "What do you need?"

"Boone?" She whispered from her bed. "Can you sit down?" She beckoned him to sit on the bed.

"Sure," he said slowly, and sat down next to her. "What's up?" Shannon scooted closer to him, and put her hand on his. "What?"

"Could you get me a glass of water?" She asked. Boone pulled away. And here he thought she was actually going to say something important.

"Get your own water," he rolled his eyes, about to get up.

"I'm a little drunk," she responded. "What if I stumble down the stairs and fall on my ass and break my leg?"

"_Fine_," he told her, his voice a mixture of amusement and annoyance.

"With one ice cube!" She called after him. Boone walked down the stairs, and filled up a glass with water, and put exactly one ice cube in it. Then he went back upstairs, only to find Shannon sprawled out on her bed face-down, seemingly asleep.

"At your service, Miss Rutherford," he rolled his eyes. "One water, with a single ice cube."

"Thanks, Boone," she muttered, rolling over. Boone heaved a sigh. What did it take to get some appreciation around here?

"'Night Shannon," he said.

"'Night, Boone," she replied. Boone was just about to close her door when he heard her say, "Boone?"

"Yeah?" He was expecting another request, such as 'fluff my pillow!'

"You're my rock." She said. Boone smiled. There were times when being her servant was all worth it.

"Thanks…"

"I love you, Boone." She was slurring a little, but it still filled Boone with a warmth that pervaded his entire body.

"I love you, too." He closed the door behind him, and headed towards his room.

* * *

The next morning, Boone was in the kitchen making toast when the phone rang. His hands were covered in butter from the bread, so he didn't bother answering it. But on the third ring, Shannon came into the room, wearing Boone's Little League Sweatshirt from 5th grade that read CARLYLE across the back, and handed him the phone. "Your girlfriend," she announced blandly.

"Thanks," he wiped his hands on a dish towel. "Hello?"

"Hey, Boone, it's Erin."

"Hey, Erin, how are you?" He said cheerfully. "I missed you this weekend." He convinced himself. The truth was, he had barely thought about her at all, but she didn't deserve to have her feelings hurt.

"Me too. I missed you a lot. But guess what?"

"What?"

"Gabby and I won second place in the doubles tennis tournament!" Gabby was Erin's tennis partner and best friend from San Diego.

"_Wow_," Boone answered. "Good job!"

"Thanks! But now I have to go home and work on a book report. Have you done that yet?"

"Nope, I need to do that today also."

"Okay," she said. "I'm really excited. This means I'm ranked like 50th in the state for under 18's!"

"That's amazing. I wish I could play tennis."

"I wish you could too, because then we could play together," she replied.

"Uh, maybe tonight we could go out for a little while or something? After we finish our reports?"

"I'm not sure if I'll be able to… but I'll call you when I finish, okay?" She said.

"Sounds good," he said. "I'll see you tonight, then. 'Love you," he added.

"Yeah. Me too," she said sincerely. Boone hung up the phone and was surprised to see Shannon still standing there.

"Bullshit." She said. Boone didn't even try to argue.

_Gah, finally! Special thanks to Deruvius for forcing me to write when I was bored and annoying the crap out of him. Hehe. Hope you liked it, and please review and tell me what you especially liked or didn't like. _


	23. Chapter 23

_**Tangled Youth**_

**Chapter 23**

"As you know, we've been reading a lot of books about family lately," Boone's American Literature teacher, Mrs. Davies announced on Friday. About half of the teachers at St. Gabriel's were nuns, this one, thankfully wasn't. In fact, she was probably one of the cooler teachers he had ever had in his high school career. "Most recently, _East of Eden_ by Steinbeck." She paused, waiting for a straggler to arrive in class. "But today I thought we might do a more informal discussion about family in general. And then I'll have you write a short narrative about a family experience for homework. Does that sound good?"

"Yeah," a few people said.

"Okay. Um, just to begin – a show of hands – how many of you are completely satisfied with your relationships with your family?" Boone kept his hand solidly in his lap. There was the mother he couldn't stand, the absent father, the sister he couldn't get out of his mind… Boone looked around the room and noticed that about a fifth of the class had their hands raised. "Huh. Alicia, what is it about your family, if you don't mind sharing, that you aren't satisfied with?"

"Well," the girl squeaked. "My mom says I'm being rude to her all the time…" she whined. Boone tried not to roll his eyes.

"Okay," Mrs. Davies nodded. "What about…" she stared at her lackluster class. "If no one raises their hand I'm going to have to pick on someone," she warned. Boone tried to disappear into his chair. "Travis, why aren't you satisfied with your family?"

"I dunno." He shrugged. "Guess cuz my parents are divorced and I don't see my mom much."

"Oh," Mrs. Davies said. "How many of you have divorced parents?" Boone, among others, raised his hand. "My parents got divorced when I was eleven. I had to decide whether to live with my mom or dad, and I decided to live with my mom, and because of that, I don't have much of a relationship with my father. And in _East of Eden_, Cal and Aron aren't very close with their mother, are they? Are any of you closer to one parent then the other? Show of hands again. If you're closer to your mom than your dad, raise your hand." Boone hesitated. But then he realized he wasn't close to his mom – he had never been close to his mom. And he had seen his father once in his entire life. But his mother hadn't ever been maternal with him. Or acted as if he were anything but a hassle. So Boone didn't raise his hand. "Closer to fathers?" Boone kept his hand on the desk, hoping the teacher wouldn't notice. "Boone, I noticed you didn't raise your hand." Shit.

"Yeah," he said. "I'm not close to either of my parents. I mean, I live with my mom, but we don't really have much of a relationship."

"And your dad?"

"I've only seen him once before," Boone said stiffly.

"What?" Jerry, the annoying boy from summer school exclaimed. "Dude, you've seen him more than that, _I've_ seen him with you before."

"That's my step-dad." Boone told him, his face reddening. He hated being the center of attention.

"Shannon's not really your sister?" Jerry continued.

"She's my stepsister," Boone said quietly.

"Oh, no wonder you don't look anything alike." Boone felt like socking Jerry in the face. "So, you've only seen your dad _once_? Geez."

"Jerry, if you have something to say, please raise your hand. If Boone wants to elaborate, he will."

"I don't want to elaborate," he looked at the floor, thinking of his father, and how his attempt to rebuild their relationship had failed. Boone spent the rest of the class period feeling detached, and didn't contribute more to the discussion.

"Boone?" Mrs. Davies said to him as he started to leave the classroom when the bell rang.

"Yeah?"

"Um, I just wanted to know if you were okay. I'm sorry if I picked on you."

"I'm fine," he attempted a smile.

"Well, okay," she said dubiously. "Have a nice weekend, Boone."

* * *

It was another lazy Friday afternoon – Shannon at ballet, Sabrina at work, Boone leading Erin upstairs by the hand… now they were making out on his bed, sitting up, and he was working on the buttons of her blouse. She shrugged out of her school uniform skirt, but then pulled back.

"Boone," she tried to steady her voice as he kissed her neck. "I was going to tell you, um," she breathed. "Yesterday I was at the mall, and I saw your sister and her friend in um, the underwear section of Bloomingdales, and they were buying all of these lacy, skimpy things, and I was just standing there buying really average stuff, and… I felt like such a dork."

Boone wondered why she was telling him this, but then realized that it was because she probably felt like she was in competition with Shannon or Anna (probably Anna, as most people weren't in love with their sister). "You're not a dork, Erin," he said.

"Try saying that when you _don't_ have your hand up my shirt, why don't you?" She pushed his hand away good-naturedly.

"Sorry," he grimaced, and moved his hand so that he was holding hers. "Were they mean to you or something?"

"N – no," she looked down. "It wasn't that big of a deal, I'm overreacting."

"Are you okay?" He asked, concerned, trying not to think of Shannon, and how she kept everything to herself when she was upset.

"I'm fine," she said. To reassure him of this, she finished unbuttoning her shirt and carefully placed it on the nightstand. Boone took off his shirt, and pulled her close to him, kissing her gently. He wrapped his arms around her waist, and moved them up slowly to start to take off her bra. She moaned quietly, and murmured something in his ear about getting a condom. Boone nodded, letting her unzip his pants, and grabbed one out of his dresser drawer. Erin was always oddly squeamish about this, Boone had noticed. She scooted away from him and turned around, her eyes squinted shut, as he put it on, and would only turn around when Boone assured her it was "okay".

"You almost done?" She asked, her hand covering one of her eyes.

"Yeah," he said. Erin turned around, pressing her naked body into his. He kissed her again, and then ran his hand across her face. "You ready?"

"Yes," she squeaked, her arms tightening around his waist. He entered her slowly, and Erin closed her eyes, pushing up against him. She moaned as he thrust in and out of her, digging her hands into his sides. They were so caught up in the moment that they didn't hear the footsteps climbing up the stairs.

Before they knew what was happening, they heard a voice outside of the door. "Boone, guess what? I –" the door swung open, and standing there, was Shannon, wearing a pink leotard with a sweatshirt over it. "Holy shit," she mustered, and her jaw dropped. "Oh my _god_! Ew!"

Boone was lost for words, not to mention completely and utterly humiliated. He could feel himself blushing, and Erin looked near tears. "Um," she said, "Oh my gosh, this is so embarrassing. Oh my god, oh my god…" Boone still hadn't said anything.

"H- how about knocking next time, huh, Shannon?" He tried to sound tough, but ended up sounding more like a constipated rodent. Erin moved, looking for some piece of clothing, or pillow to cover up with.

"Jesus, how about locking the door?" Shannon started, staring at Boone. Erin had been facing the window, but now that she had moved, Boone was almost completely exposed to Shannon. "Oh, _god_, ew." She said again. "Fuck, ew!" She shut the door behind her, and it slammed with a satisfying crack.

Erin, meanwhile, looked extremely concerned, and her voice had a hitch in it. "I'm going to

leave now," she squeaked. "That was… oh my goodness," Erin bent over to pick her skirt off the floor. "I knew she was right, I knew it…" she said under her breath, putting on her underwear and her bra. Boone reached for his boxers, and started pulling them on.

"Knew who was right?" Boone said in a relatively normal tone. He grabbed his shirt from behind him. "Erin, you don't have to leave… I mean, it's my fault for not locking the door properly."

"No, I need to go anyhow, it's Friday, and on Friday, I have dinner with my grandma, remember?"

"Yeah – sorry, I knew that." He had actually forgotten – memorizing Shannon's extra-curricular activities had always been easier for him. "Who… uh, who was right?"

"Oh," Erin said distractedly, buttoning her wrinkled shirt. "My mom."

"Wait, _what_? What did you tell your mom?"

"Some people actually have conversations with their parents, Boone."

"Erin, I know that! Geez, it's not my fault, I know I forgot to lock the door and it was embarrassing, and _that_ was my fault, but it's not my fault that I don't have a great relationship with my parents."

"You don't even have a relationship with your parents," she scoffed, but then looked reprimanded. "I'm sorry, that was mean. Was that mean?"

Boone looked down. "My dad left us when my mom was still in the hospital, so you could say I don't have a relationship with him, so yes, that was a little mean."

"I'm sorry. I'm really, really sorry. That was an awful thing to say."

"It's okay," he shrugged, pulling his shirt on over his head. "What did your mom say? About me?"

"Well…" she bit her lip in a Shannon-like gesture. "Please don't be mad, Boone, but I told her about us… about us having sex," she said the last word in a barely audible whisper. "And she got a little mad at first, but then she was okay. And we talked for a while, and she said that something bad would come out of it. And don't you think, that what just happened was sort of a sign? That we shouldn't be?"

"She just walked in on us, it was an accident," Boone failed to see her point.

"Boone…" she shook her head in exasperation. "I like you, okay? I mean, I _love_ you, but I just don't know if I'm comfortable with being this physical all the time."

"Okay," he said. "If you don't want to have sex, then we don't have to." The last thing he wanted to do was push her into something she didn't want to do. Sure, he was a hormonal teenager, so he wasn't exactly _happy_ about it, but he wasn't unhappy either.

"Really?" Erin looked surprised. "Wow, my mom said you would be upset."

"Well, your mom is wrong." Boone half-smiled at her.

Erin smiled back. "I'm glad she's wrong." She finished putting her shoes on. "Oh god, now I have to go downstairs and face Shannon. This is gonna be so embarrassing…"

"It's just Shannon."

"She kind of intimidates me." Erin admitted.

"Believe me, she's not intimidating. You should see her after she has a nightmare."

"What does she do?" _Oh, she climbs into my bed and sometimes makes out with me_, Boone thought.

"She just gets really freaked out," Boone responded.

"Well," Erin said uncomfortably, "I guess I'd better go."

"Should I walk you to the door?" Boone jumped off of the bed.

"Oh, no, that's fine," Erin said tightly. "Um, I'll see you on Monday?"

"You sure you don't want me to – "

"No, it's okay!" She reassured him. "Bye."

"Erin, come here," he stood up, holding his arms out. "Hon, you're not mad at me, are you?"

"I'm not mad at you. This is just awkward," she clarified. Boone wrapped his arms around her to hug her tightly. Erin did the same, and kissed his lips softly before leaving the room.

After Boone took a shower, he went downstairs to get something to eat for dinner. Shannon was in the kitchen drinking a smoothie. "Please tell me you're wearing clothes this time!" She squealed, her hands covering her eyes, as he approached the kitchen.

"No, Shan, I just came downstairs butt-naked to get some dinner," he said facetiously. Shannon closed her eyes even tighter. "_Yes_, Shannon, I'm dressed."

"Okay, good," she tentatively opened her eyes. "Oh, I like that shirt on you," she touched the shoulder of his gray-blue t-shirt. "It goes with your eyes."

"Thank you," Boone opened the refrigerator, looking for something to eat.

"No prob. So, what I was _going_ to tell you, before I walked in on you screwing your girlfriend – " Boone grimaced, "Is that I am now in the highest level of ballet class there is! And I might be able to help teach a kid's class too next year!"

"Really?" Boone turned around, closing the refrigerator. "That's amazing, Shan. I'm really, really proud of you." Boone had always worried that Shannon would quit ballet, and then end up without a real interest, and fall into bad habits. And Boone had watched Shannon practice ballet, moving from size 1 pink ballet slippers to toe shoes as she grew older, since she had moved in. Without really thinking about what he was doing, Boone pulled Shannon into a hug, and she hugged back, nuzzling her head into his shoulder.

"Thanks, Boone," she said sincerely. "I'm glad you're proud of me. I told Gabe, but he didn't really care as much." She didn't let go, sinking into his arms more.

"That's because I'm your brother," he kissed the top of her head, not sure what his words meant.

"Boone?" Shannon said. "Do you wanna rent a dumb chick flick and make some popcorn, and hang out tonight?"

"Uh… what about Anna? Or your boyfriend?" Boone didn't want to sound too eager to watch _Save the Last Dance_, or something similar, at risk of being called gay, or seeming like he wanted to spend time with her too much.

"Anna can get annoying, as you well know," Shannon murmured into his neck, still not letting go. "And Gabe is with his band tonight. So that leaves you, doesn't it?"

"Aw, I guess," he pulled back from the hug, finally. "And we've got nothing to eat, either. Wanna order some pizza?"

"Yeah," she said softly, her hands still softly draped around his wrist.

"Are you okay?" Her touch was so gentle, so warm… he didn't want her to let go.

"Me and Gabe just got in a fight today, that's all." She shrugged. "I'm going to go change into my pajamas."

"Okay," Boone told her. "Hawaiian pizza, right?" Boone and Shannon had little in common, but they both shared a love for Hawaiian flavored pizza, although Sabrina scolded them for having such "low-class" taste.

"Duh," she cocked her head to the side, and started up the stairs. "Seriously, Boone," she turned to face him. "_Lock_ the door next time, okay?"

"I think I've learned my lesson."

"I heard what Erin said, about not wanting to have sex anymore. Damn, she's missing out."

"_What_? You've never – "

"I've heard things from Anna, that's for damn sure. Everyday she has some new insight on your bedroom abilities."

"Great," Boone rolled his eyes. He hoped Anna's insights hadn't included anything about Boone's accidental slip when he had called her Shannon.

"I mean, it's almost like _I've_ had sex with you."

"Oh, god, Shannon, shut up," he grimaced. But Shannon just winked and flitted up the stairs. Boone wondered… were her regular sexual comments towards him meaningless, or did it mean that she wanted him too? It was thoughts like these that kept Boone awake every night.

_Weak ending, I know. But I hope it was ooookay, I had some serious issues with it. Grimaces Please review, and tell me what you liked and didn't like, even though I know this chapter was very bad._


	24. Chapter 24

_**Tangled Youth**_

**Chapter 24**

Now that Shannon was in the highest level of ballet, she danced five days a week – Boone knew that she had techniques class on Monday and Tuesday, a stretching class on Wednesday, point on Thursday, and performance workshop from nine-thirty to one-thirty on Sunday mornings. Shannon had always liked to dance, and when she was younger, she would often call in Boone and her father to watch her give makeshift performances in her bedroom set to Spice Girls songs. Of course, to a normal eleven year old boy, this was ridiculous, but it gave Boone an unexplainable warm feeling throughout his body watching" his sister smiling freely and skipping around the room.

Now, though, he rarely ever got to watch her dance. She had dance performances every once in a while, but she had a habit of never telling anyone when they were being held. Boone wondered why sometimes, was it because she was ashamed of what she loved? Or had she just assumed they didn't care? The last show of hers he had gone to, he bought her a dozen roses, yellow, so they seemed platonic, and Shannon had acted embarrassed and played it down, but Boone caught the reluctant smile apparent on her face right before she turned around to talk to her friends.

It was a Wednesday night, and Boone was finishing his European History homework on the couch as the clock approached 6:15, which was about the time she got home. Sure enough, a few minutes later, Shannon walked in, mumbled hello, and went upstairs to take a shower. Boone wasn't disappointed by her lackluster greeting – he was used to it.

Ten minutes later, Shannon came back downstairs, and sat on the couch next to him, rolling her neck around in a circle. "Shan," he said. "You stole my pajamas, and you're dragging them on the floor."

"Shut up," she replied. "All mine were dirty."

"Yeah, all your clothes are pretty dirty," he smiled at his own joke.

"Funny, Boone," she said sarcastically. She looked over Boone's shoulder at the textbook in his lap. "What are you doing?"

"Reading questions," he replied. "What are you doing?"

"I'm reading over your shoulder," she giggled. _Could she be any more adorable_, Boone thought. "What does it look like I'm doing?"

"I dunno. I kinda thought you were genuinely interested in the Dark Ages."

"I'm genuinely interested in you," she said nonchalantly. Boone wondered what she meant by that? "So, therefore, I'm interested in what you're doing."

"Why are you being so nice, Shan?" He said suspiciously, flashing her a sideways grin.

"Why are you being so mean?" She scooted a little closer to him, breathing against his neck. "Ow!" She suddenly said, grabbing her shoulder. "I pulled a muscle in stretching today."

"You okay, Shannon?" He looked up, and began to stand. "Want me to get you some – " Advil, he would have said, but Shannon grabbed his arm, sitting him back down.

"No, Boone, stay here. Give me a backrub, maybe you can get the crick out?" She asked, biting her lip.

"Okay," he said hesitantly, afraid of touching her. Afraid that the magnetic electricity between them would be too much too handle. "You wanna, uh, turn so I can reach you?"

She turned, breathing in and out, and nodded, coaxing him to start. Boone touched her, and he could feel the warmth of her skin through the tank top she was wearing. He looked down to see his long plaid pajamas dragging on the floor, and shook his head. Shannon had always stolen Boone's clothes to sleep in, as if her clothes were too worthy to for it. Boone never complained. Boone squeezed the side of her collarbone softly. "There?" He asked quietly.

"Nuh uh, closer to my shoulder blade," she shook her head. Boone touched the back of her neck, then the first few vertebrae in her spine, then to the left, towards her shoulder blade. "Oh," she whispered. "That's good." He pressed into her skin, and rubbed up and down her back slowly, wondering. In bed, Shannon was all suppressed sighs and whispers of "that's good", like she had just said now. He tried to chase the thought out of his head, but it wouldn't budge. He ran his hands down her spine, massaging her shoulders deeply. She sighed, a fluttering, airy sigh that motivated him to massage the crick out with increasing vehemence. "Mmmm," she responded.

Shannon and Boone were like that, always taking things a little too far- touching too much, hugging too long, and rubbing her back with too much passion. It all bordered on inappropriate, but there wasn't quite enough proof of its wrongness to be a source of concern, right? Boone exhaled against her neck, and she shivered, arching her back as he pressed into her shoulder just right. "That good?"

"P-perfect," she had her eyes closed. Boone instantly took advantage of the new skin, letting his fingers make tiny imprints in her back. He knew he was getting in too deep, and that he was doing this for much too long, but there was something that wouldn't let him pull away just yet. "Hey, Boone?"

"Uh huh," he kneaded the skin from her shoulders.

"I have some math homework I don't understand, and – " she shuddered. "Could you maybe help me with it after this?" This directly translated to _do my homework for me_. Then Shannon moaned.

"Yeah, sure, whatever, Shan," he answered eagerly. Shannon started untying her wet hair from its hair tie.

"You're right on the part I pulled Boone, just press in a little deeper, and – mmm! You got it," she announced. "Just a little longer, now." Boone dared to knead a little harder, rhythmically massaging and caressing her skin. "That's good," she said in a conclusive manner. But Boone was having a little more difficulty stopping. The relationship between his hand and her back was truly magnetic, there was no other word for it. His brain knew this was wrong, and that he shouldn't be touching his sister like this, especially when he was still with Erin, but thoughts like these hadn't stopped him before. "Or you could… keep going," she sighed. "Yeah, like that," he tickled his hand down her spine. She moved her head back so that her cheek was against Boone's. She sighed again, rolling her head in a half circle. "Boone…" she whispered, as if she was facilitating something. Did she want him to kiss her? No, they couldn't.

"Shan," he said softly, his hand tangled in her hair. "We can't let it happen again, remember?" She nodded listlessly, coaxing him to continue. "No, Shannon, I'm going to stop now. I'm going to pull away," he tried to do what he was saying, slowly untangling his hand, and moving his other hand from supporting the side of her waist. Finally, Shannon willed herself to move away, and she stood up quickly.

"Thanks," she said briskly, almost coldly. "So, what do you know about inverse functions?"

* * *

It was the following Tuesday afternoon, and there were four medium-sized envelopes in front of him on the coffee table. Sabrina was standing behind them, looking intimidating and serious in a black Armani suit. "So," she was saying. "Be prepared for failure, I don't want you getting your hopes up."

"Thanks, mom," he half-smiled, but he was too nervous to say anything else. He had placed the envelopes side by side on the transparent glass table, each from different colleges – UC Berkeley, UCLA, USC, and NYU. "Which should I open first?"

"Berkeley, you won't get in. You didn't do enough community service."

"_Mom_ – "

"I just don't want you to get your hopes up," she reasoned. "Open it. It looks thin, that probably means you've been rejected." Just then, Shannon walked in, oblivious.

"What's going on?" She sat down next to Boone, slightly breathless from ballet. Then she saw the envelopes. "Oh."

"Shannon, maybe you should give your step-brother some space," Sabrina suggested.

"No, Mom, it's fine." He certainly appreciated her presence more than his mother's.

"Open it, Boone," Shannon squeezed his arm comfortingly. "You get really good grades, so I think you'll get in. They'd be crazy not to let you." Boone tore open the Berkeley envelope, and, closing his eyes tightly, took out the packet inside of it. "Oh no!" She exclaimed. He opened his eyes. Shannon put her chin on Boone's shoulder. "It's okay, I'm sure you'll get into the other ones," she soothed him.

Sabrina bore her eyes into Boone. "Well, it was a long shot anyway," she said briskly. "Let me see it," she sat down between Boone and Shannon, breaking them apart. "_Thank you for applying to University of California at Berkeley…_" she announced. "doesn't matter, doesn't matter_… unfortunately we cannot offer you acceptance…_ I knew you should have volunteered at that retirement home."

"Sabrina," Shannon cut in, sitting on the other side of her so that she was next to Boone again. "It's not Boone's fault that it's competitive to get into." She rubbed into his arm again, and Boone shut his eyes, trying to keep from touching her back. "I think it's good you tried, Boone." She looked maliciously at Sabrina, and, for good measure, gave Boone a kiss on the cheek. His skin stung and burned from where her lips had been.

"Shannon, don't," Sabrina said ineffectually. "Open the next one, Boone."

Boone slowly opened the envelope for UCLA. A thicker packet fell out. "I got in," he said, reading the first page. "I got in!" But he couldn't say anything after that because he was engulfed in a hug by his mother and Shannon. His mother never hugged him, so it was especially awkward. But Shannon hung all over him all the time, not that Sabrina knew that. "I knew you'd get in!" Shannon exclaimed. "And this way, you'll be nearby so I can visit a lot!"

"Thanks, Shan," he couldn't keep the smile off his face. "But I have two more envelopes to open."

"You're not seriously considering going to New York, are you?" She asked softly, her body still pressed against his side. Actually, he had been. In fact, it was his first choice.

"Um," he said, and ripped open the USC one to postpone the tension. "I got in to USC…" he tried. Sabrina beamed, but Shannon just shrugged.

"That's good," she smiled weakly. "Open the other one." She handed Boone the thick white envelope, and Boone took it from her, his hands shaking slightly. He tentatively tore open the seal.

"Uh," he read the first page of the packet. "_We are_… _we are_… _We are pleased to offer you acceptance to New York University_." His heart felt like it was sinking and lifting at the same time. He was ecstatic that he had gotten into such a prestigious school, thrilled at the thought of leaving the world of blonde surf-bums behind, but the girl sunk into his shoulder put a dent into those feelings.

"Boone," she said. "You're not, I mean… do you wanna go there?" But Sabrina interrupted her before Boone could answer.

"I've always wanted you to go to college on the East Coast. It would be good for you, to get a taste of the other side of the country, and there's many programs there that could – "

"Boone!" Shannon whined. "You can't go to the other side of the country and – "

"Shannon, let him think. Boone, all three choices are good schools. But if you want to do anything in business, which I, frankly, would suggest, then there are many more large scale corporations in New York, and – " Sabrina cut in.

"Sabrina, stop trying to convince him! If he doesn't want to go, he doesn't have to! Right, Boone?" Shannon sounded weak, and it almost made Boone want to reconsider. "_Boone_?"

"Boone?" Sabrina asked expectantly. "What do you think? You have an allotted amount of time to decide, I think it says on the – " she grabbed the page from Boone's hands.

"Sabrina! He wants to stay here!" Her attention switched back to Boone, "There's nice weather, and there's your _family_, and there's me… Boone, you wouldn't leave me, would you?" Boone bit his lip. He loved her so much, but he didn't think he would ever get the same kind of love back, though she was being unnaturally compassionate right now, and he wasn't sure if he wanted to change his life goals, and stay in California when all he wanted was to leave. And maybe if he did, he would be able to stifle the inappropriate feelings he had for her.

"Boone, _respond_!" Sabrina commanded. "This isn't the behavior of someone who got what you did on the SAT!" Boone refrained from pointing out that that was because she had paid for over a thousand dollars of SAT prep.

"Um," he had no idea how to respond. "I don't really know what to say. I mean, I want to go to NYU, but… I mean, it's far, and… you know, it's far." Shannon started to stand up, sighing audibly.

"I can't believe you!" She exclaimed, tears welling up in her eyes. "God, Boone, I can't fucking believe you! You're supposed to _care_ about me! What am I going to do without you?" She sobbed.

"Shan, I'm really, really sorry. It's not final, and we – " Boone struggled to comfort her. It was the most awful feeling, having her this angry with him. He deserved to be punished, he decided, for making his beautiful, amazing, wonderful little sister cry.

"I don't even have a reason to believe anything you tell me!" She yelled. "I hate you!" And on that note, she ran up the stairs, and all Boone could hear was the ferocious slam of the door to her room seconds later.

"Don't let that girl manipulate you into compromising what you want, Boone." Sabrina said icily, as if she understood everything that was happening in Boone's brain. "Congratulations," she finished coldly, her words dripping with disdain. But Boone was still thinking about what Shannon had said. Hate, it was the exact opposite of how Boone felt. And while he knew it was temporary, the word still punctured his skin, and ran through his bloodstream like a lethal drug.


	25. Chapter 25

_**Tangled Youth**_

**Chapter 25**

Shannon hadn't spoken to Boone in four days. But Sabrina certainly had, lecturing him and encouraging him to go to New York. And even though Shannon's glares and silence was difficult to bear, Sabrina convinced him that she would come around. On the fourth day, Boone was sitting at the kitchen table, the registration form for NYU in front of him, as he ate breakfast, when Shannon came in.

"You're going, aren't you? You're going to NYU?" Her voice sounded breezy, detached, but her tone was strained, like there was something more beneath it. She was wearing a bathrobe, and her hair was in a messy bun, and her eyes appeared watery, her eyelashes clumped together from mascara she had forgotten to take off the night before. Still, Boone couldn't remember a time when she had looked like she had needed him more.

"I'll still visit," was all he could muster. "I'm sorry, I really am sorry, but I really need a change of environment. I've lived in Southern California my whole life, and –"

"Save it, okay? If I cared I would have said something by now!"

Boone sighed. He knew she cared, but he also knew that he deserved this. "Okay, Shan, but sooner or later you'll have to forgive me. And even if I'm on the other side of the country, we'll still be brother and sister and we'll still be close. I promise, and you can visit over breaks and everything."

"_Thanks_, but I need to get to ballet. And I won't be home until late because I'll be at Gabe's house. Actually, could you tell Sabrina I'm staying over at Anna's? I might not make it back 'till morning." Shannon said coolly, purposely trying to provoke him.

"You're a slut," he said, trying to be angry.

"You're a selfish bastard," she said back. "And stupid. You know you only got in to all those schools because of Sabrina's connections."

"Well, you only have a boyfriend because you'll do things with him that no one else is slutty enough to do!" He didn't mean it, but he had heard one of Gabe's friends say that in the locker room. He had clenched his fists at the time, ready to punch Gabe into oblivion, but now it seemed like the perfect comeback. But he knew it was cruel, and the brief victory of what he had said wore off before he had even finished the sentence. Shannon blinked, and her mouth twisted slightly.

"Wh- who told you – " but she recovered quickly. "Whatever. I'm above your stupid made-up insults, you're just a selfish coward, and I _hate_ you. I mean it, you make me _sick_!" And with that, she turned on her heel and exited the kitchen.

"Shannon, wait!" He tried to stop her, but she was already gone. Boone knew that he was making the right decision, and he knew that Shannon would get over it, but her anger still made Boone uneasy. Still, he picked up his pen and began to sign the paper.

* * *

The next day, a balmy Sunday, he invited Erin over to tell her about his decision. Also, he felt as if he'd been neglecting her lately. He knew he should want to spend time with her, and not just out of obligation, but that was the problem with starting a relationship with someone because she looked like Shannon. But, he reasoned with himself, he and Erin shared more interests – the same music taste, similar political views, and he enjoyed being with her. He must be in love with her, right? Not as much as he loved Shannon, but he would never love anyone as much as Shannon.

When Erin arrived at the door, he enveloped her in a warm hug, and she reciprocated with pleasure. "I've missed you lately," she pulled back. "So, guess where I went this morning?"

"Where?" He played along, having no idea what she was talking about.

"Well, I went to church for the first time in months, and I really, you know, like, felt connected to what the priest was saying. I mean, I've really been missing out."

"Oh." Boone had absolutely no idea how to respond to this, or the cross necklace she was wearing. "Are you… Protestant?"

"No, I'm Catholic," she said earnestly. "That means I get to do confessions and everything. I did one today, actually," she looked down. "And what we talked about on Friday? I'm going to stick with that decision."

Boone looked at her guiltily. "Um, are you like, going to Hell because of me?"

"I hope not," she smiled. "So, you said you had to tell me something? I have something… well, something else, to tell you, too."

"Okay," he said agreeably, not sure what to make of her new found Catholicism. "Come on in," he led her to the kitchen. "Want something to drink?"

"Sure, I could have some water." But when Boone arrived in the kitchen, he was surprised to find Shannon in there. She _still_ wasn't speaking to him. Well, she was, but nothing particularly nice came out of her mouth when she did, indeed, speak.

"Hey, Erin," Shannon rolled her eyes. "You here so he can tell you the _big news_?" Shannon brushed past Boone, and opened the refrigerator. "Get out of the way, asshole." She muttered to him. Boone didn't move. It wasn't his fault he wanted to go to the school of his choice.

"Shannon, quit trying to make me feel guilty, because I have nothing to be guilty about!" _Except leaving my baby sister to move across the country_, he thought. And he _did_ feel guilty, even if he shouldn't. But she was his responsibility, and he was her rock, apparently, and each glare Shannon shot him was another reason for him to stay in California.

"Boone, what's going on?" Erin asked suspiciously. "Why should you be guilty?" Shannon smirked, taking a Diet soda out of the refrigerator and sitting on the kitchen counter, her tiny pleated skirt riding up in the thighs. Boone tried desperately not to notice the new skin. But, despite his efforts, his eyes grazed over her smooth legs appreciatively. His eyes seemed magnetized to her body. Shannon crossed her legs, turning away, and Erin looked at Boone expectantly. "Boone?" She wrinkled her nose. "I'm talking to you?"

"Sorry, Erin," he tore his eyes from Shannon. "Um, so I needed to tell you, um – " Erin looked at Shannon, and back to Boone. "Oh! Shannon, could you maybe give Erin and I a minute?"

"Whatever," she said coolly, but she touched the side of his shirt as she left the room. Erin smiled sickeningly at both Shannon and Boone, but it was rather ill-humored.

"So?" Erin asked expectantly.

"Well, I got my college acceptance and rejection letters, and I was accepted into NYU, and, even though it's a big move, I think I'm going to go."

"That's great!" She exclaimed. "Oh my god – I mean, gosh!" She gave Boone a huge hug. "Guess what? I'm going to college in Oregon! At University of Oregon! I thought you'd be really upset, but you're going away too, so, it's perfect!"

"Yeah, I guess it is," Boone smiled, relieved that her reaction was at the opposite end of the spectrum as Shannon's. "So, where does this, um… put our relationship? Do you wanna just play it by ear?"

"Okay," she said somberly. "Let's just stay together until the end of the summer and then see where we are then."

"Good," he nodded. "So, you wanna go get some lunch?"

After lunch, Boone called his friend Kevin to tell him about his college choice. "So, I'm going to NYU," he told him.

"Dude, are you serious? I'm going to like, California State Hayward or whatever. You must be really smart, man," he responded. "So, how's life? Besides that?"

"Well, Erin's decided to be all Catholic now." Boone said.

"Does that mean no more sex? Dude, that sucks. Were you that bad?" He instantly assumed.

"What?"

"I mean, were you that bad in bed to make her want to not screw you?"

"I hadn't thought of it that way," Boone said slowly. But remembering how Anna had raved about his bedroom abilities to Shannon that one night, Boone didn't think this was a serious possibility. "I don't think so, though."

"Yeah, neither do I. I was talking to Anna about it a few days ago, it just sort of came up." Kevin said.

"Why were you talking to Anna? Are you guys friends?" As far as Boone was concerned, they hadn't ever spoken.

"Well, uh… that's what I was going to tell you. I hope it's okay. But, last weekend, I kind of ran into her, and we ended up hooking up." Kevin confessed. "Is that okay?"

"Um," Boone tried to stifle a laugh. He should be jealous, but he was actually vaguely amused. "Yeah, sure."

"Well, that's good. The girl is _hot_." Kevin sighed.

"Well, good luck. She's well aware of that fact." _She'll sleep with anything that moves_, he elaborated in his mind.

"Yeah… So, good about the college thing. But I gotta go. See you," Kevin said, sounding relieved. "Bye."

Boone hung up. He should be more excited about moving, or apprehensive, or feel _something_, but all he could dwell on was that Shannon wasn't talking to him. What if they never spoke again? They fought all the time, but what if this fight was… more? Boone sighed, trying to think more positive thoughts, but his thoughts were interrupted shortly after when his mother and Adam arrived home, announcing that they were going out for dinner. _Well, this is going to put the din in dinner_, he thought, anticipating a screaming match initiated by Shannon.

_I hope you liked it. It seemed a little like a filler, but I think/ hope it was a necessary filler. The review button wants some attention, and what better way than to review my story? Thanks, and I really appreciate your input._


	26. Chapter 26

_**Tangled Youth**_

**Chapter 26**

Shannon was currently blasting Pink, and the catchy pop melodies wafted down the hall through her closed door. She was screaming along with Pink's strained vocals, something about, "_You can run over me with your 18 wheeler but you can't keep me down!"_

Minutes before, she had stormed through the house, thrown her Dolce and Gabbana purse on the couch haphazardly, ignoring Boone, who had been downstairs making iced tea to relieve himself from the abnormally hot May weather. "Fuck! I hate him!" Shannon had screamed, not even checking to see if Sabrina was home.

"Shan, what's – " he had started, but she had cut him off with another screechy "_Fuck!"_ Not that he had expected an answer, because she still wasn't speaking to him.

Now, it could be inferred, what with the girl power music and occasional "screw him!" that she had just broken up with her boyfriend, Gabe. And Boone felt cruel when he noticed the corners of his lips turning up into a spiteful smile. Maybe if she didn't have a boyfriend, she would want to be with _him_. God, he was so full of contradictions! He wanted her to be happy, but at the same time, he was secretly thrilled at finding out she was single again.

Earlier that week, he had asked Erin to go the Prom with him, and she had willingly accepted. Ever since her newfound Catholicism, she had been noticeably less enthralled with Boone, replacing their afternoon trysts for long conversations about God. Boone had asked Kevin for advice about the situation, but they decided it was hopeless, because, in the eloquent words of Kevin, "You can't break up with her now, man, cuz then it'll seem like you were only with her so you guys could like, bang." So Boone was still with her, and they were going to prom together.

Shannon was going with Gabe, but now, Boone suspected, as Shannon sang, "_I won't give a fuck…"_ that these plans were going to be rethought. Kevin and Anna, on the other hand, had decided to ditch Prom to go smoke pot, and do other things that Boone did not want to think about. Boone and Shannon, in the few words they had exchanged in the past few months, had intelligently neglected to inform Sabrina or Adam of their friend's alternate plans.

Now, from his place at his desk doing math homework, Boone was becoming entirely fed up with the new choice of music, Dashboard Confessional. "_Your hair, is everywhere, screaming infidelities, taking its toll…_" she sang, but with a wavering sensitivity she had lacked when singing along with Pink. She hit every note perfectly, drowning out Chris Carraba's overly eager voice. Boone closed his eyes, unable to concentrate on Calculus now, letting himself be caught up with his sister's smooth voice. But her voice became increasingly shaky as the song continued, and when the song was over, she turned off the music, and he could hear her collapse into silent sobs. Even though they were in a fight, Boone couldn't help but stand up, walk down the hall, and softly knock on the door.

"Go away," she blubbered.

He sighed. "Shan, what happened?"

"Like you care!" She sobbed. "If you cared about me at all, you wouldn't be moving across the country."

"Shan, I care. I wanna know what's wrong. I wanna help you," he tried not to sound too eager.

"I don't want your help," her voice cracked. "Would you just go away!"

"Fine," he said, "I'll leave."

But later that night, before he turned off his lights, Shannon's familiar silhouette appeared in his doorway. She wordlessly walked into the room, closing the door behind her, and motioned for Boone to scoot over. Boone bore his blue eyes into her soft brown ones, trying to read her expression for some signal of forgiveness. She blinked, looking away, climbing underneath his covers. That was how Shannon and Boone were, going by the "forgive and forget" method, though they both knew that one day there would be too many "forgets" to forgive. She lay on her back, barely inches from him, completely quiet. She flicked off the light switch, her face contorted into a stony expression. "Shan?" He said finally. But he wasn't able to finish his thought because before he knew it, he was catching Shannon's tears with his t-shirt, her face buried into the crook of his neck, their closest contact in weeks.

"Why can't I just be mad at you?" She cried. "I wanna be mad at you, but I just can't!"

Boone was unsure of what to say, but too afraid to try to touch her. "I'm sorry. I wanna stay here with you, but NYU isn't moving here anytime soon."

"He said the most awful things to me!" She changed the subject, snuggling closer to Boone, her soft breasts against his arm. "He's on… he's on a lot of drugs, did you know that? And he was high and he said the most terrible things about me, about our relationship, about… about us…"

"What did he say about us?" He tried not to overreact, imagining Gabe doing drugs in front of his innocent, angelic sister, and the possibility that he might know about their relationship…

"Oh, you know… stuff." She sniffled. "Do you remember last time we were like this, Boone? When I told you about my mom, remember?"

"How could I forget?" He answered wryly, knowing that he would probably remember that night for the remainder of his life.

She dug her nails into his arm, letting out another gasping sob. "I told him I was fed up with all his bullshit, but he was too high to care. And he was always kind of… teasing me with the needles and the powder and the joints… but at the same time, I kind of fell for him, you know?" She breathed, as Boone imagined himself beating that fucking bastard into oblivion, who he now despised with every bit of blood in his entire body. "Sometimes I'll just get these random flashes of finding her, finding her dead on the floor. And I got one of those a few nights ago when we were… when…" Boone still hadn't reciprocated any of her gentle touches. "Please hold me, Boone," she cried. Shivering, he wrapped his arms around her waist, gently rocking her back and forth in his arms, whispering to her that it would be okay, even though he wasn't sure it would be. After a few minutes of competing with her sobs with soft condolences in her ear, he heard the door slam downstairs.

"Oh no," he said. "She's home."

"Will she make me leave?" Shannon's voice was stable, but strained.

"If you're quiet, she won't notice," Boone tightened his grip around her waist.

"She doesn't like us being close, you know," Shannon said dully.

"I know, but she sets this double standard. She doesn't want us to be close, but she doesn't want us fighting either."

"Shhh," she whispered harshly. They were completely silent, holding onto each other as if they were going to be attacked. Boone heard the click-clack of his mother's heels on the wood hallway, praying that they wouldn't open his door. But when he heard the sound of the doorknob turning, there was nothing they could do.

"Boone?" Sabrina said, and Boone could detect traces of suspicion in her voice. But then she noticed Shannon's presence. "I've been telling you for years you're way too old for this!" She exclaimed, her voice rising. "Look, I can't deal with this right now!" She yelled, slamming the door. "I'm going to bed."

"Shan," Boone tried after a few moments, the sound of the door slamming resonating in his ears. She didn't respond. "Shannon?" She shook her head against his chest, not wanting to respond.

"I don't wanna leave," she finally whispered. "Please don't make me leave. I keep thinking about her, and I can't think about her alone. It's too much. Please, Boone."

"You can stay here as long as you want," he looked at her, the source of his greatest frustration, lovingly. He couldn't say no to her. He hadn't ever been able to, and he probably never would be. He kissed her on the forehead, _I love you_, he thought, and tried to settle himself into that comfortable escape called sleep.

The next morning, Saturday, Boone was awoken by his cell phone around nine in the morning. He rolled onto his side, pleased but slightly guilty to see Shannon's peaceful form sleeping, her body touching his. He carefully slid out of the bed, careful not to disturb her.

"Hello?" He said nervously, trying to silence the blaring ring. Shannon opened her eyes, rubbing sleep out of her eyes.

"Boone?" It was Erin. "Did I wake you up?"

"Yeah, but it's okay," he replied. Shannon stretched, the covers pulled right up against her chin.

"Boone," Shannon groaned. "Whose on the phone? What time is – " He shushed her, but it was too late.

"Who are you talking to?" Erin asked.

"Shannon," he said instinctively.

"But I thought I woke you up," he wished she would just drop it.

"Yeah, you did," he hoped he didn't sound annoyed, even though he was.

"So why was she in your room?"

"She just… came in," he tried to think of an appropriate reply.

"Boone, I've…" she sighed. "Boone, I've heard some things, well, I don't wanna do this over the phone, but, um," she started to get a little hysterical.

"I think we need to talk," the words came flooding from his mouth. He hadn't been meaning to utter those notorious words, especially the week before prom, but he somehow ended up blurting it out anyway.

"I was just going to say that."

"Boone, come back to bed, I'm cold," Shannon said innocently. Maybe she hadn't realized it was Erin on the phone, or maybe she did, but either way, she had said the _wrong_ thing at the wrong time.

"That's not Shannon in there, is it?" Erin said flatly.

"Look, I don't know how to explain this, but – " he started. "Shannon had a nightmare last night and came into my room."

"Oh my," Erin sounded distressed. "Oh my god." It almost sounded as if she had wanted it to be another girl. Could she… know? "I mean, gosh. Oh my gosh." Boone breathed into the receiver, not sure what to say. "We definitely need to talk, Boone. Why don't I come over later?" She said sternly, like a mother to a child who had tracked muddy shoes into the house.

"Yeah. Um, bye." He hung up the phone, confused, and annoyed with _both_ Erin and Shannon.

"I'm sorry," she pulled the covers even closer around her face. "I'm really sorry." Her eyes were stained with last night's tears, her hair framed her face in an unflattering circle of frizz, but her expression was so sincere and so endearing that he couldn't bear to be angry with her. He slid back under the covers, putting his worries about Erin aside, and she held onto him, giggling and closing her eyes again. He watched her for awhile, her perfect blonde eyelashes fluttering in her sleep, and he realized that his relationship with Erin had already been over for a long time.

When Erin came over that afternoon, she was all business. No greeting, no small talk, just right to the chase. "What do you want to talk about?" She asked, still standing on the doorstep, lips pursed, sunglasses still on her eyes, cross necklace perfectly in place.

"I think it's pretty clear that there's a space between us that… can't be filled." He beckoned for her to come in, but she ignored the gesture.

She took off her sunglasses. "Can't be filled, or you just don't want to fill it? You don't care enough to?"

Boone looked away. "Erin, look – "

"Boone, I know there's someone else, so could you please stop denying it?"

"I'm not cheating on you, Erin. I'm not," he tried to convince her, but his voice ended up adopting the tone of an overeager preschooler.

"Look," her face fell, and she put her sunglasses in her bag, metaphorically dropping the ice queen act. "I've been thinking about this a lot, and I…" she frowned, looking pained. "I really hope this isn't true, but like I said earlier, I've… I've heard some things…" Boone's eyes widened. He wanted to deny it, but his mouth had stopped working. So he just stood there, staring blankly at her.

"W-what kinds of things?" He was able to stutter, trying to sound blasé.

Erin looked disgusted. "About you and Shannon. And I've seen the way you look at her…" now she was fighting back tears. "I didn't want to believe it Boone, but," a sob escaped her lips, "I've been denying it for a while and it… seems pretty clear to me that you've been distracted through our," she wiped tears from her eyes, losing track of the speech she had obviously prepared beforehand. "Through our relationship," she continued, and Boone was still speechless. "I came here so you could tell me it's not true. But what I heard on the phone this morning hasn't exactly convinced me. So, it's up to you to tell me the truth." she finished. Boone didn't respond, just stared at the floor at her shoes, the ones that were so much like the one's Shannon wore. "It's…" she tried. "It's not true, right?"

"We're not really brother and sister," he said, his voice barely above a whisper. "My mom married her Dad when we were eight and ten."

Erin closed her eyes in frustration, trying not to completely blow up. "Obviously, we're done."

"I guess so. I'm really sorry, Erin…" he said meekly.

"You know, it was incredibly low of you to pretend I was her. Is that why you asked me out the first day at summer school? Because I look like her?" She tucked her long blonde hair behind her ear. "Don't answer that." She said before he could open his mouth. "I should go. I guess this is goodbye."

"Erin, it's not like we've ever done anything together. I just, I have these feelings for her I can't seem to get rid of, and – " Erin shook her head slowly.

"I don't want to be a stand-in girl. I need to find someone who will appreciate me for me. I'm sure you could understand that."

"I'm really sorry," he said sincerely. "I wish it didn't have to… be this way. Especially the week before Prom." She shrugged.

"I can't make it to Prom anyway," she announced coolly, putting her sunglasses back on her eyes, readopting the ice queen act. "Bye, Boone."

"Bye?" he responded, and stood in the doorway long after she disappeared. When the sky began to morph to shades of aubergine, he felt two arms wrapping around his neck from behind him.

"So, are you going to miss your own Prom?" Shannon asked hesitantly.

"I dunno," he shrugged her off, not wanting to be influenced by her touch at the moment. "Hadn't really thought about it."

"Well, I'm obviously not going with Gabe, so… would it be weird if we went together?" Boone tried not to look too excited. "Christina Berens is going with her big brother." He loved the way Shannon said 'big brother', for some reason.

"If you're okay with that," he kept his voice level. "Then I'd love to go to Prom with you."

She smiled, a full, genuine smile – the kind of smile that gave Boone the will to live when he was feeling down. "I love you, Big Brother," she said deprecatingly, and gave him a kiss on the cheek, leaving the room. "Would you friggin' close the god damn door? You've been standing there for hours."_Well,_ thought Boone, closing the door _he hadn't expected the fairy-tale moment to last forever._

_Thanks for reading! Please review, and say what you liked/didn't like! It's especially helpful if you tell me which lines you thought were funny or good, or awkward sounding and stupid. Any kind of feedback is good. Thanks!_


	27. Chapter 27

_**Tangled Youth**_

**Chapter 27**

Boone knew that girls made a huge deal about the Prom, but this was ridiculous. On Monday after ballet, Shannon had taken her four dress possibilities that she had purchased in _December_ and tried them all on, finally deciding on a midnight blue dress that had cost almost a grand at Louis Vuitton. At St. Gabriel's, there was a rule that none of the girl's could wear dresses exposing excessive cleavage, but Shannon had worked around that rule – her dress was completely backless and had a slit up the side about a mile long.

On Tuesday, Boone had watched Shannon from between the slats of his window shades perfecting her tan downstairs by the pool, and afterwards, he had done some things behind the closed door of his room that he wasn't exactly proud of. When the sun went down, Shannon went into the bathroom for approximately an hour, making a mess with a container of self-tanner that claimed to last an entire week. On Wednesday, Shannon went to the spa for the afternoon with some friends from ballet, where she had a facial and a massage.

On Thursday, she had her nails done, and on Friday, she convinced her father to let her leave school early to get her hair done. But it was all worth it, because when Shannon exited her room on Prom Night before they left, she looked like a goddess. Well, a little too naughty to be a goddess. But either way, he had never seen her look so incredibly delicious.

"You're in deep shit if you didn't get me a corsage," she said, turning around to display inches and inches of bare back that the dress didn't cover. "How do I look?"

"Beyond amazing," he sputtered, feeling like a nerd who was too shy to talk to the popular girl of his dreams. "Here's the corsage thing."

"Don't poke me!" She squealed, surprising him and causing him to prick her with the pin of the corsage. "Jesus, Boone! It's bad enough I'm going to the Prom with my friggin' brother, but now you hurt me too!"

"Could be worse," he said absently.

"You're right. I mean, you know we're going to be the hottest people there. I mean, look at us." She looked Boone up and down. "Look at those eyes, and those lips, and that ass." And now he knew she was purposely torturing him. "And of course, I've got the legs, and the hair, and the face…"

"And boobs," he added in without thinking. "I mean, the… the…" But Shannon ignored his idiotic reply.

"Are we genetically blessed or what?" Boone knew that if he agreed _or_ disagreed with her, she would use it against him, and he didn't want to say anything he should keep to himself again, so he just smiled innocently, and led her outside to the car.

* * *

A few minutes later, they were standing at the entrance of the hotel where the dance was taking place. Shannon was constantly messing with her hair, or her dress, or her shoes, and Boone wanted to tell her how many thousands of ways of gorgeous she looked, but he kept his mouth shut at risk of saying something completely idiotic like "bootylicious". That would be almost as bad as him saying "fo shizzle" or "mah girls" or wearing bling-bling. Boone laughed to himself at how ridiculous his thoughts were.

"What are you laughing about, pretty boy?" She narrowed her eyes playfully at him.

"Nothing," he smiled.

"God, I can't _believe_ I'm going to Prom with my brother." She said again, looking down. If it bothered her so much, then why was she doing it? He knew she could have managed to find a date over the week.

"Whatever," he said tightly.

"You could have found some hot blonde to go with, I'm sure. You should hear the girls in the locker room, so many of them want you _so_ bad," she noted. _I am going with some hot blonde_, he thought. "And you're like, not a player or anything either, which is a huge turn on." She corrected herself. "For them, I mean."

"Yeah. Uh, you wanna go in or are we just going to stand here all night?" He held out his arm to her, which she took brusquely.

"Chill out, Boone, yes, we are going in." They walked inside the large room that the school had booked for the night. They had arrived fashionably late, to Shannon's discretion, but many eyes still wandered in their direction when they walked through the room. "That girl over there is eye raping you," Shannon whispered in his ear, pointing to a busty brunette that may as well have been invisible in comparison to Shannon. But every single girl in the room, he thought, no one besides Shannon really did anything for him. She just _had_ to be his sister, didn't she?

Within seconds, Shannon had abandoned his arm, and disappeared into the sea of people in the elaborately decorated room. Boone couldn't even keep track of her, this little flash of navy blue moving around the room. The brunette girl who had been "eye raping" him, Rachel, he was pretty sure her name was, approached him.

"Hey," she smiled. "Are you in my science class?"

"Yeah," he responded, not entirely sure.

"Did you come with your sister?" _No duh, that's why I walked in with her._

"Yeah. You?"

"I don't have a sister," she said, her eyes wide and gullible.

"I gotta go," he patted her on the shoulder, sympathetic to her stupidity. He walked towards the drink table, craning his neck, trying to find Shannon. She was standing in a circle of popular people, laughing, her eyes full of mirth as she joked with a few attractive girls around her. There were also a bunch of guys, a few of them touching Shannon lightly every so often, but it was enough to perturb Boone.

"You clean up nicely," Boone looked over to see Kristy, who he actually hadn't seen in a very long time.

"Thanks, you look nice too." He said uncomfortably. She did look nice, her hair was done in waves, and her dress was slutty and red like almost everyone's in the room.

"You wanna freak?" she asked, referring to the loud rap song that was currently playing.

"Sorry, not right now, I'm.. uh… eating." He grabbed a grape from the table to prove his point. She laughed.

"Do I make you nervous?" She giggled.

"No," he said flatly. "I'm just hungry."

"Where did you get this jacket?" She purred, scratching her fake nails across Boone's sleeve.

"I'm not sure," he answered uncomfortably. "Look Kristy, I like you, but I don't – "

"Excuse me," suddenly squeaked a girl behind him, trying to reach a cookie on the platter on the table in front of Boone.

"Sure," he said distractedly. Kristy made an annoyed sound, and walked off huffily.

"Boone?" The other girl raised her eyebrows. What was her name?

"Taylor! My lab partner from… biology last year?" He remembered.

"Yeah," Taylor replied, fidgeting with her halter-top pink dress. "Where's Erin?"

"We broke up," he said.

"Oh my god, I'm so sorry!" She touched his arm quickly. "You guys were _too_ cute."

"It's really okay, it was a mutual thing," he said. "I came with my sister, actually."

"Aw, are you guys close?"

"Well, she's not exactly happy about it," he said wryly.

"Oh. Well, I came with some friends," she said.

He glanced quickly back at Shannon, who had her arms around a sandy-haired boy and was getting ready to slow-dance with him as some cheesy ballad blasted through the room. "So," he found himself asking Taylor. "You wanna dance?"

She looked extremely enthused. "Okay, yeah!" She put her arms around his neck, and his around her waist. Shannon was still draped over the blonde guy, so Boone stared meaningfully at her and pulled Taylor closer to him. Shannon glared back, and he tried to scowl, not blinking. His expression must have been amusing, because Shannon burst out laughing, much to the confusion of her newest boy toy.

"_What_?" He mouthed to Shannon. She shook her head against the guy's neck, still smiling. Then the guy with her turned her around, so that her back was facing Boone.

"Where are you going to college?" Taylor asked, looking up at him.

"NYU," he answered. "What about you?" His decision was final, though he was ambivalent about it.

"Wow, East Coast. I'm going to USC." She shrugged.

"That's cool." He glanced quickly over at Shannon, who caught his eyes and looked at him mischievously. He couldn't discern if it was just a smile, or if it had been… suggestive. But the longer they looked at each other, the more convinced he was that her look had indeed been intended that way. Taylor put her head on Boone's shoulder, and Shannon nuzzled her chin into her guy's neck. But her eyes were still centered on Boone, and he returned the look with the same touch of mischief in his eyes. Shannon continued to stare at him, and as the song progressed, the look in her eyes became more and more overtly sexual, and he was sure now it wasn't his imagination. Finally Shannon lay a soft kiss on her partner's neck, still not averting her gaze. Then she did it again, sending shivers down Boone's spine. But his pleasure was quickly replaced when Shannon turned back to the guy she was dancing with and started kissing him more fully on the lips. Boone jerked his head away, looking back at Taylor, trying to calm himself.

"You okay?" She asked.

"I'm fine." Luckily, just then, the song ended, and Boone excused himself politely. He stormed outside, and sat on a bench, needing some air after Shannon's behavior. The night air was cool and calming, or it would have been, had he not been joined shortly after by Shannon herself, who sat down next to him and crossed her knees carefully.

"You take everything too seriously, Boone," she laughed. "Lighten up a little." She reached over and straightened out his collar anal retentively. "You're cute," she smiled in response to the scowl he shot her. She looked up at him, and placed her hand on his thigh. "I'm glad you came to Prom with me, Boone," she said innocently, biting her lip, and rubbing her hand in a slow circle on his leg.

"I'm glad, too," he tried to act nonchalant, but was having difficulty not reacting to her hands placement and behavior. Boone found himself brushing his arm over her back quickly, and she flashed him a coaxing smile. However, Boone didn't do anything more, simply maintaining his hand at the vicinity of her smooth, tanned back.

"Mm," she closed her eyes. "I'm gonna miss you." Boone pulled her a little closer into an awkward hug, and she leaned against his shoulders, her hand still revolving slightly at his thigh.

"I wish New York would move here so I didn't have to leave," he whispered in her ear.

She smiled, eyes still closed. "Mm," she agreed. "Me too." She leaned back and kissed him on the cheek luxuriously. "Do you wanna go inside, and then, do you wanna dance?" She asked, a little breathless. She stood up. "It's a slow one right now."

"Of course," he said, but he was nervous that wandering eyes would prove to be suspicious. On the other hand, it was just a _dance_, that to onlookers would look platonic. Plus, the room was full of tall blondes, so no one could be sure it was _Shannon_, his sister. She pulled him onto the dance floor, and before long they were wrapped up in each other, as if they were dancing in a tight embrace. She had her cheek against his, and as the song twinkled along, they became more conscious of each other, and the people around them seemed to disappear. He rubbed her back slightly, and she tightened her arms around his neck, and whispered his name in his ear. He shivered, and she pulled back slightly, and looked up at him. He looked back into her bright brown eyes, and before he could think, he moved his face closer to hers, and she tilted her head slightly to the right. They moved their faces closer, until their lips were practically touching… But the trance was quickly broken when they realized what they were doing. "Sorry," he said awkwardly, and Shannon moved her head to his shoulder.

"It's okay," she answered harshly, looking around. "I don't think anyone saw."

"I'm really sorry," he stuttered.

"Shhh," she told him, as the song reached its final notes. They held onto each other until the last note had echoed into silence, revolving in a circle to the rhythm of the song. She finally broke away, but they didn't break eye contact as she moved her arms from around his neck, and he moved his hands from her back. "Thanks," she mouthed, though he wasn't sure what she was referring to. What he was sure of, however, was that he was in _heaven_.

_Please say what you liked and didn't like! The next chapter is the one before he leaves for college, and should be fun. Thanks, and any suggestions are happily accepted! _


	28. Chapter 28

_**Tangled Youth**_

**Chapter 28**

"Honey, what day did you say you were leaving again?" Sabrina asked one morning, fastening the buckle on her briefcase almost violently. It was late August, about four days before Boone was set to leave for New York, and he was currently sitting at the kitchen table, reading the NYU course catalog for about the thousandth time, eating corn flakes. Shannon was at an all day ballet performance workshop.

"Um, Tuesday afternoon."

"Oh _no_," she said distractedly, taking a sip of her freshly squeezed orange juice. "I'm going to be in the wine country until Tuesday morning! Is that okay?" But considering that she was getting ready to leave to get on a plane to Northern California _now_, he didn't have much of a choice. Still, it didn't exactly please him that his mom wouldn't be at home the night before he went to college.

"What about Adam?"

"Oh, right," Sabrina almost knocked over Boone's corn flake box. "He's coming, too. It's so nice up there, and there's this precious Inn we always stay at, and…" Just then, her cell phone started ringing, and she answered. "Hello? Jane? Could you hold on a moment?" She put her hand over the receiver of the flip phone. "Boone, honey, I need to go, but I'll see you in a few days, alright? I can't believe you're going to college!" She gave Boone a quick, half-hearted hug. "_Behave_, alright?"

"Yes, mother," he replied, lacing his tone with sarcasm.

She smiled falsely, and picked up her phone again. "Yes, Jane? Sorry, I had a bit of a distraction… the plans for the Johnson's? Yes, they've raised their budget…" And with that, she slammed the door behind her and was gone.

* * *

It had been Shannon's idea to go out for dinner, just the two of them, the night before he was to leave for NYU. They went to a small Mexican restaurant that Sabrina would dub 'uncivilized', but as long as it was a place where Shannon would be allowed to dine in flip flops and tank top with a bikini underneath, they were happy with it.

In the restaurant, they talked about meaningless nonsense – really ignoring the underlying issue of his impending departure. It was all "_How was your day"_ and "_Guess who's dating who"_ and "_Isn't your mother a bitch_?" Boone wasn't really interested in the vapid content of what she was saying, but he listened intently to her voice, because he wanted to hear as much of it as possible before he left. He watched her facial expressions as she spoke, the way her lips moved and her eyes rolled, trying to memorize every bit of porcelain skin on her face. Even though she would visit, and he would have pictures, he was deathly afraid of forgetting how her face looked.

"So, Boone," she kicked him under the table as he read over the bill, verifying its accuracy. "Guess what I stole from Daddy's closet for the beach?" Shannon and Boone had agreed on taking a trip to the nearby beach after dinner. Both the restaurant and the beach were walking distance, so they hadn't even bothered using the car.

Boone looked up, smiling dubiously. "Something with alcoholic content?" She bit her lip, looking around suspiciously before adjusting the fabric of the tote bag she was carrying to expose the top of a full bottle of tequila. "_Shannon_!" He whispered sharply. "Put it back, someone will see!" Shannon slid it back into the back, grinning flirtatiously and giving his foot another nudge under the table.

"This mean I'm paying for dinner?" He wondered. But Shannon just pouted expectantly, and Boone pulled out some wrinkled bills from his pants pocket, and carefully counted them out, adding a fifteen percent tip, and sorted them compulsively, laying them on the table. Shannon pulled on his arm impatiently, whining at him to hurry up like she was a toddler at a museum. "Hold on, Shannon," he faked annoyance, secretly enjoying her attention.

After making sure the bills were perfectly stacked on the table, he followed her out of the building, eyes on the hem of her tiny denim skirt. They walked to the beach in companionable silence, next to each other, and their hands accidentally brushed against each other as the sun set behind them. When they arrived at the beach, it was completely dark, and they sat down on the warm, grainy sand. Shannon handed Boone the bottle of tequila, motioning for him to open it. He untwisted it with difficulty, and took a tiny sip from it, the drink stinging his throat. Shannon took a long sip unflinchingly. "God, I can't believe this is your last night as a California boy," she took another sip, and passed it back to Boone. Boone gulped down some quickly. She rolled her eyes, taking the bottle from him and swallowing it with such ferocity it dribbled down her chin. Boone blamed it on the miniscule amount of alcohol he had consumed when he scooted close to her to wipe it off with the back of his thumb. She turned her head away from him, but still let him finish, shoving the bottle back towards him.

As they drank, they watched the white capped waves crashing relentlessly against the beach. As time went on, the few people remaining on the beach dissipated, and before long, Shannon and Boone were the only people in site. As the alcohol seeped through his blood, he found it more and more difficult to concentrate on Shannon's words and not on her increasingly luscious looking lips. But thoughts of this being his last time spent with Shannon while actually living in California wove their way deeper into Boone as well, and her mannerisms and gestures became even more precious to him.

"You know I hate you for leaving me," she slurred pleasantly, shakily handing the bottle back to him.

"I couldn't hate you if I tried," he replied blearily, his throat numb to the burn of the tequila in his throat.

"I know," she whispered, her eyes wide and understanding. After another sip, which she slobbered all over her tank top, she started laughing suddenly. "Remember the time when Sabrina and Daddy were gone, and I tried on all her clothes, and she never found out?"

"That was non-sequis… non-sequizz… non-sequitor," he struggled.

"Cuz I'm wasted," she said triumphantly. "You're wasted too."

"Yeah, I guess so." He grinned roguishly, the alcohol in his brain mixing to make him dizzy, giggly, hyper, and extremely horny all at once. Apparently, it has somewhat of a similar effect on Shannon, because before he knew it, she had hopped up, kicking off her sandals, and ran into the ocean surf, pulling off her tank top as she did so.

"Boone," she whined, unnecessarily loudly. "Let's go swimming!"

"I don't have a swimsuit," he stood up shakily, almost tripping.

Flames of mischief twinkled in her brown eyes. "Let's go skinny dipping!" She exclaimed.

"Shan, I don't – " he started, but when he realized she was serious, untying the ties of her bikini that she had been wearing underneath her shirt, he stopped short. "Shannon, stop," he managed, crushing together the n's of her name so it sounded like he was saying, "Shnnn".

"You know you wanna get naked!" She giggled loudly, her swimsuit top still half on (or half-off, depending on how you look at life), approaching him and reaching for the drawstring of his shorts. Her swimsuit was so loose around her chest, he could see the fleshy sides of her breasts.

"I can do it myself," he flinched away, because he knew if he let her take off his shorts for him, he wouldn't be able to control himself from throwing her into the sand and fucking her right there. Shannon shrugged, pulling the rest of the top over her head, shimmying out of her skirt, until she was just standing there in her tiny orange bikini bottoms, her arms crossed over her chest. Boone tried not to let his eyes linger, but it was no use.

"Look who's graduated to boxer briefs from boxers!" She slurred. "Now take them off."

"You first," he whined.

"_You first_," she imitated him. "Oh, fuck you, Boone!"

"I'd like to!" He slurred boldly, not able to control anything coming out of his mouth. Shannon raised her eyebrows, bending over to reach for the bottle, whose contents had been significantly reduced since their arrival at the shore. She took another sip, staring at Boone's bare chest openly. Then she practically threw the bottle at Boone, and he gulped deeply into it, his eyes squeezed shut as he stepped out of his underwear in near fright.

"And I thought you were going to chicken out on me," she struggled to compose an intelligible sentence, and pulled off her bikini bottoms as she jumped into the waves. "Shit, it's all cold!" She screeched. Boone followed her into the surf, disregarding her warning, and splashed the freezing water at her. She laughed spitefully, and did the same to him, but with twice as much vehemence. He paddled closer to her, treading water furiously. "Boone, you can still touch the ground with your feet," she pointed out. Boone blushed, and touched his feet to the sandy, pebbly bottom of the beach.

"You're really dumb, you know that?" She said good-naturedly, standing to her full height as well, so that Boone could see her breasts above the water. "And it's really obvious you're checking me out."

"Cuz you're naked!" He responded furiously.

"So are you," She laughed, her wet hair fanning out over her bare shoulders. "We're so hot, aren't we?"

"Yeah, you're like the sexiest person ever," he said, with so much conviction it made her laugh.

"Thanks," she swam closer to him, and purred in his ear that he wasn't bad looking himself. Then, she pulled away suddenly. "You know what sucks?" she whined, not giving him a chance to respond. "That we're brother and sister! I mean, otherwise I'd totally screw you." She swam even nearer to him.

"Yeah, me too!" He exclaimed. "What a coincilden… coincidilence… coincidence!"

"Yeah," she said awkwardly, looking away. She sighed, and then they were both silent except for the sound of the crashing waves against the sand and her quiet breaths.

"Um," he looked back at her, remembering she was naked and soaking wet. She frowned at him, and he coughed, looking away as well. She cautiously looked up at him, taking his chin in her hand so that he was facing her. Before she could move, she found his lips on hers, kissing her hard and full and unrestrained, and she was kissing him back. Then, their senses caught hold of them, and they both pulled back simultaneously. "Sorry," he bit his lip.

"Let's get out," she said quietly, and he wasn't sure if she was annoyed or not.

"I'm really sorry!" He slurred. Shannon stepped out of the water, taking a towel out of her tote bag and wrapping it around herself.

"Lie down," she said, locating the bottle of tequila and taking a sip.

"What?" He cocked his head in confusion.

"Lie _dowwwwn_!" She practically screamed drunkenly. He followed her orders, lying down in the sand on his back. Bottle in hand, she lay down next to him, spreading out the towel so it covered both of them. She handed the bottle to Boone, and he drank appreciatively, especially after the awkwardness they had just experienced. Shannon put her head against his chest, her warm breasts pressing into his torso, and grabbed the tequila from him, nursing it to her lips as if she were a baby drinking from a bottle.

"Shannon, you think maybe you've had enough?" She shook her head fervently, gulping down even more, and then forced it against Boone's lips. He swallowed reluctantly, pushing her away.

"I'm still mad at you," she whispered, her words barely understandable under a thick slur. "You don't hafta leave me, but you are." He noticed tears formulating in her eyes.

"Shannn – Shannon, it's not about leaving _you_. It's about having a good college esper – experience." He spoke slowly so that he wouldn't mispronounce anything.

"Why can't ya have a good college esper-ance here?" She didn't even try not to slur her words.

"I've lived in California all my life, and I've always wanted to see the East Coast, and I know it'll be hard for you, but it'll be hard for me, too! What am I gonna do without you, Shan? You're my best friend!" He hugged her to his chest, trying to comfort her.

"So are you," she mumbled. "But I guess college is still more important to you."

"No!" He said loudly. "Shannon!" She looked away, but he wrapped his arms around her shoulders, forcing her to make eye contact. "Shannon, please don't think that." _I love you_, he almost said. "It's just for four years, and… I really care about you, _so_ much, and… I was bound to move out at some point! I'm eighteen now, I'm an _adult_." He went around in circles, not making any sense.

"This is our last night together." She said stoically. "This is our last night living together. _Ever_."

"I know, so let's not fight, please?" He begged, whining a little thanks to the alcohol.

"Okay," she said quietly, and put her head back on his chest. "I'm gonna miss you so much, though."

"I know, me too." He felt tears prickling at his eyes. "Shit, you're making me cry!"

"I'm sorry," she murmured, and wiped a tear from his face. Then she giggled a little, and _kissed_ his tears away. "_God_, now you're making _me_ cry again!" She pulled back. "I need more alcohol."

"No, ya don't." He grabbed it from her, and she reached for it.

"Yes, I do!" She screeched. "Give it, Boone!" But she was smiling through her tears, so he pulled it even further from her, putting it on the opposite side of his body. She stretched herself across him, trying to get to it. "_Boone_! You asshole!"

"You've had your share, _Princess_." He sing-songed.

"If I'm Princess, does that make you Prince Charming?" She snickered.

"I dunno," he tried to hold back a laugh. "Does it?" He raised his eyebrows, suddenly realizing that she was laying across him, one of her arms draped over his neck. His judgment level lowered because of the alcohol, he wrapped his arms around her lower waist, tucking her hair behind her ear as he did so. Surprisingly, she was still smiling.

"Yeah, I think it does," she whispered, and kissed a dried up tear off his cheek, then on his neck, then playfully kissing him on the lips.

"Shit," he muttered, deepening the kiss, giving into whatever. He leaned against her, blaming it on the tequila, and sucked on her bottom lip. Her lips were dry from the cold air, but inside, they were sweet and soft. She pressed her tongue against his, moaning into his mouth.

"I'm gonna miss you so much," she mumbled in between kisses.

"Yeah," he kissed her fervidly, "So much…" He ghosted his hand over her breasts, which had reacted to the cold night air. She shivered, grabbing his hand.

"Boone, you don't have to leave… you could just stay and go to UCLA or USC like you were thinking about," she pulled back, her eyes wide and afraid.

"I've already made my decision," he answered apologetically. "But Shannon, I'm not kidding, I'll call you every single day. I absolutely _will_."

"But it's not the same. I don't get to look at you, or touch you, or…" she trailed off, kissing his neck softly. "I just don't know what I'm gonna do without you." She rested on his shoulder. "Let's go home," she breathed in his ear.

"Okay," he agreed, putting his arm around her shoulders and giving her a quick squeeze. Then he stood up, and started putting his clothes back on. She did the same, but didn't bother putting a shirt on over her bikini top. He decided it wouldn't be especially comfortable to put a shirt on, because he was still damp and sticky from the salt water and sand. They walked home shakily, grabbing onto each other for support. By the time they reached the house, they had realized how exhausted they were, and silently took showers. About ten minutes later, Boone was sitting in his bed, clad in only underwear, when she joined him, clean and fresh from her shower, wearing a bathrobe over nothing but a pair of turquoise panties. She took off the bathrobe, and turned around, her back facing him, looking through his now almost-empty dresser for a big t-shirt.

"Third drawer," he said, his voice sounding foreign and far away.

"Thanks," she selected a navy blue t-shirt that Boone hadn't worn since middle school. She looked sadly at the suitcases next to his bed. "I can't believe this is really happening," she climbed into bed, cuddled against him. She buried her head into the crook of his neck, breathing his scent in deeply. He wrapped his bed sheets around them, and turned out the light next to his bed. He hugged her closer upon feeling her silent sobs against him, but didn't try to make any excuses.

"I'm so sorry, Shan," he said.

"It's all going to change between us now. It'll be different," she cried.

He rubbed her back slowly. "Just keep crying, it's good to get it out," he coaxed her. Tears continued to stream down her face, her upset breaths resonating against his chest. Eventually, her breathing began to equalize, quietly lulling Shannon into sleep. "I love you so much," he whispered once he was certain she was asleep. "I'll never stop loving you, Shannon." He looked at the ceiling, unsure of how his future was going to play out. "_Never_." And he kept repeating this to himself, like it was the only thing keeping him sane.

_Okay, I was going to put the part about him actually leaving in this chapter, but I didn't want to rush things, so I guess I'll save that for the next chapter. I hope you guys liked it, because I've been looking forward to writing it for a very long time. In the name of drunk naked Boone, please review! _


	29. Chapter 29

**_Tangled Youth_ **

Chapter 29

When the fingers of dawn crept across Boone's window, the sky's pink-tinged light blinded his eyes, and the golden sun reflected off of Shannon's hair. It was the epitome of a California sunrise, and Boone realized that this was the last morning he would ever wake living with his family in California – his last day living with Shannon.

He looked down at her, blonde hair mussed from sleep, and a slightly perturbed expression on her sleeping face. He knew that Sabrina would be coming home soon, and how suspicious this would look – they would definitely get in trouble. But Boone couldn't bear to wake the innocent looking girl snuggled against him, sound asleep.

Boone tried to picture himself waking up at college. Would he be tired and stressed out after listening to his roommates party all night? Or would he be calm and rested, at peace with himself without his step-sister's constant presence? He suspected it would be a mix of both – but he was worried about leaving Shannon here, and wondered if they would ever be this close again. He didn't know if distance would lessen the constant gnaw of guilt in his stomach that was his love for her. Shannon sighed in her sleep, unaware of how each and every breath affected him. Last night at the beach had been many breaths – interspersed with sips from the tequila bottle, drunken rambling, and sweet kisses on the lips. And he knew that those moments would stay imprinted in his mind for a long time, if not forever. How long, he wondered, was forever?

But thoughts of existentialism wouldn't stop the sun from rising, Sabrina's arrival, or his imminent departure – a decision that now, with the love of his life nestled into him, he was beginning to regret. Leaving California meant leaving lots of things. It meant leaving Shan, but it also meant leaving any possibility of seeing his dad again, or ever establishing a closer relationship with Adam, or a relationship with his mother that was more personal that corporate. It meant being able to shed an image, leaving relationships untied, with a possibility of starting anew, with a new image and new relationships waiting to be instituted. But New York. It was thousands of miles away, a whole new setting – he'd be completely on his own, and there was a definite possibility he was going to screw it all up. All that and a hangover headache.

Boone ran his hand through Shannon's hair, trying to softly coax her awake. She stirred a bit, sighing something incomprehensible. "Shaaaaaannon," he sing-songed, tickling her back, trying to savor his last few moments with her before he was to move away. She wiggled, trying to hold back giggles futilely.

"Boone! _Don't_," she whined. "Stop it!" She laughed. "I mean it," she bit her lip, and Boone pulled his hands back. She settled back against his shoulder, and sighed. "Your mother's going to kill us."

"At least we'll die happy," he joked.

"Speak for yourself, emo kid." She scowled. "How am I going to deal with her without you around to piss her off?"

"I dunno," he said honestly. He was extremely nervous about Sabrina being alone with Shannon – that she might slap her, or make her feel worthless, which might lead her to start throwing up again. "Maybe you can zip yourself into my suitcase and come with me."

"Yeah, and suffocate inside the cargo section. Besides, I've got ballet, and my dad, and Anna to take care of."

"I should probably say goodbye to her, he said absently, still combing his hands through her hair.

"Yeah, probably. Boone?" She sat up a bit.

"Yeah, Shan?"

"Does your, um, does your dad know where you're gonna be?"

Boone raised his eyebrows in surprise. "You think he cares?"

"Well, in case he does, I think you should call him. It wouldn't hurt to leave a message, even if he hasn't made an effort with you. And if you don't, it might be too late." Boone was sure she was referring to Camilla, and how Shannon felt responsible for not being able to save her.

"I guess it wouldn't hurt," he allowed. "I'll call him later. Did you ever tell anyone about when we visited?"

"No, I haven't told any of our secrets." She smiled guiltily.

"Like that club, in Australia," he tried to sound nonchalant.

"That was… interesting," Shannon remembered. "I guess we were pretty desperate."

But Boone had always been desperate, craving any bit of attention from her he could get. He didn't understand why fate had decided to give him such an immense attraction to a girl who was supposed to be his sister, or to fall so hard for her at such a young age. "I guess so," he stuttered. "We were so plastered. I dunno why I decided to go start pounding shots like some frat boy."

"Escape from reality," she mused. "We do weird things when we're drunk, don't we?"

"Yeah," he nudged her, smiling. "Like skinny dipping."

"And making out." She added. "We're one fucked up family."

"That's for damn sure," he said darkly.

"Yeah," she agreed. She closed her eyes, and rested against Boone's bare shoulder. "I can't believe this is the last day you're gonna be here."

"Gonna miss you, Shan," he tucked a piece of hair behind her ear.

"I know. Because you…" She started, her voice barely a whisper. Boone panicked, aware of what words were about to tumble from her mouth.

"I gotta go take a shower," he blurted out, almost running from the room, leaving a surprised and guilty looking Shannon behind him.

* * *

Sabrina arrived about a half hour later, bringing her loud, commanding voice and obeying husband with her. After she arrived, she and Boone went straight to his room to start carrying his bags downstairs. While Boone had been in the shower, Shannon had retreated to her room, planning to leave it about ten minutes after Sabrina's arrival, so it looked as if she was just waking up, and hadn't slept in Boone's bed.

As Boone picked up a black carry-on suitcase, the one that held his t-shirts and sweaters, Shannon emerged from her bedroom, rubbing her eyes convincingly.

"Hi Sabrina," she muttered. Sabrina nodded to acknowledge her existence.

"Shannon, we're a little busy right now, so stay out of the way, alright?" Sabrina looked down at a tote bag, picking it up. "If you need to borrow money, ask your father."

"Mom, leave her alone," Boone said tiredly.

"I was just wondering what time Boone is leaving, because I want to go to the airport with you guys." She stared at Boone, looking pained at Sabrina's comment, beckoning him to defend her further.

"You don't need to – " started Sabrina.

"We're leaving at about one, Shan," Boone interrupted, his voice soothing in order to comfort her.

Sabrina sniffed haughtily, and went towards the door. "Come on Boone, I'm _not_ going to carry all your things downstairs for you."

"Yes, mom," he sighed, and picked up his carry-on and another black bag, following her down the hall, and descending down the steps. Once they got downstairs, they carried the bags outside, and placed them carefully in the trunk of Sabrina's SUV. When Sabrina had purchased the monstrous vehicle, he had protested, but Sabrina wouldn't say no to the trendy, gas-guzzling car.

Afterwards, he decided to walk down the street to say goodbye to Anna. He didn't really want to, but at the same time, he knew that it would be insensitive not to. He had already said goodbye to Kevin a few weeks before, when Kevin had left for his college. Boone walked up the expansive Van Camp driveway, and knocked on the door.

"Hey," she opened the door, and smiled when she saw who it was. "I just woke up," she apologized for her disheveled appearance. Her hair was tangled, and she was wearing a baby blue bathrobe and slippers.

"It's okay," he looked down at her slippers, which were fluffy and pink. Actually, he much preferred her looking this way than all made-up and dressed like a slut.

"Hold on, I'm gonna go put on some clothes," she looked embarrassed.

"It's okay, I've seen you like this." He meant that he had seen her in her pajamas, but it came out with a totally different connotation. "I mean, I don't mind the PJ's."

"Okay... " she looked confused. "So, what brings you here…Oh!" She covered her mouth with her hand in surprise. "You're leaving today!"

"Yeah, going to New York," he smiled briefly.

"Did Shannon make you come say goodbye to me?" Anna put a slight lilt on the word Shannon, as if to say, "I understand how you feel". Or maybe it was just to make him feel guilty.

"No, she suggested it. But I mean, we've known each other for a while, and… you never forget your first, right?" He squinted, trying not to blush.

"Yeah, we had some interesting times," she giggled, blushing a little herself. "Wow, I can't believe you're really leaving."

"Me either. Be good to yourself, okay?" He stepped back.

"I'll do my best, but it might be a little difficult without you keeping me on my toes, won't it?" For some reason this gave him a random burst of warmth towards her. He wrapped her into a warm, friendly hug.

"You're obnoxious," he said affectionately. "But I'm gonna miss you." She hugged back, keeping the gesture platonic.

"See ya, Boone," she pulled back.

"Bye, Anna." He started walking back down the driveway, but she stopped him.

"Wait!" She shuffled outside in her slippers. "Look, you know our relationship ended kind of weird, and… I just… whatever happens, I hope you and Shan are happy. I hope your thing with Shannon settles itself." She said quietly.

"Thanks, Anna." He muttered. "That really means a lot." Which was his excuse for giving her a swift kiss on the lips before he went back home.

* * *

When he got home, he dug the slip of paper with his father's phone number out of his desk, and locked himself in the bathroom, number and cell phone in hand. He would just leave a short, succinct message – Just in case you care, I'm moving to New York for college. If you need to reach me… no, that was stupid. Hi, Dad, this is Boone, your son… that was even worse. Hey, this is Boone Carlyle, your son, and I just wanted to let you know that if you want to reach me, I'll be at New York University… yes, that would do. He dialed his father's digits slowly, each beep that sounded as he pressed the numbers representing the degree of his nervousness. Luckily, as he had expected, the phone went straight to answering machine.

"Hello, you've reached the home of Frank and Louise Shep –" said the message. Boone hung up, discouraged. His father had moved, and changed his number! He turned off his phone, halting the possibility of ever having a relationship with the man who shared half of his genes. Boone put his head in his hands, letting emotions that he had been holding back flow out of him, tears running down his cheeks. Not only was all hope in ever speaking to Sam Carlyle completely lost, but his life was about to completely change.

Today was the day he truly became an adult. Today was the day when he would leave Shannon forever… and today, he thought, getting a hold on himself, and wiping his eyes dry, _today,_ the moment he stepped on the plane to New York, he was going to stop feeling like he felt about Shannon. As an adult, he would have to take responsibility for his actions, he had to grow out of his feelings for Shan, finally, and move on and have a normal relationship with her. Boone stood up, as he had been sitting on the closed toilet seat, putting his phone in his pocket, and opened the door to the bathroom.

"Jesus Christ," Shannon had been standing directly outside the door, dressed in a skirt and a tank top, hair neatly brushed at her shoulders. "Was that like the momentous last masturbation or something?"

"Shut up, Shannon," he shrugged past her. She smiled evilly. "Seriously, Shannon, that's not what I was doing."

"Uh-huh," she sing-songed disbelievingly.

"Seriously, Shan," he stood closer to her, and his voice low, said to her, "I was trying to call my dad."

"In the bathroom?" She wrinkled her forehead. "While masturbating?" She played stupid, and it was obvious, as a smile teased at her lips.

"Don't play dumb," he laughed good-naturedly. "And, just so you know, he's moved. He doesn't have the same number anymore."

"Fucking bloody piece of scum," Shannon shook her head. "I know I've said this, but you really don't deserve that. Not at all."

"Thanks, Shan," he looked at her feet, trying to avoid her toxic gaze.

"Sabrina says we're leaving now," she murmured. "Better say goodbye to my dad."

"Yeah," a twinge of guilt gnawed at his insides. He couldn't believe he had forgotten to say goodbye to his own stepfather! "Where is –" But, his question was answered when he turned around to see Adam standing right there.

"I'll wait in the car," Shannon said quickly, scampering off.

"Bye, Adam," Boone said said, and pulled Adam into an awkward hug.

"Goodbye, Boone. I really hope it goes well," he said genuinely, pulling back.

"Thank you."

"It's too bad we never really had a relationship." _Yes,_ thought Boone, _especially now since the possibility of a relationship with my real father is out._

"It is," he agreed. "But it's not too late yet!"

"I guess not," but Adam sounded doubtful, even ineffectual. "Well, I'm not the best at goodbyes…"

"Okay," Boone smiled. "Well, see you."

"Yeah, next time you come home for a holiday, I suppose." Adam gave him a final nod, and retreated into his office.

On the way to the airport, Sabrina, Shannon, and Boone were all silent, Shannon pressed into Boone's shoulder, their hands clenched together, not breaking their contact during the entire ride. He could tell that Sabrina didn't appreciate the touching, but surprisingly, it didn't bother him very much.

Once they arrived, they checked Boone in, and followed him up to the security section of the airport. "Well," Sabrina said briskly. "They won't allow us past this point."

"No, they won't," Boone answered, suddenly feeling extremely introspective.

"Boone," Sabrina said, and Boone thought he was going to be chastised, but instead, he found himself being hugged for the fourth time that day. "I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"I'm just sorry," she squeezed him harder. "You've been a good kid. I haven't given you enough credit for that. And, I hope everything goes well. I love you." The whole statement sounded clichéd and insincere, but he let her hug him anyway.

"Me too, Mom," he replied. But the moment was broken when Sabrina's cell phone went off.

"I need to get this," she pulled back, affirming the insincerity Boone had suspected. "Hold on."

"Fucking bitch," he thought he heard Shannon mutter under her breath. Sabrina turned away, so Boone took this opportunity to say goodbye to Shannon.

"Shan," he wrapped his arms around her lower torso, holding her close. She did the same, placing her arms around his neck.

"It's all going to change now," she whispered in his ear. "God, what the hell am I gonna do?" Tears started running down her cheeks.

"We'll still talk," he answered, but his voice cracked as well. "It's not like I'm dying or something. Well, not anytime soon," he joked.

"Not funny," she murmured. Suddenly, she pulled back, and dragged Boone behind a phone booth box where Sabrina couldn't see. As soon as Boone figured out what was happening, and before he could think, he leaned Shannon back against the wall of the phone booth, and kissed her, pressing his lips into hers for a full five seconds. No tongue, but their attraction was magnetic and obvious, just like it always was. "Shit," she giggled behind her tears. "That was bad."

"We _so_ shouldn't have done that," he laughed back. "But that doesn't mean I didn't enjoy it." She laughed.

"We better get back before she notices and calls security."

"True," he agreed, and they went back around to where Sabrina could see them. Sabrina said something into her phone, and held it to her side.

"Bye Boone! You'll miss your flight."

"Okay," he said ambivalently.

"Call the moment you get there!" Sabrina warned.

"Boone," Shannon pouted.

"I know, Shan," he circled his arms around her again, falling into her embrace again.

"I love you, Boone. You're my big brother and you're my best friend," she affirmed, and her words filled Boone with a feeling he couldn't explain.

"I love you, too." He said, finally pulling back. "I gotta go."

"Bye," she whimpered meekly.

"Bye, Boone!" Sabrina called again, covering the receiver of her phone with her hand. Boone rolled his eyes, but they were filled with silent tears. And with that, he went to stand in the security line, staring back at Shannon until she was out of his sight.

As he stepped on the plane about a half hour later, he realized, with a shock, that his life would never be the same again. _Goodbye childhood, hello college_, he thought.

* * *

_Sorry the update took so long! Thanks for reading, and please review! Also, any suggestions for things you would like to see happen to Boone at college are much appreciated. _


	30. Chapter 30

**_Tangled Youth_**

**Chapter 30 **

Boone was surprised how quickly the five hour plane ride to New York passed. Throughout the entire trip, his mind swam with thoughts, about what was to come in his life, and what had already occurred in his life. By the time he got off, he was gnawed with a feeling other than anticipation—he realized that he already missed Shannon.

But he couldn't let thoughts of his sister plague him for long, because there were other more important things to think about. First of all, he was in a city that he had merely vacationed in before, that now was the place he was going to call home. After he collected his bags at baggage claim, he went outside of the gigantic JFK airport, and scanned the strip of parking lot for a vacant taxi. He finally found a cab, where a surly older man greeted him with a brusque, "Where to?" But Boone would have to get used to the way New Yorkers spoke, as it was his new home.

Boone was well-aware that he would be spending the next four years here, but the thought still hadn't quite processed into his brain. A part of his brain knew that he was here to stay, but another part was already planning what he would do when he got home. He suspected that this new place would feel more real once he settled into his dorm, met some new people in the same situation as himself, and was bombarded with loads of school work.

"NYU," Boone said, his voice foreign and far away.

"You a student?" The cab driver asked gruffly.

"Yeah," Boone answered. He wasn't a rich little LA boy anymore, now he would have to adopt the new title of _college student_. "I'm a freshman. Orientation is tomorrow."

"I see," said the driver uninterestedly. "Where you from?" His accent was heavy, and the cab reeked of stale coffee, the unofficial smell of New York City.

"LA," he replied. "California."

"What part? My sister-in-law lived down there." The cab finally reached the airport's exit, and the scent of exhaust and gas became more pungent as the sounds of the city became louder. Boone knew that this wasn't Manhattan, where NYU was actually located, but he still couldn't help being disappointed by his surroundings – a rundown area of Queens.

"Malibu?" He answered tentatively. He was well-aware of people's preconceptions of the area.

"Malibu, huh?" He barked. "My sister-in-law is in the actual city, you probably aren't very familiar with it." His voice was laden with disdain.

"I've been," he said coolly. Boone shifted in his seat, pulling a packet of papers out of his carry-on, the informational packet about what he was to do when he arrived at "home". First, he was supposed to check in with the RA in his dorm area, and then report to his assigned dorm. He had signed up for a suite, which he would share with four other people. Sabrina thought this was a good idea because he wouldn't have to deal with the crazy double-loaded corridor dorm life, but he also wouldn't be socially isolated. And for once, Boone agreed with his mother.

Boone was exceedingly nervous to meet his dorm mates. He knew that he was pretty easy to get along with, but people on the East Coast were different from people on the West Coast. They might not appreciate his easy-going attitude, and shun him from the group. He wondered if his fellow students would be loud and crass, or quiet and well-mannered.

Change was something that was difficult for Boone to accept, though, and for a moment, he longed again for the stability of his life in California – he hadn't had many friends, but he had been okay, and Shannon had been there for him to talk to, touch (if she let him), and dream about.

He pulled his cell phone out of his pocket, and speed-dialed Shannon's cell number. She picked up on the fourth ring, finally. "Hello?" The sound of her voice filled Boone with a sweet, shivery feeling in his stomach.

"Hey, it's me," he smiled.

"Hey, Me," she replied, the smirk evident in her voice. "Where are you?"

"I'm in a taxi, driving through Queens."

"Ew," she said. "Queens is gross."

"Have you ever even been?"

"Remember when we visited New York when I was eleven, and you were thirteen?" She asked.

"How could I forget? You nearly threw up went we went up to the top of the Empire State building, you were so scared of heights. I had to take you inside the building to comfort you."

"If _I_ remember correctly, it was you that was scared."

"You don't remember correctly, then," he said stubbornly.

There was a pause. "I miss you already, Boone."

"I know, I miss you too."

"You miss Sabrina?" She mocked.

"No, but don't tell her that."

"I'll tell her that you won't be able to sleep without her there to tuck you in and kiss you goodnight." Shannon said sarcastically.

"Good girl," he chuckled. "So what are you doing?"

"I just got back from a rehearsal… I have a pretty big solo in our next ballet performance."

"When is it?"

"October," she said coldly. "You won't be able to make it."

"I wish I could," he said earnestly.

"Yeah, well," she replied, "Whatever."

"Oh my god," Boone suddenly remember, looking at the fading gray upholstery on the seat of the cab. "Remember what we did in that taxi in Australia?"

"Boone," she laughed. "What ever happened to the vow of silence?"

"What vow?" He played dumb. "I can't remember a vow."

"You're such an ass, Boone."

"You love it," he teased with the idea of flirting with her.

"Mmmmhmm," she agreed. "Well, I should get going…"

"I love you," he blurted out.

"I love you, too. Bye, Boone."

"Bye, Shan." He held the phone to his ear for a few lingering moments, just feeling her on the line, before hanging up.

"Long distance girlfriend?" The taxi driver asked.

"Um," he considered correcting the man, but, remembering some of the things he had said, he decided to leave it be. "Yeah." Boone looked out the window, observing tall buildings, billboards, busy people walking briskly down the streets. It wasn't _that_ much different from LA – just grayer, older, and dirtier, he decided.

"We're now in Manhattan," the driver said. "We crossed the bridge while you were on the phone."

"Oh, okay," Boone replied, and watched the variety of buildings and people outside until he was dizzy from it all, and the cab slowed to a stop in the front of NYU. Boone perused the map of the school that his information packet contained, noticing that his dorm was on the other side of campus. "Actually, my dorm is on 33 Washington Square West," he read off the paper. After the driver had gotten to the appropriate building, Boone paid and thanked him, and stood outside of his new home.

Boone checked in with the RA on the second floor – an average looking, bespectacled girl, with a bit of a New Jersey accent, who had rattled off a list of rules and given him a key.

Boone turned the key into the door of his dorm tentatively. He couldn't hear if there were people inside, but either way, he was still nervous. He had some idea what to expect – a plain, but clean room with a bed in it, along with a dresser and desk, but he had no idea what to expect from his roommates.

"Someone's coming," he heard a voice inside say, so he quickly put the key back into his pocket and knocked.

A petite girl with a black and white striped sweater and wavy brown hair answered the door. She looked at Boone appraisingly. "You must be Mr. California," she noted.

"How'd you know?" Boone asked, not sure what to make of this girl yet.

"Didn't you get the page that said who your other roommates were?" She asked.

"I guess not. So, um, do you have a name?" Boone wasn't sure if this was a good start or not.

"Yes," she said shortly. "And your name is Boone. Boone Carlyle. Are you related to the wedding dress – "

"She's my mom."

"Ouch," said the girl, still not saying her name.

"Yeah… so, what's your name?"

A tall Asian guy suddenly appeared behind her. "I couldn't get it out of her for an hour," he laughed easily. Boone instantly liked this guy – he was instantly less nervous about the whole situation. "I'm Ben," he reached out his hand to shake Boone's.

"Boone," he introduced.

"Ah, the California boy! Right, Lilly?" Ben said. Lilly scowled. "Woops, let your name slip, did I?" He smiled teasingly at her.

"I'm Lilly," said Lilly reluctantly, shaking Boone's hand, and Boone remembered that his father's niece was called Lilly. "So, where's the surfboard? Bimbo girlfriend?" She craned her neck towards the door, as if looking for something.

"Where's the kawfee?" He imitated the way that New Yorkers pronounced 'coffee'. "Where's the brash, affected attitude?" He asked, and Lilly rolled her eyes. "Oh wait, there it is."

"Aren't you charming." She responded flatly. "I'm gonna go set up some stuff in my room." And with that, Lilly excused herself.

"She likes you," said Ben earnestly after she had departed. "She just puts on an act. She was like that when I first got here too. But she warms up fast. Pretty soon she'll be eating from your breakfast plate and wearing your clothes." Boone shuddered. "Not to scare you."

"I'm not scared," he lied, still confused about the nature of this Lilly person. "So, where are you from? When did you get in?"

"I've lived in Manhattan almost my whole life. I got here early this morning."

"I see," said Boone. "I live in Malibu, California. I'm so lost here, I have no idea where _anything_ is."

"Well I can help show you around. I know the campus pretty well, too. My older sister goes here."

"Oh, really? Any other siblings?" He relished the opportunity to bring up Shannon.

"I have a younger brother. He's a pain in the ass, fifteen."

"Well most fifteen year olds are," Boone agreed. "I have a little sister. Shannon - she's seventeen. She wasn't very happy when she found out I was moving across the country."

"My brother would've been," Ben raised his eyebrows. "But I guess that's a pretty huge adjustment. Brave of you, though."

"Thanks. My mom was all to eager to get rid of me."

"Oh… wait, is your mom _the_ Sabrina Carlyle?" Ben asked, and Boone sighed, knowing that he'd been receiving this question often.

"Yup. Wedding designer extraordinaire." He rolled his eyes.

"Fun. What does your dad do?" Boone froze.

"My step-dad is a lawyer." He avoided that actual question, but there was an honesty in Ben's eyes that made Boone want to tell the whole truth. "My dad… he was a professor, I have no idea what he is now. Let's just say we don't have much of a relationship."

"That sucks, man," Ben said casually, not judging.

"I don't know my way around this place at all," Boone changed the subject. "What time is orientation tomorrow?"

"Nine," Ben answered.

"Do you know how many more roommates we're supposed to get?"

"I think," Ben started. "Two more." He unfolded a sheet of paper from his pocket. "Didn't you get one of these? It's the contact information for the other people assigned to this dorm."

"Nope," Boone shrugged. "Wait, there's only five, but there are three rooms."

"Right, so one person gets their own room. I don't really care too much, you want to share a room with me?"

"Sounds good," he made a mental note to move his things into the room where Ben had placed his things later. Boone and Ben continued talking for a while, and, as Ben had predicted, Lilly started warming up to Boone more, shooting lots of playful insults his way.

* * *

A little later, there was a knock on the door. Boone was the first to answer it, and in front of him stood a tall guy with shaggy hair and a black band t-shirt. "Hey," the guy said, his voice gravely. "I'm Ted, who're you?"

"I'm Boone," Boone answered. "And this is – "

"Ben," Ben reached out to shake Ted's hand.

"Do you think you're hardcore because you're wearing a Nirvana shirt?" Lilly asked Ted harshly. Ted looked down at her.

"Well aren't you little Miss Feisty?" He asked. "It's good to meet you too – "

"Lilly," Boone and Ben said in unison.

"Well, Lilly, I don't think I'm hardcore because I'm wearing a Nirvana shirt. Do you think you're hardcore because you're wearing black?"

"No," she blushed, scowling simultaneously, as if to ward the embarrassment off of her face.

"Next time I wear a shirt with a band on it, I'll remember to get your approval."

"Whatever," she rolled her eyes, but was smiling.

"You look like you could loosen up. Actually, you all do. Want to go out for a beer or something?"

"I don't really want to get kicked out of school before it starts," Lilly responded.

"I'm in," Ben shrugged.

"I don't want the other roommate to come to an empty dorm," Boone excused himself, a little wary of this new character.

"Sure, whatever," Ted shrugged. "Let me just put my stuff in a room."

"There's only going to be five of us, and the other one is a girl, so you can have your own room," Boone said, hoping this was okay with his new roommates. But he had a feeling that Ted might prove to be a little… difficult.

"Thanks man," Ted squeezed past Boone to the bedroom behind him. Lilly squinted at him.

After Ben and Ted left, it was just Lilly and Boone alone in the room. Boone sat on the couch, and Lilly, surprisingly, followed suit. "So…" Boone started. "Tell me a little about yourself?" He was terrible at subtle small-talk, so he decided to just jump in.

"What is this, a job interview?" She wrinkled her nose. "Fine. My name's Lilly, I'm eighteen, and I've lived in New York since high school. I'm here for art."

"Got any siblings?" He once again tried to drop Shannon into the conversation.

"I have an older brother and sister. Twins, but complete opposites. My sister is basically a Barbie, and my brother couldn't be further from it. You have any siblings?"

"I have a sister, stepsister actually. She's seventeen. She's a ballet dancer."

"I used to dance…" She smiled briefly, making Boone to think that maybe there was more to the story.

"Oh. You play any sports?"

"No. Let me guess – you surf." She rolled her eyes ironically.

"Not really." He had tried, a few times, but hadn't experienced much knack for the sport.

"That's not very California of you."

"I'm not as California as you think," he pointed out.

"Tennis?" She ignored him.

"A little," he admitted.

"Yeah, you're pretty damn California." Lilly had settled into the couch, and he appreciated how even though she was sitting pretty close, he felt absolutely no sexual tension whatsoever.

"You've got something on your cheek," He suddenly noticed.

"Here?" She motioned to her jaw area.

"No, higher," but Lilly didn't seem to be taking a hint, so he started to reach over to brush it off for her.

"Are you flirting with me?" She asked when he touched her face.

"No, you're not my type." He said quickly. Lilly seemed like a girl who could handle frankness.

"What's your type?" She didn't quite pull away, instead she leaned into his hand on her face.

"I like blondes," he smiled, playing along, but then snatched his hand away quickly, just to tease her. She laughed.

"Figures," she giggled. "California boy," she whispered, to bother him. Just then, the phone, which was on the table next to them, rang. "I'll get it," she reached over him to answer the phone. "Hello?" She said. "Yeah… yeah… okay… see you."

"Who was that?" Boone asked sleepily, pleased with how well he was getting with his roommates – well, Ben and Lilly anyway.

"That was Rebecca, our other roommate. Her flight was delayed, she won't be in until very late tonight."

"Oh, okay. How does she sound?"

"How the hell should I know?" She snapped, but Boone was already used to her harsh way of speaking. It reminded him of Anna.

"I dunno," he yawned, suddenly realizing how tired he was. Just then, they heard the sound of a key turning in the lock.

"Damn, they knew my fake ID was fake," He heard Ted saying. "Shit." Boone smiled at Lilly in amusement.

"Hello, boys," Lilly smiled smugly. "Have fun, I presume?"

"Loads," Ted rolled his eyes. "I'm going to bed."

"Yeah, me too." Boone decided. "I've had a long day. 'Night Ben. Goodnight Lilly."

"'Night, Boone." Lilly said, and Ben said something of similar nature. After brushing his teeth and getting ready for bed, Boone put the sheets he had packed onto the extra long twin bed in his and Ben's room. He would unpack the rest of his things tomorrow, he decided.

Boone finally fell asleep, content with how well the day had gone, but still uncomfortable with his new surroundings. Maybe tomorrow this whole experience would seem less surreal.

_Sorry it took so long to update, my muse kind of went away for a few weeks. Luckily, I'm now back to living vicariously through people, so you can expect quicker updates than they've been lately. I hope you enjoyed it, I'm a bit nervous about the new characters. Please review, and specifics always help. Thanks!_


	31. Chapter 31

_**Tangled Youth**_

**Chapter 31**

Boone awoke early the next morning after a not-so pleasant sleep on his new dorm room mattress, which was both too hard and too soft at the same time. But this was a minor adjustment to get used to compared to the fact that he was now living with a bunch of people he barely knew, was in a city he had no idea how to get around, and attending a whole new school.

He was the first one awake, luckily, so he took the chance to monopolize the shower before any of his roommates got there. The moment he looked at the shower, he was extremely glad that he had remembered to bring flip flops. The lock on the bathroom refused to lock, so he just shut it very tightly and prayed that no one would come in. After taking a hasty shower, he put on a t-shirt and jeans.

Lilly greeted him when he stepped outside of the bathroom, clad in a long gray bathrobe and pajamas. "Hey," she smiled, as if she had known him her whole life. "Coffee?" She offered him a cup of steaming coffee in a blue mug. "My parents got me a coffee machine as my going away present." Boone took a tentative sip of the coffee, and tried to smile, although it was the most vile tasting, bitter coffee he had ever tasted.

"It's…" he tried, but he knew his expression was close to a grimace. "It's good." Suddenly his voice sounded like that of a 10 year old boy. A few moments later, Ted emerged from his bedroom, wearing boxers, and his hair messily covering his eyes, and accepted the coffee that Lilly offered him as well.

"Holy shit, this is terrible," he said frankly.

But Lilly wasn't insulted. "Are you one of those people who never wash or brush their hair because they think it's a homage to their inner suffering?"

"What's this about inner suffering?" Ben had emerged to hear the tail end of Lilly's remark. "I think it's called before 8 AM on a Monday." Boone chuckled.

"So whose ready for the cafeteria?" Ben asked. "Everyone got your food cards ready?"

"Yeah," Boone agreed, but then remembered something. "Wait… did that new girl come in last night?"

"Oh, yeah," Ben wondered. "I wonder where she is."

"Oh, she showed up last night, I think she' still asleep," Lilly said nonchalantly.

"Wait… she's staying in your room with you and you haven't spoken to her yet?" Boone raised his eyebrows.

"She came in at like 3 AM, and I was like half asleep, and I wasn't going to wake her up."

"Well if we don't, she's going to miss orientation," Boone said, concerned.

"Why don't you just go wake he up, then?" Ted said coolly. "I'm going to head over to the cafeteria."

"I'm not quite ready yet, actually," Lilly said. "So I guess you can go ahead."

"I'm gonna stay here a little while, too," Ben agreed. So Ted left the dorm room alone.

Boone cautiously made his way towards the door to Rebecca and Lilly's bedroom. "What did you say her name was again?" He asked.

"Rebecca," Lilly replied, making her way towards the bathroom.

Boone knocked on the door twice, and waited. No answer. "Rebecca?" He said. "Rebecca?"

"Hold on a second!" Answered a muffled voice. About thirty seconds later, a girl wearing jeans and a plain sweater opened the door. She had glasses, frizzy blondish hair, and wasn't wearing any makeup. "Hi," she said meekly.

"Hi, I'm Boone." He held out his hand to shake her hand, and tried not to judge her by her appearance.

"I'm Becky," she replied nervously. That was when Boone remembered how his looks sometimes intimidated people.

"Sorry to wake you up, but I was afraid you would miss orientation, which starts in less than an hour."

"Oh, thank you. I must have forgotten to set my alarm, I didn't get in until 3 AM."

"You're welcome. So…"

"So," she squeaked. "I guess I'd better finish getting ready."

"Okay," he smiled. Becky gaped at him. "See you."

"Yeah, see you," she said.

"Boone!" Lilly yelled from the bathroom. "Would you get your razor off of the damn counter?" Ah, the joys of college dorm life, Boone thought.

* * *

Orientation was overwhelming, to say the least. First, the entire freshman class sat in a huge auditorium, where the president of the school gave a speech. Boone was going to take notes, but then he got some weird looks when he took out a pen, so he decided against it. The dean welcomed them, and then rattled off a bunch of rules, and told them that class sign ups would start that evening. Boone wasn't sure which classes to take yet, so he would have to think about that further.

When he got out of the auditorium later, he went back to the dorm and checked his messages on his cell phone, noticing that he had one missed call from Shannon. He called her back, anticipating hearing her voice. His decision to stop being in love with her had definitely been futile, as he had already completely forgotten about it. "Hey, Shan," he said warmly. "What's up?"

"Boone!" She exclaimed. "Hey! How's college life?"

He tried not to overanalyze the fact that she was excited to talk to him. "Pretty good, thanks. It's overwhelming, though. I have no idea what classes to take."

"How are your roommates?" She didn't want to talk about academic plans.

"They're pretty good. There's this one guy, Ben, who's really cool – "

"Is he hot?" Shannon interrupted.

"Shannon!" He reprimanded. "And then there's this girl named Lilly who's really snarky like you – "

"Answer me, is Ben hot?"

"I don't _know_! And then there's this other guy named Ted, who is… well, I don't really think we exactly complement each other."

"You hate him," she interrupted him yet again.

"I don't really know him enough to hate him, Shan."

"You know I love it when you call me that," he could hear the smile in her voice.

"Um, thanks?" He tried to be nonchalant.

"No one else calls me that, but you always shorten everyone's names. It's sweet."

"Thanks."

"I miss you," she said weakly.

"I know Shan, me too. You should come visit soon."

"Yeah, maybe during Thanksgiving break. But I want to see you now, you know?"

"Yes," he replied shortly. He was clenching onto the receiver of the phone, wishing that the plastic of the phone would somehow turn into her.

"I can't like, touch you over the phone. I can't look at you."

"It sucks," he answered. There was a pause.

"I love you," she finally said. "Oh, wait, hold on, Sabrina wants to talk to you."

"Okay," he replied, worried about what his mom had to say.

"Boone!" His mom said harshly as soon as he answered. "_Don't_ sign up for classes until you've approved them with me!"

"Oh, thanks, I'm good. How are you?" He asked smugly.

"Very funny, Boone. Now seriously, what classes are you considering?"

"I dunno, I was thinking like calculus and some science class and some English or Humanities class."

"That's very vague, Boone. Any further ideas?" She asked coolly.

"Well, I'll just take Freshman English, and Calculus II, and…"

"I think you should take a business class," she interrupted.

"_Mom_," he argued.

"Look Boone, who's paying your bills? I want you to sign up for a business class, alright?"

"Fine," he agreed.

"So, what else?"

"Look Mom," he said, frustrated. "I am eighteen years old, I think I can figure it out by myself!"

"Boone, I'm only trying to help you find what's in your best interest."

"Oh, since when have you cared about what's in my best interest? You didn't even ask me how I was, how I'm settling in, nothing like that, you just want me to take classes that'll _look_ good." He knew he was being nasty, but she had provoked him.

"I have work to do." She ignored all of his accusations. "Goodbye."

"Um, bye?" He hung up, confused. But he didn't have time to think about what Sabrina had said, because just then, Ben, Ted, and Lilly appeared in the room, whispering and talking to each other in hushed voices.

"Hey, California Boy!" Lilly exclaimed. "We just picked up some pizza, hope you like Pepperoni," she approached him, holding two boxes of pizza.

"Look at what we scored," Ben held up a bottle of Jack Daniel's. Boone gaped.

"How'd you… we… what?" He tried to create an intelligible sentence.

"We decided to play some getting to know you games," Ted smirked.

"Wow, okay," Boone smiled. _This _was going to be fun. "Where's Becky?"

"Oh, we already asked her, she didn't wanna play," Ben shrugged.

"Really?" He wasn't surprised, but he was a little disappointed, because Becky seemed lonely. "Come on, we should convince her to."

"I'll go ask her again…" Lilly said, and disappeared into her room.

"So, what kinds of getting to know you games did you have in mind?" Boone wondered.

"I Never, Truth or Dare, that kind of thing?" Ben answered.

Just then, Lilly appeared. "Well, I got her to come play. Come on boys, let's sit." She sat down near the couch, on the floor, and Becky cautiously sat next to her. Boone didn't know what had been on this floor, but no one else seemed to care, so he sat down as well.

Soon, they were lounging around on the floor, eating pizza on paper towels. Ben was reclined against the front of the couch, Ted against the wall. Lilly was sitting cross-legged in between Boone and Ben, her weight shifted towards Ben. Becky was sitting on the couch uncomfortably, looking like a dear caught in headlights. "So, whose gonna start?" Boone asked.

"I will," Ben said. "I'll start with something boring. Um, I've never been to Australia." Boone reached over towards the bottle, opened it, and filled his cup, taking a small sip.

"I went last summer with my family," he explained. "Uh, do I go next?"

"Yeah," Lilly said.

"Okay. I've never… I've never smoked pot." Ted quickly downed his cup, as did Ben, and even Lilly took a tentative sip. "Wow, you guys are all druggies," he joked.

"No, you're just a goody-goody," said Ted. "Can I go next? I've never kissed a guy."

Lilly drank, and they all looked over at Becky expectantly. She squinted, lifted the cup to her lips, and quickly pulled it away. "You didn't even drink!" Lilly accused.

"Yeah I did," Becky said meekly. "I guess I'll go now. I've never… you know… I've never…"

"She's never fucked someone," Ted finished. They all drank, except Becky. "I think we're gonna need explanations for this one."

"Oh, stories!" Lilly squealed. "Um, it was last summer, actually, I had this boyfriend named Dan, and he was nice and stuff, but then we broke up."

Ted yawned exaggeratedly. "Boo-ring," he said. "I was sixteen, and it was this really hot girl, and I lied about my age – I think she might have been like twenty-something." Boone grimaced. "Oh shut up, California. What's your story?"

"Her name was Anna – "

"She hot?" Ted interrupted.

"Extremely," Boone answered, lackluster. "Kind of annoying though. All loud and clingy."

"Well was she good in the sack?" Ted was just the king of classiness, wasn't he?

"Yeah, I guess. She was my sister's best friend."

"That's awkward. Is your sister hot?" Ted asked, interested.

"Yeah," he blurted out. "I mean, sure, I guess," he tried to retract his previous enthusiasm.

"Ew, you think your sister's hot," Lilly laughed. "Boys will be boys."

"My turn," Ben interrupted. "Okay, I've never gotten a blowjob." Boone drank appreciatively, remembering the time when Anna had gotten a little overzealous. Ted also drank.

"What if you've given one?" Lilly asked, but didn't wait for a response, just drank anyway.

"Can we play something else?" Becky complained.

"You know, I think I like Truth or Dare better, too" Boone said, defending her. "Can we do that instead?"

"I guess," Ted shrugged. Becky looked relieved. "But then how are we gonna drink?"

"I'm sure we'll find a way," Lilly said, and took a sip of her drink, peeling off her second cup. "Mm, I'm starting to feel it." She refilled her glass.

"Let's play it so that we all have to answer it," Ben suggested.

"Okay," they agreed. Lilly finished her third shot, and giggled, inching closer to Boone. "Lilly, you may want to slow down with that," he warned.

"I think you should hurry up with yours, Boone," she smiled. He finished his and filled another. "Becky, my question is just for girls. Who do you think is the hottest guy in here?"

"Oh, this is embarrassing," she laughed uneasily. "Do I have to – "

"Just spit it out," Lilly told her.

"Well, okay, I guess Boone."

"Way to be predictable," Ted scoffed.

"Hey, Boone can't help being sexy, can he?" Lilly said. "You're so gorgeous Boone, you know that right?"

"Um," he took a sip of his drink in response.

* * *

About an hour later, the bottle's contents had lessened significantly, and what they were saying was becoming a lot less guarded. Ben, Lilly, and Boone were extremely tipsy, but Becky had retired to her room after only one shot, and Ted was remarkably good at holding his drink. But for the most part, they were all so drunk that they were leaving out the "truths" and "dares" and just saying and doing whatever they felt like.

"Hey, Lil?" Ben said. He was currently lying on the floor on his back.

"Yeah?" She didn't even notice the nickname that she had been christened.

"Wanna make out?" Ben asked

"Yeaaaah, okay," she giggled, and placed a sloppy kiss on his cheek.

Ben sat up and wiped the slobber off of his face. "Gross, maybe we should hold off," he muttered.

"You can make out with _me_, Lilly," Ted said. He was the only one still sitting up.

"Alright," she crawled towards him, and sat in his lap, and turned around and kissed him, full-on.

"God, get a room," Boone blurted out. "Ewwwww."

"Yeah, get away from me, slut," Ted joked, pushing her away.

"Boone!" She exclaimed, leaning against the couch.

"What?" He responded.

"Defend me, he called me a slut!"

"You _are_ a slut," he said lazily. This resulted in him being slapped. "Okay, okay, you're not a slut."

"I've got a question," Ben interrupted. "What's the grossest thing you've ever done?"

Ted laughed. "I don't think you want to know."

"Yeah, we do," Lilly exclaimed, practically vibrating with excitement. "We do, we do, we do!" Then, splat, she fell on the floor. "Ow, shit."

"Girl, you can _not_ hold your liquor," Ben laughed at her.

"Shut up," she pouted.

"Okay, once I got really drunk, and I was… um…" Ted hesitated. "You know, I was… jerking off, and then I…" Lilly grimaced. Boone wondered in fear how this statement would end. "I puked and I came at the same time."

"Shit, man, that's _sick_!" Ben yelled.

"Seriously, that's twisted," Boone tried to laugh, but was too grossed out. Lilly was speechless for once, her mouth wide open in shock.

"Well, what's yours?" Ted was unfazed.

"Uh," Boone answered, sounding stupid. "Once my sister gave me a hand job." Ben choked. Lilly's eyes widened even more. She had yet to recover from what Ted had said.

"Like, on purpose?" She squeaked.

"Wait, that's cheating," Ted said over her. "That's not something _you_ did."

"Actually, it kind of is. Because I was feeling her up at the same time." He was seriously drunk, otherwise he wouldn't be telling them this.

"_Dude_!" Ben cried. "What's the matter with you?"

"Wait, you were feeling her up at the _same time_ as she gave you a hand job? Woah, you must have excellent concentration skills," Ted sounded impressed.

"What's _wrong_ with you?" Ben repeated.

"We were pretty wasted. So, Lilly, what's your dirty dark secret?" He turned the attention to her. Lilly looked at him, looking woozy, and suddenly threw up. "Oh shit," he swore, and picked her up, dragging her towards the bathroom. She knelt down in front of the toilet, and he held her hair back for her. He turned away, not wanting to watch her.

"I wannnt my mommmmm," she cried, turning to him when she was done.

"Um," he said uncomfortably. Luckily, just then, Ben appeared in the doorway.

"Do you want me to take over?" He asked, and Boone agreed appreciatively. He stood up, and started making his way back to the living room. He could hear Ben telling Lilly, "It's okay sweetie, just calm down. You're just a little drunk. Sssssh." Suddenly, he felt a gnawing pain in his stomach, realizing how much he missed Shannon.

He went back to the living room, and tried to clean up the throw up as well as he could (Ted had coincidentally went to sleep), thinking about the time when he had walked in on Shannon throwing up in the bathroom, but for an entirely different reason. When he got back to his room, he called her on her cell phone, knowing it would be off, because it was the middle of the night where she was.

"_Hey, you've reached Shannon's voicemail…"_ said her answering machine message. The sound of her voice made him feel more at home, and lulled him to sleep.

_Hope you liked it! Please tell me what you liked and didn't like! Thanks!_


	32. Chapter 32

_**Chapter 32**_

Boone blinked. A ray of light refracted from the window into his eyes, nearly blinding him. He shut his eyes tightly, rolling over onto his other side. He tentatively opened his eyes again, squinting, letting his surroundings slowly make themselves apparent. But the glare from the window was still debilitating, so he slowly stood up, his eyes half closed.

Suddenly, Ben's alarm clock started beeping incessantly. The beeps were so loud and grating, he had to cover his ears with his hands, which in turn made him forgot to squint his eyes. The sound seemed to be digging holes into his ears, while the light left white spots in his eyes after he closed them. He was _never_ going to get drunk again, he decided.

"Dude, shut it off!" Boone groaned, not his usually affable self, and exited the room in a haze.

After he had showered and gotten dressed, Boone felt significantly better, but his lips still tasted salty and dry, and his eyes still felt sensitive to the light. He couldn't remember a thing he had done or said the night before, but he hoped he hadn't divulged too much about Shannon. Boone went into the kitchen area, considering pouring himself a bowl of cereal. But his ears burned as he imagined the sound that the cheerios would make as they clinked against the glass bowl.

"Woah, good morning to you, too," Ted sneered.

"Oh, sorry, didn't notice you," Boone replied, speaking slowly to pronounce his syllables correctly. Just then, Ben shuffled into the kitchen area, pouring himself a gigantic glass of water, downing it in two gulps, along with a handful of rather strong looking pills.

"Don't worry, just Advil," he responded to Boone's shocked look. "Want some?"

"Uh huh." Ben handed Boone a few of the pills, and Boone took them with an equally large glass of water as Ben. "Where's that other girl? Rebecca?"

"She went to sign up for classes," Ted said. "Didn't want to sign up online for some reason. That's what I'm doing, it's much easier that way."

"Uh huh," Boone agreed. He still wasn't sure what he wanted to take, but he had a few ideas. "I'm a gonna do tha' today."

"You don't drink much, man, do you?" Ted asked, amused. "Looks like a pretty killer hangover you've got."

"I _drink_!" He said loudly, hurting his own ears. "God, stop acting like I'm your suborderly!" _Subordinate,_ he corrected in his brain. He cursed his hangover inwardly.

"Yeah, sure, whatever." Ted smirked, taking a sip of his black coffee. "Hey, where's Lilly?"

"I guess she's not awake yet," Ben supposed.

"Should I wake her up?" Boone asked.

"Classes don't start until tomorrow, so I don't see why you need to."

"Oh, fuck!" Boone swore. "You mean I didn't have to get up this early?"

"Calm down, man." Ted rolled his eyes. "You're pissing the shit out of me."

Boone would have said something back, but the truth was, he felt so, for lack of a better word, shitty, that he didn't care enough or have the energy to answer him. Instead, he grabbed his laptop case and abruptly left the dorm room.

Once he made contact with the cool air that reeked of skyscrapers and taxicabs, he decided to walk down to the student center, which he had a vague idea of its location, and sit at a table, drink some coffee, and select his classes through the school's website.

After winding around the majority of the area, he finally discovered that he had passed the center he was looking for approximately four times. Frustrated, the intensity of his headache worsened because of his confusion, he plopped down at a thankfully empty table, and started to take out his laptop.

Once his computer turned on, he went to the NYU website and signed in. The number of courses available, everything from Human Evolution to Chinese History, was mind boggling. Boone referred to his graduation requirement information, which was included in the packet each new student had received at orientation, and decided to get some of his required classes out of the way. Literary Interpretation was worth four credits, and it sounded at least slightly interesting, so he decided to take that course. The class was held twice a week, at varying times and with different instructors, and he had no idea what time, or which teacher, was the best option. He made a note on the back of his graduation requirements page the different times and days it was available.

Boone also knew that he should take something math oriented. Since he wasn't interested in pursuing a math and science based major, he decided against continuing Calculus. Thinking of what Sabrina would appreciate, he decided to take Economics, because it could apply to a business-like major. Boone still didn't know what he wanted to pursue in his life, but he thought that if he majored in Business or Political Science, it would leave a lot of career options open. But for now he was staying undeclared.

Since he was interested in society, and the way that people think, he decided to sign up for sociology – plus it would take care of some of his social science credits. Also, at the orientation, the dean had mentioned freshman seminars, which were discussion-based classes that met in small groups. There was a huge variety of classes to take, but Boone decided on First Amendment Freedom, because he had always harbored a secret interest in things like human rights and now that he wasn't surrounded by a bunch of conservative wasps, maybe he could be more public about this interest. Finally, he added US history to complete his course load.

Finally, he sorted his schedule around so that he had Literary Interpretation on Monday, Sociology lecture and discussion on Tuesday, Literary Interpretation again on Wednesday, followed by First Amendment Freedom in the afternoon. Then, on Thursday, he had a Sociology Lecture and US History, and on Friday, Economic Principles for the entire morning. Even though Sabrina had been quite clear about wanting him to call her first, he was pretty sure that the schedule he had submitted would meet her approval, and if it didn't, then that was just too bad for her, Boone thought. He was an adult now, and he didn't have to submit to her orders.

* * *

For the rest of the day, Boone wandered around the campus, anticipating his first class, Literary Interpretation, the next day. He stayed away from his dorm-mates, not wanting to confront Ted, but took solace in his solitude.

That evening, Boone met Ben and Lilly, along with a nervous looking Becky, in the eating hall. They each had to get their meal cards stamped as they entered the large, industrial-looking room, which contained a wide range of low-rate buffet-style kiosks, everything from tofu to hamburgers. The food was basically glorified cafeteria food, but it wasn't too terrible either. He opted out of some disgusting looking grease-coated pizza, vying instead for some simple chicken, which, judging by the look on Ben's face when he bit into his pizza, was a good idea.

"I'm a vegetarian," Lilly announced as she took a tentative bite of her salad. "Since I was fourteen. I just felt like such a hypocrite – being interested in animal rights while still helping out the meat slaughtering business." She shuddered, and Boone pushed the chicken on his plate uncomfortably.

"I was a vegetarian for about a week," Becky said meekly. Boone wondered when she would open up. "But then Mom got worried about me and said I wasn't getting enough nutrition."

"Oh," Boone replied. "Where are you from, again?"

"Utah," she said.

"Well that's a huge adjustment," Ben said. "What made you decide to come here?"

"Oh…" Becky shrugged. "It's sort of silly, I made the decision when I was feeling really, I don't know, imprisoned… and my parents and I were in a bit of a fight, so that's when I made this rash decision to move here."

"It's a pretty intimidating city at first," Lilly told her comfortingly. "But you'll get used to it, soon enough. You just need to loosen up."

Becky smiled shyly. "Thanks."

Suddenly, Boone's cell phone rang. "Sorry," he said. He hated it when his cell phone went off in public places. It made him feel like the affected little rich boy he wasn't. "Excuse me." He began to stand up.

"It's _fine_, Boone," Lilly laughed. "Don't need to be so polite, you can just get it here."

"Okay," he said, and sat back down. "Hello?"

"Hey, Boone, it's me." It was Shannon, and her voice sounded quiet and far away.

"Shannon, hey. Can I call you back later, I'm in the middle of dinner?" With anyone else he would have just said he couldn't talk, but this was Shannon, and he needed her approval.

"Well… I mean…" She sounded ambivalent.

"Shan, what's wrong?" He looked at the others at the table awkwardly. It was clear they were trying not to eavesdrop.

"Me and Sabrina got in fight." She said, noticeably upset.

"Did she do anything to you?" Boone's tone instantly changed when his protective instincts towards Shannon came into play.

"Boone," her voice cracked, and Boone pictured a lone tear running down her face. If only he could wipe it away from 3000 miles away.

"Shan…it's okay, don't cry," he tried to comfort her.

"Yeah," she tried to say, but her sobs were becoming more and more audible.

"Shannon, I love you." His voice said, but as soon as they had come out, he was shocked by his words. Now he had really blown it. He saw Lilly look down at her plate uncomfortably.

"If you loved me, you'd come home," she cried.

"You know I can't do that now." God, he was an idiot. "Listen, come and visit over winter break."

"I know, but that's still not for like three months. I can't stand it here without you." He felt a wave of guilt wash over him as her words echoed through the receiver, but her words were so intimate that he felt as if she were whispering them in his ear.

"What do you want me to do? Do you want me to talk to her?" He was at a loss for words, increasingly frustrated by how much her unhappiness affected him.

"Yeah, okay," she muttered. "I love you too."

"Yeah…me too," he answered, lovesick.

"I'll get Sabrina," Shannon said. He waited a few moments, dreading speaking to his mother.

"Boone!" Sabrina exclaimed before he could say anything.

"Hi, Mom."

"Why didn't you call me about classes?" Her voice became suddenly angry.

"D-don't you think – " he was going to tell her what he had thought earlier that day, but he didn't feel brave enough. "I'm sorry, I guess I forgot."

"Well, what did you sign up for?"

"Mom, can't we talk about that later, Shannon wanted me to… well, what happened with you two today?"

"You just always have to be her knight in shining armor, don't you, Boone? There's something that's strange about this, you have to admit."

"Strange about what?" He asked dangerously.

"Never mind, it doesn't matter. But what happened between Shannon and I this afternoon is between me and her."

"Well, just… I mean, she's really sensitive, and you probably hurt her feelings. So… I don't know. She's really upset about me leaving, and I don't know what to do about it…"

"It's good for her to not always get what she wants," Sabrina responded matter-of-factly. "You know how Adam spoils her, and you… we know how you are."

"_What_?" Boone asked anxiously, hoping she didn't mean what he thought she meant.

"You have quite the hero-complex, put it that way. Anyway, I have a conference call in approximately fifteen minutes, I have to prepare."

"Can I have – " He was going to ask for Shannon again, but Sabrina had already hung up.

"Is everything okay?" Becky ventured cautiously.

"Yeah… I mean, no. My sister is miserable, and my mom is being impossible." He put his head in his hands. "God, my head hurts like hell."

"We should probably all get to sleep soon. Hey, did you and Ted get into a fight today?" Lilly asked maternally.

"Ugh…" Boone looked up. "I dunno, kinda."

Needless to say, Boone fell asleep the moment he hit the pillow that night. But Shannon's words _I love you_ stirred around in his head, plaguing his dreams and infecting his every thought.

Yay, new chapter. I promise that updates will be coming more quickly now because I have three days of school left and then, summer! Any ideas are suggestions for this story are gladly taken into consideration! I plan on carrying the story until Boone gets the call from Sabrina telling him that Adam died. This is after about 2 years of college, so I have lots of time and not enough ideas to fill that time, though I do have some ideas. Any ideas for future occurrences would be really, really appreciated! Thank you, and remember that if you review, it is proven that it is more likely that Boone will show up at your doorstep declaring his eternal love for you. I can't really guarantee that, actually, but it will make me happy and it is easy to send a review. Thanks to Jeremy for beta-ing this chapter.


	33. Chapter 33

_**Chapter 33**_

Boone woke up at about eight the next morning, which gave him just enough to time to get to his nine o' clock Literary Interpretation Class. Lilly's class had started at eight, so she was already gone, and Ted was God-knows-where, but Ben and Becky were already in the kitchen when he arrived, ready to leave to go to the dining hall. Boone followed them, trying to disguise his nerves. He forced a bowl of cereal down his throat, although he felt too apprehensive to eat, and then pulled out his map, navigating his way to his class.

After about ten minutes, Boone sat on a bench, discouraged. He felt like a dumb seven year old who had wandered off from his mother in a shopping center and gotten lost. He was in college, and he couldn't even locate a building! He looked at his watch – at least he had allowed plenty of time to get there, so he still had about five minutes. He considered his options – keep walking around until he found it, not go to class, or… ask directions? No, he couldn't do that. He could do it himself. He stood up. Should he go left, right, back towards the dining hall? He didn't even have any idea where to start.

Just then, a petite blonde walked by, and she caught Boone's eye. Boone hoped she wasn't trying to flirt with him, because this really wasn't the best time for that. On the other hand, she might be the perfect culprit to ask directions from. "Um, excuse me?"

"Oh, hey," the girl stopped. "What's up?"

"Um…" he started.

"I'm Trish," she held her hand out, smiling. "What's a cute guy like you doing here looking all upset?"

He took her hand and shook it quickly. "I'm Boone," he said slowly, working up his courage. "This is a little embarrassing, but I'm sort of lost." She smiled overzealously at him.

"It's _fine_!" She giggled, and Boone wondered why he seemed to make people try too hard. "Where are you going?"

He showed her the map, and pointed. "It's room number 283 in that building."

"Oh," she flashed her teeth at him again. "We're here," she referred to a spot on the map. "If you just go down this hall and to the left a little bit, you'll be there. 283 is upstairs… you're a freshman?"

"Yeah, it's my first day."

"Really? You're so handsome and mature, I never would have thought you were so young!" She was beginning to scare Boone.

"Uh, thanks."

"See you around," she brushed up against him as she turned around, and winked. _Dear lord_, thought Boone, _were all girls this flirty?_ Boone followed her instructions, finding the building within a few minutes. He glanced at his watch, worried – he was about five minutes late. He quickened his pace, jogging up the stairs, and finally locating room 283. He hesitated before opening the door. His first day of college. What if he said something stupid and everyone laughed at him? What if he hadn't signed up correctly? _Oh, screw it_, he thought, and swung open the door. He looked around – the classroom looked similar to his classes in high school, only the students all had laptops and were milling around quietly, and the seats were all at tables instead of desks. Luckily, the class hadn't commenced yet. He tried to appear nonchalant, walking towards a table near the center of the room.

Suddenly, he felt a cord underneath him, but it was too late. He had already collapsed on the floor, accidentally taking some random girl with him. "Fuck," he accidentally said out loud. "I mean – " he stood up, ignoring the pain he felt in his lower back, where he had hit as he fell down. "I must of – uh, grabbed onto you when I fell. I'm sorry." He looked around. The other members of the class were staring at him, looking either amused or annoyed. Boone felt his face blush noticeably. _What a perfect way to start your first day of college_, he thought, and decided he would have to tell Shannon about it later.

The girl didn't look up, sounding frustrated as she fidgeted with her skirt before standing up. "This is a new skirt, and now it's dirty because _you_ pushed _me_ onto the floor. Thanks a lot." Then she looked up at Boone, and for a split second, her eyes seemed to glaze over. Boone couldn't understand why this had happened, so he started to stand up, brushing off his jeans.

"Again, I'm really sorry. Are you okay?"

She merely nodded. "Yeah," she answered breathlessly, her tone completely changed. "I'll be fine. Uh… my name's Lucy," she held out her hand, and Boone shook it, the second time he had done this in the last ten minutes.

"Boone?" He said, as if he were unsure. "I'm gonna go sit down. Sorry again."

"It's _no_ problem whatsoever!" She laughed. _New York girls are weird_, Boone decided. He sat on the other side of the room, far away from other people, to overcome his embarrassment.

"So," Boone looked to the front of the class, where an extremely approachable looking balding man stood. "If everyone is done falling all over each other, I'm ready to begin class." Boone looked at the linoleum floor, feeling his blush deepen. "I'm Professor Robins, and I'll be your professor for Freshman Literary Interpretation." The class was silent, and that was when Boone noticed that everyone around him looked just as tense as he felt. "You all look petrified. Freshmen always do, you're all the same. Come on, am I really that frightening?" No one answered him, but Boone felt himself relax slightly. "Alright." He didn't sound concerned that no one had responded. "So, this is Literary Interpretation, as I said. We'll be reading probably ten different books over this semester, all quite varied and thought-provoking reads." Boone gulped. _Ten_ books in a semester? The most he'd ever read in high school for a whole _year_ was about that much! "Let me pass out the syllabus, and then we'll go over it." Boone breathed a sigh of relief. A syllabus? This was _just_ like high school. "The syllabus details everything we will be doing this term, including all papers, books, and tests."

After he received the syllabus, which consisted of approximately fifteen pages stapled together, he didn't feel quite as relaxed. First of all, the thing was more the size of a book than a worksheet. Secondly, the print was miniscule, and the pages were double sided, and it looked like it had every assignment for the whole term written on it. "The first three pages is just a brief description of the course aims and expectations…" Boone gaped. _Brief_? He already felt like such a dunce – at St. Gabriel's, he had always been one of the top students. Already, he could see that here, that would not be the case. "I'll let you read that on your own, this _is _college, so I suspect you can read on your own. Alright, so there will be at least four major papers this term – excluding the ones you'll be writing for your midterm and final. A few presentations, nothing too stressful… after all, it's your first semester and I know you're all just getting acquainted with life at NYU. Any questions so far?" A girl with a snub nose waved her hand in the air. "Yes, Miss…?"

"Tiffany Larson," she said, her voice brass. "I was just wondering if we'd be reading any works by Dostoevsky?" A few people scoffed. It was obvious that this girl was trying to impress the teacher, but she wasn't doing a very good job of it.

"I personally find his works irritatingly pretentious, and those who read them to be similarly pretentious," he answered coldly. The girl looked taken back. "Any other questions?" No one said anything. "Well, moving on then. You'll find a list of required books that you will need this semester – this isn't high school, I won't have extra copies on hand, so be prepared. In addition to this, we'll be having many class discussions on the books we read, so it is very important to annotate and assess the text on your own time before coming to class. This way our discussions will be that much more worthwhile." He cleared his throat. "In addition to reading these books, we'll be interpreting some shorter texts, some prose, some poetry. When we complete each text, there will be a comprehensive quiz that covers information from the book. All of this information is subject to appear on your final. Any questions?" Boone looked around before raising his hand tentatively. "Yes, Mr…"

"Um. Boone. Carlyle." He spoke slowly, thanks to his nerves. "Are the quizzes about content, or about specific things that happened in the book, vocabulary, or…" he trailed off.

"All of the above. But if you're asking whether you need to remember the exact address of a minor character in the book, or something similar, then no, that would be an unrealistic expectation. You _are_, however, expected to be able to delve deeply into several of the more primary characters and interpret them as well. This is really an easy class, it's _interpretation._ There aren't many wrong answers. Does that answer your question?"

"Yes. Thank you, Professor." He looked at his shoes.

"We'll talk more exclusively about the essays specified on your syllabus when we're actually reading the books, so they'll be more relevant to you," he announced, skimming through the thick packet himself. "But a few general points I need to make about essays – it would be in your best interest to write this down – " The sound of students shuffling through their bags became audible. Boone dug through his laptop case, which also contained pencils, pens, and notebooks, because he hadn't known exactly what he'd need, and selected a professional-looking ballpoint pen, and opened his notebook to the first page. _Points about Essay-Writing_, he wrote as his title, and put his name and date on the corner. "First of all, _no spelling or grammatical errors_. This is a university, so trivial mistakes such as these will _not_ be accepted." Boone made a mental note to himself to use spell-check more often. "Also, when I say 'short paper', I mean about four to six pages. A major paper means about ten, twenty pages." Boone shuddered. He had never even attempted to write twenty pages for one assignment in his entire life. He was beginning to regret the fact that he had signed up for five different classes. The rest of the class blended into a soup of intimidation, and by the time it was over, they had already been assigned a rather large portion of reading.

* * *

After class, he went back to his dorm to recover from his first class, but as usual, found his thoughts drifting to Shannon. Shannon's long blonde hair falling in soft wavy strands at her shoulders, her pink lips puckered as she applied lip gloss. He even thought about her feet, and how she always painted her toe-nails a bright color. But suddenly he realized that he didn't know what color they were right now. A wave of emotion overcame him, and all of the sudden, he needed to feel closer to her. Boone made sure there was no one else in the dorm, and then locked himself in the bathroom, putting into practice a task that had fulfilled some of his most desperate desires towards Shannon in past years.

_I hope that last bit made sense, lol. Also, I hope this chapter wasn't too boring – don't worry, I dislike writing academic stuff as much as you dislike reading it! As usual, please review, and constructive criticism is definitely welcomed. It's my last day of school! Yahoo! _


	34. Chapter 34

_**Chapter 34**_

For the next few months, Boone worked harder than he ever had before. In high school, getting A's meantcompleting homework, doing reasonably well on tests, and behaving conscientiously. But in college, he wasn't going to be handed good grades. He wouldn't be able to get away with skimming through his reading, or looking over science information for twenty minutes before a test and calling it studying.

Luckily, Sociology didn't seem like it would be too strenuous. The teacher, Professor Garrett, was a woman in her thirties who insisted on being called her first name, Alison, and although the amount of reading they received was significant, it was a much more laid-back class than Literary Interpretations and was more based onimpromptu discussions. His US History professor was lively and enthusiastic, but his personality was misleading; he and Ben agreed that his tests were nearly impossible.

Economics was pretty dull, Boone had to admit. His mother was pleased that he was taking the class, but the professor had been teaching for almost twenty years, and even he seemed bored with his own subject. It wasn't much harder than his high school classes, but learning about money – well, even though he was in a higher tax bracket, he just wasn't all that interested in finances.

Boone's favorite class was his freshman seminar: First Amendment Freedom. The class was comprised of a small group of about twenty students, and mainly, they just had a discussion that the professor, a young woman named Professor Daly, proctored. They didn't have very much homework assigned, only to write opinion essays, which she graded loosely, and to read about cases in history relating to the First Amendment. Boone considered himself a liberal, but some of the students in the class were almost libertarian – they seemed to go on peace marches almost every day. In fact, they had invited Boone a couple times, but he hadn't taken them up on their offer. He disagreed with the Iraq war, but he wasn't sure if he was ready to go on a march with a bunch of vegans yet.

The days seemed to race by, and Boone was surprised by how suddenly his birthday came. Just a little while ago he had just moved, and suddenly it was November. On the day of, November 12th, he had treated himself to a pancake breakfast with Ben and Lilly, and skipped Economics for a day. Lilly had bought him a scarf and Ben got him some book that was supposed to be funny. But the whole day, he had waited desperately for a call from Shannon, who finally called him right after he went to bed – he spoke to her in a hushed voice from his bed as not to wake Ben. When she had to leave, she had sung him "Happy Birthday" in his ear through the receiver, giggling, and Boone had gone to sleep feeling elated. The next day, however, he paid the price for skipping Economics when he realized that he had missed about four pages of notes.

* * *

One Friday night nearing the end of November, Boone was reading a novel for Literary Interpretations in his dorm room when Ben appeared, looking anxiously through his drawers for something. "You coming?" He asked breathlessly.

"Coming where?" Boone looked up from his book, wondering what he was talking about.

"No one told you? David's party?" David was a loud, obnoxious guy in their US History class who had exchanged about ten words with Boone.

"I didn't know there was a party…" he trailed off, wondering why he hadn't been invited. "Is it like, invitation?"

"Of course not, it's a college party." Boone shuddered. High school parties were bad enough – how much wilder would this one be? "Wanna come?"

"I dunno," he shrugged. He truly didn't know whether or not he wanted to attend. Maybe he would consult with a higher authority. "Hold on for a few minutes, okay?"

"Alright, man, I'll be in the kitchen waiting," Ben grabbed his shoes and left the room.

Boone dialed Shannon's number, and was relieved when she answered on the third ring. "Hey, Boone," he could detect the smile in her voice. "What's up?"

"I have to ask you something," he said. "I know this is sort of silly, but – "

"No, you can't get away with wearing pink," she interrupted.

"That's not what I was going to say!" He argued, but he was grinning just the same. "Okay, so there's this party tonight, and I don't know if I should go or not."

"If you want to…" she trailed off. Maybe calling her hadn't been the best idea. "I mean, whatever."

"It's like, a college party," he tried to give himself more of a good reason for calling.

"Here I thought you meant you were gonna go party it up at a retirement home," she answered dryly. "Of course it's a college party."

"So what would you do?"

"A bunch of girls are gonna hit on you," she changed the subject. "Tell them, hand's off. You're mine," she joked. Boone laughed, but her comment hit him hard.

"Don't worry, Shan, I'll just put a sign on my forehead saying that."

"Well, only under that condition, then you can go," she said, faux-serious. "No, I think you should go. You need to get out more, you're such an old man."

"Thanks, Shannon."

"No problem," she chirped. "I gotta go, love you, bye!"

"Love you –" he started, but she had already hung up.

Boone changed into a more fashionable shirt, and went to the bathroom to attempt to comb his hair. A few minutes later, he was following Ben out of the dorm room. "Where's Lilly?" He asked.

"She went home for the weekend," Ben explained. "Didn't she tell you?"

"No one tells me anything," he replied. "So, where exactly is this party?"

"Just down the street a bit," they walked down the stairs and outside.

"Why are we going to this again?" He wondered out loud a few seconds later.

"Shut up, Carlyle."

"Okay," he agreed. They turned down the block, and Ben pointed to a generic looking apartment building. He saw the lights on in a room on the third story, and could hear loud noise coming from it.

When they reached the party, Boone really started to regret his decision to come. It was like a high school party, but everything was harder – harder music, harder drinks, drugs, everything. The room was medium-sized, but packed to the brim; Boone was sure it was a fire hazard. He tried to walk in undetected and stick with Ben, but Ben had already disapeared into the crowd. Boone located an empty seat on one of the couches and sat down cautiously, hoping there wasn't some foreign substance on it. A few people, including Ben, sat down near him a few seconds later, and one of the people, a greasy looking guy, pulled what looked like a joint out of a plastic bag. He lit it up, and took a drag. The guy nodded towards Ben. "Want some?"

"Sure," Ben said, and Boone looked at him warily. Ben took a drag as well, and, leaning back comfortably, gestured towards Boone with it. "Hey man, want some?" Boone regarded the joint. Most people his age had smoked before. And he was in college, everyone smoked pot in college. On the other hand, he didn't want to get sick, and, he didn't want to get caught.

"No thanks," he waved it away.

"You sure?" Ben asked, then shrugged and then, closing his eyes, inhaled another smoke. Then he passed it back to the original guy. "Here you go, Elliott," he said slowly.

"Thanks," he took a puff off of it. A girl with brown hair sat down, and asked for some. She too, took a smoke off the joint. He suddenly felt like the odd one out – maybe, for once, he would rebel. The next time Ben passed the joint past Boone, he stopped him.

"Actually, I'll have some," he decided. Taking the joint between his thumb and forefinger, he brought it between his lips, and inhaled slightly, copying what he had seen Ben do. He tried to hold back a cough. He felt a bit of smoke making its way through his mouth, but the small amount didn't seem to have any instant effects on him.

"Never smoked before?" Elliott asked.

"N-no," he said nervously.

"You gotta take a little more. You'll feel it when it happens," Ben added lazily. "Go on, try again."

Boone took a deeper inhalation from the joint, waiting a moment before removing his lips from it. He didn't exhale this time. He waited a few moments – Ben was right, he could tell it was happening. Suddenly, his whole body felt lose and relaxed. He passed the joint to the girl, and then leaned up against the back of the couch, a sluggish smile pasted on his face.

"How is it?" Ben asked.

"Good," he laughed slowly. "That's good." He felt a rush of… something through his head, and a strange warmth pervade his body. Ben, Elliott, and Boone passed around the joint, Boone taking consecutively longer drags each time it was passed to him. When they finished the joint, he was good and stoned, and he knew it. He could feel a dryness in his throat, and had a sudden craving for something salty. But he didn't want to stand up to go get some food. He looked over to where Ben and Elliott had been, and blinked, surprised that they weren't there anymore. He shrugged, and stayed on the couch for a while longer, when suddenly a girl with long wavy blonde hair stumbled over next to him, and sat down. She was pretty, so Boone smiled at her. She was about Shannon's height, and her hair was the same color.

"Hey gorgeous," the girl slurred terribly.

"Shannon," he said, because she reminded him of her.

"Noooo," she laughed exaggeratedly. "My name's Jenny!" She giggled. Boone noticed that her mouth was a lot bigger than Shannon's. "You're really hot," her eyes were wide and bloodshot.

"Thanks," he looked at her. Her shirt swooped low over her chest and revealed a considerable amount of cleavage. "I'm Boone."

"I'm Jenny," she said again.

"I know," he touched her shoulder unflinchingly. In a normal mind state, he would have already walked away, but at the moment, he was feeling happy and horny and not much else.

"How do you know?" She sounded confused.

"Cuz you just said," he laughed, and grabbed her arm, pulling her closer. "I'm really hungry, are you hungry?" He said in her ear.

"Let's go over to the food at that table," she pulled him up and dragged him over to the table. "Want some punch?" She shakily motioned to a bowl full of an indescribably colored liquid.

"What's in it?"

"I dunno, I had some, and…" she caught her balance on the side of the table.

"I think I'll pass," he held her arm to try to stable her. Then he saw a bowl of potato chips, and quickly downed a handful. "Oh my god, these are so good," he gushed.

"Are you stoned?" She laughed, leaning into him. But Boone ignored her, grabbing another handful of chips and practically stuffing them into his mouth. Then, hefelt ridiculously thirsty.

"Is there water?" She nodded, handing him a bottle of water.

"Just one left, lucky," she giggled. "You're hot," she said for the third time.

"You said that, too." He smiled, wishing she would just shut up when she was so obviously high.

"Let's sit down," she said, and sauntered back to the couch. Boone followed her, and watched as she pulled another joint out of her pocket and tried to light it up. "You want some?" She asked.

"Yeah," he said, and took an overenthusiastic drag from it, feeling its effects almost instantly. Itwas a lot stronger than whatever he had had before."Woah," he said, looking back at her.Her eyes were totally bloodshot, and her eyeliner was running, but under it all, he still detected a startling similarity between her and Shannon's looks. "Come here," he said, and pulled her into his lap. She laughed, and took a drag off the joint. Then she started kissing him sloppily, and it was probably just because he was stoned, but it felt amazing. He kissed her back, exploring her mouth fully. It had been too long since he'd kissed someone.

"Hey, what's your name again?" She asked, pulling back. "Brendan?"

"No, it's Boone," he reminded her. "Shannon – "

"Jenny," corrected Jenny.

"Jenny!" A voice said, and Boone turned around to see a rather intimidating guy standing there, furious. Jenny looked up, and crawled out of Boone's lap. "I leave you alone for half a second and you're already making out with some other guy! You're such a whore, Jenny!"

"Um – I," she turned around and glared at Boone. "Why'd you kiss me, asshole?" She slurred, and stood up.

"Dude," the guy said, holding Jenny up. "Stay away from my girl." And with that, he walked away.

"I'm so _sorry_," he apologized profusely. "I didn't know." Then he stood up to go get some more chips.

"Hey, Boone, there you are," he looked up to see Ben standing next to him at the table. "Oh no, you've got the munchies, don't you?"

He nodded. "I just hooked up with this girl who was high."

"Dude!" Ben grinned. "Score!"

"She had a boyfriend, though. I just found out."

"Oh, that really sucks!" His expression changed drastically. "You wanna head out?" He asked after a moment.

"Yeah," he followed Ben unsteadily out of the room, and down the stairs. "Ben?" He asked when they reached outside. He was suddenly overcome by a overwhelming feeling of nausea.

"Yeah?"

"I think I'm gonna be sick…"

"Oh no!" Ben exclaimed. "Not here, um…" but it was too late, because right then, Boone threw up on the side of the street.

"I'm sorry," he said. "Oh my god, I've never… like…"

"My first time smoking I only had a couple drags. You had like almost a whole joint. Just pace yourself next time," Ben said. "Come on, let's get back, you'll probably want to shower."

"Can we go get a sandwich first?" He asked, still feeling starving.

"You serious?" Ben raised his eyebrows. "You really _do_ have the munchies, don't you?"

Boone nodded. "I guess so."

"Let's just go back to the dorm, please?"

"Fine," Boone shrugged, suddenly feeling dirty and wrong. "I think I'll just go to bed." When they arrived at the dorm, Boone collapsed onto the couch, and was asleep within seconds.

_Well, that was supposed to be funny, but I kind of feel like I failed. Hopefully it wasn't so bad._ _I've never smoked before, so I hope his reactions to it were somewhat realistic._


	35. Chapter 35

**_Chapter 35_**

Boone looked down at his eight-page Literary Interpretations essay. The entire paper was about eight-thousand words, and he had locked himself in his dorm room the moment it was assigned, working on it for several hours each night for the past week and a half. He had reread the two books he was meant to be comparing, taken excessive notes on each of them, researched several articles relating to the books, and checked it over multiple times on spell check and with his own eye, making sure that every word fit perfectly and sounded sophisticated and profound.

Blaring across the center of the first page was a large letter D. Boone looked around the classroom, trying to hold himself back from uttering the mess of cuss words that were swirling around his brain. Then he looked back at the page. A D? Boone had never gotten a D in his life on anything! Maybe there had been a mistake, he tried to convince himself, flipping through the rest of the essay. Comments were speckled along the margins of the page – things like, "ambiguous argument" and "dull voice", even "ridiculous and irrelevant point". He turned to the last page, where Professor Robins had left a lengthy comment. In a criticism that particularly stung, he had written, "Your arguments lack originality and contain almost no continuity...This essay reads more like a dull science textbook than an interpretive paper". Boone shuddered, feeling bristled and hurt, not to mention concerned about his grade in the class.

After the lesson concluded, Boone boldly approached the professor. "Excuse me, um, Professor Robins?" He asked.

"Yes?" He had been rustling some papers around at his desk, but he paused, looking up at his concerned student.

"I just wanted to ask you about the grade I got for the midterm essay…" he trailed off.

"Let me see," he took the paper from Boone's hands. "Every year I get at least a few students like you, Boone," he began. "You're a student who is used to getting A's, aren't you?" Boone nodded slightly. "Well, I can see why. In terms of mechanics, this _is_ an A paper. It's fairly well organized, no spelling mistakes, decent vocabulary…" He flipped through the essay.

"Then why did I get a D?" He interjected.

"Boone, if you had read my comments at the end, they should be fairly self-explanatory. You've got no _voice_. And that's what this class is about. Formulating your own opinions, creating your own tone and expression. I'm sure you're quite satisfactory at things like lab write-ups and analytical essays." He paused, and Boone half-smiled expectantly. "But this paper could have been written by a robot. You just need to try out different styles, a more natural style, if you will."

"Okay," Boone said mechanically. "Is there any way I can revise this paper to get a better grade?"

"I suppose I could let you revise it for one letter grade. But that's not the point. The point is that you need to learn to _think_, not just regurgitate information. How do you _feel_? If you look at the prompt, it's asking you to write about your own personal opinion, backed up by situations from each text."

"Yeah," he agreed. Thinking back, he had just presented situations behind each opinion, but never mentioned which one he thought was better. "Thank you, Professor."

"It's no problem. Have that essay in to me for next class, alright?"

"Okay," Boone said, relieved. But he knew he had his work cut out for him.

* * *

When he got back to the dorm room, Ben was in the kitchen, making himself a sandwich. Lilly was at a class, and Becky was studying in her dorm room. Ted, of course, was MIA. "Hey," Ben greeted him warmly, looking up from spreading peanut butter on his slice of bread. "What's up?"

"What did you get on the Literary Interpretation essay?" He asked. Ben wasn't in his class, but he had the same teacher at a different time.

"Oh," he motioned towards the table. "I was just looking at it, it's right there." Boone picked up the essay, which was about four pages, from the table. "I got like, an A -?"

"Seriously?" Boone asked, frustrated. "I got a D!" Suddenly, he heard the door slam behind him.

"California boy got a D!" Lilly emerged from the doorway suddenly, shocking Boone. "Hey," she greeted him, kissing him on the cheek.

"Hi," he replied. "Yeah, I got a D on an essay. So go inform the authorities or something," he looked down. Lilly took Ben's paper from out of his hands, but not before giving Ben a hello-kiss as well. "That's not mine, that's Ben's," Boone explained.

Lilly flipped through Ben's paper. "Damn," she said, "I wish I was Asian."

"Don't we all?" Boone responded dully. "Here Ben, take your stupid paper."

Ben laughed. "Someone's a wee bit jealous." He took the paper from Boone's hands. "I gotta go, I'm supposed to meet this girl for lunch."

"Who's the lucky girl?" Lilly asked sarcastically.

"Her name's Michelle. She's in my Calculus class."

"Oooooh…"

"Quit being immature, Lilly," Ben tried to sound serious. "See you," he began to leave the dorm, leaving Lilly and Boone alone. "Oh!" Lilly remembered. "Today your sister, Shannon, called."

"Really?" Boone perked up, wondering what she had had to say.

"Yeah, actually, you left your cell phone on the table, and it rang while you were gone, so I picked it up, and then she started lecturing me… something about keeping my hands off of you or something? It was weird."

Boone laughed. "I'm sure she didn't mean it, she just got the wrong idea or something." He was secretly flattered.

"Yeah, _sure_. Anyway, she said for you to call."

"Okay," Boone said, content. His day was going to take a turn for the better now that he had a conversation with Shannon to look forward to.

* * *

He was just about to leave a message for her when Shannon picked up. "Boone!" she exclaimed, a bit of a whine in her voice.

"Hey," he said sincerely, closing the door of his dorm behind him. "What's up?"

"Where _were_ you?" She asked, sounding suddenly frustrated.

"I was at class," he said.

"Who was that girl who picked up?" She said suspiciously.

"Lilly, my roommate," he explained.

"Well who _is _she? And what was she doing picking up _your _cell phone?" Shannon raised her voice.

"I was at class, and I must have left it on the table, so she picked it up for me." He tried to explain rationally.

"Is she – I mean, are you guys…" she started.

"You jealous?" He joked.

"Well, I mean, like…" she clearly didn't realize he was kidding.

"Shannon, I'm kidding. We're just friends."

"Promise?" Her voice was small on the other line.

"Yeah, of course. She's not my type, anyway."

"What_ is_ your type?" she asked wryly, pushing Boone into a figurative corner.

"I like blondes," he laughed uncomfortably, but then just decided it would be easier to play along with her. "Tall, funny blondes…"

"Uh huh?" She coaxed him to keep going, clearly eating up what he was saying.

"With light brown eyes…"

"I know someone who's like that!" She giggled. "But unfortunately you've got some competition."

"What?" He suddenly became uneasy.

"Yeah. I went out with this guy Porter the other night."

"Oh," he tried not to let his dismay become apparent in his tone. "That's… good."

"I can tell you're going into protective brother mode," she guessed. "But don't worry. You'd really like him, I swear."

"Really?" He seriously doubted this.

"Yeah, he's really sweet and he's such a gentleman! Actually, he reminds me of you a lot."

"Oh…" This did not make him feel better.

"We're going out again tonight. And he's coming to see my ballet performance on Friday."

"I really wish I could make it to that," he said regretfully.

"Yeah, me too. But you can't. We have a huge one early in the summer though, and you'll be back for that."

"Yeah… you know I love seeing you dance."

"Yeah I know." She paused, and he could hear her breathing on the line. "Boone?"

"Yeah?" He said, anticipating what she was about to say.

"Um..." she trailed off. "Never mind."

"Oh-kay," he tried to hide his disappointment, and decided to change the subject. "So, I got this paper back today, and I kind of did really bad on it."

"Because a B+ is _so horrible_!" He was sure she was rolling her eyes on the other line.

"Seriously, Shan, I got a D."

"A D? Are you _high_?" Boone shuddered. How had she found out?

"What? That was only once, and –"

"That's not what I meant, I - Wait a second, you got high?" She laughed in disbelief. "Oh my god, spill!"

"It was only once…"

"Shut up and explain, Boone!"

"Fine… you know that party that I called you about?" He started cautiously.

"Yes, unfortunately."

"Well, I went, and I sort of smoked some pot."

She snorted. "You've got to be kidding me. Sweet, innocent Boone Carlyle got _stoned_?"

"Sshh! Where are you, my mom might hear!"

"Chill out, she's not here."

"Okay, just making sure."

"So, what did you do?" She asked.

"Um, weed?"

"Boone, I know. You are _so dense_ sometimes!" Boone was utterly confused. "What did you do while you were stoned?"

"Ummm," he debated whether or not to tell her.

"Did you hook up with someone?" She guessed right off the bat.

"Well, yeah, I kinda made out with this random girl."

"Oooooh," she mocked. "What was her name?"

"Like Jenny or something."

"Was she pretty?" Shannon sing-songed.

"Yeah," he shrugged.

"As pretty as me?" She coaxed.

"'Course not, no one's as pretty as you." He was surprised how easily he let her win. She giggled girlishly.

"You know, I've never smoked pot before." She said after a moment.

"Really?" Frankly, he was a bit surprised. Shannon had always been the wild one in the family.

"I've tried cigarettes. But I didn't want to try pot, because doesn't it make you really hungry?"

"Oh, yeah, I guess. You don't need to worry about that though, you're really thin already."

"Not like the other girls at ballet."

"Oh no, Shannon, not this again. I thought that you had gotten over that – you know, the throwing up…"

"I_ am_ over it," she said. "Pretty much."

"Does that mean –" he started.

"Look, Boone!" She suddenly sounded angry. "It's my business and my business only, and I'm trying to stop, _alright_?"

"Yeah, okay, I'm _sorry_."

"It's fine," she said quietly. "I shouldn't have yelled at you."

"No, you're right. It's your business." He didn't truly believe this. It both sickened and troubled him that she was still throwing up.

"So guess what?" She changed the subject.

"What?"

"Anna's like totally different now." She said. "Like, she is dressing all sophisticated, and she's stopped swearing. I think she also lost some weight. She got a spread in some teen magazine for this fashion thing too."

"That's good," he said, not really caring that much. He was still worried about Shannon. But his English essay, lying dauntingly on his desk, was calling him. "Look, Shan, I gotta go work on my English essay."

"Alright," she said reluctantly. "Oh, we have to plan for when I'm coming over break soon!"

"Yeah, I know!" He said earnestly. "I'm so excited!"

"Me too. I'm excited to see New York, too!"

"Yeah… see you, Shannon."

"Bye, I love you," he could hear the smile in her voice.

"'Love you too, bye." He hung up, sighing. Just then, he was interrupted by a knock on the door. He opened it, and standing in the doorway was Becky.

"Um, hi," she said. "I was just wondering if I could use some of the peanut butter on the table?"

"It's not mine, but Ben probably won't notice if you do take some."

"_Really?_ Do you think that's okay?" Her eyes widened.

"Of course it's okay, Becky. It's just peanut butter," he put his hand on her shoulder comfortingly, but she flinched away, her face bright red with embarrassment. "Alright then," he said awkwardly. She was certainly overreacting, all he had done was touch her.

Boone closed the door and sat down at his laptop, looking at his essay on the screen hopelessly. He highlighted the entire thing and deleted it, trying to take into account what Professor Robins had said about it. _Personal voice_, he thought, and after staring at the screen for a few minutes, was struck by an idea, and began typing.

He had gotten a large chunk of his essay done when he heard a noise in the living room of the dorm. Wondering what it was, he stood up and headed towards the living room. Boone was shocked to see that Ben and some girl were in there, heavily kissing in the doorway. Boone cleared his throat, and Ben pulled away clumsily.

"Um... sorry, I didn't know you were here..." he said uncomfortably. "Uh... Michelle, this is my roommate, Boone. Boone, Michelle..." he introduced them awkwardly.

"Hi," he said.

"Hey," she smiled. "Ben, if you want, we can go to my dorm, my roommate's out right now."

"Okay, good idea," he said. "Bye Boone." Boone was relieved. The last thing he wanted right now was to listen to Ben and some girl having sex. He shuddered just thinking about it.

"Bye…" He said uncertainly. Clearly, Ben did not agree with the term "taking it slow", did he? Ben turned around as he left the dorm, winking secretively at Boone. Boone gave him a reassuring smile back, shaking his head.

Some people could go through life feeling no guilt, no repercussions about what they did. But Boone wasn't one of those people. He knew that his feelings for Shannon, and what he did about them, were tattooed inside of him forever, and there was no way to escape them. And they could never be together.

_Please review! Thanks everyone for reading/reviewing! I hope you liked it. _


	36. Chapter 36

_**Chapter 36**_

Boone was nearing the end of his first semester at college. It was surreal to him how quickly time seemed to be moving – like his whole life was on fast-forward. Sometime at the beginning of December, the truth had dawned on him that he only had a few weeks left until finals, and he also began anticipating Shannon's visit.

Finals, and studying for them, passed in a blur – a boring, frustrating, monotonous blur. Boone had turned in his essay revisions for Literary Interpretations and raised his grade to a B-. Since their grades were only based on a few assignments, this was his grade going into the final, an in-class essay. Boone tried to take what Professor Robins had said and use it in the most constructive fashion, but he was afraid that perhaps he had made his tone in the essay a bit _too_ casual.

They didn't really have a final in his First Amendment Freedom seminar; instead, they had an impromptu debate, and received a grade based on how much they participated and how researched and knowledgeable their points were. Boone was quite confident that he had done well on this final. After the final, one of the libertarians asked for Boone's phone number, saying that he would call him about this "really exciting and provocative peace rally". Boone thanked him, not quite sure if he would actually take him up on this offer.

In U.S. History, they had a long short answer section, and then an even longer essay to write during the final period. There was no denying it – the final was very difficult, and Boone wasn't sure he had done especially well. He had calculated that if he got a C on the final, then he would have a B- in the class, a grade that Sabrina would not be too happy about. Actually, he would be rather disappointed in himself as well if this were to occur.

The Sociology Final was surprisingly easy. Boone was expecting to receive a fairly high mark in the class, perhaps even scraping by with an A. Boone found what he learned in the class to be very interesting and thought-provoking. Human behavior, whether in private or in groups, was so complex and multi-faceted, that Boone felt he would be lucky to even understand himself, much less other people. Still, sociology and psychology was a subject in which he was interested in pursuing.

His Economics Final, like the class, was boring. He thought he had probably gotten a B, which was good, but would it be good enough for Sabrina? However, his semester at NYU, being away from home, had caused him to ignore her opinions more – it was easier when he was 5000 miles away. But that distance hadn't changed how he felt about Shannon. Walking back to his dorm after the final, he thought about how when he got on the plane to New York, he had told himself he wasn't going to love her anymore. And he couldn't do it. Even though he knew he should, and had tried, he had loved her so long that his feelings had compounded themselves into his personality.

He called her when he got back to the dorm, to finalize the plans for her visit. She was coming on Sunday night, _only two days from today_, he thought, anticipating the moment he opened the door and saw her. He wondered what she would say, what she would do. Would she hug him, or give him a kiss? What would she be wearing? Chances were, she would be completely underdressed for the weather, despite his warnings about how cold it was going to be. Boone had experienced his first snow a few days before, and he had been walking through campus with only a sweatshirt on. Yes, he had learned from that experience. After that, he had rushed to the nearest Any Mountain and bought himself a real, honest-to-god jacket, that when worn, made him look like a giant blueberry. The woman who worked in the store, had smiled and flitted her eyelashes at Boone, insisting he get the jacket in blue so it would match his "beautiful eyes". Boone also noticed that the woman had to be at least thirty-five, and was wearing a wedding ring. _Why was everyone always acting so silly around him_, he wondered.

Boone was tired after taking all of his finals, so on

* * *

Friday evening, he was just planning to relax – maybe rent a movie, or read a book, or just go to bed early. But Boone had been cooped up in his dorm room studying for the last two weeks, so when Ben asked if he wanted to smoke, Boone happily accepted, relieved to put real life on hold, if just for a few hours.

Boone suggested that they ask Lilly along as well, but Ben said he would rather not, shaking his head with vehemence. Boone wondered why, but didn't want to be intrusive, so he didn't ask what was going on. Actually, now that he thought about it, something between Ben and Lilly had been awkward lately – Boone could trace it back to roughly the time when Ben began seriously dating Michelle.

Ben said he knew a good place to smoke, and led him up to the roof of their dormitory building, after they had bundled up in jackets and scarves to protect them against the harsh, cold New York air. Boone hadn't gotten stoned since the time at the party, and he knew he shouldn't make a habit of it, but honestly, he liked the carefree, open feeling it gave him. Not to mention it was quite a rush and an escape from the trivialities of real life. At first, neither of them said much as they passed the joint back and forth, just casual conversation that became more eccentric as the chemicals began to take control of their brains. Growing up without a father, he had missed out on male bonding time, so now he thought was a good time to make up for it.

Now, Ben's eyes had taken on a drier consistency, and Boone was pretty sure his eyes were considerably bloodshot as well. Ben was lazily telling some long-winded story about the male anatomy. Boone was laughing along, his perception of the amusement level of the story heightened because he was under the influence. The conversation started to get more intimate as time went on, and Boone tried to ignore the dry feeling he was getting in his mouth. Somehow, the discussion had veered to the subject of their first sexual experiences.

"I was sixteen," Ben was saying. "I'd barely even kissed anyone before. My older sister and brother and some of their friends were all at my house.." Boone laughed loudly, anticipating where the story was going. "We were all pretty drunk – my mom and dad were out of town – and next thing I knew, I was screwing my older sister's best friend. She was like, at least eighteen." Boone snorted with laughter, taking another drag on the joint.

"That's like…" Boone was trying to think of that term that meant having sex with a minor that was illegal, but he couldn't remember it, probably thanks to the weed. "Was it good?" He asked.

"My sister's friend –Pam – she was a goddess!" Ben raved. "Holy shit, I was obsessed with her! But the next day, she pretended it hadn't happened."

"That really sucks, man," Boone said.

"No fucking kidding," Ben agreed. "So tell me about yours – I bet you got laid by some gorgeous blonde California girl twice your age – or two gorgeous blonde California girls at the same time!"

Boone chuckled violently. "Wha' the fuck, man?" He managed in disbelief. "Naw, but it was my sister's best friend, too."

"Woah, no kidding," Ben's eyes widened tipsily. "Tha's weird…"

"Yeah, it is. She was hot as shit, but I didn't really like her that much."

"How hot?"

"Like _really_ hot. And she was always prancing around in these like _come fuck me_ clothes, lots of cleavage, and she had a nice ass too," Boone rambled. When he wasn't under the influence, he would _never_ be speaking this chauvinistically. "And she was kind of kinky."

"Then why the hell did you not like her!" Ben nearly yelled. "God, can I have her?"

"She just didn't do it for me," he said, unable to control what came out of his mouth. "Not like Shannon."

"Not like – " Ben started. "Wait, what?"

Suddenly, Boone was pouring out everything he felt about Shannon to Ben. He wasn't sure how he let his most carefully guarded secret out so easily, but the truth was, he had never felt such a strong connection to a friend as he did Ben – they just understood each other, and Boone trusted him. "She's not my sister _really_, she's my stepsister, and I've… I've loved her since day 1 when she moved in. She's the most beautiful, amazing, mesmerizing girl, and I want her so bad – " he coughed, ignoring the shocked expression on Ben's face. "I want her so bad I can't stand it! She's all I ever think about – god damnit I just need to hold her and kiss her and make love to her; I need her to let me love her." He stopped, feeling sudden remorse for pouring out all this private information. But there was no turning back now. "It's so wrong to feel like this, but I can't make these feelings go away, no matter what I do. No one can fill her space – I need her to breathe. But she'll never love me like I love her. We'll never be together. And it's just – " he broke down, putting his head in his hands. "Is it always going to hurt this much?" He didn't even try to stop the tears from rolling down his cheeks. "As much as I want to hate her," he struggled to say something coherent. "I cant… I'm _obsessed _with her." He stopped talking, letting his silence ring out into the crisp New York air, and if only for a moment, the city seemed silent. "I'm in love with my sister."

"Boone…" Ben finally said.

"I don't blame you if you think I'm disgusting," Boone said, the reality setting in that he's actually _told_ him. Ben didn't say anything, and Boone began to fear the worst.

"I don't think you're disgusting," he said eventually. "I just don't know what to say."

"I'm delirious just thinking about her," he added, not really sure why. "She's all I ever wanted." Ben nodded. "If you took away everything from me – my house, my money, everything – and gave me her… I'd be the happiest person alive." Boone reached slowly back to the joint, but Ben stopped him.

"I think you've had enough," he said simply. "Boone, I don't know what it's like t-to feel that way. I can't even imagine how it is. But I really, really wish I could help you."

"Things are gonna be really weird between us now, aren't they?" Boone said glumly. "Act normal, okay? Don't be any different to me now that I've told. You're the only person I've ever told. _Ever_." Ben nodded again, and they sat quietly for a few moments.

"I think I love her," Ben announced.

"Who?" Boone looked up, surprised. Was he talking about Michelle?

"Lilly," Ben closed his eyes. "Lilly, Lilly, Lilly," he tested her name on his tongue.

"Oh," was all Boone said, too emotionally full to react. "What are you gonna do about it?"

"I dunno," Ben rested his head against the railing of the stairway behind him. "What are you gonna do?"

"No idea… I got nothing."

The two boys sat on the roof quietly, letting the night caress them into some form of comfort. Eventually, they went back downstairs, and Boone fell into bed, prepared for yet another night of dreams plagued by Shannon.

_I hope you liked it! I'm pretty excited for Ben/Lilly, what do you guys think of that? Also, about Boone confessing - was that good or bad? Please review! _

_Thanks,_

_Mari _


	37. Chapter 37

_A/N: Wow, getting up there chapter-wise! There will be 50ish chapters total, so we're kind of nearing the end, but not really. I was just remembering how back in January I was writing Chapter 37 (AKA the last chapter) of Resistance. I think this story is a lot better/more realistic than Resistance, though it may not be as fun because we don't get Shoone sex like every other chapter. Haha. Well, I'll get on with the chapter – Shannon's visit! Yay! _

**6/26 – I added a bit to the ending. **

_**Chapter 37**_

When Boone answered the door on Sunday evening, he didn't even have a moment to look at Shannon before she flung her entire body weight into his arms. He was too happy, too excited to care what the others, also in the living room, were thinking. "Boone!" she squealed, not minding the fairly awkward fact that he was holding her up, his hands resting under her thighs, and that Ben, Lilly, and Becky were watching in shock. The only sign that Ted even resided there was the distant sound of death metal wafting from his room. She loosened her grip around his shoulders, pulling back to look at him. "Oh my god, I missed you SO much!"

"Yeah, god, me too!" He exclaimed eagerly, hugging her to him again.

"It's so nice to finally see a Carlyle that's not Sabrina," she giggled. "Here, let me down," she bit her lip, a whine in her voice. Boone released his grip on her, letting her hop out of his arms. Finally, Boone was able to stand back to look at the sister he had missed so dearly while being away. He was still mesmerized by her exquisite beauty. She was wearing her long blonde hair down, mussed by the snow that was currently falling from the sky. She was certainly more covered up than she was in California – she had replaced her usual miniskirt with jeans, that still managed to hug her body, achieving the same sexiness that the skirts did, if not more. She was also wearing a fleece black jacket, topped off with a colorful striped scarf. It was her eyes, however, that attracted her to him the most. They sparkled with a honey glow that Boone had forgotten in the past few months. Before he could stop himself, he reached over and touched her cheek lightly, and surprisingly, she leaned into his hand. He crept his hand over her cheek, and across her chin – her skin was fairly cold from the outside air, and it tingled when he touched it. After a few moments though, Boone realized that the others were still watching, and pulled away. "You look pale," she said. "And you need a haircut."

"Thanks, Shannon," he mocked hurt. "You look great, too."

"Thank you!" She chirped, ignoring his sarcasm. "So, introduce me to your roomies!" She took off her jacket, revealing a tight cashmere sweater that had a deep v-neck revealing subtle cleavage.

"I'm Ben," said Ben, smiling at her. Boone was glad that Ben was going to make this as normal as possible – he had made Ben promise never to mention what he had told him again. "This is Lilly, she'll be an unfriendly little bitch until she gets to know you." Lilly scowled at him, playfully pushing him away from her.

"That's _not_ true," she said. "Shannon, I'm Lilly," she stood up and shook Shannon's hand.

"I yelled at you!" Shannon remembered. "Sorry about that. I'm just a little overly protective of my Boone," She pulled Boone closer to her and kissed him on the cheek. "Isn't that right, Boone?" she murmured.

"Yeah," he said uncomfortably, trying not to let her behavior affect him. "And, uh, this is Becky," he introduced his sister to her.

"Hey," Shannon said coolly, her knowledge of the social hierarchy getting in the way of common etiquette. Shannon had a bitchy side to her, and he sometimes worried that it would overpower her. He nudged her, letting her know she was being rude. "Sorry," she smiled. "I'm Shannon. I've heard a lot about you." Boone _had_ expressed some concern about how lonely she was to Shannon over the phone.

"Really!" Becky exclaimed. "I mean… hi."

Just then, Ted emerged from doing god-knows-what in his bedroom. Shannon eyed him beadily, remembering Boone's unfavorable description. "Woah," he said, staring straight at her chest.

"You must be Ted," she smiled icily. "My face is right here, by the way."

"Right." He moved his eyes towards her hips. Boone rolled his eyes. "Who are you?"

"Shannon…" Then Ted discovered her legs.

"Dear lord," he muttered under his breath. "Why are you here?" He asked her.

"I'm Boone's sister…?"

"Oh right. His _sister_." Ted smirked. What did he know?

"There's something in your hair," said Shannon crassly.

"What?" Ted reached towards his long, tangled hair.

"Like a bird's nest or something…" she started. "Oh wait, that _is_ your hair."

"Bitch," Ted muttered, and retreated back into his room.

"Nice," Ben grinned.

"Well, now that we've met the lovely Ted…" Boone announced. "Actually, Shan, I have a surprise for you." He had saved up to buy them both tickets to see the New York City Ballet perform because he had felt guilty about not being able to attend her ballet show in California.

"What is it?" she asked.

"It's a _surprise_," he stressed the last word.

"Well… okay," she said dubiously. "Where should I put my stuff?" She motioned to her suitcase.

"Um," said Ben. "If you want, I can sleep on the couch for a few nights while you're here. You can use my bed, stay with your brother." Boone sighed in relief. _Ben was such a good friend_, he thought.

"Becky's going home for break tomorrow," Lilly said. "So Ben can just stay in her bed in my room after that."

Ben made a choking noise. "Really? Is that okay with you, Becky?"

"Yeah…"

"Just wash her sheets when you're done!" Lilly reminded him.

"Gross, Lilly, of course I'd – I mean, what are you suggesting?"

"That you're a filthy teenage boy, maybe?"

"What, like you're that clean!" He sneered. "I mean, I've seen those slippers you wear, can you say _nasty_?"

"You talk like a ditzy girl, Ben."

"At least I wash my clothes," he retorted.

"Shut up!" She squealed.

"Shut up!" Ben mimicked in an exaggeratedly high-pitched voice.

"They always act like this?" Shannon asked Boone.

"Pretty much." He took her luggage, which was practically overflowing, in typical Shannon manner. "Come on, let's get you settled in." She brushed up against him, following him closely into his dorm room. "We're alone now," she ventured cautiously when they got into his room.

"And?" He wondered what she was insinuating. Shannon wrapped her arms around his shoulders, burying her head into his neck. He returned to gesture, his hands around her waist. "I just missed you," she whispered in his ear. She pressed her lips into his neck softly, and he deepened the embrace, rocking her back and forth slowly. He had forgotten how warm she felt. He let himself relax into her touch.

Suddenly, Ben appeared in the doorway. "Oh!" He exclaimed awkwardly, and Boone pulled away from her quickly. "I just wanted to get my hairbrush," he said. "Sorry…"

"We were just hugging," Shannon shrugged, unable to see why Ben was acting so weird.

"Well – uh, we should get going," Boone said. "Especially if we want to go out to eat first."

At dinner, they caught up with each other. Shannon informed him of some new school gossip, complained about Sabrina, and raved about a kid's ballet class that she was helping to teach. Boone told her he was proud of her, and they let friendly, easy conversation flow throughout the meal. The ballet would have been a little bit dull for Boone, but Shannon was so excited, her face lit up animatedly throughout the whole thing, and the fact that he had pleasantly surprised her filled him with a warmth he couldn't describe.

When they got back, Lilly was watching one of her obscure independent movies on the TV in the living room. "Ben's with _Michelle_," Lilly noted, words dripping with disdain.

"What's the matter with Michelle?" Shannon asked.

"God… I dunno. She's just… ugh, not right for him!" Lilly complained. Boone was amazed that Ben and Lilly were unable to see what was in front of them. It was so obvious she liked him too.

"Oh," Shannon said. "I'm gonna go put on my pajamas," she told Boone. She came back out minutes later, wearing a lacey yellow camisole, his favorite color on her, and white sweatpants. The shirt showed off the smooth, tanned skin or her shoulders – skin that he longed to caress between his fingers. "Boone, you gonna come to bed soon?" She bit her lip.

"Yeah, coming." He wrinkled his nose as he watch the television screen in confusion. What the hell was Lilly watching? He turned around, wishing Lilly a goodnight, and followed Shannon into the dorm room.

"Aren't you gonna change?" She asked him expectantly, going over the sit on his bed.

"Yeah…" he said.

"So change then."

"Um…?" He motioned for her to give him some privacy.

"Oh come on, I've _seen_ you naked before." Boone gaped at her. "Remember, when we got drunk and went skinny dipping last summer?" Like he would ever forget that night. "I dunno, maybe you were too drunk to remember," she shrugged. Sure. Like hell he was.

Boone tentatively took off his shirt, ignoring Shannon's calculative gaze. "You need to tan," she announced.

"Yeah, in 30 degree weather in the middle of winter – they actually have _seasons_ here." He replaced the other shirt with a gray t-shirt, and took off his pants, but there was absolutely no way he was going to change his boxers with her there. He'd just have to wait until tomorrow. "Happy?" He asked.

"Wuss," she shook her head. "You disappoint me, Carlyle."

"You're being kind of weird," he said, though thoroughly enjoying her flirtatious behavior.

"Oh," she said, and Boone hoped he hadn't offended her. After they brushed their teeth, they lay down in separate beds, and he turned out the lights.

"Shan," he said after a moment.

"Yeah?" Her voice sounded small and vulnerable in the dark.

"You don't _really_ want to sleep in the bed of someone you know nothing about, do you?" He asked, a little mischief in his tone.

"No, I'd rather be with you." He scooted over to accommodate her, and she slid into bed with him, giggling as she cuddled close to him. She wrapped her arms around his neck, rolling onto her stomach and burying her face in his shoulder. He lay on his back, sliding his arms over her back, tickling down her spine. When they woke up, they were tangled in each other.

Over the next four days, Boone was the happiest he had ever been. He liked the new world he was living in, but without Shannon, it was hard to bear. With her here, it was almost as if his life was perfect – but during her stay they had definitely been pushing limits with little forbidden touches they hoped the others wouldn't notice. Shannon seemed to like New York too; one day, she dragged Boone shopping with her, but he would do anything just for her company.

She and Lilly got along okay, but they both had strong opinions that clashed, so they could never really get past the small talk stage in their relationship. Shannon and Ben seemed to get along well, but Shannon had made it pretty clear that she was here to see Boone, not to make friends. Ted didn't seem to understand this, and no matter how much Shannon expressed her disgust for him, he wouldn't take a hint and was constantly trying to hit on her. On her third night there, Shannon came to Boone's bed after brushing her teeth, informing him that Ted had told her she had "dick-sucking lips". Boone had seethed with anger, but Shannon told him that she had already "taken care of it". The next day, Ted was walking around with a considerable limp. Shannon never ceased to amaze him.

On Shannon's last night in New York, Lilly decided that they should all stay in the dorm and have a little bonding time. She referred to it as an "initiation ceremony" for Shannon, similar to the one that Boone and his dorm-mates had had during their first week at NYU. Ted had somehow acquired some alcohol again, but Boone decided he wouldn't be drinking tonight – he wanted to be on his best behavior for Shannon. Plus, he was beginning to feel a bit guilty for how often he had been intoxicated lately, and his pot-induced confession had been a mistake he wouldn't have made otherwise. Luckily, the mistake had seemed to resolve itself, but he didn't want to risk anything.

Ted usually considered himself too cool for the rest of the people in Boone's dorm, but Boone had a suspicion that he was only attending their little get-together so that he could look at Shannon. Maybe he hoped he could get her drunk and take advantage of her, but there was no way Boone was letting that happen. Another reason for him to stay sober.

"Ben and I are gonna go get some pizza," Lilly announced to them. Shannon and Boone were on the couch, watching some VH1 special that Boone wouldn't have ever watched if it weren't for Shan.

"Couldn't you just have it delivered?" Asked Ted from the kitchen.

"Um," said Ben. "It costs extra." But Boone knew that he just wanted an excuse to spend time with Lilly alone.

When they _finally_ got back, Shannon shut off the television, pulling her knees up to her chest and turning to face the others, who were sitting on the floor. "Who wants booze?" Ted asked. Shannon, Lilly, and Ben all took some.

"What Boone, you chicken?" Shannon asked, nudging him. "Just have a little." Boone wondered why she cared, but acquiesced, deciding he would only have one drink. Besides, he _was_ in college, so there was nothing wrong with having a little too much to drink every once in a while. Plus, he didn't want Shannon to think he was a prude.

As Shannon became more and more intoxicated, she started acting more and more anxious, scooting closer to Boone. Now, she was fidgeting with the hem of Boone's shirt, feeling the fabric between her fingers. She was much drunker than Boone, who was only slightly tipsy, but he wasn't going to stop her or anything. She was also leaning into his side, probably making the others quite suspicious. But he noted that Lilly and Ben looked a little suspiciously cozy as well.

"So Boone," said Ted. "I got one." They had casually been playing Truth or Dare.

"What?" Boone looked up, having been distracted by Shannon's antics.

"Kiss you sister." Boone nearly jumped at the opportunity. "Like, full-on."

"Ew, no," he tried to play it cool. The others looked on at him expectantly, but Ben's expression held more knowledge than the others. And he nodded slightly at Boone.

"Come on, Boone," she whined. "It'll be fun."

"Well… I guess…" he said.

Shannon tilted her head towards him, putting one hand in his hair. He pulled her closer, feeling awkward about the others watching, but this was Shannon, and he knew he couldn't resist her. And frankly, if he had an opportunity to kiss her, which he did, he was going to take it. Their lips met, and her lips were just as soft and smooth as he remembered. Her touch intoxicated him, as usual, making him almost unaware of his roommate's awed faces. He pulled away from her after a few seconds, but she pulled him back to her, kissing him again.

"Guys…" Lilly started, but trailed off when the others silenced her.

Their faces were both at a significant angle to his, and her nose matched up to the side of his. This time, she opened her mouth, and Boone skimmed his tongue over her lips, letting his hormones take control.

"Woah," said Ted, breaking the spell for a moment, but he was right back into it when Shannon started rubbing into the muscles on the back of his neck. He wrapped his arm around the back of her waist, letting her press her tongue against his, slowly and rhythmically. He kissed back, but his kisses were slower and more fervid than her drunken, playful kisses. Shannon shifted herself so that she was practically sitting in his lap, sighing with pleasure. She was smiling against his lips, and Boone tightened his grip, running his hand up and down her back as she rested her hands loosely around his wrists.

"Holy hell," Ben squeaked. "This is so – "

"Hot!" Ted interrupted. "God, this is even better than I expected!"

Boone was beginning to feel uncomfortable, but Shannon was clearly enjoying the attention, smirking slightly as she pressed her hand against Boone's chest. "Come on, don't be scared," she hissed in his ear. _What the hell_, he thought, and tickled up the side of her thigh, resting his hand on her waist, his thumb a little higher. He opened his mouth even further around hers, deepening the kiss. She moaned in recognition, just making Boone want her more. But it was Ben who eventually stopped them.

"Uh," he coughed. "Maybe it's someone else's turn now," he ventured. Shannon ignored him, moving her lips to Boone's ear, kissing it softly. Boone shuddered under her touch, but he knew that if they went any further, he wouldn't have the power to say no. He pulled back, and she reluctantly moved away from him, her eyes still fixed on him. Oh god, she just _had _to want him… but then Boone remembered that she must be pretty wasted to be behaving in this manner.

Shannon giggled shyly to the others. "Well, that was new," she slurred. Boone raised his eyebrows, but he knew better than to argue. He wanted her more now than ever, but as usual, there was nothing he could do about it. He looked at the group, noticing that Ted's mouth was still wide open in awe, and Ben looked a little anxious himself. Lilly looked somewhere between disgusted and captivated. "Come on you guys, it was a dare!" Shannon exclaimed.

"Yeah, it's not like we've ever done that before," Boone lied. Shannon gave him a meaningful look, and tossed him a pillow from the couch.

"Might wanna hide that," she mouthed, and Boone realized what she was trying to say. He turned bright red instantly, and grabbed the pillow to himself quickly. Thankfully, none of the others seemed to notice that part of their little exchange.

"A brother and sister swapping spit," Ted said. "I never knew incest could be so hot."

"Shut up, Ted," Lilly rolled her eyes. "You started it."

"No one started it," Ben tried to calm her down.

"Oh go screw your girlfriend," she spat, rubbing her eyes.

Boone tuned out their argument, still feeling restless about what had just happened. He knew it was just a game. But the level of unadulterated desire he had for her wasn't going to be sated by one kiss. He didn't think it would ever be sated.

Shannon fell asleep quickly and easily in his arms that night, but Boone stayed awake, watching her sleep, trying to capture the image in his mind and commit it to his memory. But when he woke up the next morning, he couldn't remember exactly how she had looked.

She wasn't in the best mood because she was hung-over, but she summoned the miniscule amount of energy she had to say goodbye to Boone. "I wish you could stay forever," he told her, hugging her deeply.

"I wish I could stay with _you_ forever," she sighed, hugging him back.

"Take care of yourself, okay?" He held her closer, her head resting on his shoulder.

"Boone," she pulled back a bit, tilting his chin up to face her. He looked back, confused. "Kiss me goodbye?" Boone looked back at her, confused. She rolled her eyes, fed up, and gave him a quick peck on the lips. "Bye," she walked towards the sidewalk, where a taxi was waiting to take her to the airport.

"Shan, wait," he grabbed her arm, pulling her to him again. He kissed again, this time tenderly and a little more intimate.

"'Love you," she smiled after he pulled away.

"Love you too," he said, his voice filled with passion and conviction.

"See you this summer!" She waved,shooting him a genuine smile, full of brightness and warmth, before she jumped into a taxi cab – he wouldn't see her for another five months.

* * *

_That chapter was **fun**, that's probably why I wrote it so fast! I even surprised myself how fast I wrote it. But that's probably because I'm going to be gone for like a month, all of July, and probably won't be updating much, if at all, for that time. I knew this chapter was long and I hope it wasn't too long for you.There was actually meant to be a scene where Boone gave Shannon a back massage, but Itook it out because it made this already huge chaptermonstrous. I'll put it in somewhere in the story though._

_Also, there's a Rules of Attraction reference in this chapter, wonder if anyone will catch it. ;) Please review guys – it only takes a click of a button! Thanks!_


	38. Chapter 38

_**Chapter 38**_

He was dreaming about her again. On the morning of his first day back in school, he lay in his bed, on his back, reflecting the events of his previous night's dream with a foolish smile on his face. He knew that he should be getting ready, and would probably be late for class, but he still let himself bask in the rays of his fleeting fantasy for a few more moments.

This semester, he had signed up for mostly the same classes, only in the next higher levels, except he had substituted Literary Interpretations with American Literature. At his mother's insistence, he was still going to continue to take Economics. When she told him, he had begrudgingly agreed, not wanting to start an argument. He hated disappointing people.

He was a little bit regretful that his freshman seminar was over, but he had enough on his plate without it. When he had talked to Sabrina, she had nagged him about picking a major, and for him to begin to pave his path in life. It was then he realized that he truly had no passion – there was nothing that he could think of that he enjoyed enough to pursue for a career. He had never really been enthusiastic about any particular sport or hobby. He had gone through high school half-heartedly completing assignments and activities. It hit him now that he only had room for one passion – and that passion was for Shannon. Now that he thought about it, nothing had the ability to excite or perturb him like she did. Shannon was to Boone what painting was to artists and what football was to professional football players. Shannon was what dictated the highs and lows of his daily emotions.

This information, when he had come upon it, hadn't really surprised him, but it certainly had made him think. He dug through his mind, trying to specify to Sabrina something that he might want to major in. He threw out, "psychology", but Sabrina had scoffed at the idea, saying that being a therapist, or "sitting around being paid to have conversations" wasn't a real profession.

"So basically you're saying that you won't be happy unless I major in business," he said. Sabrina has majored in business and built up her wedding design empire straight out of college, and she had always wanted Boone to follow in her footsteps. Boone had never taken the idea seriously, he had just thought that it would probably contribute to him being the butt of even _more_ gay jokes. He told Sabrina that he would consider majoring in business, but that he was going to finish his required graduation courses- or at least the rest of the semester, before choosing a major. She hadn't been too happy about this: "The term undeclared just sounds so unprofessional," she had said. But she begrudgingly allowed him to do so.

Boone allowed Sabrina to believe that he was her puppet, but the truth was, he wasn't. He knew that Sabrina needed to feel like she was in charge at all times, so he let her believe it. That was probably why her relationship with Shannon had failed, because they both wanted to be in charge. But Boone was okay with being the docile one in his relationship with Shannon – he didn't really have a choice.

Boone rolled out of bed, rolling his eyes at Ben, who was sound asleep, spread-eagled on the other bed. He took some clothes out of his drawer and took them to the bathroom, getting ready to shower. He took off his boxers, and stepped under the spigot, turning on the water. He liked to let the water heat up when he was already under it. That was, the first blast of water that sprayed over his body was frigid, and rejuvenated him from his sleepy morning haze.

After he got his hair wet, he washed his hair and body thoroughly. Then, with the sound of the water serving as a sound proofing device, he decided to put the memory of his dream to good use.

He closed his eyes, trying to replay the scenario in his head. "Shannon," he whispered to himself, thinking about her in the dream. Shannon… Shannon naked on his bed… This thought alone was enough to make him hard, and he started to arouse himself, working his hand against, further recreating the situation in his mind. He imagined how she had looked, and what she had been doing – kissing and touching and licking… he rubbed at himself more vigorously now. He hoped that no one was going to hear him, and that he had remembered to lock the door. He said her name again, trying not to get paranoid or distracted. Back to the dream. She had been kissing and touching and licking, lips passing over his ear, neck, chest and stomach… he shifted uncomfortably, remembering how he had been pulling the sheets away from her, letting his eyes graze over her as he caressed down the soft skin of her body. Boone ran his hand down himself again, whimpering slightly as he felt himself nearer to the edge. She had crawled on top of him, and he had pulled himself inside of her, thrusting in and out, in and out – in the shower he massaged even more deeply and intensely. He had felt her rocking against him, shuddering as she felt him inside of her. She had screamed "I love you," breathing raggedly…

"Shit," Boone groaned. "Fuck!" As he felt himself orgasm, the whole world disappeared. He sighed in exhaustion and fell back against the shower wall, nearly sliding to the tiled floor. He inhaled and exhaled slowly, watching the evidence wash down the drain. "Shit, Shannon," he said again, closing his eyes. After a few more seconds of resting, he reached for a bar of soap and washed his body again.

Suddenly, there was a loud knock on the door.

"Um, Boone?"

"Yeah?" He tried to regain a normal tone.

"This is Becky, I was just wondering if you were almost – "

"Dammit, Boone, I need to pee!" Ted exclaimed.

"And I need to get my contacts in," Lilly added. Boone wondered in dread how long they had been standing there.

"Okay, I'm almost out," he yelled back, humiliated. Masturbating first thing in the morning? Not the best idea, he decided. But that didn't mean he could stop himself.

The truth was, Boone had never jerked off thinking about anyone other than her. The first time he had done it, he had been fourteen, which was probably considerably older than most of his male peers. He had been invited to a friend of a friend's sleepover birthday party, and there they somehow had obtained this information from him, and made fun of him relentlessly about it. When he was about to leave, one of the boys had forced some dirty magazine into his hands, and that was when he decided it was time for him to do it. Just hours after he got home, he had locked the door of the bathroom, and turned the magazine to a page with the prettiest, bustiest girl in it – but it hadn't worked. Sure, he could get an erection from the girl on the page, but his mind kept reverting back to Shannon, the girl probably still sound asleep two rooms down the hall. He had thought about her romantically before and he had thought about kissing her, but he had never thought about her this overtly. He was still going through puberty, and still coming to terms with his feelings for her. Finally, he had flushed the magazine down the toilet, page by page so that no one would know he had ever touched it, and made it happen, a picture of Shannon in his mind. He felt extremely guilty about it the first time, as if he had completely soiled her honor, and tried not to think of her that way again, but night after night he found his hand straying between his legs as he thought about her while taking a shower, or while home alone on a Saturday night.

When he left the bathroom, he hoped that he was just being paranoid when he thought he noticed his roommates giving him weird looks. Surprisingly, he made it on time to his US History lecture, which he attended with Ben. He listened to the professor, and took impeccable notes as usual, though he found the current subject rather dull.

* * *

After the lecture, Boone and Ben went back to the dorm, where Ben was surprised to see his girlfriend Michelle waiting for him. She greeted him with a kiss, as Boone stood by awkwardly. He wondered why on earth Ben hadn't broken up with her, but it wasn't his business to intrude into his personal life. When Boone had told Ben about how he felt about Shan, Ben hadn't given him any preachy lectures, so Boone decided that he wouldn't either. "Boone," said Ben, after talking to Michelle quietly for a few moments, "Michelle and I are gonna go do something. We'll be back later, okay?"

"Fine," Boone shrugged. Boone went inside, and sat in the living room with his laptop, working on an essay. A few minutes later, Lilly arrived in the dorm.

"I just had the most thrilling Art History lecture," Lilly said sarcastically, plopping on the couch next to him. "How are you?" She kissed him on the cheek hello, as she usually did. "You look kind of upset."

"I'm okay," he looked up from his laptop and smiled at her. Apart from the usual war inside his brain he liked to call _Shannon_, it was true.

"What do you think Michelle and Ben are doing?" Lilly asked.

"I dunno," he said. "Don't really wanna think about it," he chuckled.

"Yeah, guess not. Can I – I mean, what do you think of her?"

"I don't really know her," Boone tried to be impartial.

"Yeah but… there's just something about her that seems really bitchy, you know? And Ben's so laid back," she paused. "It just doesn't seem… I don't know. I'll be quiet." Lilly pulled a book out of her book-bag and started reading.

It wasn't until late afternoon that Ben and Michelle arrived back to the dorm, each holding grocery bags. Michelle gave Boone and Lilly a lackluster greeting.

Lilly scooted a little closer to Boone. "Hey Michelle," her voice dripped with faux-sweetness. "Hi Ben."

"Hey," Ben replied, nodding towards both of them, but only looking at Lilly. Lilly scooted even closer to Boone, and Boone started to wonder what she was doing.

"What are you writing?" She asked, her head almost on his shoulder. Ben eyed them beadily.

"Lilly," Boone whispered, so that Ben wouldn't hear. "Is there a reason why you're using me to make Ben jealous?" Lilly flinched away.

"I wasn't – I mean," but her incoherent stuttering made it quite clear that that had been exactly what she doing. Boone rolled his eyes at her, letting her know that he wasn't angry, but that he didn't want it to happen again. Ben and Michelle had been talking in the kitchen area, unloading the groceries they had purchased.

"I'll be back in a second," said Ben, leaving to go to the bathroom.

"Yeah, I'm gonna go too," said Lilly. "Get some coffee or something." She put on her coat and left almost immediately. Boone sighed, trying to concentrate on his essay.

"So," said Michelle loudly, and plopped down on the couch next to him. Boone looked up from his computer, raising his eyebrows at her.

"So…" he said uncomfortably, not knowing what she was implying.

"Did you and your sister have a good visit?" She referred to Shannon's visit last week.

"Yeah," he attempted a smile, but her behavior was confusing him. "Did Ben tell you?"

"You could say that," Michelle said coldly. "So, what did you guys do?" Her voice seemed haughty, even disdainful. "Like, normal brother-sister things? Go out to eat, talk, hang out?"

"Yes?" He was being purposely guarded, and was beginning to see what Lilly had pointed out. There was something undeniably fishy about this girl.

"Channeling _Flowers in the Attic_?" She said, her tone interrogational.

"Wh-what?" Boone was pretty sure she was referring to the highly incestuous book he'd had to read for his Literary Interpretation class last semester. Had Ben told her? How could he do that to him? "What the hell are you talking about?"

Michelle smiled icily, and slowly stood up, looking victorious. "You know I think that's pretty sick."

Just then, Ben reappeared from the bathroom. Boone felt a storm of fury rage inside of him as he saw Ben's carefree face. "What's going on?" He asked.

Boone stood up, walking close to Ben. "What the fuck is your problem?" He spat, his anger and conviction resonating in his tone. Before Ben could respond, Boone stormed into his dorm room, slamming the door behind him. He tried to take at least some sort of pride when he heard Michelle and Ben yelling from behind his closed door, but he didn't. Instead, he felt a sinking nausea, a feeling that gnawed at his stomach whenever he thought about the abnormality of his feelings for Shannon. He put his head in his hands, and tried to prevent tears from falling down his face.

A few minutes later, he heard Michelle yell something, and storm out of the door. Boone heard the door handle of his bedroom ease open, and he knew it was Ben at the door. "You _promised _me!" He exclaimed, looking up at him, trying to sound angry but just sounding weak instead.

"Boone, let me explain. I didn't – "

"Oh, to hell I'll let you explain! I trusted you with my biggest secret, and you can't even – " he yelled.

"Would you shut up?" Ben interrupted. "I didn't _say_ anything, so I would appreciate it if you wouldn't just jump down my throat!" Boone glared at him. "Look. I told her that your sister was in town, and she says she saw you two at dinner acting like girlfriend and boyfriend. I don't know. Then I guess she heard about when you guys made out – "

"It was – " he started, but Ben cut him off again.

"I _know_, Boone! Just let me finish!" Ben said in irritation. "She didn't know that it was for a game, or that you were drunk! That's all she heard, _okay_? A rumor was started or something and it got mistaken, which happens! It's not my fault though, alright?" Boone looked at Ben. It appeared that he was telling the truth – his eyes were sincere and he seemed genuinely distressed.

"I believe you," Boone shrugged, still not quite ready to completely trust him.

"If it makes you feel any better, we just broke up."

"That doesn't make me feel any better," he said. "But she was pretty bitchy to me."

"Yeah, I realized that. I told her I didn't appreciate her treating my friends like shit, and then lying to me about it. That's part of the reason why I dumped her."

"But I bet there was another reason," Boone said, mischief glinting in his eyes.

"Well, yeah," Ben allowed. "I don't want her to think she's my rebound or anything. I mean, at risk of sounding totally cheesy, I've _never_ felt like this, you know? I mean, I think about her all the – " He stopped talking right as he heard the door to the living room close. "I think she's back."

"Guys?" Lilly announced, surprised that neither of them were in the living room anymore.

"Yeah, in here," Boone replied. Lilly walked into their room, standing in the doorway, when she seemed to realize that Ben looked unhappy.

"What happened?" She asked suspiciously. "Ben, you okay?" She went towards him, kissing him hello, just like she always did. "What's the matter?" She kissed him on the cheek again.

"Would you quit kissing me?" Ben said, though good-naturedly. "Michelle and I just broke up."

"Oh, I'm _sorry_," she cooed. "Come on, let me make you some hot chocolate."

"Yes, mother," Ben said, following her into the kitchen. Boone smiled. If only all relationships could be that easy.

Over the next few days and weeks, life at New York University passed routinely like this, the humdrum of assignments, essays, and tests mixed with the turmoil of his friends made the time fly by. Before Boone knew it, the month of January was already over.

_Well, so much for no updates while I'm in Florida. But I'm visiting my grandparents, and let's face it – old people aren't exactly a thrill a minute. So I wrote a chapter. Hope you liked it! Review please! _


	39. Chapter 39

_**Chapter 39**_

Boone was walking down the busy streets of New York City one cool February afternoon after visiting an art exhibit that none of his friends had seemed interested in spending their Saturday at. So he went by himself, unbothered by the fact that he was alone. He had lived in such close quarters with his roommates for such a long time, and sometimes it was good to get away. The exhibit itself had been interesting enough, a study of famous black and white photographers, and now Boone was looking like any native New Yorker, wearing a black coat and drinking heinously overpriced coffee in a Styrofoam cup. There were lots of people around, enjoying the mild weather on their weekend, but Boone did a double-take as one girl walked by.

The flash of red-brown hair that flashed by was artfully messy in a way that made it look like she had just had rolled out of bed after having sex, was strangely familiar. That was when he realized that it was Anna, Shannon's best friend, and the girl he had lost his virginity to. They had had _some_ attraction, but when it came to a long-term relationship, they were totally incompatible; she was needy and dramatic, and he was laid-back and immersed in other things – other people… well, he was immersed with Shannon.

"Anna!" He exclaimed. Even though things hadn't worked out, he still felt a bond to her that wasn't just because of their previous experiences together. Boone figured it was because of her close connection to Shannon. Anna stumbled over her shoe, which was, in predictable Anna fashion, a black stiletto boot, and quickly turned around, trying to decipher where the sound had come from. "Anna!" He walked towards her.

"Oh my god!" She squealed. "Boone!" She stood awkwardly in front of him, an eager smile on her face. Should he hug her? He decided that he may as well, but found himself holding on longer than he had expected to. She smelled like California. Like Shannon.

"Hey!" He said warmly. "What are you – what are you doing here?"

"I have a shoot," she twirled her hair around her finger nervously. Boone had never seen her display anything but obnoxious self-confidence, so this was a new side to her. Maybe Shannon had been right, when she said that she had changed. The old Anna had been known for her lack of tact and superior knowledge of cuss words. "It was yesterday, but I decided to stay the weekend. I can't believe I ran into you, though!" She exclaimed.

"Yeah, what are the chances?" He was genuinely surprised, and truly happy to see her. "I mean, millions of people in New York, and we happen to be in the same place at the same time."

"Must be fate!" She laughed, rolling her heavily lined eyes. Now that was more like the Anna he remembered.

"So, uh…" he started weakly. "Wanna go get some coffee?" He offered her a smile.

"Looks like you already got some," she noted.

"Oh," he looked at his empty coffee cup. "Well, wanna get some more?"

"Sure," she smiled. "You lead the way, New York boy." He led her to a nearby coffee house, a small little run-down place, _never_ Starbucks, which many of the art freaks at NYU frowned upon intensely. The place was crowded, so after they ordered, he took her arm and led her to a table, where they sat down. "So this is where all of the intellectuals hang out?" She prompted, naïve.

"I don't that much," he admitted. "But the intellectuals and the art um," he lowered his voice, "freaks, do."

"Oh," she nodded, right as their order was called. Boone went and got their coffees, deciding it would be nice to pay, and sat back down. "Thanks for paying," she thanked him. "So, how do you like it here?" She asked him when he got back.

"I like it. I like being away from Sabrina, but I don't like being away from – "

"Shannon," they said simultaneously. An awkward pause followed. She looked at him, biting her lip nervously, and then looked away. Their relationship had concluded partially because Anna had called him on being in love with Shannon.

"Do you still…? Like, it's okay if you do." To a bystander, her question would have been incoherent, but they both knew what she was talking about.

"Yeah…" he looked down at his coffee mug, turning it around on its saucer. "Still do. Are you still mad at me?"

"I never really was. Well, I _was_ a little at first, just cuz, you know, I really sorta fell for you," she laughed self-deprecatingly. "But then I was okay about it. I'm sure it's worse for you, it must hurt a lot to feel that way about someone…"

"Someone you can't have," he finished.

"Exactly," she nodded, the mood of the conversation shifted. Then she suddenly broke into a grin. "It did kind of suck though, having you as my first, now nothing quite measures up!"

"S_ucked_, huh?" He said immaturely, looking up dreamily, though he was only joking around with her.

"Shut up, Boone," she laughed, playfully pushing his arm. "I can't be held accountable for things I did when I was drunk, okay?"

"You weren't _always_ drunk… only usually." He smiled innocently. "But you were like obsessed with my – "

"And now I'd say _you're_ drunk!" She interrupted him, somewhere between completely humiliated and cracking up. They finished their coffees, and stood up, walking back outside into the colder air. "So…" she said. "Uh, nice seeing you?"

"Yeah, it was nice." He said kindly. "Um, bye?" He pulled her in for a hug, which somehow turned into a kiss, though it was still fairly platonic. She stepped back, giving him a final pat on the shoulder, and started to walk away. "Anna!" He called after her. Being near her was like being near Shannon, and it filled him with sentiment. She stopped and turned around to look at him, walking slowly back over to him.

"Yeah?" She said expectantly.

"You don't have to leave… yet…" he trailed off.

"Okay," she grinned. "What do you wanna do then?"

"I dunno," he smiled playfully. "What do _you_ wanna do?"

She raised her eyebrows, contemplating something in her head. "Wanna fuck?" She asked nonchalantly.

Had he misheard her? "Um, excuse me?"

"Do you want to have sex?" She said slowly, as if she were speaking to a retarded person.

He gaped at her, not sure whether she was joking or not. So he laughed uncertainly.

"I'm serious!" She blushed. "And now you're laughing! So much for that idea, then," she shrugged.

"Well…" he hadn't had sex in a really long time, and being any hormonal teenage boy, he wasn't completely turned off to the idea.

"Haven't you ever had casual sex before?" She asked him. "I mean, there wouldn't be any commitments or anything."

"Well, as long as we both know that…" he couldn't believe that he was actually considering this. "I mean, we have to be careful."

"Of course," she nodded eagerly. "So, you wanna?"

"I'm just… I mean, I can't guarantee that I won't say… that I won't say her name." He said quietly.

"That's okay," she shrugged. "I mean, we're just blatantly using each other for sex. Totally casual." She failed to see the irony in this statement.

Boone laughed. "I can't believe I'm agreeing to this." But he hadn't had sex in about a year, and he knew that sooner or later he was going to end up doing it. Better to do it with someone who understood the situation and knew him, he thought.

"My hotel's right down the street, so I guess we can just walk." This was beginning to sound sleazy. "Don't worry, it's like a 4-star hotel. I'm not talking about some seedy motel in the middle of nowhere," she seemed to read his mind. "Come on." She linked her arm in his and led him down the street.

When they reached the hotel, an ultra chic skyscraper in a sophisticated area of Manhattan, they walked through the marble entry-room and towards the elevators. The lady at the front desk gave him a reproachful look. Boone felt like dying. Why had he agreed to this, again? She pulled him inside the elevator and looked at him expectantly. "Your seduction style: nonexistent," she said blankly.

He rolled his eyes, and leaned over and kissed her on the cheek. She sighed, looking bored. So he kissed her on the neck. _To hell with it_, he thought, and faced her towards him, kissing her fully on the lips. He remembered how warm and inviting Shannon's lips had been a few weeks ago when she had visited, and deepened the kiss with Anna. When they reached their floor on the elevator, they were full-on making out. _Shannon, Shannon, Shannon_, he thought. She pulled back when the elevator door opened, because there were some other people standing in the hallway waiting to go down.

She used her key to open the door, and dropped her purse on the table in the foyer. The room was a large suite with lush carpeting and huge picture windows. He had stayed in numerous hotels like this, being from the same tax bracket as her. "Nice room," he said, walking into it and taking off his coat. She did the same, throwing it on the couch in the other room in front of the large screened television. Boone didn't like to be ostentatious about his wealth, but he had to admit he was pretty accustomed to hotel rooms like this.

"Yeah," she said distractedly, going towards the windows and closing the blinds. "A lot of the girls at the shoot couldn't afford it, so they're staying here. But they left this morning, so I have it all to myself!" She explained.

"Cool," he said. "What was the shoot for?"

"This magazine spread about summer fashions and make-up and stuff. Wearing a swimsuit in 40 degree weather? Not so fun." She wrapped her arms around Boone's waist, kissing him softly. "You're really hot," she noted.

"So are you." Though she wasn't as pretty as Shannon, in his opinion. To him, Shannon was pure and beautiful and gorgeous, but Anna was just hot. Even though they didn't look too much alike, it was still fairly easy to pretend she was her. Their characteristics were similar because they had spent so much time together growing up.

He kissed her on the lips, opening his mouth around hers. They made out for a few moments, and Anna slid her hand between them, as he crept his hand up under her shirt, rubbing his hand against her chest. "Screw this," she said, pulling away, and quickly unbuttoned his pants and unzipping them, kneeling in front of him on the floor.

Boone let her pull down his boxers, and start touching him. When she licked him, he sighed in appreciation. "So, uh," she said, licking down it again. "What were you doing in the touristy part of New York today?"

"I was at a…" she continued to suck. "An art museum."

"Oh. And why were you at an art museum?" She pulled back for a moment so she could talk, but then went right back to it. He found it a bit odd that they were having a conversation right now.

"Cuz I felt like it," he struggled to say.

"How long has it been since you're had sex?" She asked.

"Like, a while," he said, enjoying what she was doing. "Damn, that feels good."

"How long is a while?"

"Like, a year or something." She let go of him, shocked.

"A _year_? Looking like you, and you haven't had sex in a year?"

"Dammit, Anna! Don't stop!" He said, a little whiny.

"Sorry," she sucked a little more. "Is that good?"

"Yeah, really good," he closed his eyes. "Can you do it a little, uh, higher too?"

"Yeah," she obliged. He clenched his fists together. "Have you come close to doing it in a year?"

"You know… the only people I've ever had sex with are you and Erin."

"Erin had sex with you?"

"Yeah, for a while. But then she went all pseudo-religious and…" He trailed off as she sucked with more vehemence. "Shit."

"Well, are you guys at least on good terms?"

"Um, no." He paused, struggling to multi-task.

"I'm glad that we're on good terms," she rested her hand on his upper thigh, continuing to arouse him. At the moment, he was pretty damn glad they were on good terms, too.

Suddenly he remembered something he'd been meaning to ask her. "Whatever happened to you and Kevin?" He referred to one of his friends from high school.

"Oh, him." Anna licked over it again. "Oh, well, mainly we just smoked a lot of weed and had sex a lot." She shrugged. "We didn't think it was worth it to try to have a long distance relationship or anything." She cocked her head to the right, and sucked at him from a different angle, very lightly skimming her teeth against him. He clenched his fists tighter, feeling himself getting close.

"Hey, should I swallow or dodge it?" She asked, as if she were asking if he wanted salad or fries with that.

"Whatever you want," he strained to get the words out. When her lips touched him again, he was again reminded of Shannon, though her lips had never touched a place so intimate. "Shannon," he found himself say under his breath. "Fuck, Shannon…" he moaned. "Anna," he corrected himself, and then he came.

She pulled away, and Boone saw a flicker of disappointment cross her face. She sat back on her knees, getting ready to stand up again.

"Sorry?" He apologized for saying Shannon's name.

"It's totally okay. I said it was okay, so it's okay." She didn't sound so sure.

After they had cleaned themselves up, and Boone had calmed himself down from the experience, he decided to take full advantage of her being there, and kissed her again, pulling off her shirt, as she coaxed him onto the bed.

Afterwards, she fell asleep, but he found that he was unable to because it was the middle of the afternoon. He went to the bathroom and took a shower, trying to dry his hair with a towel as completely as possible. When Anna woke up, she also took a shower, and then he asked her if she wanted to go back to his dorm to meet his roommates.

* * *

When they got back to the dorm, the only people there were Lilly, and Rebecca, who as usual was locked up in her room. He could also tell that Ted was in his room, the usual death metal music thumping from it. He didn't know where Ben was. "Hey," he said to Lilly when he arrived. Lilly was in the kitchenette, washing dishes.

"Hey, Boone," Lilly came over and kissed him on the cheek. "Hi!" She greeted Anna. "Who are you?"

"I'm Anna," Anna shook her hand, surprisingly friendly and polite.

"This is Lilly," Boone introduced her. "She's one of my _favorite _roommates and friends. Lilly, this is Anna, she's my, um," he tried to figure out what she was. Friend? Maybe. Ex-girlfriend? Well, technically, but that sounded mean. "Um… this is Anna." He tried to correct himself. "She's a friend?"

"Oh! I've heard about you! You're his ex-girlfriend, right?" Lilly asked. It must have come up in a conversation at some point.

"Yeah," she said. "So." There was an extremely awkward silence.

"Why's your hair wet?" Lilly asked Boone.

"I took a shower," he said without thinking.

"Um, somewhere else?" She looked perplexed. "And your hair's wet too…" she gasped, faux-dramatic. "Boone! Did you guys…?" They looked at her guiltily.

Just then, they heard someone in the hallway, presumably Ben, nearing the door. Lilly looked at Boone and Anna reproachfully, and then ran into the hall to meet him. "Have you met Boone's hot nympho fuck-buddy?" They overheard her say loudly.

"We're standing right here, you know," Boone announced, hoping Anna's feelings wouldn't be hurt. But instead, he heard her snicker loudly.

"Oh my god," she laughed as Ben and Lilly arrived back in the room. "That is… the most perfect description of me I've ever heard!"

"Um, thank you?" Lilly said. "I was more expecting to be bitch-slapped, but that works, too." She tapped Ben on the shoulder. "Ben, this is Anna, Boone's hot nympho fuck-buddy!" She said confidently.

"Pleased to meet you," Anna rolled her eyes, shaking Ben's hand.

"And Anna, this is Ben, one of me and Boone's best friends."

Suddenly, Ted practically exploded into the room, looking supremely disheveled. "Did someone just say the words hot, nympho, and fuck in the same sentence!" He exclaimed, breathless.

Anna raised her eyebrows. "Um, hello to you too?"

Ted took one look at her. "You're her. You're the hot nympho."

"You're kind of frightening me?" Anna said, bewildered.

"Don't mind him, he's just an idiot," Lilly said, leading her away from him. Ted gaped at her.

"Boone," Ted said. "You're my new favorite roommate."

"Thanks?" Boone questioned.

"Did you discover some new drug or something?" Lilly asked. "You're acting even weirder than usual."

"N-no," Ted stuttered. "I gotta go," and with that, he disappeared into his room.

"And that little interlude was brought to you by Ted Darby," Lilly announced. "Druggie/slacker extraordinaire."

"I figured," Anna smiled. "Hey, you guys wanna go eat? I'm really hungry, and it might be fun." She shrugged.

"Um," Ben looked uncertain. "If you don't mind the school cafeteria?"

"We should invite Becky," Boone said. Not only did he feel sorry for her, but he didn't want it to seem like a double-date.

"Okay," Lilly said. Boone excused himself to go find Becky, who was in her room, and led her into the living room.

"Becky," he said, "This is Anna. And Anna, this is Becky."

"Hey," Anna shook Becky's hand. "How are you?"

"I'm good," Becky looked suddenly angry. "Um, how do you know Boone?"

"Well, he's my ex. But we're still friends, right?"

"Yeah." Boone rolled his eyes. "_Friends_."

Ben's sneeze that followed sounded suspiciously like the word "benefits". Boone ignored him.

"So we were gonna all go eat," Anna said warmly. "Wanna come?"

"Sure," Becky replied, surprising all of them.

They all went to dinner to eat the mediocre cafeteria food that had sustained them for the past six months. By the time they were done eating, Anna and Lilly had managed to bond over similar tastes in music, movies, and senses of humor. Becky seemed to take an instant dislike to Anna, and Boone wasn't sure why.

By the time they got back, it was pretty late, and Boone was, for obvious reasons, beat. Now they were all standing by the door, bidding Anna goodbye. Anna gave Lilly a huge hug like they had been best friends forever. "You have to call me!" She told her.

Lastly, Anna gave Boone a soft kiss on the cheek. "If I'm ever in town again, I'll give you a call, and we can… figure something out," she muttered in his ear. "Bye."

* * *

Right before Boone was going to go to bed, he heard his cell phone ringing. The caller ID informed him that it was Shannon calling. Excited to talk with her, Boone picked up the phone. "Hello?"

"You and Anna had sex!" Shannon nearly shouted.

"Hello to you too, Shannon," He replied. "Did she tell you?"

"No, Sabrina did." Shannon dead-panned.

"No she – did she really?"

"Duh, no, Boone, you're so gullible. Now answer my question: Did you and Anna engage in sexual intercourse today?"

"Well, like, I mean…" he tried to get around answering the question. "Yes."

"Why the fuck did you do _that_?" She sounded somewhere between completely furious and mildly amused.

"You know why." It had been the closest he could get to having sex with _her_.

"No, I don't, really."

"Shannon, look! I don't' have to share every bit of personal information about my life, okay?" He said, defensive. "We did it because we felt like it."

"Fine."

"Fine," he replied stubbornly.

Shannon giggled. "That's funny."

"Why?"

"It just is." She answered. "Boone and Anna, sitting in a – "

"Shut up! We're not back together or anything like that! I mean, God no."

"Well, good. I didn't like you guys together."

"Neither did I," he said honestly. "But she does seem a lot nicer and more mature."

"Yeah, she does. All the more reason to have random sex with her."

"Yup."

"Well, okay, I was just calling to berate you."

"Sure you were."

"Well, like I said, I'm just protective of you. No one touches my Boone unless I say they can," she joked.

He smiled. "Shan, I'm really tired. Can we talk tomorrow?"

"Sure," she replied. "But not too early. I have to beat Anna to a pulp first."

"Okay," he laughed. "Don't be too hard on her, though. I wasn't exactly arguing."

"'Right, Boone. I love you."

"'Love you, too." He shook his head, smiling slightly, and collapsed onto his bed. _Well, that was certainly an eventful day,_ he thought.

_ dodges bullets Okay, you all have full permission to kill me, gouge my eyes out, or beat me to a pulp. Even if you do that, though, reviews would be nice. I seriously hope the Boone/Anna stuff wasn't too terribly painful, I know everyone hates her (or dislikes her) except me and my one ally Summerith. But I just couldn't help myself! And Boone needed sex. doesn't even bother dodging the rest of the bullets Erm, please review even if it is just to tell me how horrible and deserving of death I am. _


	40. Chapter 40

_**Chapter 40**_

Okay, so he had been slacking off, he admitted. He had been substituting studying for aimless walks around campus, hanging out in coffee shops, going to lame parties, and spending hours composing letters to Shannon, only to throw them away when he finished. But slacking wasn't going to cut it now that finals were around the corner. Imagining Sabrina's wrath when she found out about his grades was enough to motivate him to lock himself into his dorm room for approximately a week, organizing assignments, actually _doing_ the reading he was supposed to months ago. Now, it was his fifth day of nonstop studying, and his mood was much like a girl suffering from PMS.

Shannon had always been a moody person, so when her time of the month arrived, her mood swings were monstrous. He actually remembered when she had first gotten her period, because she had immediately called all of her friends, proudly announcing that she was now a woman. But her pride dissipated later that day, and in the months to come, when she began suffering from severe cramps. Boone had begun to suffer from her horrible treatment of him for a week each month. He remembered that when she was about fourteen, Shannon and Boone had been dragged along to one of Sabrina's functions at a rich client's home, and Shannon had worn a white sundress, only to discover when she got there that her period had indeed arrived and stained the dress in question. Sabrina didn't notice that Shannon had been absent for at least an hour, but Boone eventually found her in the host's backyard, sitting in the grass, in tears. Her tears had been what convinced Boone to drive Sabrina's car to the drugstore without his learner's permit and purchase Shannon some pads. It was probably one of the top three most embarrassing experiences in his life – he still remembered the strange look the clerk had given him like it was yesterday.

But there was no time to think of such things now. He had five finals to cram for, and his Economics final was tomorrow. He had a different Economics professor this semester, and she was probably the most demanding teacher he had ever had. When they weren't reading or doing calculations, they were writing essays, and when they weren't writing essays, they were doing projects or pulling all-nighters to study for a test that randomly accounted for 50 of their grade. Well, everyone except for Boone. He had been slacking, and the test in question had brought his grade down to a disappointing straight C. He had calculated, for the sheer purpose of procrastination, that he had to get a ninety-four on the final in order to come out with a B. In order to survive the summer with his mother, that is.

But there was definitely one thing that was motivating Boone. He knew that after he finished finals, he could go home and spend the summer with Shannon. But a part of him worried that she would be busy hanging out with her many friends all summer, and not have time for her boring older brother. These insecurities were fogged over by his impending tests, though. Boone looked around his sullen dorm room, painted in a variety of shades of gray. He decided that it was time for a change of scenery, and with his textbook and piles of disorganized assignments, he moseyed into the kitchen, and sat at the cheap Formica table. He rolled his eyes upon seeing Lilly's half-empty box of Froot Loops sitting at the table. He wasn't sure where Lilly was at the moment – now that he thought about it, he didn't know where any of his roommates were. But it was a safe bet that Becky was holed in her room, as usual. Of his roommates, Becky was by far the most studious, but she was also the most hermitic. He shrugged, and began going over the book, once again skimming his eyes over information that he was positive he could not memorize in the next – he checked his watch – 20 hours.

* * *

A few hours later, Boone decided that he was due for a break, so went to the nearest coffee shop to get himself some French Vanilla, his favorite kind of coffee, that, Shannon had told him, was 'wuss coffee'. After enjoying a leisurely four minute break, he headed back to his dorm. Ted was in the kitchen, riotously rummaging through the cupboards. "Cheez-it's!" Boone heard him mutter.

"Ted?" Boone ventured. "Are you okay?" Munchies.

"Do we have any cheez-it's!" Ted exclaimed, eyes wild. He approached Boone, and Boone was honestly frightened for his life.

"We have finals tomorrow, shouldn't you be studying instead of getting sto – " But Boone was unable to finish his sentence because just then, Ted leaned over and threw up. "What the fuck, man?" Boone cried, near tears. Ted had managed to puke all over Boone's Economics notes. "Shit! What the hell is your bloody fucking problem? Now because of you, I'm probably going to fucking fail! God damnit! Clean this up, you bastard!" In retrospect, Boone realized that he had probably never sworn so much in two sentences. But for now he was too upset to think about that. "Fuck you!" He yelled, and left the dorm building, slamming the door behind him in a decidedly cliché gesture.

The next day, he survived his Economics final, but he was almost positive he wouldn't be able to scrape a B in the class. He wholly blamed this fact on Ted, though he was sure he wouldn't have been able to even if that idiot _hadn't_ puked on his notes.

The next few days, he also managed to pull two more all-nighters, thanks to his friends coffee and Visine, and was feeling pretty positive about the outcomes. He actually breezed through his American Literature final in half the time allotted, and then promptly plopped onto the couch on his dorm floor's common room and fell asleep instantly. When he woke up, there was a homely girl sitting next to him, staring at him. Awkwardly, he stood up and bolted out of the dorm.

As he walked up the stairs, he pondered his schoolwork. Luckily, it was Friday, so he had all weekend to study for his Sociology 2B final. Boone started down his hall. He was a firm believer that no studying should take place on Fridays, especially when it was May, and even in obscenely industrialized New York City, spring had sprung. Lilly had told him that April and the beginning of May was the only time New Yorkers actually exhibited some politeness. Boone smiled to himself as he turned the key into his door. It was true; a cab driver had actually _smiled _at him and – but all logical thoughts were dispelled by what he saw next.

There, casually entwined on the couch, were Ben and Lilly. Lilly was in Ben's lap, and they were nonchalantly kissing, and they were so into it they didn't even notice Boone's existence. "Oh my god," Boone couldn't help but mutter. Not that he hadn't expected it, he had, just not when he was functioning on two hours of sleep and trying to escape from a strange girl who had been sitting over him when he woke up.

"Oh, woah," Ben finally noticed that Boone was, indeed, a human. Lilly, on the other hand, didn't, and started to kiss Ben again. "No, Lil, wait – " Ben motioned for her to stop. Boone coughed.

"OH!" She exclaimed, moving a hand from Ben's hair to cover her mouth in shock. "This wasn't exactly how you were meant to – " She trailed off. "This is fucking embarrassing." She slowly climbed off of Ben, fixing her hair clip, and sitting on the opposite side of the couch from him.

"We were going to tell you soon…" Ben said. "Seriously, we were just talking about that, and we were saying that we really should stop keeping this a secret, and – "

"How long?" Boone interrupted.

"Well, we first kissed like, in…"

"January? February?" Lilly finished, Boone gaped. He had been expecting something more along the lines of 'last week'.

"Why… I mean, you should have told me," were the words that came out of his mouth.

"I know, I'm sorry!" Lilly's face fell. "It's my fault, I was scared to for some reason."

"It's not your fault," Ben told Lilly sympathetically. "It's my fault; you're my best friend, it was my responsibility and I kept telling her I would tell you. At least this way we don't have to go through the trouble of telling you, right?" He attempted a joke. No one laughed.

"Well," Boone shrugged. "Congratulations. I mean, I always thought you'd be good together."

Lilly's eyes widened. "You aren't mad?"

"Why would I be mad? I mean, caught off guard, yes, but not mad. I'm really happy for you."

"Well, that's good." Ben nodded uncomfortably. "We weren't expecting you for a while. We wouldn't have been in the living room anyway."

"Who wants Thai food?" Lilly changed the subject. "I know a really good take-out place."

Everyone looked at Lilly, relieved. "Yeah, sure." Boone replied. "Pad Thai sounds really good right now."

Boone went to bed that night, full of Pad Thai, wondering when, and if, he would ever find someone like Ben had found Lilly. But he didn't want to find anyone else. He just wanted Shannon.

_I am sooooooooooo sorry, you guys. It's been forever! And I said I would update while I was at the writing program, but I didn't… I was really really preoccupied with other things while I was there, but I know I promised, so for that I'm sorry. But I promise the next update will come sooner if I get more reviews, which will motivate me. Thanks you guys, and again, I apologize. _


	41. Chapter 41

_**Chapter Freakin' Forty-One**_

It was 8:57 AM the day before he went home. The day before he got to see Shannon, her glowing eyes and smooth skin and soft red lips, the day before he got to hear her easy laugh and quick smile, and feel her warmth near him. But he couldn't get ahead of himself – he had his Sociology Final in approximately three minutes.

Currently, he was sitting in the classroom, flipping through his notes before the Professor arrived to proctor the exam. But he couldn't concentrate because he was so anxious to see her. He kept picturing her face in his head when he was supposed to be studying moral philosophy. But he was confident that the test wouldn't be too much of a cause for stress. His grade in the class currently was a solid B, so he would have to completely bomb the test in order for it to drop to a dreaded C. But looking around the room, he decided that maybe he _should_ be more nervous. Many of his classmates were frantically reading through notes, appearing harried and under the influence of a ridiculous amount of caffeine – the guy next to him was muttering words from his stack of flashcards, which was nearly the size of Boone's head. Under a normal situation, the kid would probably be receiving some strange looks from the obnoxious New Yorkers surrounding him, but in this situation, Boone was getting the weird looks for not appearing more anxious.

Lilly was in his class, and she was sitting about three seats away from him, also sorting through a deck of flashcards. He examined her from where he was, and although she too seemed to be functioning on an obscenely low amount of sleep, she looked surprisingly content. Her brown hair was set in an unruly half-ponytail, and locks of her hair fell into her face – she didn't even bother tucking them away behind her ears where they wouldn't block her vision; her cheeks were naturally blushed. She glanced at Boone quickly, feeling his watchful eye, and smiled uncomfortably. Boone looked away, not sure why he had been staring in the first place.

But he figured it out. Truth was, he had never seen her look so happy, so healthy… so loved. He felt a pang of jealousy – no, wistfulness, she was the picture of something he could never have. Loving Shannon would never be something he was allowed to do – so he knew that he could never have an effect on Shannon like Ben had had on Lilly. He was definitely happy for him, but he wanted something like that for himself. So badly. Much more than he wanted to make an A on his Sociology –

Just then, the atmosphere of the room changed as Professor Trumbole arrived into the room. She wasn't an especially daunting looking woman: middle aged, short, chubby and dressed in various shades of blue, but her presence was strong enough to make people realize that this was the moment in which all their notes had to go away and information had to be retained in their minds only. It was interesting for Boone to look at people who were really, really depending on the outcome of this exam. Boone wasn't depending on that. He was depending on Shannon, and how she would treat him upon his arrival.

"Good morning," Professor Trumbole said smoothly. "All notes should be put away and out of site. This exam should last on average about two and a half hours, but you may leave the room as soon as you have completed both parts." She took a breath, eyeing a few students who were putting their study sheets into their bags. "I'd like to reiterate that the first part of the test is standardized and worth 20 percent of your exam. The essay is worth 80 percent of the exam. The exam itself is worth 40 percent of your grade." Boone nodded, fingers itching to begin the test. Luckily, he had always been better at essays than multiple choice and true or false. He couldn't write poetry or some creative story for his life, but when it came to persuasive or analytical essays, it was a breeze. Although by the looks on his classmates' faces, he realized he might be being a bit overly confident.

One of the TA's passed out the multiple choice form, and Boone filled out his personal information on it. The packet of questions was distributed next. "Remember not to write on the question sheets." Most of the students were already scanning the questions, not paying any attention to this obvious bit of information. "When you've completed that part, you may pick up the essay question from the podium up front." She motioned towards her podium. "You have until noon to complete both parts. You may begin, and good luck."

Even though Boone's mind was stuck about a day in the future, he forced himself to carefully analyze each question before answering. He was anxious to finish the test, but he found that the multiple choice questions were harder than he had imagined. In high school, everyone breathed a sigh of relief when teachers informed them tests would be multiple choice, but in college, the professors twisted the questions into the trickiest ways so that it was harder than the most difficult possible essay question. This test definitely proved that fact. He finished the first part in about an hour, and then went on to complete the essay, which, again was more difficult than he had expected. He left the testing room with a grim expression on his face even though he knew he still probably wouldn't break his B average, and ambled to his dorm room to start packing.

-----------------------------------------------------

It had never really occurred to Boone how much shit he really had. After packing up all his clothes, the bathroom stuff he didn't need for tomorrow, and his laptop, he discovered his bedside lamp. Once he took care of that, he remembered the microwave he had brought. He was sufficiently confident that he had packed everything when he passed by the notorious blueberry coat, which he also had to stuff into his bag. Whilst doing so, he noticed a pair of Chuck Taylor's that for most certainly not his. He carelessly threw them towards Ben's bed, and that was when he heard a yelp, alerting him that he had, indeed, thrown them at Ben himself, who was also having just a hellacious time packing. "Shit, man," he groaned. "This sweater is yours, I'd never wear something so fucking feminine." He rolled his eyes and threw said sweater square on Boone's head.

When they believed they had sufficiently packed away their things into suitcases, everyone met in the living room, and they decided to order Thai food and spend the evening reminiscing. They did just that, and by 1 AM Lilly had fallen asleep in Ben's lap, a carton of Thai in her lap, and Becky had retired hours before. Ted was still wide awake, making snide comments every once in a while. Boone decided to go to sleep, and fell asleep without trouble.

His last few hours at college as a Freshman passed all too quickly, and before he knew it he was on a taxi to the airport. He had lived in New York long enough to realize that there was no point in trying to converse with the drivers, they were too busy driving badly to talk. Boone himself was a bit anxious in the taxi, in the airport, and on the plane, anticipating when he was going to see Shan. He still wasn't sure how she would react- would she give him a big hug like last time? Would she even meet him in the terminal? Or would she be waiting at home for him? Or worse, at a party so he couldn't see her until tomorrow?

But after the undesirably long plane ride, his questions were answered. Boone was standing at the baggage claim waiting for his suitcases when two hands reached over and covered his eyes. "Guess who?" Shannon's voice whispered into his ear, and she made even those childish words sound sexy.

"Um… Shannon?" He said, playing along. She moved her hands away quickly and he shivered a little when he saw her face, amber eyes eager to see him. He wrapped his arms around her back and hugged her close. "I missed you _so_ much," he murmured, taking one hand to stroke her blonde hair.

"Me too," she agreed, kissing him on the cheek softly.

"Where's my mom?" He asked her.

"She's in the car, she told me to wait like a civilized person but I just had to see you!" She exclaimed.

"I'm glad you did," he said sincerely.

"Really?" She pouted a little.

"Yeah, really glad," he kissed her on the cheek this time, and she hugged him again. He rocked her back and forth, knowing this wasn't appropriate behavior, but he couldn't help it, and she didn't seem to be arguing.

_This summer was going to be amazing. _


	42. Chapter 42

**Chapter 42**

Shannon and Boone were walking to the liquor store around the corner, ready to buy a ridiculous amount of candy.

"This is going to be so much fun!" Shannon exclaimed. "What movies should we get?"

"Um," Boone hadn't been very eloquent since his arrival. He was speechless in her presence.

"I know! How about Bring it On?"

"Bring it On? Shannon, that's –"

"Okay, we'll get that then. And also Clueless, just because."

"Shaaaanon," he whined. "I don't want to see – "

"And we can get Pretty Woman too!"

"Shannon, those are girl movies."

"Yeah, well, I'm a girl." She shrugged. "And you… well," they rounded the corner, and the liquor store was in view. "You're metro, so that's close enough."

"B-but –" he argued.

"If you want we can get that documentary about the dangers of pop culture, that Sabrina's been telling me about all year." Boone gulped. "Or we could use our brains and go to the library instead." She paused for half a second. "Okay, Bring it On it is. Otherwise no candy for you."

"Fine," he said, faux angry. He would agree to watch flowers grow, as long as it was with Shannon. They arrived in front of the store, and Boone held the door open for Shannon. "You first," he beckoned her inside.

She grabbed his arm and led him towards the candy aisle. "Three words: Sour punch straws," she said eagerly.

"Why are you so hyper?" He wondered. She hadn't stopped talking since they started walking.

"Would you rather have me brood artistically? Like you?"

"I don't brood!" He argued. "And sour punch straws are gross, we need to get M&Ms."

"'Cuz M&M's are more manly?" She teased. "I think if that's true we'd better get the hopelessly girly bubblegum."

"Are you calling me gay?" He wondered.

"All I'm saying is it is weird that you haven't had a girlfriend in a whole year away at college."

"How is that weird?" Okay, so he was digging for compliments. Just a little.

"'Cuz you're gorgeous," she said distractedly, avidly searching through a row of Starbursts.

"Really?"

"Yup," she picked up a package of Tropical Starbursts and smiled, brushing again his arm as they walked towards another aisle in the store. "Now quit digging for compliments, we need some Ben and Jerry's." Boone gulped.

When they got back to the house, they came equipped with sour punch straws, M&M's, Skittles, Starbursts, gummy worms and Ben and Jerry's Ice Cream, and unfortunately for Boone, Bring it On and Clueless. However, he had put his foot down when it came to Pretty Woman.

Sabrina was, as usual, locked up in her office yelling at her subordinates. So Boone and Shannon defrosted a frozen pizza that had been in the freezer for God knows how long, and settled onto the couch, giggling on sugar high while messily eating pizza.

"Shannon, don't get any on the couch!" He begged. "Mom's going to flip!"

"I'm not making a mess!" She retorted. "I think you're making a mess. Do you need some help?" Before he could answer, she took the slice of pizza from him and slowly put the front of it into his mouth. He bit down, and she pulled it away slowly. A drizzle of cheese stuck to his lips. Shannon carefully took it off and popped it into her mouth. She giggled teasingly. "Who's messy now?"

He laughed idiotically, lost for words. "Should I set up the movie?" He scooted away from her and stood up.

Shannon spread her smooth, long legs onto the coffee table, wiggling her bare pedicured feet. "Why are you suddenly so eager, Boone? Do you have a thing for Kirsten Dunst? Or cheerleaders?" No, but I have a thing for you, he thought.

"Nah, I know lots of girls prettier than Kirsten Dunst," he replied. Like you.

"Really? Like who?" She was leading him on, as usual.

"Shannon," he said sternly to her smirking face, lips layered in pizza grease.

"What?" She bit her lip, innocent. "I was just asking a question…"

"Do you have the DVD case?"

"Yeah," it was on the coffee table, under her legs.

"Could you hand it to me?"

"Get it yourself, lazy ass."

He grabbed one leg gently, lifting it up, taking the DVD from her with his other hand. "Thanks for helping me," he rolled his eyes.

"No problem, Boone," He felt a strange twitch in his stomach whenever she said his name. After they had set up the movie, Boone tried not to vomit at watching an hour and a half of preppy girls squealing. But halfway through, Shannon put her head in his lap, which made the duration a lot more enjoyable. When the credits rolled, Boone sighed in relief. But neither of them stood up to turn off the DVD, comfortably nestled against each other.

"Shan," he said quietly after a while. "Shan?"

"Yeah," she murmured lazily into his lap.

"What do you wanna do now?" She muttered something incomprehensible. "What?"

"See, I've suffered through a whole year of ballet without one of your backrubs, you know?" She rolled over so that she was on her back, facing him. "So I was wondering if – "

"Sure!" He replied overzealously. Yes, he would touch her. "Sit up, okay?" She obliged, stretching before sitting up. He tentatively touched her upper back, and rolled his hand in a small circle. Then, he repeated the gesture, slower and deeper. He continued to do this, savoring her reactions – the shudders and tiny sighs, how she clenched her hand on the couch when he ran his hand down her spine, through the thin material of her yellow tank top. "Is that good?" He whispered, his lips too close to her ear.

"Perfect…" she replied, eyes closed. He stopped for a moment, taking in her satisfaction, resting one hand on her thigh. "Boone, keep going," she whined.

"What?" He wanted to hear her say his name again.

"Keep going," he was a little disappointed.

"Okay," he shrugged, moving his hands back to her back, softly rubbing her bare shoulder blades, and then working into her muscles harder and harder. His hand was so close, too close, to her breast, and he wondered if she would notice if her just –

"Boone," she drew out the o's in his name. "Boone, I had this really tight spot over here," she gestured towards her lower spine.

"Sure, Shan," he answered. "Right there?" He tickled a spot on her back.

She giggled. "Oh my god, don't do that! You know I'm – ticklish!"

"Are you?" He asked innocently, tickling her more, on her arms and her stomach.

"Oh-my-god!" She laughed, trying to be serious. "Boone! Don't! Fine you, know what?" Then she turned around and started tickling him on his stomach. Now they were both laughing uncontrollably, and somehow, she ended up on top of him, lying on the couch. Upon realizing this, he stopped tickling her, as did she. She smiled, holding his hand. She played with his fingers, and their eyes were connected.

"Shannon?" He ventured.

She didn't respond, laying her head on Boone's chest. "I missed you. I missed this."

"Yeah, I know. You said that like twenty times already." Not that he minded.

"Well you've said it more. At least fifty times."

"Yeah, maybe," he chuckled.

"Do you have to go back to New York?"

"Don't think about it, it's not for like a month…" But he was already dreading leaving her again.

"Yeah, I guess…" She nestled deeper against him. "I'm tired."

"Me too," he ran his hand through her hair.

"What's going on?" Sabrina's shrill voice suddenly interrupted them. "I heard a lot of noise, you aren't doing anything I'd disapprove of, are you?" Boone quickly tried to move away, but Shannon stayed on top of him. So he was forced to stay in the same compromising position.

"Of course not Sabrina," Shannon said, faux sweet. "We're just resting."

"Don't give me that bullshit," Sabrina cut in. So far this summer, Boone had noticed that Shannon and Sabrina's relationship had further deteriorated. They were sharper with each other. "Just because you can be as spoiled as you want with your father doesn't mean you can –"

"Whatever, Sabrina! Just leave us alone, okay?" Now she looked flustered.

"No! I'm not going to stand for this anymore! You will start obeying me! As long as you're living in this household, under my roof, you – "

"It's Dad's roof too," she muttered.

"Boone!" Sabrina said expectantly.

"What?" he replied slowly.

"Are you going to let her speak to me this way?"

"Am I going to let you? I don't own her."

"I raised you both as best as I could, you know that, and you've both grown up to be so insolent! I'm doing the best I can!" She yelled.

"You aren't even my mother," Shannon said darkly, and moved away from Boone, passing Sabrina and walking up the stairs before she could stop her.

"Shannon! Shannon, get back here!" Sabrina stomped her foot, like a two-year old having a tantrum. She looked meaningfully at Boone, and she too retreated, back into her office. After a few moments, Boone heaved himself off of the couch and went to Shannon's room. Her door was shut, and he knocked cautiously. "Shan, it's me, Boone," he said quietly. "Please let me in."

"Are you going to lecture me too?" A wavering voice responded.

"Of course not," he said. "I'm on your side, remember?" He whispered.

"Fine, come in." He opened the door, and saw her lying on her bed, her eyes damp with tears. Boone sat down next to her, hating to see her upset. "She's always doing this, she hates me."

"Cuz she's a bitch," automatically came out his mouth.

"Boone!" She smiled. "I can't believe you just said that!"

"Neither can I," he agreed. "Shannon, remember we were going to get sleeping bags and sleep downstairs like a sleepover, remember?"

"Yeah," she shrugged. "I dunno."

"Come on," he urged, tucking a piece of her hair behind her ear. "It'll be fun."

"I dunno," she repeated.

"It'll piss off Sabrina," he added.

"Okay," she said after a moment.

"I haven't used my sleeping bag since boy scout camp," he said.

"That's okay, we can just take blankets off our beds."

"True," he nodded. "I'll leave so you can put on your pajamas."

"K, thanks." She grinned warily. "I'll meet you down there in a minute."

They talked (laughed, touched) until the wee hours of the morning. Finally, at about 4 AM, they fell into a deep, sweaty sleep, bodies intertwined.

_Sorry for the long time to update, I started school and I have a ton of homework this year. I hope you liked this chapter. Please review!_


	43. Chapter 43

_Mari is sorry. It's been too long since an update, hasn't it? _

_**Chapter 44**_

Southern California heat pervaded through the hearts and minds of Boone and Shannon that summer. He was so ecstatic to be in her presence again that there were times when he and Shannon would be eating cereal in the kitchen, or watching television, or some other mundane activity, and she would ask him why he was smiling. He would touch the corners of his lips, and realize, that they were indeed turned up at the sides.

Of course, there were days when Shannon hung out with friends – there were so many Boone could hardly keep track of them. But he did. He reluctantly paid especially close attention to her guy friends, and overanalyzed every look, every touch, and every expression they made at each other. And there were the parties she went to often, and, again, reluctantly, he always waited up for her.

He wondered how she behaved at parties – how much she drank, if she drove when she was drunk, how she talked to the other guys, if she hooked up with multiple guys every night only to forget about it the next day, even if she made out with girls at parties just to impress guys.

He asked her once, when they were out of ice cream on a lazy Sunday afternoon. "This might seem really random," he started. She had ice cream on her nose, and her blonde hair flew to the side in the wind. "But," She raised her eyebrows. "Have you ever, like, kissed a girl?"

She smiled disgustedly, shifting her shoulders. "Wow, that _is_ random? Oh, did Sabrina put you up to this? So she can accuse me of being a lesbian as well as a failure at life?"

"No, she didn't. And don't _ever_ call yourself a failure at life." He told her, sincerely.

"I was joking," she looked uncomfortable.

"Yeah I know, but… don't even joke about it. You will never be a failure at life. Don't say that about yourself." He said intensely.

"Okay, I won't do it!" She sounded little bit put off.

"Sorry," he looked down. Now it was his turn to be uncomfortable. "I just get really weird about that stuff, it's like my pet peeve, you know?"

"No," she laughed. "Your pet peeve is when people don't brush their teeth. You told me that."

"It _is_ possible, you know, to have more than one pet peeve. He reached over and wiped the ice cream off her nose. "You're lucky it's not people who spill food all over themselves. "So have you ever kissed a girl?"

"Why do you care so much? Is this a proposition? Do you want to watch me try?"

He wouldn't have minded. "No! God, gross, I just want to know!"

"Probably a few. When I was too drunk to remember fully. But nothing more. I've never done a… three way. Why, did you?"

"No Shan, I've never kissed a girl before." He dead-panned.

"You ever kissed a guy?"

"No." He hated it when people assumed he had.

"Okay," she dismissed, licking her vanilla ice cream off the cone.

"Alright then," he smiled breezily. That hadn't been _too_ awkward.

* * *

Suddenly, it was his last full day in California. Soon he would be trading in sunny skies and swimming pools and… Shannon, for muggy New York coffee-stained college life. He liked college, he really did, but sometimes the distance was just too much for him to bear. If Shannon didn't exist, he would have loved college. That was a weird thought. His life would be totally different if she wasn't around. He couldn't even imagine it. 

Much to his dismay, he had spent the majority of the day on his blue and gray quilt in his bedroom, perusing a political science book. Sabrina was gone, he didn't even pay attention to where these days, and Shannon was at a ballet performance workshop. What a way to spend his last few moments with her.

It was about eight at night when she came into his room. She didn't exactly knock, she more like barged in, brass, but then regained composure and tentatively shut the door. He was watching over the rim of his book. Shannon turned around to look at him, as if she was going to make a speech, but then she just said, "hi."

That was when he stood up and kissed her. He didn't even know what he was doing. He wasn't thinking. All he knew was that he wanted her, so bad, he couldn't even control his emotions anymore.

"Boone," she pulled away. Boone felt a feeling of dismay pervade his body. What the hell was wrong with him? She was going to be _so_ angry with him. "I want to have sex with you." She said. _I want to have sex with you, she said_. Boone widened his eyes in shock. He… he didn't know what he was thinking or feeling. He was numb, all over.

"You… _really_?"

She bit her lip and nodded somberly. "Yeah."

"Okay."

"Okay?" She repeated, whispering.

"Um, yeah." He wasn't sure he remembered how to speak. He touched the hem of her dark pink Henley and began removing it. Her eyes were wide open, so wide she had an almost crazed look in her eyes, and he wondered for a moment if she was high on something. But she was stone cold sober. And so was he. Sober to the point of insanity.

He took her shirt in his hand and slowly placed it on his bedside table. Then he touched the skin of the sides of her hips, smooth, warm, _Shannon's_. Up a little higher he ran his hand over her stomach, but then she jolted away from him for a second. She reached for his shirt, and took it off. She tossed it to the ground, and, his chest bare, he had never felt so naked in his life.

"Shannon," he said, just to feel the movement of his lips when he said it.

She didn't reply. She just stood still, bare feet, black bra, and shorts. The shorts seemed large and misplaced, so he stepped back towards her and unzipped the fly and pulled them off, deliberately. She inhaled and exhaled, as if she was having trouble breathing. He touched her hip bone, grazing his finger over it, and breathed hot air into her ear as she, in turn, took off _his_ pants. He breathed harder into her ear, as her hands traced the contours on his chest, and then he nuzzled his face into her neck, finally working up the courage to kiss her on her collarbone, and then right at the crook of her neck. She was still touching him, his arms and his torso, and tangling one hand in his hair.

In one fluid movement, Boone stroked his hand over her stomach and towards her bra. He reached under it, and she muttered something he couldn't understand. Shannon tucked her fingers underneath the seam of his boxers, and rested them there for a moment before taking them off. She slowly touched him, so soft he couldn't stand it. Boone just stood there, breathing harder and harder. He didn't know what to do – they had never been this close before. She took his hands and led them towards her hips, and Boone, led his hand over her underwear. Then his hands were under the seams, and she closed her eyes, biting her lip. He pulled away, and she opened her eyes, and looked at him. He looked at her too; she was too beautiful.

"Boone," she said, her voice wavering and uncertain, too loud.

"Are you sure you want to –"

"Yes." She interrupted. "I'm sure." He sat down on his bed, and she sat down next to him. She reached towards him, her arm around his neck, and kissed him deeply. He responded to her, dizzy with delirium, and they lay down at the exact same moment. He tentatively climbed on top of her, mere inches between them. "Fuck," she squinted her eyes, and turned away from him, suddenly.

"Shannon," he kissed her on the neck. "Shannon, are you okay?"

Tears were freely running down her face now. Boone had no idea to respond. "Shannon, what's the matter? Talk to me," he ran his hand through her hair.

"I'm cold," she whispered.

"Cold? We can take care of that, we can get a blanket…" He was completely confused now.

"You don't understand," she cried.

"You're right, I don't. So why don't you explain it to me, Shan? Please?" _I love you_, he wanted to add.

"Hand me my shirt, okay?" She said so quietly, he could barely hear her.

"Yeah," he tried not to sound too disappointed. "Yeah, here." She moved underneath the covers, and he followed suit. Her arms wrapped around his neck, she closed her eyes, and dozed off. Boone, on the other hand, was awake until dawn arrived, when he finally fell into a fitful sleep.

* * *

When Boone woke up, she was kneeling on the bed, face red, runny nose, crying unadulterated. He wasn't sure if he was awake or dreaming, or if anything he remembered from last night had happened. Her breathing was irregular; she was almost hyperventilating. "Oh no, not the asthma," he said, now fully awake. He sat up and put his hand on her back, trying to calm her. 

"Get – away – from – me!" She struggled.

"What?"

"Get the fuck away from me, Boone! I'm serious!" She yelled.

"Shannon, I'm sorry, where is your inhaler?"

"I don't need my fucking inhaler, I'm _fine_. Just get away from me," she sounded so afraid, and it almost made Boone want to cry. What had he done to her?

"Shannon, it's… my room," he said uncomfortably. "Look, I'm sorry about whatever I did. I'm sorry about last night."

"Nothing happened last night, Boone." She told him dangerously. "Absolutely _nothing_."

"What? Shannon, this I – you're – "

"I'm _what_?" She spat.

Boone put his head in his hands. What was happening to them? "I don't know." He shook his head. "Can you please just tell me what's wrong?"

"Get away from me." She said. He rolled out of bed, and it became suddenly apparent how naked he was. He grabbed his boxers from the floor, and put them on as quickly as possible. "Give me – my shorts. Right now." He gave them to her; he hadn't ever felt so dismayed in his life.

Shannon shrieked miserably, and started rocking herself back and forth on the bedspread, sobbing. God, he wanted to hold her.

Boone took his suitcases and a pair of clothes and left the room, shutting the door behind him as he left. Within an hour, he had left the house, with his plane tickets, and was riding in a taxi on the way to the airport. The only thing he could do properly, it seemed, was breathe.


	44. Chapter 44

_**Chapter 44**_

New York had never looked so drab to Boone before. All of the buildings, the skyscrapers that he had once been in awe of, and the streets and the skies were just so gray. He wished that something would be another color – like blonde, the color of her hair, or brown, her eyes. A part of him doubted her would ever see those colors again.

He was in a taxi on the way to NYU. This year, he and Ben were renting a small university owned apartment. Boone had been excited before, but now everything was muted. Everything but the regret he felt about what he and Shannon had done, and how much he wished it could just go back to how it was before. Then, there had been hope for something more. But now there wasn't. He didn't even know what he had been expecting. _What, did you think you'd get married?_ He taunted himself. His mind played over every kiss, the feeling of her smooth, bare skin.; he tortured himself.

"Hey kid," said the cab driver. Boone had been so involved with his own thoughts; he hadn't even noticed that the driver was any older than him. Now, when Boone looked up, he saw that the man was indeed in his mid fifties or sixties, and of course, his hair was gray. "Is this where you're stopping?"

"…Yeah," his response was delayed. He handed a twenty to the driver and stepped out of the cab, starting towards the sidewalk.

"Hey kid," the cab driver repeated. "You forgot your stuff." Boone turned around slowly, not even taking the effort to feel embarrassed.

"..Oh." Boone opened the trunk of the car and took out the three heavy suitcases. He didn't even notice the weight.

"Need any help?" Said the driver.

"…No. Thanks. I'm on the first floor." He told the man in a monotone. "Goodbye," he said. It sounded so tragic.

Boone began to lug his bags down the sidewalk. His apartment number was 174. Finally, he reached the complex, when he was suddenly bombarded by Ben. "Hey!" His excitement was intimidating. Boone backed away.

"Hi."

"Dude, how tight is this year going to be?" Boone nodded. It was going to be _tight_, without Shannon speaking to him. His life might as well be over. "You okay, man?" He clapped a hand on Boone's back. "Come on, let me take a suitcase." Ben grabbed a suitcase from Boone.

"Thank you," he replied robotically. He followed Ben into the apartment. Everything in it was neutral colored. He wanted to puke. "Fuck," he muttered under his breath.

"Oh my god Boone!" Lilly appeared out of the other room. "Boone, I missed you so much!" Lilly enveloped him in a close hug. She kissed him on the cheek, and Boone flinched. He was so uncomfortable with touch. One wrong move, and everything could shatter. "You could have called me, but, that's okay, I'm so happy to see you!" She pulled away. "You look… you look… tired."

"Yeah. I am. Look, you guys, I'm… going to take a nap."

Ben looked taken aback. "A nap? Now? You just got here, man. You don't even know where your room is."

"I'm sure I can manage," he replied coolly.

"Boone, honey, are you sick?" Lilly put a hand on Boone's forehead. "You do feel sort of clammy."

"I'm fine," he flinched away. "Don't call me honey. Nobody calls me honey."

"Okay," Lilly looked hurt, but Boone didn't even notice. "Feel better, okay?"

"Yeah," he grumbled under his breath. He wasn't even thinking about hurting other people's feelings right now.

Boone located his room – the bed was made of old factory-produced probably not even real wood, and there were no sheets on it, just a hard gray mattress. He didn't even care. He lay down and closed his eyes, but he never did fall asleep. He just tossed and turned and cried a little, thinking about what he could've would've should've done last night. He wondered what Shannon was doing now. Maybe she was just as sad as he was, but he doubted it. She was probably out with friends, shopping, like nothing had ever happened, or maybe… he couldn't even think about her right now.

"Boone," Ben arrived in his room about an hour after he had retreated to his bedroom. "What's going on?"

"_Nothing_," Boone replied bitingly. "I'm trying to sleep, okay?"

"Does it have something to do with…" he lowered his voice, "Shannon?"

Boone didn't reply. Why did he always have to be so goddamn predictable?

* * *

The next few weeks passed similarly – Boone chose classes half-heartedly, went to them a little over half the time. He was just so damn tired, he felt like he hadn't slept properly in ages. Some days he couldn't even pull himself out of bed, and other days he would sit in front of the television and say things to Ben and Lilly that he didn't mean. He hated the person he was becoming.

"Maybe you should get some help?" Lilly suggested cautiously one day, sitting at the couch next to him.

"Are you calling me crazy?" He snapped back, and pretended to be paying close attention to whatever stupid daytime talk show he was watching.

"No, Boone, I just… we miss you. We miss how you used to be. What happened?" She sounded close to tears.

"I don't know," he said. God, he wished he didn't have to be this way. "I'll try to be better."

It was the best response he'd given since his arrival. Lilly smiled slightly, and he let her pat him on the shoulder.

But Shannon was still the only person on his mind. Every night, random images of her before he had gone and ruined everything flashed in his mind: a ten year old Shannon twirling around in a tutu in the kitchen, smiling that innocent crooked-teeth smile. Then there was Shannon in middle school, face soaked with tears as she poked her spoon into her plastic container of yogurt because the other kids made fun of her for being too tall. Shannon on her first day of 9th grade, straightening out her skirt, pursed lips, and asking Boone if her hair looked okay; She was floating on her back in the pool on one of those sticky heat days where he could even see the warmth on her lips.

He could still recount every touch. But he knew there wouldn't be any more touches.

_Sorry you guys for taking so long to update lately. But I am determined to FINISH THIS STORY, lol. Probably like 5-6 chapters left. Thanks Jeremy for beta-ing. And that last part wasn't meant to be italics. It just did that. Hope you like the chapter. Poor Boonie! OMG HE WAS SO FRICKIN' BEAUTIFUL ON LOST LAST NIGHT!_


	45. Chapter 45

_**Chapter 45**_

"Boone," said a voice. Boone rolled over in his bed, groggy. "Boone," said the voice again.

"Whaaaa?" Boone opened his eyes slightly to see Ben's concerned face looking down at him.

"Wake up," Ben urged.

"You don't… wake me up…" he muttered, and turned over away from him.

"Are you honestly sleeping at six PM on a Friday night?" Ben asked. "Do you know _how_ lame that is?"

"You didn't seem to care last week." Boone said slowly.

"Yeah, well, this is the third week in a row. Get up, we're going to a party."

"You can go, you and Lilly have fun," he tossed his arm awkwardly towards Ben.

"_No_, you're coming with. That's the whole point."

"Noooo, you wake me up and now you want me to go to a fucking party?" He said into his pillow.

"Basically. Dude, get up."

"Not going to any fucking party," he repeated.

"I'll have Lilly come over and drag you." That didn't sound too pleasant.

"Fiiiine, fuck you." He'd been swearing a lot more lately.

Twenty minutes later, Boone and Ben were standing in front of a loud looking apartment. "Whose party is this, anyway?" Boone asked warily.

"Does it matter?"

"I guess not. Can't we just go back? I'm so tired, and I don't like parties…"

"You don't like _anything_ these days," he muttered.

"Shut _up_," he snapped. "I'm serious, man, you don't know how this shit is."

"You're right, I don't," Ben replied snidely. "I'm trying to fucking _understand you_, but I can't. I don't know why you're being like this – to me, to Lilly. I mean, you're mad at Shannon, and she's just a girl. I mean, me and Lilly are your _friends_, Boone. Doesn't that mean any –"

Boone was becoming more and more angry from each word Ben said. "Don't tell me she's _just_ a girl! She is so much more than that! Go to hell, Ben." And with that, Boone stalked into the party ahead of a shocked Ben.

He just wanted to escape. He wanted to escape from his past, and his memories of her. He just wanted to get away.

"Hey," A small blonde girl cornered him right as he was walking into the crowded room. "Do I know you?" She bit her lip, or tried to, but she was pretty drunk.

"No," he said, and kept walking. He didn't look back.

"Hiiii," A curvy brunette girl exclaimed, brushing against Boone. "What's your name?"

"Boone," he replied. "I gotta go."

"What? You just got here?" She was an up-talker.

"I meant, over there," he told her reluctantly, pointing towards the couch.

"Oh, I'll come with you? I mean, can I come with you?" He didn't respond, just kept going towards his destination. Maybe she would take a hint. Unfortunately, he didn't quite make it to the couch before someone else approached him. This time it was some guy.

"Hey, dude," he said.

"Hi?" Boone didn't especially feel like making friends.

"Want some weed?" He said loudly. Boone had smoked pot, but he hadn't ever actually bought it. It felt kind of shady.

"Yeah," he said, trying to be cool. The transaction was pretty simple, kind of like paying a friend back for buying you coffee. Honestly, he was a little confused about what to do with the bag. He stared at it for a while, weighing the options.

"Hey pretty boy, what do you think you're doing?" It was Ted.

"Ted," Boone was actually slightly excited to see him. "Look, can you help me?" He said quietly.

"Sure, Boone!" He exclaimed. "You don't know how to roll it, I guess I should help you!" He nearly shouted.

"Ted! Shut up! Of course I know how to… it's just that I'm like… I have this cognitive disorder and –"

"Shut up!" he grabbed the bag for him and rolled the marijuana inside of a joint, which he just _happened_ to be carrying around. Ted was pretty sketch.

* * *

About twenty minutes later, Boone was stoned out of his mind. This had been a really stupid idea. He sat lazily on the couch, feeling thirsty and blasé. A girl with reddish-blonde (or was it just blonde) hair approached him.

"Hey, what's your name?" Boone asked the girl. His words kind of slurred together strangely.

"I'm Allie," she said, and sat down. "Do you go to NYU?"

"Do I go to NYU?" He repeated. "Uh…" he chuckled. "Yuh."

"Do you come to parties a lot?" She asked.

"You're pretty," he replied, and put his arm around her. "Are you like, intoxicated?"

"No," she blushed. "Not yet?"

"Itzok," he answered, "I'm not usually either."

"But you are now," she concluded.

"Yuh. I feel really… itchy."

"Itchy?"

"Nah, nah, I meant thirsty."

"Uh _huh_," she said slowly.

"What did you say your name was? Shannon?"

"Allie," she smiled. "You really _are_ stoned."

"Yeah, I don't have much of a toler… what's that word?"

"Tolerance," she seemed amused. "So you're usually a good boy?"

"I dunno. I've thought some pretty dirty things."

"Have you _done_ dirty things?"

"A little. But I'm not a ho or anything."

"Good to know," she rolled her eyes.

"Hey look!" Boone exclaimed. "There's Ben!" He pointed sloppily towards Ben, who was approaching them.

"Do you know him?" Allie adjusted her pink shirt. It looked good on her.

"I like your shirt," Boone replied.

"Thank you. Do you know that guy?"

"Uh huh, that's Ben my roommate. We're _fighting_." Allie nodded.

"Boone, are you okay?" Ben walked over. "I know you were –"

"Hi Ben!" Boone exclaimed.

"Oh god, you're not stoned are you?"

"So what if I am?" He said, somewhat like a snotty four year old girl.

"You're just not in very good shape, that's all."

"Thanks, Mom," he rolled his eyes. "You have food in your teeth."

"Really? Where?" Ben asked.

"Lettuce, like there."

"Oh, I'll go look in the mirror." Boone guffawed when he left.

"Oops, guess that was a mean trick."

"Yeah, kind of," Allie said.

"You're pretty," he told her again. "You look like… someone I know." Boone grazed his hand over her knee. "Do you have a boyfriend?"

"No," she laughed. "I wouldn't be here if I did."

"So you wouldn't mind if I kissed you?" He didn't wait for her to respond. He felt nauseous, almost to the point of vomiting, to be kissing someone other than Shannon. He shouldn't be so audacious - he didn't want to poison this girl too.

* * *

About 2 hours later, Boone had ditched Ben and was lying on Allie's bed. He guessed the marijuana had unleashed some perverted guy inside of him that didn't really exist. No, it didn't. Or maybe he had just wanted Shannon so badly he had pretended Allie was her so that he could at least fake loving Shannon. Yeah, that was it.

"_Hey_," Allie emerged from the bathroom in a towel, soaking wet. "You want to get some breakfast?"

"It's 2 AM." He said shortly. This was so weird.

"Okay…" she giggled. "Then do you want to go again?"

"You just took a shower," he replied.

"Okay… then, what do you want to do?" She inched closer to him.

"I should get home. You know, I should get home."

"Um, alright," she looked uncomfortable. "See you then?"

"Yeah," Boone put on his clothes hurriedly. Allie leaned in for a goodbye kiss, but Boone refused it. "See you Shan," he said. It took him a moment to realize what a horrible mistake he had made.

"_What?_" Allie scowled at him, her voice dripped with anger.

"Nothing," he said defensively. "I didn't say anything!"

"Yes, you did. You called me Shannon. You called me Shannon when I met you, you called me Shannon when we were kissing, you called me Shannon just now. I mean, I knew this would just be one of those one-night things, but I expected you to at least somewhat respect me!"

"I didn't say it while we were kissing!"

"Yes, you did. You don't even remember because you were so fucking high!"

"Allie, I'm sorry. I really am. But I have to go."

"Fine! Leave! But just know you're a bad person, and I don't have a reason to believe _anything_ you say! Get out of my dorm!" She screamed.

"Okay, okay!" he said, and started leaving. He was such scum. What had become of him, anyway? Where was Boone, did he even exist anymore?

* * *

Boone got lost in Times Square on his way home. When he got back to his apartment, dawn had nearly arrived. He felt so tired, so awful, just _hungry_. He was hungry for love, he was hungry for friends, he was hungry for _her_. Now that she wasn't in his life, it was like there was nothing worth living for.

When he opened the door of his apartment, Ben and Lilly were waiting up for him.

"I'm sorry," Boone started. He was nearly crying. "I'm so fucking sorry," he gave Ben a long hug, and then he gave Lilly a hug.

_These were the people worth living for._

* * *

_Hey, sorry you guys it took forever. I'm just not that into this story anymore, but I will finish it. Please review and thank you Jeremy for beta-ing. I hope you like it! _


	46. Chapter 46

_**Chapter 46**_

After months of dragging himself around campus, Boone was finally beginning to pull himself together, or at least do a better job of hiding how he felt inside.

He was aware that she was slipping away from him – her warm syrup eyes in his mind, her soft golden hair, and the way she electrocuted him when she touched him. Instead of being harshly obstinate, he had now accepted this with quiet defeat. Now he was trying to live for something else, but it was something he hadn't been able to find yet. He went through the motions of daily life slowly, but more smoothly than he had before. It went like this: wake up, pour coffee, eat cereal, go to class, take notes, come home, flip pages, eat something, go to bed. This routine continued through the months, as he avoided anything that would remind him of her.

In fact, he had so little contact with his former world that when his mother called, his responses were terse and awkward, and if Shan ever came up in conversation, Boone would promptly make an excuse and hang up.

Ben and Lilly were cautious around him – they were still afraid that he would become the bitter, immoral person he was for the first few months of his second school year. They never suggested going to a party again, or pushed him about anything. If he wanted to order Chinese food and Lilly wanted pizza, there usually wasn't an argument. They also behaved less cuddly around Boone, as if he would be bothered by it. That was how the next few months of his second year passed. During winter break he stayed in New York. For a few days, Ben went to meet Lilly's parents, and Boone was left alone in the apartment. He considered doing something drastic, but instead he just drowned himself in front of the television and daydreamed about Shannon.

One afternoon after a strenuous day of classes, Boone was so exhausted that he put on his blue plaid pajamas and dorky socks the moment he arrived back to his apartment, accompanied by a bowl of two day old oatmeal. He logged onto his email and was surprised to find a message from Anna, which essentially told Boone that she would be in town the following weekend, but the email was interspersed with an annoying number of endearments towards Boone. He wasn't sure about seeing her – perhaps her mannerisms would bring back too many memories of Shannon and the experiences they had had together. But he also knew how much Anna liked him and what little family she had, so he decided that he could handle seeing her, to at least be a source of support for her. He missed supporting Shannon, and he figured that supporting Anna would be second best.

He dialed her number to confirm what time he would see her. He wasn't much into emailing or text messaging. As Shannon had once said, imitating an old woman, "You just can't deal with all these new fangled things," her voice ridden with sarcasm. Being away from her was beginning to feel redundant.

His life without her made it shockingly apparent how empty he felt without her. She was the source of all the passion and feeling in his thoughts and actions, and he had taken her presence for granted for so long. Their separation had occurred so quickly that some mornings he still woke up expecting a call or email from her, or better yet, waking up to the smell of stream and Garnier Fructis shampoo wafting from the bathroom where she had just stepped out of the shower...

"_Is anyone there_?" Anna's asked in frustration. Boone had gotten so involved in his own mind that he had forgotten he was calling her.

"Oh yeah, sorry, it's Boone," he replied quickly.

"I know, I have caller ID," she said coolly.

"Um, okay… Anyway, I just got your email. You're in town?"

"Yeah, for two more days. Come see me." Boone was always a little taken-aback by Anna's directness. But she had a little whine in her voice that made Boone assume the worst – she wanted to have sex.

"Okaaay," he said, confused. "Where are you?"

"The same hotel as last time… do you remember where it is? I can buzz you up."

"It's the one with the green awning, right? On 87th?"

"Yeah, that's the right one Boone." She giggled, in a way that was almost odd.

"Uh, hey, I was gonna ask you something." He said, sighing. "Um," he mustered. "Have you talked to uh, Shannon, lately?" He hadn't said her name in such a long time, it was almost difficult to pronounce.

"I haven't, actually. It's been a _really_ long time."

"Oh," Boone said slowly. He was almost relieved that he didn't have to hear about her. It was too hard.

"How is she?" Anna asked casually.

"Uh… um, she's fine."

"Care to elaborate?"

"Uh, I have to pee."

"Have fun, then," Anna said dubiously. She sounded suspicious.

"See you in a few hours then."

"Okay, bye-bye."

"Bye."

A few hours later, Boone was knocking on the door at the ritzy hotel where Anna was staying. She opened the door, smiling. Her hair was down and still a little damp, and she only wore a bit of makeup and jeans, Ugg Boots and a tight sweater with a sloping v-neck. Shannon had the same sweater in yellow. Anna didn't know what had happened between him and Shannon, so she had probably worn the same sweater on purpose. She had found out that Boone was in love with Shannon, and not her, while they were dating, and now Boone and Anna had a standing offer for messing around whenever Anna was in town. But Boone didn't think he was ready to mess around with _anyone_, after the debacle with Allie a few weeks before. When Boone saw Anna today, he was suddenly enveloped with the smell, sound, and feeling of Shannon's presence – Anna was the first person close to Shannon he had spoken to in nearly six months. "Hey," he said, trying to sound confident, but his voice shook a little. He sounded so damn weak.

"Hi, Boone," Anna said, smiling coquettishly. She hugged him, and he found himself unable to let go. She kissed him on the cheek at first, then on the lips, and her lips against his felt foreign, almost poison. He attempted to kiss her back, but it wasn't right. "Boone, what's wrong with you?" She murmured. "C'mon, I know you're a good kisser!" He figured out how to kiss her with tongue trying not to think of Shannon, or the fact that his tongue seemed way too small for her mouth, or something weird and awkward like that. Anna didn't seem to pick up on this, though. "Good," she muttered, and reached up under his navy blue t-shirt. She ran her hands over his chest, and tried to lean him back onto the bed.

"Anna, let's not do this." He said adamantly. This was so very _wrong_.

"What? Why? What's wrong, Boone?" Anna was not used to being refused.

"Look, I just can't, okay!" He told her vehemently. He stood up and walked to the window of her extravagant hotel room.

"Did I do something wrong? I don't understand," Anna seemed quite stressed out that he wouldn't have sex with her.

Boone suddenly had a strong urge to hit his head against the wall. But luckily, he held the urge. "FUCK!" He yelled instead. He was so upset he started hitting the window so it shook.

"Boone, calm down! I've never seen you this way before!" Boone stopped, and sat down and started crying. He was such a girl it was sickening to him.

"What happened! Tell me NOW, Boone!" He didn't respond. "Is it Shannon?" She reached over to put her arm around him. He pushed her away.

"Yes," he said finally. "It's always Shannon, right?" He laughed bitterly. "Um, the night before I came back to New York, we got really close to, uh, having sex…"

"That's good, right?" Boone ignored her and continued. "But then she freaked out, I guess, and was really mad at me, right? And we haven't talked since."

"I need a cigarette." Anna proclaimed.

"You don't smoke anymore, I thought," Boone said.

"_Maybe I need to. We all have our addictions."_


	47. Chapter 47

**Chapter 47 – Skinned Knees are Easier to Fix Than Broken Hearts **

Boone sat in his apartment late one night, and he let his mind gently drift to thoughts of childhood, home, and the sister he had always loved too much.

He remembered the family portrait Sabrina had forced them to take. The photograph still hung over the stairwell, and it was still dull and stiff, like it was when it was taken, that afternoon when Sabrina had herded him, Adam and Shannon into the professional photographer's studio. She had forced Boone to wear patent leather shoes that clicked when he walked but were three sizes too small – they itched and compressed and shot arrows of pain throughout his legs. Why did he still remember those shoes so well?

He thought about how different things were now. Gone were the days they used to spend hours wasting time, pleasantly ignoring the feelings that made the space between them. He hadn't talked to her like that in about a year now, and though she was beginning to gently float away – wasn't that what Boone had been wishing for? Now that her disappearance from his life was a distinct possibility, now he wanted to get her back. You always want what you can't have, he remembered the words he'd heard so many times.

Boone had a sour taste in his mouth, one he'd had since the fateful night last summer when they'd gotten so close to being one together. The taste was raw and mildewed and needed to be fed, but there was nothing he could do to feed it. And he was so tired.

Boone had met Shannon when he was ten, and she was eight. Boone had fallen in love with Shannon the first time he saw her smile. Somehow, when he'd met her, he had known that this little girl would be responsible for something huge – but never something this huge. She'd been embroidered into his skin since the day they'd met. Perhaps he'd let them rot, but they'd still leave gnarled scars on his arms. And they were too deeply embedded to remove.

You are sick, he told himself. The words had lost their significance years ago. They meant nothing anymore.

The ring of his cell phone interrupted his thoughts. He looked at the screen. What? No, it couldn't be. Just answer it, he told himself, and before he could change his mind he did.

"Hello?" He forced. It was probably the hardest word he'd ever said.

"Hello," an equally awkward voice responded. But it was Shannon's voice, and the memories flooded back. He needed to hang up, and he needed to do it now. Don't be a coward. He stayed on the line. "Anna said, um, Anna said that you were unhappy." Her voice sounded weak, but sure.

"Anna wasn't supposed to say that."

"Are you angry?" Shannon asked him gently, but they both knew that it wasn't about Anna telling Shannon what he had told her in confidence.

"No…" he said slowly. "I guess I'm just confused." His voice strengthened.

"I'm sorry about what happened. I'm sorry," she sounded like she was near tears.

"What happened to us?" He asked as calmly as he could muster. This felt so tragic.

"I guess it just hit me what was going to happen. I mean, that sounds stupid. But, there were suddenly all these implications that I thought about. I hadn't been thinking about it, and then all of the sudden I did." She sniffed.

"Yeah, well, maybe you should of thought of those sooner."

"I know. I'm so sorry. I really couldn't have had a worse reaction."

"It's okay," he found himself tender, babying her again. There was a silence.

"Boone?"

"Yes?"

"Can we be friends again?"

"Of course," he replied. "Anything you want, Shan." He meant it a little too much.

"But we can't let anything happen, ever again."

"I know." He meant to say this in a definite voice, but it came off more as hollow and bitten. She didn't seem to detect this.

"I mean, we were just messing around, right? It was just a phase," She ventured.

"Yeah, of course." He scoffed and bit back words he'd been trying to say for years. "Of course."

"Okay," Shannon sounded relieved. "I'm glad we worked this out."

"Yeah, me too. Great," he said too heartily. God, it was amazing to hear her voice again. "So what's going on? How's your life?"

"Um, it's good," she said slowly.

"How's ballet?"

"It's really good! I'm actually teaching a class."

"Really? That's awesome, Shannon, it really is," he told her.

"It's just a few sections of beginning ballet, and I get a stipend."

"Good," he said.

"It's not much, but it's something." Another pause.

"How's Sabrina?" Boone asked wearily.

"She sucks," Shannon said with so much vehemence Boone laughed a little. "She hates me."

"She doesn't hate you, she's just an idiot."

"Have you talked to her lately?" Shannon asked.

"I try to as little as possible."

"She thinks you're living this really bad lifestyle. She thinks you're into like sex, drugs and rock and roll, and shit," she laughed. "She thinks you're in like a metal band and have groupies."

"What?" They both laughed about this. He'd forgotten how pure her laugh was. "Oh my god, what the fuck, that's crazy… groupies."

"I know, right?" She giggled. Boone smiled to himself for a moment, and they sat in comfortable silence for a moment. He wanted to stay on the line forever. All of the hazy sleepiness he'd felt in the past months seemed to disappear. He was suddenly energized – he wanted to stand up and start getting things done. He stood up fitfully, when he realized, bluntly, that she was his drug. He sat back in his chair, breathing slowly. "Are you okay?" She asked.

"I'm fine. I have to go, sorry. Ben is yelling at me about leaving my cereal out," he lied. For someone he was in love with, he certainly lied to her a lot.

* * *

The day before his last final, Boone got another call. 

Boone had answered the phone, hoping it might be Shannon. It wasn't.

"Hello, Boone," said the terse, cold voice of his mother, Sabrina Carlyle.

"Hi, Mom," he bit back a laugh. Maybe she was calling to ask him more about his metal band.

"Boone, I have something very important to tell you." Her voice sounded lower than usual – she sounded strange.

"Okay…" he said. "What is it?"

"Adam, well… Adam died."

Boone took a moment to comprehend these two words. "What?" He sat down. "What? Are you serious?"

"Would I be joking," Sabrina asked, but she phrased it like a statement.

"Oh my god," Boone sighed. "Oh my fucking god. What happened?"

Sabrina didn't even reprimand Boone for his language. "He was hit by a car. He didn't suffer."

Boone was shocked, almost disgusted, by Sabrina's composure. It was her husband! And he was dead. Adam had never played a large role in Boone's life, but he had a feeling that now that he was dead, he would play a more significant part. He didn't know why. He just felt it.

Sabrina sighed. "We-we're having a wake on Sunday. You'll come," she said crisply. "Right?" She added, a bit quieter.

"Of course, Mom," he told her. "How's Shannon dealing?"

"I don't know. She hasn't left her room," Sabrina reverted back to her cold self.

"Has she eaten?" Boone demanded.

"No, I let her starve! What kind of person do you think I am, Boone?"

"Sorry, I didn't mean it that way."

"It's fine."

"I can't believe this," Boone said.

"He went fast. There wasn't any pain."

"Well, I'll get a flight tomorrow," he sighed. "And then, I'll be there."

"You'll be here." She repeated. They hung up soon after, and no tears were shed by either party. The formality of the matter shocked Boone, but he couldn't seem to muster much emotion for the actual situation.

* * *

The next few days and the flight passed in a haze. What he remembered most vividly was when he saw her, standing by her father's grave at the wake. Her blonde hair lay wavy and long over her thin shoulders. She wore a black dress that made her look thin and young, but still beautiful. She wore little makeup, and her eyes were dull from tears, but she was still a vision. It had been hard to imagine her in his mind for so long, and now she was so familiar yet so foreign, he almost felt like he was in a completely different world than her. 

"Boone!" Her voice rang out. It took him a moment to realize she was speaking to him.

"Hey. I'm so sorry, Shannon," he said, and held her close to him for a long time. She seemed to ease into the hug, but they got used to each other's bodies quickly. He realized right then and right there that they needed each other, and neither of them could live without the other. It occurred to him that nothing would ever mean this much. All this living, he did it for her.

She was an ache of longing that festered inside of him constantly. Boone hoped that one day they would be together, but he only knew one thing:

He'd never let her go.

* * *

_ Oh my gosh, you guys, I finished! It's done! Wow! I hope it turned out well, it really wasn't meant to become this long, but it did, and thank you for everyone's support! I'm actually pretty proud of this story, and I'm actually going to edit it so that it is about my own characters, so maybe I can do something else with it. This whole story actually ended up being about 100,000 words, the length of a long novel! Anyway, even though Shannon and Boone are dead on the show, and this is probably my last fanfiction, I hope that you enjoyed the little fantasy backstory I created for them. Please review! I'm interested in your thoughts!_


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